I curled myself up while bawling like a 5 year old. I've been so scared for so long. I was scared, angry and sad. But I bottled up those emotions. Everything I've been holding up to now, was run free, as if a invisible dam broke and all those emotions pored out from my eyes in the shape of tears.
My eyes were blurry from tears and I couldn't see how Theodore's face looked when he approached me. But at that moment, all that I wanted was everyone and everything to leave me alone. His gentle hands tried to reach my back, I guess he was trying to pat me, but I swat away his hand.
Stay away from me!
Letici—
No! Don't call me that! I am not Leticia. I don't even know who she is! So why does everyone keep punishing me in her name? Huh? It's not my fault that everyone is mistaking me for her. I know those people are sad, but why do they need to punish! Me! I can't take it anymore!
I tugged at my hair so hard that it started to hurt.
Don't, please don't hurt yourself! His gentle yet raspy voice trembled a bit while saying. Was he crying too?
Ha ha ha ha ha, I laughed like a maniac at the request. Me, hurting myself? It's you people! Who are hurting me! Do you know for how long I've been getting these nightmares? Do you know how many times I tried to end everything only so that I could finally free myself from all this? I kept thinking that I've gone mad, I avoided going outside so that people don't think I am crazy if I suddenly see something I shouldn't have ever seen. And after a long time, and when I finally mustered up enough courage to take a train and come home, I was welcomed with another damn nightmare which felt so real that I… felt scared…
Yet, I still wanted to come here, to the club, for a change, but here too… they didn't leave me here… Maybe it's my punishment for going out, yes it's that! I have indeed gone crazy!
No leti— Theodore tried to say something but the darkness started to subside, and soon we were back in the club. I saw Claire running around, frantically searching for me, I guess she was worried sick when I just disappeared into thin air. Claire! I called out her name while waving my hand and motioning her to come where I stood. She came running and out of breath. Tears welled up in her eyes from fear and worry. She hugged me so tight that I felt suffocated.
Then… her eyes landed in Theodore, but rather than a sarcastic remark about me and Theodore making out, she looked him right in the eyes, with a disgusted and angry gaze. Let's go " Oleander"! She stretched my name a bit longer than it should be as if trying to give some signal to Theodore. Does she know him? What else is there that I don't know about yet?....
Claire's pov
I still remember the night clearly when she first starting to have those damned nightmares. She screamed in her sleep, and when she woke up, she was dazed as if she was not even here.
The nightmare she had last night, was nothing like the others. Even though she tried to show that nothing was wrong, I could still see the trembles in her hands. She was scared but she didn't want to worry us. I don't like the way she's suffering all by herself. It made my heart clench. When we asked her if she was alright, at that moment she wasn't even listening to us. Her eyes were looking through somewhere else, she was not here, not her mind at least. She looked terrified yet a bit at ease, as if… as if she found something she was finding for a long time… and I am sure that she herself didn't know what her reaction was at that moment.
Oleander is a wonderful person, I am saying this because I've been with her the longest. She is always calm and makes rational decisions. When she left the counter and disappeared in the crowd all of a sudden, I should've followed her right then, but I didn't, because I thought that she would take care of it…. But I never would've imagined that when I meet her again, I'll see her face tear stained, her hair messed up, which was a complete give away of her full blown anger, and her eyes losing their usual happy shine.
I don't know what Theodore and that guy did to her, but I knew I shouldn't have trusted Theodore when he said he will take care of everything...