This was it. The final few days of the second year of highschool. Only a little bit separated me from the final year in that building. And to be fair, I will miss it. This environment I had spent years in was the perfect thing to observe. What else of youth was I able to uncover, to disassociate and document. Such exquisite behavior was none to other. It would really be disappointing to not take anything out of that. highschool was the pinnacle of youth to some extent, the last years of individuals which they could spend care-free living in their dream worlds before they would crack under the weight of responsibilities that awaited them after this era in their lives. Their financial stability would be at stake, stress because of other work would pile up as well as more. All of them were yet to realize that this was a serious matter they should be taking notice of, but such enlightenments only happen to a very few.
At school, things weren't much better. Since the summer holidays don't exactly start in summer, rather half of May, most of the students were planning a more spring-like approach to the holidays. Most of the typical stuff was on the table: Shopping, vacation, partying, all the classical events one could think of. As expected. But what really was throwing me off was the sudden motion around me. People started to talk to me more, or rather just two. Or, rather just one and one companion. Elisea was making excuses to try to get into my close proximity, mostly under the pretense of 'Wanting to talk because I seemed like an interesting person.' It was a weird attempt to say it clear: Not only did it not sit right with her reputation and socially prescribed 'standards', it also hung up a sharp clock over my neck, just like 'The Pit and the Pendulum'. The social circle around her began to treat me like an invader in their well-constructed wall of friends, which Elisea and Shena were part of. This was less than optimal. The main route I envisioned was to keep out of touch with those pretenses of theirs, only observing from outside. That would have been the best outcome. Now that it has come to this, the best bet would probably be to let it die down with time. And so these holidays were the best thing to happen. If anything, then everything would eventually cool down over the two months of social isolation. But for now, just comply with the river of delusions I unfortunately entered.
As I sat at my desk once again, as I always did, Elisea showed herself with her mandatory support of Shena. They took a pair of chairs and sat next to my desk without a single word. I finished the sentence I was writing in a notebook before i turned to them:
"Well, what is the matter that you show up once more?"
Elisea twisted her hair, seemingly a bit uncomfortable in the chair she took. Why? Probably because the start of the conversation didn't begin as imagined. She was already doing this for a couple weeks, from that day of the school market. She fidgeted a little in her chair:
"Does there have to be a reason for wanting to talk?"
"There is always a reason, the thing is if you admit the reason or you keep it to yourself. There's always a reason."
Her eyes darted around a little, looking annoyed, probably at my responses. Shena on the other hand was just watching, as if this was some reality show. At this moment, all I wished for was to be in her place: watching.
"Hmm, then I can't tell you the reason, because I myself don't know it"
She smirked with that reply. As if she'd said something smart to get me to her side. But that was rather convenient for me.
"Alright, that can be a possibility too. But then, if the reason for the conversation you want is unknown, then what do you exactly want to talk about?"
This caught her off guard, of course.
"Uh, does there need to be a specific topic to talk about? I've seen people just chatting and talking about all sorts of things, and also just plain ones like how the weather is or what they did yesterday or something like that. It doesn't need to be specific, Kahemi!"
This was making it harder than anticipated. The primary plan was to shut her down politely with logic but this persistence kept pushing that very plan further and further back. I guessed that the best choice was to comply with her demands to the conversation and let it fade out after a bit of time.
"So, what did you do yesterday?"
Her eyes sparkled, lighting up with excitement, likely because she won over the crushing logic I've given her.
"So I went to the arcade yesterday and played some dancing games, and it was fun! That was the first time I actually went there this year, and it's May! And after that, I had a smoothie at a nearby Starbucks. It was a fun afternoon. And school sucked yesterday just like it sucks today. Have you seen the homework? Geez, I think they don't want us to be happy in life, they are so…"
This stirred up my thoughts. Elisea was wrong, the professors were just preparing one for life after the period of sunshine and rainbows. They were also partially incorrect about mostly social life and similar topics. The problem wasn't them being vindictive whatsoever, it was just an effort to brace us, their students for the harsh realities in this world. It's their job. And because they did their job, I now could appreciate their work. … The years before… I couldn't remember it all. It was a mess, almost as if those memories layered themselves in a five-centimeter shell of smoke. I guessed it didn't matter. It was the past after all.
"... and that's why I actually try studying chemistry but not biology. Huh Kahemi, you've been staring, what's up?"
I shook my head, setting my mind straight
"Ah yes, nothing, I just thought of something. And Shena, what did you do yesterday?"
Shena looked a bit startled but replied calmly: "I was with Elisea."
And that's how it ended.
On my way home, I saw that cat again. It was definitely the one I rescued from the container on the sidewalk. It came up to me and snuggled against my leg, purring with appreciation. This did make me crack a smile. Animals aren't as complicated as humans, are they? If an animal loves you or at least likes you enough to tolerate you in their closest area, then they will show you so. It's not sugarcoated in anything, disapproval is expressed by negative reactions and approval with affectionate reactions. Straightforward, nothing to complicate that all. I took it in my arms with a slight smile:
"You would be nice as a roommate. Clean, cute and comforting. But best of all, honest. I think I'll take you."
It's satisfied purring resonated with my ambitions. It seemed that it approved my decision.
As I took it in my arms, I walked further towards my apartment. On my way, I saw that man standing again at the café like last time. This time he seemed calm, too calm standing there at the window. So calm that it seemed to cover his nervousness. As he turned, we locked eyes. Even from the other side of the road, I could sense his piercing gaze. But he smiled and walked off. Strangely enough, a few seconds later, it was almost as if he disappeared. He, just like the soul reaper.
At my apartment, the cat jumped onto my bed. It seemed as if it was loving this new warmth and comfort. When I sat down at the table, it came crawling onto my lap and fell asleep there. Ah, such bliss! This really was the pinnacle on earth. I haven't had such bliss in a long time. When was the last time, oh when was the last time I felt such bliss...