Author note at the end. Enjoy.
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Alex settled into the rhythm of research, determined to make the most of his limited time. He opened a new tab on Glen's laptop and typed "Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs" into the search bar. "Let's see what I'm missing," he muttered, scrolling through the various articles that popped up.
The pyramid diagram appeared on the screen, with physiological needs at the base: food, water, shelter. "Check, check, and uncertain," he said, jotting down notes. Next came safety needs: personal security, employment, resources. "Definitely need to work on that," he remarked dryly, thinking about the student debt the system oh so lovingly implanted in his head.
With a sigh, he opened his banking app, bracing himself for the reality check. His heart sank as he saw the numbers: $2,000 in his checking account, a stark reminder of his financial situation. He winced at the sight of the $100,000 looming debt for medical school. "Second semester and already drowning," he groaned, rubbing his temples. "And let's not forget the $10,000 credit card limit. Not bad enough."
'The world's system will collapse in 3 weeks anyway, so I could just buy everything I need without the intention of ever paying back the bank.' Alex thought with a grin. 'Thank you, apocalypse.'
Next, he searched for survival tutorials on YouTube. "How to survive in the wild?" he typed in, feeling a mix of excitement and nervousness. A slew of videos appeared, ranging from basic survival skills to advanced wilderness techniques. He clicked on a popular one titled, "10 Essential Survival Skills You Need to Know."
There were a lot of good points the guy in the video made. Such as humans being able to survive without food much longer than without water.
"You need to know how to find clean water," the guy said. "A water filter is crucial." Alex quickly typed "water filter" into his list of supplies. Ignoring the sponsor of the video.
"Looks like I'll need to learn how to make one, too," he added, scribbling notes as the video continued. Before being struck at the idea. There are companies that make water filters for water bottles. Just like the sponsor of the video he was ignoring.
"Okay, sorry about that." Alex muttered before going back to the sponsor section and checking out the code and company website.
Alex clicked through to the company's website, his curiosity piqued. The sleek design boasted various water filtration products, including portable filters that promised to make even the murkiest water drinkable. "Not bad," he muttered, impressed. He quickly jotted down the brand name and product details, already thinking of checking out the competition.
"Alright, Alex, time to prioritize," he said aloud, looking at his growing list. "Water filter, non-perishable food, first aid kit…" He was starting to feel optimistic about his survival plan. "Just need to remember to budget this with my—" He paused, grimacing at the thought of his dwindling funds. Even before his simulation ability, he was a cheap stack.
Just one good Filtered Water Bottle cost around 100$ at the minimum. With a shake of head, he tried something else. Filter systems for houses or apartment buildings. That's when he found what he needed.
"Berkey Canada." The company read. A 6 Liters water filter for 254$. Which was much more reasonable than the water bottle. The only disadvantage to carrying something of that size would be tiring. On the plus side, clean water.
His phone buzzed with a notification, and he glanced at it. It was a reminder about his upcoming tuition payment. "Fantastic," he groaned, tossing the phone aside. "Stupid college fees."
With a sigh, he returned to the survival video, trying to focus on the information rather than his financial woes. The host continued discussing the importance of shelter and fire-making skills. Alex noted everything down, occasionally pausing the video to absorb the tips. And also to research all the tools he would need. A flint thingy to make fire starting easy.
Something called charcoal shirt or whatever to make the job even easier. As the video wrapped up, he felt a strange mix of anxiety and excitement. "I can totally do this," he said, feeling emboldened. "I'm practically a survival expert now."
He decided to take a break and check how much of his meager funds he could allocate for supplies. Returning to his banking app, he opened his account information again. "$2,000, huh? Let's see what I can do with that," he murmured, mentally calculating.
After some quick math, he realized he could comfortably spend a few hundred dollars on essentials without completely emptying his account. "Okay, maybe I can buy a few other things and some food. I'll figure out the rest later," he decided, feeling a sense of urgency.
Emergency food ratios were worth around a thousand dollars for at least five people for a month. The other things on his list were a tent that came with a furnace, fishing rod, and baits for the rod. Not forgetting to include weapons. A good aluminum bat, multi tool knife, and or a machete. He didn't have a permit for guns or know how to use one.
'Oh, a bag to carry all, if not, most. So hikers bag.' Alex thought, writing that down as well.
Alex leaned back in the chair, his mind racing with possibilities. "What else am I missing?" he muttered, tapping his chin thoughtfully as he scanned his notes.
He opened a new tab and began searching for "survival gear essentials." A list of items popped up, and he quickly skimmed through it, nodding at each suggestion. "Rope? Why? Flashlight? Definitely." He started jotting down everything that caught his eye.
