Omaha, Nebraska – Hope's office
Monday – March 10th 2059
By the time Hope made it to work today she was in a dreadful mood. She didn't bother to smile; she was long past pretending today. She managed to get started with her emails before she had to deal with another co-worker. After that she was busy dealing with a small crisis in her team before her boss dropped into her office. It was nearly go-time for the project so she was expecting to see him. This project she had sacrificed a lot for. Many late nights and weekends in the office to see this one launch cleanly. She had just managed to deep six her feelings and was just about to be her normal self when her boss came up, with a look on his face she didn't like.
"Look Hope I know you just walked in and all but um… IT just called, we are on hold."
The project she had been working on, the one that was getting her noticed. Had just been put on hold for an unknown amount of time. The "brilliant" minds upstairs had discovered a serious problem that wasn't found in testing and thus had put the entire thing on ice while they called in outside help to deal with it. Hope's thin mask fell the moment he said the news. She didn't even think her response, it was out of her lips before it even crossed her mind.
"Seriously! Doug we were like 10 minutes away from flipping the Goddam switch! Why in hell didn't they find this in testing?"
Her boss's eyebrows went up and he closed the door. She had said that about three levels louder than she had intended. He sat his coffee down on her desk and sat in the open chair. After folding his hands together, he cocked his head and looked at her intently. Internally Hope deflated like a balloon. After taking a few seconds in pausing, he quickly got to the point.
"You want to tell me what is going on?"
She tried her best to make the best of things. Doug didn't need to know, nor would he care about, her love life. Besides that, allowing anything to get in the way of her work, was not going to get her that promotion. Using a well-practiced mask and tone she worked to put things right.
"Doug I apologize, I am just passionate about this. My team has put in a lot of hours. Frankly they deserve to see this thing to the finish line. Its not fair that some other group who didn't do their job is screwing up theirs!"
She knew at once her cover wasn't believed especially when she let her emotions peek again. Doug didn't speak he just gave a little huff. That was his tell to anyone who knew him that he didn't like what he had heard.
"Look Hope, I don't know what has you on edge but you need to calm down. Normally you and IT get along fine, is there something I don't know about?"
Hope had her mask back on and a cheerful and rosy outlook back plastered on her face for her response. But the cat was out of the bag, and Doug wasn't going to fall for platitudes. She didn't even get a chance to respond.
"I noticed you putting in a lot of time after hours lately. And more than one person has commented that you aren't yourself. You missing that call-in because you were in a bar isn't like you Hope. Granted you have every right to go out drinking on a Saturday night. But that isn't like you, I don't know if it's something at home or just the work load but its showing. I have to admit I am concerned."
Hope apologized the best she could and felt sick at the bottom of her stomach. The LAST thing she wanted to do was appear weak to Doug. But the way he took her response told her he wasn't done. He always had this condescending look about him when he thought he was doing you a favor.
"I am not sure how long Murphy and his crew are going to chew on this issue Hope. They say it's at least 10 days, something about a delay with getting a specialist down here from Microsoft. But it could easily go longer. Murphy generally always underestimates things…. you know how he is. Why don't you take some time, you don't have to ask me. Just fill out the card and I will approve it. Take a couple days, or hell take a week. As long as I can pull you back when we need you, that's fine with me."
She smiled for him and thanked him for being understanding. But Hope was firm when she told him she was going to be ok. He didn't believe it for a second and again encouraged her to take the day. She knew her boss, he wouldn't push her past that, and he didn't. But if she blew up again, then he would act. And she knew if Doug acted she wouldn't like it. No promotion would be the least of her problems then.
The rest of the day went smoothly, with the project on the shelf, there wasn't really anything to do. Their normal work had been sidelined because of the project, and they couldn't just pick that back up until IT said they could. She encouraged her team to take the day, that way they would burn their PTO instead of the company's time. But none of them were that stupid to fall for it. All of them were content to pretend to work the rest of the day. One of her reports especially ticked her off when she caught him playing games on his phone for the 2nd time in the day. That was cause enough for her to write him up. The attitude of the guy was just unbelievable! He wasn't her hire, thank goodness. What Helen ever saw in that jerk was beyond Hope.
