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Bleach: I hate these regressions

EnryuFic
7
chs / week
The average realized release rate over the past 30 days is 7 chs / week.
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Synopsis
Regressions are good, but this kind of thing is too much! * English is not my first language, so there may be mistakes!
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Chapter 1 - Chapter 1: The best tie-in ever!!!

The black butterfly.

I've met a couple of them in my memory, but that was when I was a kid, so far away that it's starting to feel like it never happened. That time I was very lucky, because, as I found out later, this colour comes from a rare mutation of the pigment. Usually mahones are beige in colour, but there are exceptions. However, what I see now is quite different. Black, as if from fairy tales, the insect - the messenger of change and death seemed woven from the colours of the abyss itself, or rather, from their absolute absence. It was the blackest colour I had ever seen. Even oil in the darkness seems quite light against the background of this creature.

"Goosebumps went over my skin," I remarked to my senses.

The slight thrill and surrealism is intoxicating, making my whole gut quiver in excited anticipation.

And all of this is only because I realized that I was reborn in the body of the main character of the cult work - "Bleach". Literally just now I was able to wake up from shock and disbelief, having absorbed someone else's memories and here it is, the very moment that starts the whole story:

The graceful insect flew into my room unhindered, flapping its thin wings timidly, as if afraid of damaging them against the surrounding air. Behind it, a black-haired girl in a slightly less black kimono immediately appeared. She walked through the wall like a ghost, stepped weightlessly onto my desk, jumped elegantly off it, and landed on her toes on the floor. Her gait was light, one might even say casual, as if she weighed nothing at all, which is not surprising considering her dwarven size.

I don't think we should tell her that out loud, do we? And in general, should I talk to her, should I draw her attention? It's the most clichéd solution so far!

Why not? You have to realize, clichés are a blessing!

It's easy to talk about pianos in the bushes and other conventions when you're behind the screen, but when you suddenly find yourself inside the anime, every bonus the author has prescribed at any cost should be in your hands. Let the gnats and mosquitoes be choked by kazualo-haters, devotees of trailhard and apostles of sweat. They are bound to understand, there are no other options and there can be none! Stick them in such an atypical environment, they will first of all bolt on their own principles, then why should I step on the path of pain and suffering?

So...

I'm going to have to let her awaken some of my abilities. It's probably the fastest ticket to shinigami powers right now. At least there's no other way I know of.

"He's close".

Her darkened gaze, directed at the wall, stood out from the rest of the human crowd with its otherworldly focus, catching my attention. The serious expression of her face did not give away a single drop of doubt, emphasizing the unwavering confidence in her actions. Just look at this figure and you will immediately understand the depth of intentions, and it will tell you that the mistress has only a mission - to cleanse the world of evil, the rest in this world means nothing. Truly, a real samurai from the novels, except for the fact that she is an old woman in the body of a pretty girl. So clichéd within the confines of the art, but more surreal in the seemingly limitless vagaries of reality. In my world, you'd never see such a thing with your own eyes, no doubt the people here are diamonds standing out from the masses of my past life!

But I could no longer observe its majesty. Something inside urged me to act, to put aside unnecessary timidity and take matters into my own hands. Without a doubt, Ichigo's personality had unknowingly been absorbed into me, making my current self a better version of both of us. And that change admonished to act decisively.

(Damn pathos... it makes my hands itch.)

"You're not in the anime, dummy!" - Clapping my hands in front of her face, I knocked the shinigami out of her flow state.

It was more of a defensive reaction on my part than an act of violence in the usual way. Still, a normal person in my face caught in what previously seemed like a normal cartoon would consider the environment an illusion of Kyeka Suigetsu. That was the case for the first few minutes, and now I've more or less adapted, but it doesn't save me from such mishaps.

The expression on Rukia's face changed to surprise at the same moment. The saucer-black eyes in which I saw the whole world she saw, paired with my new body, threw me off a little. A couple seconds and she regained her composure, pretending as if nothing supernatural had happened and stepped forward, which helped me come to my senses.

She pretended to be blind? Well how about that, tough nut, even in a situation like this she tries not to notice my existence, but that's okay.