"Okay, let's see," he said, adding a few first aid kit to his list. "Gotta patch myself up when I inevitably trip over a zombie or something." He chuckled at the thought but quickly sobered as he remembered his new reality.
With a resigned sigh, he continued to flesh out his list. "Alright, what else do I need?" he asked himself. "And maybe a portable charger? Gotta keep my phone alive for as long as possible—if nothing else, to document my epic survival journey."
But he stopped before writing it down and instead looked at the laptop. "If I can keep it charged, it will continue to run." He muttered, as a plan formed. "And if I download everything on a PDF file, it wont need internet either."
Immediately, he searched if what he was thinking was possible and 10 minutes later, a wicked grin formed on his face. "Laptop, you will be the most treasured thing in the world very soon." Finding wiki offline, he downloaded it on Glen's laptop. 'Mine.' His thoughts corrected him.
From there, Alex searched nearby outdoor supply stores, eager to see what he could eliminate from his list first before buying things through internet. 'I can't count on the items reaching me if I do buy through internet. They might get stuck at a airport, crawling with zom- Walkers.'
After jotting down the addresses, he leaned back, contemplating his next move. "Okay, I've got my list, some cash, and a credit card I will never have to pay back. Let's make this happen." He stood up, stretching and shaking off the anxiety that had been building.
The first store on his list was a small outdoor gear shop just a few blocks away. As he walked, he rehearsed his strategy. "In and out, grab what I need, and stick to the budget," he muttered, mentally calculating how much he could spend.
When he arrived, the bell above the door jingled as he stepped inside. The store was filled with the earthy scent of canvas and the bright colors of various gear. Alex felt a rush of excitement and then nervousness.
He quickly made his way to the camping section, scanning the shelves. "Tent, check. First aid kits, check." He grabbed a few compact first aid kits and inspected a few tents, settling on a lightweight one that seemed easy to set up. It also came with a little furnace kit.
"Not bad," he said to himself, tossing the tent in his cart. With the furnace kit, he didn't need a portable stove, but after a shrug, a stove was added in the cart. As he moved through the aisles, he spotted a section dedicated to self-defense gear. "Okay, time for weapons," he thought, his heart racing.
He found a multi-tool and a machete, both of which felt reassuringly solid in his hands. "Alright, I think I'm set. Just need a decent backpack to be able to carry all this," he muttered to himself, scanning the store for a suitable bag.
After selecting a rugged hiking backpack, he made his way to the checkout. The cashier, a middle-aged man with a friendly smile, scanned his items. "Looks like you're gearing up for camping," he remarked.
Making Alex freeze due to nervousness. Noticing it, the man laughed. "First time?"
"Uh, yeah. Don't know if I got everything though." Alex answered, staring at the man scanning everything.
"If you don't mind me asking, where to?" The cashier asked, almost finishing.
"Haven't decided yet. But end goal would probably be like the wilds in Alaska?" Alex answered unsurely. Finishing the scan, the man "hmmed" in thought while Alex took his credit card and paid for the items.
"That's pretty bold for a first time. Especially in the cold." The man replied, watching as the young man nodded absently. "Right, September…" He muttered. "That's why, I was thinking of going to the closest national park and get some experience there." Alex continued.
"Ah yeah, that's a better plan. You got something for starting fire?" He asked and watched as Alex darted back to the aisle. "The second one from the left." The man chuckled. Coming back with a flint, Alex muttered an embarrassed thank you.
The cashier bagged Alex's items inside the hiker's bag and handed them over with a knowing smile. "Just remember, it's all about preparation. You'll do fine as long as you plan ahead. And remember to have fun." he said, offering a final piece of advice.
"Thanks, I appreciate it," Alex replied, feeling a mix of gratitude and guilt. A thought ran inside his head, to warn the man to prep as well. To get out of the city and camp away from it. Yet his feet kept moving, not intending to stop. "Take care." The man bid goodbye after him and Alex stopped.
He needed to at least warn him. He helped him. Or at least had the intention to help him. He turned, opening his mouth to flat out warn him. 'Why even try, he's just a NPC.' The thought came and stopped Alex in his tracks. 'He's just a simulation. Just like Glen. An NPC.' The thought continued at super speed.
He wanted to argue, but knew it was right. "Take care and have a good day." The words escaped his mouth and he turned, walking away, ignoring the thank you the cashier shot back.
Something was brewing in his chest, but he clenched it tightly and made it disappear. He stepped outside, trying his best to not look up to any faces. "Okay, next stop," he murmured, glancing at his list.
The bustling street felt overwhelming as Alex made his way to the next store. He focused on his list, trying to drown out the chaotic thoughts swirling in his mind. "Just focus on getting what you need," he muttered, repeating it like a mantra.
