Leila's POV
The incident at school that led to my drinking and eventual blackout was something I managed to tuck away into the dark recesses of my mind. I failed to mention it to my friends and if they knew about it the gave me the respect of feigning ignorance, some things in life are best kept secret, even from family. When they asked about my weird behavior, I played it off, trying hard not to arouse suspicion.
Luckily, my friends didn't push it they seemed to be treating me almost delicately like I was this fragile thing that was easily broken. They accepted my clumsy excuse and went on to talk about other things, sometimes including me, but I kept answering offhandedly. My mind was elsewhere, churning over a million different thoughts. Nancy and Diana had a lot of fun, sometimes dangerous fun, and their favorite mantra was, "We only live once." They loved living life on the edge—something the sensible side of me hated, but that little rebellious streak in me couldn't help but enjoy.
The fact that the events happened on a Friday was a relief. I could hide away at home for three days, wearing oblivion like a protective cloak. Nancy and Diana had already decided to spend the night, and though I would have loved to be alone, having friends over was fun too.
All too soon, the three-day holiday was over, and I had to go back to school. I needed to face the consequences of my decision—the consequence of breaking the rule I had used to survive this personal hell called school for two years.
The thought of going back made me break out in goosebumps. Silently, I prayed for a miracle, something bigger than my tiny mistake that would pop up and completely conceal my error. But it wasn't as easy as that.
The worry, the picking at my food, and the intense workout routine, courtesy of my friends, along with the Orlistat, had caused me to lose a considerable amount of weight almost effortlessly.
On the day I dreaded the most—accursed Monday morning—I wanted nothing more than to wear black trousers and a hoodie, something to help me disappear. But my friends, completely oblivious to the problem I had caused at school, chose a "notice me" red gown, insisting that I let my hair down and complete the look with flawless makeup.
We strolled into school that Monday, looking really cool. For the first time, everyone turned to stare. At first, it was a look of admiration, but then the whispers started, and my secrets were exposed.
"Isn't that the girl who snuck into the guys' locker room to confess to Max?"
"Yes, she is. I can't believe she can still walk in here after trying to steal Pamela's boyfriend."
"Well, she did sneak into the guys' locker room, so she's capable of anything."
"Wow, she has the guts to attract more attention after what she did. Maybe her friends are still hanging with her because she didn't mention what a slut she was. I heard she even sucked off all the guys naked."
After the humiliation on Friday, I would have rather transferred to another school than spend another moment here. But here I was.
The accusations and rumors flew back and forth. Neither Diana nor Nancy said a word to either defend or accuse me. The only consolation was that they still stuck by me, even though I had brought them into this terrible limelight.
Taking a deep breath, I turned to face them. "You don't have to stay by me, you know that, right?"
Diana frowned, looking up at me. "It's not that we're embarrassed or anything. We're just hurt that you kept something of such magnitude to yourself, and you lied to us. You're supposed to be our best friend. Yes, we mentioned you asking Max out, but if you had told us, we would have planned it so that there wouldn't have been so much scandal."
Nancy joined in, shaking her head. "We won't abandon you, but that doesn't mean you didn't mess up, Leila. I'm so disappointed in you, but at least you got us the attention we needed for the next phase of the plan."
"I'm sorry," I replied demurely, hanging my head in shame, completely missing the wicked, triumphant smiles on both my friends' faces.
As if on cue, my archenemy waltzed in with her crew. "Well, well, well, if it isn't the boyfriend thief. So, you have the guts to appear before me after attempting to steal my boyfriend. And nope, you're too pathetic to even achieve such a feat."
"I'm sorry, like I said earlier," I answered back quietly, trying to keep my voice steady. "Had I known he was yours, I wouldn't have gone near him."
"Alright, I've had enough of this bullshit!" Nancy shouted, cutting me off and also cutting off whatever Pamela was about to say.
"She didn't even steal your boyfriend, so stop getting mad and feeling unnecessarily insecure, lashing out at an innocent girl. Maybe you should spend more time with your boyfriend, learning how to keep him by your side if he means so much to you, instead of going around barking like a wild dog."
"Quote me—men hate wild dogs. Let's go, Leila," she said, and we flounced off, leaving Pamela speechless.
For the first time, Pamela was left gaping with rage.
As we walked away, my heart pounded in my chest. I felt like I was floating between two worlds—the world where I was still the timid, scared girl who wanted to disappear, and the world where I was someone who could stand up to the likes of Pamela. But was it really me standing up to her, or was it Nancy and Diana pulling the strings?
The rest of the day was a blur of stares and whispers. I could feel the eyes of everyone at school on me, but I tried to block them out, focusing instead on the company of my friends.
We spent the rest of the day plotting and planning, talking about our next steps, as if nothing had happened. I could see the excitement in Nancy and Diana's eyes, their desire to take down Pamela and claim the crown for themselves. But as for me, I wasn't sure what I wanted anymore. Part of me wanted to just disappear, to be invisible again. But another part of me, a darker part, was starting to enjoy the attention, starting to crave the power that came with it.
That night, as I lay in bed, I replayed the day's events over and over in my head. What had I become? Was I really turning into someone like Nancy and Diana, someone who thrived on chaos and manipulation? Or was this just a temporary phase, a way of coping with the pain and humiliation I had endured for so long?
I didn't have any answers, only more questions. But one thing was clear—I couldn't go back to the way things were before. Whether I liked it or not, I had crossed a line, and there was no turning back.
The next morning, I woke up with a sense of dread gnawing at my insides. I knew I had to face the consequences of my actions, but I wasn't sure if I was strong enough to do it. I wasn't sure if I was ready to face Pamela again, or the rest of the school for that matter.
But when I got to school, something strange happened. Instead of the usual whispers and glares, I was met with a kind of wary respect. People were still talking, of course, but there was a different tone to their voices, a hint of fear mixed with the gossip.
Nancy and Diana were waiting for me by my locker, as usual, their expressions unreadable. But when I approached them, they both broke into smiles.
"You did good yesterday," Nancy said, clapping me on the back. "You stood up to Pamela, and you didn't back down. I'm proud of you."
Diana nodded in agreement. "You're one of us now, Leila. You're stronger than you think."
I didn't know what to say, so I just nodded, forcing a smile. But inside, I felt a storm brewing. I wasn't sure if I liked the person I was becoming, but at the same time, I couldn't deny the thrill that came with it.
As the day went on, I started to notice a shift in the way people treated me. I wasn't the invisible girl anymore. People were starting to notice me, starting to respect me. But with that respect came fear, and with that fear came isolation.
I found myself drifting away from my old self, the part of me that just wanted to be liked and accepted. Now, I was someone different, someone who thrived on the power that came with fear and respect.
But as I lay in bed that night, staring up at the ceiling, I couldn't shake the feeling that I was losing something important. I was gaining power, yes, but at what cost? Was I losing myself in the process?
The questions swirled around in my mind, keeping me awake long into the night. I didn't have any answers, only more doubts and fears.
But one thing was clear—I was on a path I couldn't turn back from. Whether I liked it or not, I was in too deep, and the only way out was to keep going forward, no matter where it led me, i was sick of being weak and easily manipulated .