"Don't ignore me, you dressed-up dwarf!" - I brazenly pinched her cheeks with my fingers and started stretching them in different directions. I didn't do it hard, because I know what it's like, but even that was enough for her.

"Did you see me?" - It wasn't surprise now, but shock. It was as if she'd met an old acquaintance, and I could guess who it was.

The girl's eyes, moist with pain from the unexpected pain, squinted. It was the first time she'd ever seen such a thing, and understandably so. Mortals don't see spirits like her. It's simply not possible, at least not based on her knowledge of the world. Pretty poor, to be honest.

"No shit, just playing with the air... Of course I can see!"

My teeth showed slightly behind my smile. It was quite difficult to hold back the smile, but I held on as best I could.

This scene reminds of that moment when you met an old friend, with whom you separated a long time ago, and now, after a long time you accidentally meet, but he no longer recognizes you, only vague images playing on the edge of his mind. And you hold back laughter, trying to awaken long-dead memories. But in this case, she doesn't even know me, and I have to play the same guy who doesn't know her. Not that I know her as a person, but I know her as a character.

"So, who are you? Don't you know about the personal boundaries law?"

"The personal boundaries law?"

Although she understood the meaning of those words, but in her current state, her brain couldn't fully grasp the context. In such cases, unexpected actions work well, so I gave her a solid smack on the forehead to knock the thoughts out of her head.

"Is it normal to break into someone's house in the afterlife?" - I asked, pretending to be perplexed. - "So after I die, I can safely enter private property and nothing will happen to me? You don't have personal boundaries there?"

"No... I mean, I do!" - My hand is completely jammed.

"Then what are you doing in my house, asshole? You're the first girl in my room. You see... in a way, you could say you stole my first kiss."

"I'm a shinigami! We are not subject to the laws of the world of the living!" - Finally pulling herself together, Rukia was outraged.

I wanted to continue my argument, but there was an unforeseen factor. We were interrupted by the door opening, and my father appeared.

"Keep it down Ichigo, don't be noisy at night!" - Ichigo's father came out of the door, and suddenly, with two feet at a speed that was unbelievable by human standards, he slammed into my back with such force that I was thrown back against the wall.

The impact, judging by the sound of the collision, was intense. If I had been a normal human, I would have broken all my ribs in the contact zone at the very least and suffered internal bleeding from the damage to my internal organs caused by my own bones. However, I am not an ordinary person, such a blow had no side effects on me. Just a slight pain in the area of impact, nothing more.

"Stop hitting me, I had my reasons!" - On pure reflexes, I punched him in the throat with my fist.

To be honest, I wasn't fully in control of my actions, but I didn't feel any remorse. Yes, some part of me still thought such a relationship was strange, but a big part of me accepted it as everyday life. Still, it wasn't the first time, and he was also strong and wouldn't get hurt, I could vouch for that. I bet the captain, albeit in a human body, was injured by such a weak attack.

"What's the reason, dummy?"

"I've got a gnome-like entity here," I pointed my finger at Rukia.

Judging by his reaction, he either doesn't see it or he's faking it. Probably the latter.

"I'm not a gnome!" - She growled at me, but I didn't listen to her, so I lifted her up and tried to move my pencil case off the table with her head, but it went through the objects without doing what I'd intended.

My idea was a failure.

"...It's adolescent," my father agreed with his thoughts.

He rubbed his temples with the palm of his hand on his forehead and then went out.

Imagine seeing your son in the middle of the night for such strange activities. Well, he felt it all. Poor middle-aged man. I'm a believer, by the way.

"You get plenty of sleep, son, and don't stay up too late studying. Take walks there, go to a restaurant with your friends, find yourself a girl... after all," - he sighed with a heavy emotion on his face, waving his hand at me. - "Okay, I'm off to bed, so don't sleep through school tomorrow."

I feel like an idiot, even though I realize the pretense of his words. Even so, he's playing too well. So much so that you can't tell the difference from real emotion.

"What's wrong with you? Are you crazy?" - Echoing her father's words, the girl smirked, covering her mouth with her palm.

Her face was pleased, even though I'd recently used her body as a club. - I'm a shinigami, now get it?!

"Uh-oh... I'm a shinigami too. Now I can go and rob a bank too, walk into someone's room and nothing will happen to me, right?"