"Alright, let's see what else I can find," he said to himself to distract himself from the numb feeling in his chest as he navigated through the aisles. His eyes darted over the displays, searching for essential items that would fill in the gaps in his survival plan.
He headed toward the fishing section first. 'Fishing gear, here I come,' he thought, scanning the shelves until he spotted a beginner's fishing rod kit. "Perfect," he said, grabbing it along with some bait.
As he continued to browse, he spotted a sturdy flashlight and a multi-pack of batteries. "Definitely need light," he muttered, adding them to his haul.
The remaining runs were more tedious than enjoyable after the first store. After the second store, he went back to the dorm to put everything on his bed, before walking towards the nearest bus stop with his school backpack.
He bought a laptop for himself with his credit card, and a few charging devices that used the sun instead of electricity. Both for the new laptop and his phone. Afterwards, it was emergency food. Thankfully, Alex managed to negotiate with the store owner about shipping. 50$ if they could bring it to his dorm before the end of the day.
When he arrived, he quickly laid everything out on the floor, marveling at the array of gear and supplies he had accumulated. A flash of the cashier's face came to mind, removing everything he was feeling. "This is it," he said, a dry and numb feeling growing inside him. "In 3 week, everything will turn to shit." He muttered to himself, the reality of the situation coming back to him.
He knew this was all a simulation. But just the event of this morning had him rethink the possibility. Heck, he was trying his best to ignore it all this time. Muttering to himself to get the thought out of his head. But... Glen looked like a good guy. And if Alex was honest, he really enjoyed the banter they had going in this morning. But that's exactly where the problem was. Everything felt too real.
That meant, everything that will happen, will feel real as well.
Glen, the exam, the sense of normalcy, everywhere he looked, people seemed real. They were real. And not some NPCs. An extremely heavy pressure dropped on Alex, his chest felt like caving him. Thoughts such as 'should he try to save them' to 'can I save them.' Ran in his brain. His emotions were running wild and he was breathing heavily. Why was he breathing heavily? His chest hurt all of the sudden.
Alex felt the world closing in around him, each breath becoming a laborious task as panic surged through his body. Kneeling on the floor, he pressed his palms against his chest, feeling the rapid thudding of his heart like a drum echoing in an empty room. "What's going on…?" he gasped, the words barely escaping his lips.
Tears blurred his vision, and he squeezed his eyes shut, desperate to block out the chaos swirling in his mind. Flashes of horrific scenarios danced behind his eyelids—people fighting for survival, chaos erupting in the streets, and the desperate cries of those unable to escape the impending doom. The thought of innocent lives caught in the crossfire twisted in his gut, amplifying his fear. All coming back with the question. 'Can I even save them?'
"Panic attack…" he managed to piece together, the realization hitting him like a cold wave. 'Breathe,' he thought, but the words felt foreign. How was he supposed to when everything inside him was screaming for release? He tried to remember what he had read about panic attacks, but the details slipped away like sand through his fingers. His limbs felt weak and felt like they would crumble anytime now.
Gasping for air, he forced himself to focus on something, anything other than the turmoil inside. 'What do I do?' he thought desperately. The room around him felt disoriented, the supplies he had gathered now looming like ominous reminders of his reality. He felt utterly unprepared, like a child playing dress-up in a world that was far too serious. 'I'm an expert' He remembered saying. He would have punched himself if he could.
"Count… count to four," he recalled from a vague memory. "Inhale for four, hold for four, exhale for four." He tried to steady his breathing, but it felt impossible. Each inhale seemed shallow, and every exhale left him feeling more lightheaded.
"Okay, Alex, focus," he commanded himself, trying to visualize the steps. He inhaled deeply, holding the air in his lungs as if it were a lifeline.
One… two… three… four.
He released the breath slowly, trying to let go of the panic but the images kept popping up in his mind. The killings, the lootings, the betrayals, the worst of humanity. 'NOT HELPING!' He shouted to his brain.
"One… two… three… four."
He tried to shut them out. But the counting turned into a blur as thoughts spiraled again. "What if they don't believe me? What if I can't save anyone? What if I'm wrong? What if I die?" The "what ifs" consumed him, suffocating any glimmer of hope.
Another gasp escaped him, and he felt the tears begin to spill over, running down his cheeks. "I can't do this," he whispered, feeling utterly defeated. The pressure in his chest intensified, each heartbeat felt like it was the last and afterwards, it would burst.
In desperation, he punched the floor and pain shot up from his knuckles and jolting his brain. A gasp of hair and he could inhale again, no matter how shallow it was. The images stopped for a moment before coming back.
