I was walking on a road that seemed endless, it seemed like every ounce of hope that I used to have was just like sand slipping through my fingers. I felt exhausted, but I still continued to walk on and on to find a destination that didn't exist. Maybe death was what I was awaiting.
I looked for a vehicle to just come in front of it and die, but no such thing appeared.
Now I felt hungry and cold, as my clothes were half torn from all that experience. I looked around and saw a small tuck shop and went there. I wanted to eat ice cream, my favorite thing, one last time before I die.
I entered the shop. An old man greeted me; his expression was kind and warm.
'Hello, young lady,' he said.
He didn't judge me on my current appearance and condition, which relieved me because I didn't want anyone to judge me anymore.
I greeted him back.
'Nice to meet you, sir,' I said.
I looked for the ice cream I needed in the refrigerator and found it. I went to the counter, but when I checked, I realized I had no money to pay.
'Sorry,' I said.
He replied, 'You can take it. You're the last customer. It will be a pleasure to help you.'
I responded, 'Why do you want to help me? I have nothing to give you and won't ever be able to.'
He replied, 'Return this kindness to someone else.'
I was dumbfounded.
'Why?' I asked. 'Why do you want to be kind when you've got nothing in exchange?'
He smiled gently. 'The world's a book. Many may like it, and many may not. It's your choice how you see it.'
I didn't understand what he meant, but I left."
When I came out of the shop and went straight to the road where I had been walking, I looked back and saw that the shop was no longer there, but the ice cream was still in my hand. I was surprised and shocked, but I continued on my path. I thought I was going insane now. I walked straight, continuing to walk and walk. And then, I saw a bright light. I walked towards it, thinking it was a car or something like that.
I ran in front of it, hoping it would hit me and I would die, but it seemed like it was not time for my death. It hit me, and boom, there was some noise, but there was no blood, no pain, no terror I should have felt. There was just peace, just a tender peace, nothing else. A bright light surrounded me. I thought I was dead, but it didn't feel like being dead.
I thought to myself, why do I feel peaceful, rather than feeling like it's the end? It doesn't feel like that. It feels like something else. Why can't I just die? I just want to die right now. Why? That' s the question
I opened my closed eyes to see nothing but radiant, illuminating bright white light, and then, boom, again I was in a sphere of glass, stuck
"What the hell is happening?" I thought. "Where am I? Why do I feel like I've been blasted? This is so weird. I was just trying to die by walking in front of a car or something like that, and now I'm stuck in a sphere of glass.
Then, a book appeared in front of me. It opened with the sound of turning pages, and suddenly, the sphere around me pulled me inside the book. It was dark at first, but then a scene appeared before my eyes.
And the only words I could say at that moment were, "Why? Why am I here? And what the hell is happening?" What I saw was like a scene from a movie. I could see a boy lying in a baby crib. It felt incredibly strange, as if I were watching a movie, trapped within that sphere of glass.