I don't know why I got all hot and flushed, but that's just the way it is. Maybe my father was right, it's a teenage thing.

Rukia only smiled wryly at my words, amused by my reaction.

"You don't believe in shinigami, even though you can see me?" - The strange look, as if looking at an idiot, had a calming effect on me.

Finally pulling myself together, I returned to our argument: "I believe in shinigami. I told you, I'm one of them too... I mean you.

"Stop joking!"

"I'm not kidding," I sighed calmly, then looked down at the girl with a smile and repeated: "I'm a shinigami too".

"You scoundrel! If you don't believe me, here's the proof: Bakudo No. 1 - Interference!" - Extending her index and middle fingers towards me, the girl directed the technique.

In a flash, the force I couldn't resist enveloped my forearms, and against my will, she pulled them behind my back, squeezing them at one point, thus imitating handcuffs.

No matter how hard I tried to disengage them, I couldn't.

Feeling the technique on my skin, I realized a little; I think it's not correct enough to call them handcuffs. It would be more accurate to compare my wrists to powerful magnets glued to each other. The tightening force of the reiatsu doesn't allow me to pull my hands apart more than a couple of centimeters. Even my physical strength is not enough to do that, and it's not because of their unfortunate position relative to the body or weakness of muscles, Ichigo is a monster in this respect. The point is, I can't achieve anything without using my spiritual power.

"Don't try, it'll end badly," Rukia added in confirmation of my thoughts, making her big sister face.

The association might be obscure to some, but my sister in my past life used to show that exact facial expression during explanations. Just accept it as a fact.

"A normal person can't resist spiritual energy, and if you overdo it, you can end up with an invalid," Rukia finished her explanation, nodded her head, then adjusted her sleeves.

Well, I'm not going to be crippled, given my strength, not for a while, not if I twist my arm unluckily. The human body can break until the wound heals.

"Watch this!" - The shinigami demanded my attention again.

Rukia unsheathed her katana and in a flash, the head of the zampakto's hilt snapped at the bespectacled ghost flying to my left.

Where did it come from? No one knows, but it's convenient, you can see the author's hand at once. I wonder if Taito Kuba is in my writing, or if I'm in one of the fanfics.

Either way, I hope this one isn't yaoi....

"Don't be afraid," she turned to the shower.

Damn, I thought I'd been given an answer from above, and it's just her with her introduction!

"The place you're going to is not hell. It's the Community of Souls, and unlike hell, it's a peaceful place."

For the first time in the evening, she showed a kind face, then without removing her cute expression, she effectively returned her sword to the scabbard and continued: - You see, I'm no ordinary spirit. We are called shinigami.

Yes, she's right, he won't go to hell. He's going to a worse fate. This overweight office clerk will probably be thrown to the outskirts of Rukongai, where he will be cut down by a local gangster. He's gonna have the time of his life! But he doesn't need to know that now, I don't know about Rukongai myself, do I? Rest in peace, middle-aged Japanese man!

"Yeah, and you're also cleaning up those monsters. What were they called, the empty ones?"

"From where?"

"I've seen the likes of you fighting those, as well as doing the same manipulation on ordinary spirits that you're doing now."

I naturally lied, there are hardly any Void ones in this city, and the shinigami are too good at hiding. At least that's how it's been so far.

"Then why the circus?"

"I was just bored and you're overreacting."

"..."

I could've had more fun with her, but I was immediately seized by a creepy feeling. A primal feeling that made my heart clench with fear. A clammy uneasiness that was caused by an otherworldly creature. The air vibrated unpleasantly, covering his body with goosebumps, all accompanied by a creaking, metallic howl. It was an empty one that should be upon us any minute now. While I was having fun with the intruder, I had forgotten about the main danger walking around here.

It's all scripted, how good this author is!

A brief glance at Rukia made it clear that she, unlike me, hadn't heard anything, which isn't strange. I'm the main character!

"Wait for me, you asked for it!" - Not paying attention to my confusion, Rukia continued her game, forgetting about the main mission. The author did his best here, too, how he burns!

