Path-Walkers were a type of product-testing Dinglebarry—colossal doggos with bottomless appetites used to evaluate new items instead of relying on human assessment. These exceptional creatures didn't appraise products based on trivial criteria like colour or texture, nor did they consider the presence of hair. Instead, they gauged a product's excellence solely based on its detectability.
Within seconds, a Path-Walker would eagerly consume an appealing product; any hesitation signalled that the product failed. A product devoured promptly signified triumph, marking it ready for placement on shelves, destined for human enjoyment, and dressed in luxurious coverings that enhanced its visual appeal.
(•ω•)
"Whoa, it really stinks in here!" Princess Pensée exclaimed, covering her face with a scarf to block the smell.
A random, plump woman stood nearby, wearing a large dress reminiscent of toilet paper roll dolls. She sported oversized 80s glasses and black lipstick, as if she were immune to good fashion sense.
"Why not say it even louder so everyone can hear you?" she said sarcastically. "Young adults these days," she mumbled the rest of the sentence to herself.
Amii Ling and Princess Pensée found themselves amidst a product testing exhibition at 'Slops Ahoy,' with a mission to uncover an exclusive and thrilling new product. Their aim was to position themselves as trailblazers by being the first to try it and share their thoughts on eBunnee. At Slops Ahoy, there were always intriguing food experiments to sample and experience.
Princess Pensée rudely stood up from her seat and bluntly exclaimed, "Ugh, IT REALLY STINKS IN HERE!!"
"Yes! It really does, girl. It stinks like a pug's bad side! She ain't lying, Am-ii-lying!? No, we aren't!" Amii Ling shouted. The incident involving the water and window cleaner noticeably intensified the negative mood of both girls that day.
From a nearby table, a voice chimed in—a blend of nurturing concern and disapproval. "Tsk tsk... I know you two are capable of so much more. My expectations for you were higher. Acting like this won't take you far in life."
Amii Ling and Princess Pensée exchanged glances, both taken aback by the tone and the demoralising words. The voice was oddly familiar—dull, forgettable, and monotone—yet they couldn't quite put their fingernails on it.
As they turned their gaze towards the table a few rows away, a collective groan escaped their lips. "Ugh, Jason! Like we haven't had enough of this fool already today," Princess Pensée complained with an exasperated tone.
"Now he's even intruding on our personal space. Seriously, does he not have anything better to occupy himself with?" Amii's irritation grew.
As they walked towards the tables, Amii's gaze glided disdainfully across the room and landed on him. Her expression twisted as though she had stumbled upon a heap of sewage waste. She drawled, "Could you just, like, go away? School's over, and there's, like, seriously, zero obligation for us to put up with you. Even during school hours, being nice to you is, like, not on the menu; we simply tolerate your existence."
Princess Pensée added her fifty cents at the end, "And seriously, why are you, like, following us? We don't want any more of you than we have already endured!"
Amii finished with a disgusted tone, "Ugh, spare me. I'm about to gag!"
"Ahem," Jason cleared his throat before speaking. "I have been a food critic here for five years and come here weekly. You girls have never been here before. So, by your flawed logic, you are following me."
Jason shook his head disapprovingly. What he said next really stung the two girls. "Hard work and diligence have been crucial parts of my journey towards success. You girls are very, very lost. I hope you find yourselves one day."
Amii was fuming. "'Your journey towards success'? Really?! You fail at everything! You have only 50 followers on eBunnee despite being on there for so many years, and all of them are bots! And you're trying to teach us how to enhance our eBunnee presence when you have absolutely none yourself?! Talk about a teacher who can't practice what they preach."
Pensée nodded in agreement and added, "You're an awful teacher as well! You consistently arrive 10 minutes late or don't show up at all. You don't actually teach us anything; you just shove a piece of paper in our faces and say, 'Read this,' or you tell us to 'create a cake' to earn 5 stars, without offering any guidance or advice on how we should even do this. You just sit there blankly, staring while positioned at your desk. Every student here knows more than you. Even Lillian knows more than you do about anything you teach, and we are not joking!"
Amii relentlessly continued her verbal assault, "And your supposed 'critical' reviews... Oh my God! We've actually come across them! It's a parade of generic, copy-and-paste drivel like, 'Very nice, 5/5,' or simply, 'Recommended!' Your reviews hardly ever stretch beyond three words."
It was as if two twin sisters were sharing the same mind and were in sync with each other. Pensée aptly concluded Amii's barrage with, "What exactly is it that you do? Is your daily routine limited to inadequately teaching people, binge-watching TV, and picking your nose?"
"That's... that's quite a speech there, girls." It was quite evident that he didn't have any retort to anything they said. Out of nervousness, he was about to scratch his nose but resisted after remembering what they had just said and fiddled with his glass of water.
