Entering his room, Tyler locks the door and heads straight to the bathroom. He stands in front of the mirror, staring at his reflection in disbelief.
His mind is a whirlwind of questions, spiraling so fast he can hardly catch one before another slips through his grasp.
"Why? Why am I feeling like this? It's not like I'm gay! I was just... ju... having fun. Somehow, I wanted to punish him for being so rude about my sister's picture, but what is happening now?!"
He grips the edge of the sink, his knuckles white. His voice lowers as if afraid someone might hear, even though he's alone. "Why does it feel like I'm jealous of my sister because Tanner thinks she's the one who's been talking to him all this time? Why am I suddenly hoping he knows the truth, that it's me—and for some reason, he forgives me, and maybe we could be toge..."
He stops mid-thought, shaking his head furiously as another question barges into his mind. "Do I really want to be with a man romantically?" he whispers, his voice trembling.
"I'm not gay, nor bisexual. If I were, I'd have known by now! At 21 years old, how can I be so clueless about my sexuality? But if I'm not bisexual or gay, then why did my body react like that to his simple touch? Why did my heart race when I was standing there with him, alone, in a locked room?"
He presses his palm against his chest as if trying to calm the erratic pounding of his heart. He feels the ghost of Tanner's touch lingering on his skin, warm and maddening. His gaze falls back to the mirror, and his face flushes crimson at the memory of his traitorous eyes trailing to Tanner's lips.
"What was I thinking? Why couldn't I look away?" His voice rises slightly before he shakes his head, trying to scatter the thoughts clinging to him like a fever.
"He's completely changed me," Tyler mutters, his voice heavy with realization. "Before we even met, he made me someone else. I've forgotten about my friends, my girlfriend—I hardly go out to party anymore. I don't even flirt with girls like I used to. I thought about him all day. Texting him was my highlight, and it made me smile. Why didn't I realize this before?"
He steps back into his room, exhales sharply, and sits on the edge of his bed. The truth crashes down on him like a wave, leaving him breathless. "I love him," he chuckles bitterly, the sound hollow. "I catfished a man I ended up loving for real. And it turns out he's truly in love with my sister's pictures. He even claimed to love her more after meeting her. Karma, isn't it?"
The words hang heavy in the air, raw and unsteady. His shoulders sag under the weight of the realization, but his resolve hardens just as quickly.
He lifts his chin, his vulnerability replaced by a mask of determination. "No one gets to know about this. Not my sister, and especially not Tanner. It's better this way," he murmurs, as though speaking the words aloud will make them easier to bear.
He tucks the secret deep into his heart, locking it away where it can't escape—where it's safe, even from himself.
Lying in bed, staring into the darkness, sleep completely abandons him. Each time he closes his eyes, his mind replays the memories.
"Tyler, are you up? Breakfast is ready; we're just waiting for you."
The voice snaps him out of his trance. Realizing it's already morning and he hasn't slept a wink, he groans, feeling tormented.
"Just a minute," he replies, wincing at how hoarse his voice sounds.
Dragging himself out of bed, he stumbles into the bathroom. One look in the mirror, and he curses under his breath. "Holy crap!" His eyes are swollen, dark circles etched beneath them.
"I can't go down there like this," he mutters. "They'll all stare at me and ask, 'Are you okay?' When they can clearly see I'm not. I'm in hell. How can someone in hell be okay?"
He opens his bedside drawer, rummaging around for something. "Ahh, this will do," he says, pulling out a pair of sunglasses. He puts them on and examines his reflection. "Perfect," he nods, smirking to himself.
He heads downstairs, forcing his usual cheerful demeanor. "Good morning, fam! It's really great to see you all on this beautiful new day."
He kisses his mom's cheek, then the nanny's, and finally Tayler's. To his surprise, Tayler doesn't push him away like she usually does. Back then, she'd swat him off, but Tyler never gave up until he succeeded.
He taps his father's shoulder. "Hey, Dad."
"Hey, buddy. Can you at least save the nanny a trip to your room every morning?" his father replies, but Tyler barely hears him.
"Good morning, Tanner. Nice to see you again," he says sarcastically.
"You too, Tyler," Tanner replies. His calm voice makes Tyler's body tense, as though the words need to be carefully digested.
"What's with the sunglasses in the house?" Rachael asks, eyeing Tyler suspiciously.
"Mom, I bought them myself. They're mine. I can wear them whenever I want, mom," Tyler says.
"Alright alright." Rachael says raising her hands in surrender.
Tyler grins at that, turning to Tanner. "Hey, Mr. CEO, why are you always dressed in black from head to toe? I must say, you have a very bad taste in clothes."
Tanner smirks. "I know, right? But I can't help it. It's just me—something like nature."
Tyler hesitates. "I was just kidding about the bad taste. It suits you perfectly." He regrets the words immediately and feels the need to cover them up. "I'm just trying to get to know you. I mean, it's nice having you around since you're like my big brother now."
Stop talking, you idiot. You're going to say something stupid, Tyler scolds himself silently.
Tanner chuckles. "You flatter me. By the way, Tayler offered to show me around. Do you want to join us?"
"Why would I want to join you?" Tyler asks, his voice laced with confusion and surprise.
Tanner shrugs. "Why not? Didn't you say you're trying to get to know me better? Well, I want to know you better too. So we can get along, little brother."
TAyler's eyes scream, Please don't come! Tyler catches the message loud and clear, though he hadn't planned to go anyway.
"I'll skip it. Thanks, though. I'm meeting my girlfriend this morning, so I won't be able to join you," Tyler lies smoothly.
"You have a girlfriend?" Tanner asks, almost surprised.
"Yeah. Why? Don't I look like someone who can have a girlfriend?" Tyler replies sarcastically.
"Of course. Just trying to know you better, little brother."
"Cool. I'll ask her to join us for dinner tonight so I can introduce her to you."
"Sure, why not," Tanner replies, his smirk never fading.
Despite their casual exchange, the tension between them is palpable, and everyone at the table can sense it.