I HAVE BEEN HERE FOR TWO MONTHS AND TWENTY DAYS AND I HATE IT. IT STINKS SO BAD AND THERE IS A HUGE DISPLAY OF CLASSISM, NO ONE IS REALLY 'OWNED' BUT YOU HAVE TO WORK LIKE A DOG TO GET A LOAF OF THERA[BREAD]. I DON'T KNOW WHAT I EXPECTED BUT NOT THIS , YOU ONLY SEE RICH PEOPLE WHEN THEY WALK DOWN THE STREETS WITH THEIR NOSES IN THE AIR , CARRIED ON THE SHOULDERS OF MEN AND WOMEN THAT ARE WEAK AND MALNOURISHED , STRENGTHENED ONLY BY THEIR HUNGER AND NEED TO FEED.
I GOT HERE ON THE WEEK OF MUD, WHICH I LEARNED WAS A CELEBRATED WEEK WERE EVERYONE COVERED THEMSELVES IN MUD UNNOTICABLE TO ANOTHER , THE ONLY WEEK OF THE YEAR WHERE THE POOR LOCALS WEREN'T LOOKED DOWN UPON , THERE WAS NO HATE IN THE HEART OF THE POOR AND NO HINT OF DISGUST IN THE VOICE OF THE RICH. THE ONLY TIME IN THE YEAR WHERE EVERYONE WAS TRULY EQUAL AND EVERYONE SHARED EVERYTHING AND BECAME FRIENDS ONLY FOR A WEEK.
I FOR ONE MADE FRIENDS WITH A BOY WHO HAD A WEALTHY MERCHANT FOR A FATHER WHO WAS ACTUALLY AN ACQUAINTANCE OF THE KING that is what he said . I DONT KNOW IF I SHOULD HAVE BELIEVED THAT STORY OR NOT BUT WHAT I DO KNOW IS I AM THANKFUL THAT I MET HIM AT THE TIME I DID, WELL.... I HAVE NOT SEEN HIM SINCE THE SEVENTH DAY CLOCKED MIDNIGHT BUT I REMEMBER HOW KIND HE WAS, BUYING ME FOOD AND TEACHING ME ABOUT HIS CULTURE. IT WAS MY LUCK THAT I FOUND SOMEONE NICE TO HELP ME ON MY FIRST WEEK .
BUT THE WEEK OF MUD WAS WEEKS AGO AND MY REALITY WAS SOMETHING I NEVER IMAGINED I WOULD EXPERIENCE . I WAS A PRINCESS BUT NOW I AM A MAID TO A WOMAN WHO LETS ME STAY IN A RAT INFESTED ROOM AND FEEDS ME ONCE A DAY WHILE I SCRUB HER FLOORS AND RUN ERRANDS FOR HER ALL DAY.
WHAT MATTERS IS I AM NOT HOMELESS AND SHE RARELY ASKED ME WHERE I CAME FROM , SHE WOULD QUESTION MY ACCENT WHICH THROW MY DISGUISE OFF , SHE WOULD QUESTION HOW I KNEW GREETING AND DINING COURTESY SINCE THAT KNOWLEDGE HAD ONLY BEEN RESERVED FOR THE PROMINENT.
SHE WOULD ALSO ASK HOW I COULD READ BOOKS IF I DIDN'T HAVE AN EDUCATION AND WHY MY CLOTHES LOOKED BETTER THAN THAT OF MOST COMMONERS AND I WOULD TELL HER LIES UPON LIES ATTEMPTING TO COVER MY TRACKS AND SHE WOULD NOD LIKE SHE BELIEVED ME BUT I KNEW SHE DIDNT , THERE WAS NO WAY, I DIDNT EVEN BELIEVE MYSELF . HOWEVER, I WAS THE ONLY ONE THE WOMAN TRUSTED WITH HER LIFE, WITH THINGS SHE WOULD NEVER TELL THE OTHER MAIDS AND THEY HATED ME FOR THIS, THEY WERE CURIOUS ABOUT ME AND SINCE I WOULD NEVER ANSWER ALL THEIR QUESTIONS, THEY RESENTED ME. THE PARTIALITY , THE FACT THAT I ATE IN THE SAME MAYI [TRAY] AS SHE DID EVEN THOUGH THEY HAD BEEN THERE LONGER THAN I HAD.
