I died over a hundred times in this cave, fighting, struggling against the beast.
The pain used to tear through me, but now it's dull, so dull I barely notice it anymore. It clasps at my flames, my Var, and I just fight, trying to learn its patterns.
I'm doing my best to hold my ground against this creature, but no matter what I do, I can't defeat it. I'm too tired.
I'm like a small fish in a little pond, unable to escape.
Then, a throne appears.
"F**k!" I yell, my voice cracked with exhaustion.
My heart pounds. The pressure is too much, a constant pain in my chest.
Beira has returned. She sits on the throne, watching with quiet amusement.
"I really thought you had that one," she laughs.
"F**k you," I growl. "Send me back.".
I wake up, but I don't know how many times have passed. The bear is resting, and it feels like every time I die, I die more. My body needs more time to heal.
The bear is lying against the cave wall, tired from our fight. A small fire lingers, warming the cave.
I focus. I gather my Var, encasing myself in a shield, wrapping it tight around me. The air grows heavy, and I sweat, feeling the burn.
The bear awakens, rushing toward me, not giving me a chance.
I push the Var into the fire, letting it crackle and explode in a flash of light. I roar, sending the echo of my yell through the cave, disorienting the bear.
Its massive form stumbles back, confused. I don't hesitate. I twist the Var, shaping it into my sword, my shield, my fists, and I punch the bear again, then again, over and over. It's getting weaker.
Finally, I'm on top of it, my teeth sinking in, eating the beast whole.
It slashes me with its large paw, sending me flying back. I see echoes of a throne.
I blink. I'm back to being that small fish. I feel like I'm drowning in the darkness of this cave.
A wave of anger crashes through me. The rage builds and twists inside, like it's going to tear me apart. It's not enough. I can't stop now. If I escape, it'll just catch me again.
I attack with flames again, this time forming a punch made of fire and Var. The explosion sends the bear sliding back, but it isn't done. It rises, but I have no more Var. I use every last drop of it, my body trembling, every inch of me screaming. The bear stumbles, defeated.
And then, finally...
"I won!!!" I yelled.
"I actually won!"
I collapse.
The bear's pearl floats before me, sinking into the waves of my own.
A soothing feeling fills my body, almost numbing the pain—a warm, tingling sensation as the pearl absorbs into me.
I lie on the cold stone of the cave, waiting, wondering. The marks on my side haven't healed yet. The pain is sharp, a stinging reminder.
I thought it would be easy to reset, but it isn't. Blood keeps pouring from the wound, more and more, covering the cave floor in a thin layer of red.
I wake up later, unsure how much time has passed. Days, maybe. The cave entrance is destroyed. I lie there, alone.
Alone, with the bear's corpse.
Eating it is awful. The pain, the fighting, the torment—I have to get stronger. But is this enough?
Living again, dying again, over and over. Maybe it isn't as great as I thought.
No.
I got revenge. Revenge for Eghiss. This monster ate her wing. Her wing.
I cry. I cry and cry, alone in that cave, giving myself time to recover. Physically, I'm fine. Mentally, I'm ruined.
I sit on the stone and look inward. My core—it's dimmer. Same shape, same color, just... less.
Maybe the best part of living is dying for something that matters. But what if you live long enough to see everyone else die instead?
I break through the rubble of the cave with my Var. The night is calm, the moon casting a bright silver glow.
It's been a day. I wonder if they think I'm dead. The wound from the bear has closed slightly, but blood still trickles as I walk through the woods.
I hear a voice.
"Availeth."
Then another.
And another.
I call back, my voice echoing with Var, trying to get their attention. The voice is familiar—it's Kundra.
"Ava? That you?" Kundra calls as he descends toward me.
"Yeah," I mumble, my vision blurring.
Kundra steps closer, his sharp eyes narrowing as he looks at me over. When he sees the wound, his expression hardens.
"You alright?" he asks.
"I'm fine," I mumble. "Just need rest."
Behind him, Ryllie drops down from the trees, her golden eyes scanning me. In the dim light, I catch sight of a wing that looks like Eghiss's.
"How's Eghiss?" I ask.
Ryllie's expression tightens, something somber in her gaze. "A bear got her. She's bad, but she'll live."
She steps forward, offering a hand. "I'll carry you."
Before I can answer, Kundra shakes his head.
"Go on ahead. I'll bring him."
Ryllie hesitates, then nods and disappears into the woods.
Ryllie takes off, her wings slicing through the night air, leaving me alone with Kundra. He watches her go before turning back to me, his sharp eyes unreadable.
"How many times did you die?"
"Ten." I force a smirk. "Killed it, though."
"You actually killed it?" he asks, arms crossed. "Only took you ten deaths?"
There's something almost amused in his voice, like he expected worse.
I force a smirk. "Yeah. Surprised?"
Kundra exhales, shaking his head.
"Considering your pearl? A little." His gaze flicks to my wound.
"How'd you know I fought the bear?"
"I sensed it with Var," he says simply.
I hesitate before asking, "Would Ryllie know?"
Kundra's expression darkens slightly. "For your sake? Hopefully not."
That doesn't sit right with me. "Why?"
His eyes flicker with something unreadable. "Because she'd kill you until her core was clear."
Kundra looks past me, toward the sky where Ryllie vanished. His voice is quieter when he speaks.
"Let's go home."