Jason responded, "I can see you ladies are no longer soaking wet from the window cleaner," continuing to fiddle with his glass of water and unsure where to place his gaze.
Amii's tone grew more incredulous: "You actually said that to a couple of girls?! Seriously! What on earth is wrong with you?!" she exclaimed aggressively. "Go ahead, throw that water at me! I couldn't care less about getting wet! Try it! See what happens when I inform my father and have you fired."
"Dear young ladies, or should I say my esteemed prize students, please be assured that I have no intention of making any threats. My sole desire is to proceed with my duties here, and I encourage you all to do the same. I kindly request that you showcase your skills in reviewing products, as you previously expressed. I have every confidence in both of you and your capabilities. Thank you, next."
"'Thank you, next'? Is he treating us like a bad audition or something?"
The two of them were fed up with him. As they walked back to their table, they saw three people sporting nothing but white fox-girl towels. Two women stood beside a tall guy. They didn't seem to get along, but as they passed, they mimicked the pose of the fox-girl on the towel in front of them.
"Oh-em-gee, Amii, that's Cosmic Lunar Vixen! My dad and I used to be, like, obsessed with that show."
"That show isn't just all cute and stuff; it's, like, totally before my time. But seriously, I'm, like, totally vibing with its aesthetics."
"Anyway, how's your dad? It's been, like, forever since I saw him. What's he up to now?" Amii asked.
"He's, like, still swamped with these huge products and contracts to, you know, fulfil."
"Whoa, that's, like, so relatable! My dad is, like, always caught up too! But I guess that's how he gets the cash to, like, buy me whatever I want."
"But seriously, what's the deal with everyone strutting around flaunting those 'Cosmic Lunar Vixen' towels in a public place? I mean, did you see that guy with the hairy legs? He's still parading in that towel, and, like, are they even wearing anything underneath? It's kinda gross, not gonna lie."
Amii shrugged and said, "I guess it's, like, the latest fashion trend or something, you know?" Pensée chimed in with a nod.
Amii was about to plop down at a table right in front of this dude rocking the fox towel, and then Pensée gave her a nudge and said, "Hey, let's grab seats over here instead." She pointed to another table. "I so don't want him in my line of sight, and if he's not gonna sit with his legs crossed, I definitely don't wanna accidentally see anything."
Both girls shared a synchronised "Eww!" before quickly relocating to another table.
Meanwhile, the woman with black lipstick sat next to Jason hurriedly, causing the chair to tilt, crack, and produce a skidding noise against the floor. Well, Jason hoped the skid sounds were from the chair and not the woman. The woman remarked, "Back in my day, honey... teachers actually knew how to do their job."
The woman wasn't visibly consuming any food, yet she continued to produce an unpleasant sound by repeatedly slurping as if she were pulling in flies from the air into her wide-open mouth.
"You... don't know what you're talking about. I could not be prouder of my girls! Both of them are already mega-stars on eBunnee."
While continuing to emit repulsive and consistent slurping noises, the woman shook her head and commented, "They are showing a lack of respect for you and responding with inappropriate language."
"As their teacher, my foremost duty is to propel their success on eBunnee through any means necessary. My methods might be unusual, but they have been tested a lot and always work. Opinions circulating about me carry no real weight. My approach involves deliberately provoking responses by skilfully pushing their buttons and inciting reactions with statements that genuinely inflame their passions. The younger generation on eBunnee is drawn to rebellious attitudes. They are exhibited by figures like Amii and Little Miss Pensée. I am fully aware of what is popular on eBunnee and what the latest trends are. As a teacher, it is my duty to be aware of these trends. Also, every student in my class is doing exceptionally well. This is true for the whole school community too."
Jason studied the woman and already knew what she was about to say next, so he interrupted her before she began. "About the clear lack of engagement on my eBunnee page, I intentionally maintain a decoy page as a façade. I am well aware that students might look at my profile. I aim to motivate them by showing a less successful page. It will inspire them to strive harder to avoid a similar outcome. They don't want to end up with an unsuccessful page like mine. My actual channel has a following of over 9,000."
She sat there and gave Jason the stink eye, and what a very smelly stink eye it was. Jason realised the girls were right; it really did smell in here. Considering this was a food tasting place where they were rating and scoring new products, sitting next to this smelly woman wasn't helping matters. And this woman wasn't even the primary source of the unpleasant smell; she was merely a single contributor to the array of unpleasant odours. It was those imprudent, Path-walking dogs darting around the tables—those foolish dogs they used to test products.
Jason continued, speaking to deaf ears, "Amii Ling and Princess Pensée's fathers hold immense power and influential connections, capable of ending my job, but that's not my focus. I really want them to succeed in the world, and I want the best for them."