With hope, Alex punched the floor once more with all his strength. The hit hurt him and the images receded. Another shallow breath. He threw another fist, then another, then another. He kept repeating until he could deeply breath again.
His knuckles throbbed from the impact, but the pain was a very welcome distraction. He gasped again, focusing on the sting that spread through his hand, grounding himself in the physical world. For a fleeting moment, the overwhelming tide of panic receded, and he could think clearly.
"Okay, okay, focus," he muttered to himself, wiping the tears from his cheeks with the back of his hand. He felt a flicker of determination ignite within him. He couldn't let the panic win.
"Breathe," he reminded himself, though it felt like a mantra more than a command. He took another breath, deeper this time, and focused on the sensation of air filling his lungs.
In… one… two… three… four.
Hold… one… two… three… four.
Exhale… one… two… three… four.
He felt the pressure in his chest begin to ease, if only slightly. The world around him started to come into focus again. The scattered supplies on the floor were no longer ominous; they were tools for survival.
"Just keep breathing," he whispered, and the words felt more like a promise than an instruction now. He allowed himself to lean back against the floor, letting the cool surface support him as he continued to focus on his breath.
'It's impossible to save everyone.' He thought and though it almost brought back the panic attack, Alex pushed it away, pushed away his emotions. 'Think logically. Only logically.' He commanded himself.
In… one… two… three… four.
Hold… one… two… three… four.
Exhale… one… two… three… four.
'No matter if its real or not. I can at least warn them.' The thought continued and instantly, ideas sprung. Find some kind of video about the apocalypse. While the government might be keeping a tight lid on it, there's bound to be slip ups. Share those through the social media apps at least. Even printout some pamphlets. He'll do his part and whatever the NPCs did afterwards, it won't be on him.
He'll do his part and make sure he could stare at his reflection in a mirror after it was done.
Gradually, the panic that had gripped him began to dissolve, replaced by a sense of purpose. He could feel the resolve solidifying in his chest. "I can do this," he said aloud, the sound of his own voice reassuring him. "I have to do this."
With renewed determination, Alex pushed himself up from the floor, wincing as he flexed his aching hand. He glanced around the room, taking stock of the supplies laid out before him.
"Alright, let's do this," he said, a fire igniting within him. He grabbed his phone and quickly typed a message to Glen. Who else to start but your best friend:
"Hey, I need to talk to you about something important when your shift is over."
While he waited for a response, he turned his attention to his supplies once more. He began organizing everything methodically, ensuring that he was prepared for whatever might come next. He aligned the fishing gear, first aid kit, and flashlight in a way that made sense. The act of organizing helped him maintain his focus, pushing aside the remnants of panic that still lingered.
Just as he finished, his phone buzzed. Glen's reply appeared:
"Sure."
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Author note:
Okay, this chapter wasn't really that good. The part about the panic attack, I wanted to send the signal to you guys that he wasn't taking his situation seriously previously. Because while this is sort of fiction, it is also "real" with consequences.
The goal of this chapter was to make the mc "WAKE UP TO REALITY" (which is ironic because... well... simulation and all.) that while it is a simulation, his nature as a character, morality, and world views still has impact and hold of him. I don't want him to be a edge lord that will shrug at people dying in front of him or be on the other side of the spectrum with going full murder hobo. I want my mc to have some dept. In DND terms, because i searched it up, I want him to be between the following two:
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Neutral Good, "Benefactor"
A neutral good character does the best that a good person can do. He is devoted to helping others. He works with kings and magistrates but does not feel beholden to them.
Neutral good is the best alignment you can be because it means doing what is good without bias for or against order.
Neutral good can be a dangerous alignment when it advances mediocrity by limiting the actions of the truly capable.
Chaotic Good, "Rebel"
A chaotic good character acts as his conscience directs him with little regard for what others expect of him. He makes his own way, but he's kind and benevolent. He believes in goodness and right but has little use for laws and regulations. He hates it when people try to intimidate others and tell them what to do. He follows his own moral compass, which, although good, may not agree with that of society.
Chaotic good is the best alignment you can be because it combines a good heart with a free spirit.
Chaotic good can be a dangerous alignment when it disrupts the order of society and punishes those who do well for themselves.
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Anyway, I need feedbacks for this chapter because I feel like this chapter has the feeling of "make it or break it" vibe.
Also, what do you think of the system so far? Just like I said, it's something I haven't seen being used. While I dislike system in story, I also understand their point. So, made my own "version" of it. The reason for the implemented memories are to give the mc backstory.
I dropped him without context and all. So, instead of making shit up and have the lies not consistence due to me forgetting things or writing a 10k prologue. This gives me breathing room to drop just one part of his background while still giving context and advancing the story.
Hope you enjoyed.