About the only saving grace for the day was the fact that with little work to do she didn't have to stay late tonight. Once it was clear the rest of her team was gone, Hope left as well. That allowed her an early Gym time and a very small dinner. By the time 8pm rolled around she was sitting in front of the TV trying to forget her day and her terrible mood. The glass of wine helped with that, but nowhere near enough. She thought about texting Gerold and asking him to either come home and talk, or just tell her over text. But she knew the answer to that. She knew her love well, once he made up his mind that was that. She was weighing her options on leaving him when her phone went off again. This time it wasn't a text but a phone call. The fact it rang at all, meant it was a known number. She hurried to see if it was Gerold or even Elsa, but instead it was Doug. The moment she answered she knew it couldn't be good.
"I told you to take it easy. Instead, I see you wrote up Greg for playing on his phone. I seem to remember telling you to encourage your people to take time."
Hope knew at once she was cooked. She would be lucky to get away from this with just a verbal.
"Sir I did, but my people arent idiot's. Maybe if IT had given us a bit more warning I could have had something put aside for them to do."
That bit about Greg was probably what he was sore over. But she had tried to sidestep that to get him to forget. Not that it had a chance of working, but on some bosses it did.
"Hope, it's not IT's fault, things like this happen. A good manager has alternatives queued up for things just like this. Did Greg do anything other than what you wrote him up for?"
She was about to go over her laundry list of things she hated about the guy but her boss didn't even give her the oxygen to explain.
"Honestly I am confused as to your reasoning. Hope that wasn't the kind of response I would expect out of you. It feels like you are jumping to extremes here. First with IT, next with Greg."
Hope explained that she had to maintain discipline and that Greg liked to flaunt her authority a lot. While that was true enough, it wasn't so bad that she "had" to write him up over it. There was a small pause from Doug and that told her more than his words how he felt. The huff started up again and Hope had to suppress her own anger over it. It was her team, or it was supposed to be anyway. He deserved the write up, why all the second guessing of her actions?
"Hope I am going to file vacation for you. Five days to be exact, staring in the morning. I don't want to see you until Tuesday of next week, do you hear me?"
Hope then asked about Greg, she figured Greg was going to be insufferable now after having her semi-suspended over this. The amount of respect she was going to lose in her team was immeasurable. Doug's response stopped her breathing.
"I fired him, it was his second written offense, you may have forgotten but that's company policy. Security will let him know in the morning when he shows up. As for you, I don't want to see you Hope, not till next week."
Doug didn't wait for a response and hung up, stunned Hope just sat there looking at her phone. She didn't want Greg fired, just put in his place was all. Hope tried to tell herself it wasn't her fault but the way Doug described it, he wasn't blaming Greg. He blamed her, but why? Hoped pulled her legs into herself and cuddled under the blanket but left the TV on pause. The quiet of the room was sort of damning to her. What was she supposed to do, praise the jerk for being lazy? But then again she didn't really have to write him up did she? She could have just said something to him, or made fun of him in front of the others. Why did she push it all the way to write up, and that was when she realized why Doug was angry. She did it because of her own issues. She let her frustrations over Gerold, seep into her work life. Greg was an ass yes, but he was passable at work. In the quiet of the moment however she had to admit she was glad Greg was gone. Now she could hire someone who fit better in her team. It didn't have to be a woman but it would be nice if it was. Someone who didn't look at her automatically and think her weak.
Hope felt unsure of her herself, she felt lost. She considered just starting up the TV and getting a measure of peace by losing herself into a silly show. Instead, she sat there huddled and pondered her situation. Hope's mind nearly always raced when she was awake. She just couldn't put it in neutral unless it was engaged with something. But when she was introspective and upset it would get very quiet. Between the quiet room and her quiet mind, she felt keenly her mistake. This mess at work made it crystal clear to Hope that it was time to get her life in order. She couldn't go on like this, if she didn't, she could lose everything.
She loved Gerold and wanted this relationship to work. But the fact was, not knowing was eating her up from inside. If this thing was as bad as Gerold hinted, she may not want to be with him anymore. If that was the case then she had a right to know. It wasn't fair to her to make her wait half a year just to learn it wasn't to be with Gerold. And Elsa had deceived her, that much was now certain. Elsa should have told her from the start. She didn't have a right to keep that secret from her, AND try to make them a couple. It wasn't fair to anyone, and if she couldn't get Gerold to talk, then her next step was obvious.
Hope got up from the couch and went to the shower to clear her mind. As the warm water hit her body, her muscles relaxed and she paused to let her mind clear. It was a mental process she had used all her life when she was vexed. Approaching a problem after clearing her mind and calming her body. More than once, she had allowed her emotions to get the best of her and she wasn't going to go there here if she could help it. About five minutes into the shower her path became clear and she made her decision. One way or the other she was going to know the truth. Then she could decide what to do.