A vein protruded on the girl's forehead, the last static image I saw. My world tilted from her footstep, to which I failed to react in any way. Following that, the mini-maid wanted to raise her foot and stomp on me as punishment, but was horrified when she stopped.

I guess that growl finally reached her ears.

"Kya-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya!" mixed with the terrifying timbre came another source of sound. A little girl's scream, clearly different from before, and I know whose voice it was.

Rukia immediately took off in their direction through the window, leaving me in the same position with a final shout of, "Stay here!

"Shit!"

The anger at my little sister's cry of pain consumed me from the inside out, eating away at all my other senses. I rose to my feet and tried to break my shackles with all my mental strength. I don't hide it, it pissed me off. No matter how much of a fall guy I was, no matter how little I was here, but Chichigi's family, now my responsibility as well. I could be anything I wanted to be, but certainly not a douche bag, of that I could be sure.

My muscles bulged like a good workout, my face blazing, threatening to explode, I stretched the technique with all my might, and... it didn't work.

Anger grew from powerlessness and stupid forgetfulness, urging my whole being to make a second attempt.

I felt a warm rush of power coming from inside my belly. I had awakened the spiritual energy, the power of submission had sprouted. It wasn't certain that it was her, but such trivialities didn't matter now.

Immediately, I grabbed the bat in my room and jumped out the window after her. It took me a couple seconds to open it, though.

The landing from the second floor was easy, I didn't feel any pain in my legs, as if I had jumped from an ordinary chair, not from seven or eight meters.

My heart was beating fast, pumping blood mixed with adrenaline. I ran as fast as I could to catch the injured Yuza, but she was fine. Her heartbeat was normal, as was her breathing, and her sister was stressed out.

"How did you get out? And what is this spiritual power?" - The girl turned around to face me.

"Idiot!" - I shouted half a second before the empty one hit her in the head.

Rukia flew into the wall of our house and lay there.

She must have been concussed by the plot, otherwise a shinigami of that level would have been able to get to her feet and continue the fight.

"Tz," - I ran towards Rukia, but the paw of the empty one caught up with me faster. The only thing I could do was to put the bat under the blow, but it was blown to pieces without any problems, and then I was hit, but my body withstood it, though it hurt like hell.

As I think it's clear, I was slammed into the wall next to Rukia, who was in a bad way, judging by her condition. Blood was pouring out of her head, her face was in pain, and her arms were practically useless, she couldn't fight anymore.

"Damn it, give me your sword, I'll chop him up! Who gets distracted during a fight?"

I tried to grab her blade, but she stopped me with a question that seemed to be neither time nor place, -Do you want to save your family?

I was snapped to my senses.

"But...! But how? There's no way I could handle this thing! If I had the power... The power to protect! But don't worry, I won't back down!"

The universal despair on my face, and the determination, that's it, that's the end of the line!

Good thing I knew where Rukia was going with this and didn't hesitate for a second with my answer.

"But you're going to become a shinigami..."

"I don't care, you know I'm a shinigami too!"

"H-hah-ha-ha, okay shinigami, come to me," a heavy but no less bright smile colored the little girl's face.

Time stood still, everything suddenly froze. I obeyed her request and was pierced by her katana, through which an alien force of warmth poured into me. The emptiness inside was filled with a feeling that felt so familiar, yet so close. Her energy seemed to break the dam that was holding back my strength. I heard a thump on the ground, it was my human body, so everything went well. Spiritual energy flowed through me, as if to awaken something in my stomach area.

My acting wasn't perfect, but for a beginner, it was quite good.

In my ears immediately played the legendary motif - "Number One", but something did not give me rest. It was like a rubber band pulling me back.

For a second, I looked at my hand, which was bleeding from a recent wound, and that strange feeling started to play even stronger.

[You are injured. Return to the starting point!]

- What?

Death count: 1

***

If you liked it, give it a like and leave a comment, it's highly motivating to write further and more!

From the Author:

- If anything, the main character doesn't see statuses, messages, or anything else, he just senses that something is about to happen. This is only done for your convenience!

- As for the height our GH jumped from, it's pretty simple. Remember the chapters and episodes of Ichigo's battle with Orihime's brother, and the questions will immediately fall away. The ceilings there are obviously not lower than four or five meters, if you count from the floor.