BUT ALL THIS ARE UNIMPORTANT , I HAVE TO FIND THE SCROLL WHICH IS TWO THOUSAND MILES AWAY IN A LAND CALLED MAISEI WHICH I HAVE BEEN TOLD BY THE WOMAN DURING ONE OF THE STORIES SHE TOLD ME WHILE I WASHED HER FEET, SHE SAID IT IS WASTE LAND waste land? I have been risking my life for land waste, what if it wasn't buried there and I do all this for nothing.
I NEED MONEY , MONEY .
THERE IS A FRIEND OF THE WOMAN WHO COMES BY ONCE A WEEK , SHE ONCE TOLD ME SHE WAS BETHROTHED TO HIM AS A MAIDEN BUT NEVER GOT TO MARRY HIM AND BECAUSE OF THAT SHE NEVER MARRIED AGAIN BUT HE ALWAYS CAME TO VISIT AFTER HIS TRIPS. I wished I asked her why she never married but its always better to appear as the quiet girl, always willing to listen to your secrets without judging. MAYBE THIS WAS WHY THE MAIDS THOUGHT THEY COULD PUT POISON IN MY FOOD AND I WOULDN'T FIND OUT, LIKE I WOULD TRUST A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ALWAYS TRIED TO GET ME IN TROUBLE. LIKE DIDN'T HAVE TO BE MORE CAREFUL IN MY OWN HOME.
THE FRIEND OF WOMAN HAS COME TODAY AND HE LOOKS EXACTLY AS SHE TOLD ME , HE ALSO FIT A DIFFERENT DESCRIPTION. HE WAS TALL, SKIN LIKE EBONY, TEETH AS BRIGHT AS THE AFTERNOON SUN, HE STANDS LIKE HE OWNS THE WORLD BUT WALKS SO GENTLY.
HE LOOKED AT HER SO GENTLY , I TRIED TO WALK AWAY BUT SHE CALLED ME BACK "STAND STILL ZARIAH,LISTEN". I DO NOT KNOW WHY SHE ALWAYS ASKED ME TO STAY AND WHAT I WAS TO LEARN BUT I LISTENED NEVERTHELESS TO THEM TALK OF A PLACE WHERE THE SKY WAS PAINTED WITH CLASHING COLOURS MORE BEAUTIFUL THAN YOU COULD IMAGINE , THEY TALKED OF A GOLDEN STINGRAY THAT COULD JUMP REALLY HIGH AND SHOW SAILORS DIRECTIONS BUT IT WAS SO RARE MANY CONSIDERED IT A MYTH I would too if someone told me of a jumping stingray, BUT WHAT DREW MY ATTENTION IN THEIR CONVERSATION WAS THE GRAVE THE MAN SAID EXISTED NOT BECAUSE PEOPLE WERE BURIED THERE BUT BECAUSE PEOPLE THOUGHT TO BE DEAD LIVED THERE , ESCAPEES FROM DIFFERENT KINGDOMS , RUNNING FROM FAMILIES OR DEBTS OR BOUNTY'S PLACED ON THEIR HEADS.
'COULD MY FAMILY?'I STARTED TO DAYDREAM BUT HOW COULD I .
THE CONVERSATION ENDED ABRUPTLY, IT WAS ALWAYS LIKE THIS, NO CLUE WHY BUT THEY ALWAYS STOPPED TALKING LIKE SOMEONE THEY DIDN'T WANT TO OVERHEAR HAD COME .
HE STOOD UP TO LEAVE , GRASPING UNTO HER HAND LIKE AN ANCHOR , THERE WAS NO EXPRESSION ON HER FACE BUT IN HER EYES , I COULD TELL SHE FELT SOMETHING FOR HIM. HE TURNED AWAY TO LEAVE AND AT THE DOOR HE STOPPED, TURNING TO ME, nooo why? i had heard of madams selling their maids to men [illegally] but nothing was illegal here , no one would even know.
"HEY YOU. YOU NEED A FRIEND, COME TO MY KHUSAN[HOUSE]. I HAVE A BOY. YOUR LADY APPROVES" HE SAID .when did she say that , i was here the whole time , BUT I COULDN'T SAY THAT SO I LOOKED MY LADY IN THE FACE AND NODDED AN ANSWER.
HE WALKED AWAY, NO SERVANT IN SIGHT, NO HELPER, LIKE A MAN WHO KNEW HE WAS UNTOUCHABLE.
I HAVE A BOY HE SAID . WHAT BOY.