I couldn't get rid of the guilt. It stayed with me all the time, like a shadow I couldn't shake. Every night, I heard Elliot's laugh in my head, that warm sound that had always made everything feel okay. It was the last thing I remembered before everything fell apart. The argument. The look on his face as he walked away. The crash. The moment his life ended.
I couldn't stop blaming myself. I kept thinking that if I had just said something different, or if I hadn't been so stubborn, maybe he would still be here. But he wasn't. And no matter how many times I replayed that moment in my head, I couldn't change it.
The emptiness was unbearable. It felt like there was a hole in my chest, and nothing could fill it. I didn't know how to move on without him.
Then, one night, something inside me snapped. What if there was a way to undo all of this? What if I could bring him back? I knew it sounded crazy. People didn't come back from the dead. But I couldn't get the thought out of my mind. What if there was a way?
And the only person I knew who might know how was Matthias.
Matthias wasn't just our family's butler. He was something... more. There were rumors about him. People said he had powers, that he could do things most people couldn't even imagine. I never fully understood him, but right now, I didn't care about understanding. I just needed to know. I needed answers.
I found him in the study, just like I always did when I needed something. He was sitting by the fireplace, looking at a book, as if he'd been waiting for me.
"You're still torturing yourself over it, aren't you?" Matthias said, without even looking up.
I didn't need to answer. He already knew.
"I need your help," I said, my voice barely above a whisper.
Matthias finally looked at me, his eyes sharp. "You don't know what you're asking, Asher," he said slowly. "Bringing someone back from the dead isn't something anyone should try."
I couldn't stop myself. "I don't care. I just want him back. Tell me how."
Matthias sighed, closing the book in front of him. He studied me for a long time, as if deciding whether or not he should tell me. Then he spoke quietly.
"There is a way. But it's not easy. It's dangerous. And it's unnatural."
I didn't care about any of that. "I'll do whatever it takes."
He looked at me with a strange, almost sad expression. "You should be careful what you wish for. The price is more than you think."
I stared at him, feeling like I couldn't breathe. "What price?"
"There's a way," Matthias said quietly, his voice heavy with caution. "But it's not something you should take lightly. There's a ritual that can bring someone back, but it costs more than just ingredients. It costs a piece of your soul."
My heart raced. "A piece of my soul?"
Matthias nodded slowly, his eyes serious. "For every life you bring back, you lose a part of who you are. Once you give it, it's gone forever."
I didn't even think about it. "I'll do it. I'll pay the price."
Matthias stared at me for a long time, as though he was deciding whether I understood what I was saying. Finally, he gave a small nod.
"The ritual needs three things," he said softly. "The blood of a willing participant, the heart of a beast, and the ashes of something you've loved deeply. Once you have those, we can begin."
I didn't ask any more questions. I didn't care about the details. I just wanted to get started. Matthias gave me a long, heavy look, like he wanted to stop me, but he didn't say anything else. He knew I had already made up my mind.
Over the next few days, I gathered everything I needed. It felt wrong, each step, like I was crossing a line I couldn't come back from, but I kept going. The blood, the heart, the ashes... it was all in place.
When the night arrived, I stood in the study again, surrounded by candles, their flames flickering in a circle around me. Matthias stood in the center, preparing for the ritual. His voice was soft, steady, as his hands moved with purpose. He muttered words I didn't understand, and the air around us felt heavier, almost like time itself was pausing.
Then the pain hit.
At first, it was just pressure, like something was squeezing my chest. But it didn't stop. The pain grew, deeper and sharper. It felt like something was being torn out of me, a piece of me being ripped away, and I couldn't stop it.
I wanted to scream, I wanted to be at the top of my voice, but the pain was too much. I kept thinking of Elliot. This was for him. He was coming back. It would all be worth it.
But as the seconds dragged on, the pain only grew worse. I felt weaker, like a part of me was slipping away, something I would never get back. But I couldn't stop. I wouldn't stop.
Finally, the pain eased. But something inside me felt wrong. Empty.
I looked down at my hands, wondering if I was still the same person. Had I lost too much? But there was no time to dwell on it. Elliot—he was coming back. That was all that mattered.
I had made my choice, I have to admit to it, and take responsibility of what I have chosen.And now, I had to live with it. It is my action, my responsibilities