"…Are you sure it won't just swallow us whole?"
Tony's voice was slightly hoarse, though he managed to maintain his composure. Truly worthy of the name Iron Man!
That is, if you ignored how his legs were trembling slightly—probably just because he'd been standing too long… right?
"I don't eat humans, Lord Kizaru. Lord Orochimaru instructed me to follow your orders."
The massive snake suddenly spoke, its voice surprisingly soft and childlike, resembling that of a young girl. The contrast between its terrifying appearance and gentle voice was strikingly jarring.
"The snake… it can talk?!"
Tony couldn't help but exclaim. By this point, though, he'd figured out that if Kizaru wanted to harm them, he and Yinsen would have been long gone.
"What's so strange about that? Over in Orochimaru's world, even frogs and slugs can talk. If you ever visit my world, you might even see skeletons that can talk."
Kizaru gently placed Tony and Yinsen onto the snake's head. Thankfully, Orochimaru had thought ahead—the snake's head had a crest-like structure that made it easier for them to sit without fear of falling off.
"Hey, isn't there a slightly more normal mode of transportation?"
Tony couldn't help but complain. His heart was still racing, and if he had a heart condition, he might've already dropped dead.
"Oh, there is. There's also a pink women's bicycle you could take turns riding," Kizaru chuckled. He was half-tempted to suggest it just to see Iron Man riding a pink bike.
The snake glided across the ground with incredible speed. Within ten minutes, they could already see smoke rising from a village at the foot of a distant mountain.
"Miss Feathered Serpent, are you interested in a well-paying job? How does fifty thousand dollars a month sound? If that's not enough, we can negotiate…"
In the short time they'd been traveling, Tony had completely overcome his initial fear of the snake and was now enthusiastically trying to recruit it.
You had to admit, Tony had a good eye for talent. No luxury sports car could compare to the flair of riding a 40-meter-long snake.
What's more, the snake—named Feathered Serpent—was incredibly capable. Its scales could withstand close-range automatic rifle fire. Its strength could easily flip a main battle tank. Even its speed rivaled that of most sports cars.
In a pinch, Feathered Serpent could even burrow underground to escape, as long as the ground wasn't solid rock or thick concrete.
It wasn't just an impressive ride but also an exceptional bodyguard. Fifty thousand dollars a month? Tony wouldn't even flinch if the price were several times higher.
"What's a job?"
The snake from Ryuchi Cave tilted its head with interest, curious after listening to Tony's enthusiastic pitch.
Despite its massive size, Feathered Serpent was actually a juvenile snake, born in Ryuchi Cave. Its mental age was roughly equivalent to a six- or seven-year-old human child.
It didn't understand much of what Tony said, but it found the chatter of the two-legged creature amusing.
"Ahem. A job means I'll give you money or other benefits, and in return, you'll follow my orders."
Tony didn't feel the slightest guilt about simplifying the concept of a job for a "child." He was fully focused on recruiting the snake as his bodyguard and ride.
For someone like Tony, who thrived on attention, riding a giant snake into a crowd would be far more exhilarating than publicly declaring, "I am Iron Man."
"No, Lord Orochimaru explicitly ordered me to follow only Lord Kizaru's instructions," Feathered Serpent replied without hesitation, her tone leaving no room for negotiation.
"Hey, Miss, it's the 21st century now. Blind obedience is so outdated! You have the right to decide your own future…"
Unwilling to give up, Tony tried instilling some idea of independence and equality into Feathered Serpent. It was ironic, given that Tony was the textbook definition of a chauvinist who often discarded women like used napkins. Yet here he was, suddenly acting like a champion of progressive ideals.
"Ahem… Tony, just a friendly reminder—Orochimaru is the Fourth Hokage of Konoha Village. Konoha just won the Third Great Ninja War against four equally powerful adversaries after several years of conflict…"
Kizaru, who had been watching Tony's failed attempts to "recruit" Feathered Serpent with amusement, decided it was time to drop some context.
"A village leader? A… chief? Mr. Kizaru, do you know how many senators and congressmen receive donations from Stark Industries? In South America, even a president would need to submit a request weeks in advance to meet one of my regional managers," Tony scoffed.
Though currently stranded and without even a car, Tony firmly believed that once he returned to civilization, he would again become a VIP welcomed by global leaders. Puppet presidents like Afghanistan's didn't even qualify to shine his shoes.
"Konoha has over ten thousand ninjas…" Kizaru replied, his tone as unhurried as ever.
"Pfft. The U.S. military has over a million active troops. It's the most powerful fighting force on Earth!"
Tony sneered. As the primary weapons supplier to the U.S. military, he had every reason to look down on what sounded like a glorified militia. Sure, the idea of a "village" fielding ten thousand fighters was impressive, but Afghanistan had a military of over 100,000 when its government fell. Ten thousand? Child's play.
"Most ninjas are highly trained killing machines…" Kizaru continued calmly, unfazed by Tony's scoffing.
This time, Tony didn't even bother responding. After all, even a three-year-old wielding Stark Industries' weapons could become a "killing machine."
"The weakest of them are called Genin. Any Genin who's been through a war could, with a little training and some basic knowledge of firearms, completely wipe out the group of terrorists who kidnapped you—using assassination techniques alone."
Kizaru didn't even finish speaking before Tony's face turned pale. Over ten thousand assassins, each as lethal as the top-tier killers?
What kind of nightmarish organization was this?
Their enemies had to be aliens, right?
Oh. Right. The ninja world was technically "alien" to Earth. Never mind…
"The elite among them are called Jonin. The weakest Jonin could easily take out dozens of Genin. And the strongest Jonin—like Orochimaru—could casually annihilate a few small countries if there's no superhero around to stop them…"
Kizaru delivered this bombshell with a casual smile.
Sitting atop Feathered Serpent's head, Tony was now calculating his chances of simply running away.
°°°
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