Chereads / Asoiaf aegon I / Chapter 2 - Divide and Conquer, Chapter 10: The Troubles of a Queen

Chapter 2 - Divide and Conquer, Chapter 10: The Troubles of a Queen

First Moon, 102 AD (1 AC)

Aegon

When the raven had arrived at Ashemark from Harlaw Hall, Rhaenys and he had feared the worst. It had already taken the raven almost three days to cross the distance and Visenya had not answered any of their calls on the glass candles. What had taken the raven three days to cross their dragons had traveled in half a day.

Aegon felt his fear lessen a little as they finally arrived at Harlaw Hall and saw Vhagar still there and looking quite pleased to see them. A far cry from the grieving and angry dragon he had thought he might encounter. Orys and Quenton were waiting for them as they dismounted in the courtyard.

"Where is she Orys?" Rhaenys demanded.

He held up his hands to console their angry sister. "Visenya is perfectly well now Rhaenys."

"Why didn't she come to see us then?" Aegon asked.

Orys and Quenton shared a look that Aegon did not quite like.

"It is not our place to say. Come, we will lead you to her," his old mentor said finally and Aegon respected him too much to force him to elaborate.

They led them through the damp and dingy castle through platoons of loyal saluting soldiers and packs of awed servants before they finally arrived at the chambers Visenya had claimed for herself. The chambers that had belonged to the former Lord Harlaw before the invasions of the Westerlanders and then Visenya herself had removed the last vestiges of that house entirely.

Orys knocked on the door and they heard their sister's harsh and domineering voice from the other side. "I gave strict orders that I was not to be disturbed."

"Unfortunately Mandia, the only two people you can't give orders to have come to see you," Rhaenys said snarkily.

"…Come in," Visenya said, almost uncharacteristically timid at the sound of Rhaenys' voice.

Rhaenys immediately opened the door and barged in and Aegon almost did the same before he remembered his manners. He turned to his brother and old mentor. "Thank you for taking care of her Orys, Quenton. You may leave us now."

They both nodded and bowed before turning on their step to leave and Aegon entered the room. Visenya was sitting simply at the vanity and Rhaenys had taken a seat on the bed next to the vanity. Aegon took a chair from the corner and pulled it up to sit beside Visenya.

It had been a very, very long time since he had seen anything resembling the emotion on Visenya's face right now. It was a look of shame, of guilt, like she had failed in some way, and it was so utterly unlike her. Aegon hated seeing her so distraught.

He held her hands where they rested in her lap as he spoke to her. "Visenya my love, what happened?"

"I collapsed," she said simply and Aegon stared at her meaningfully, urging her to continue. Reluctantly, she did so.

"Jacaerys and I had a plan. To lure out the Lannister fleet west of Harlaw and destroy them. We were going to egg them on into a fight by sending Jacaerys and his fleet out without me accompanying them, and once the Lannisters took the bait, I would fly out there with Vhagar and destroy them all. But things didn't go to plan, as soon as I left the glass candle, I felt my head dizzying before I lost consciousness."

Aegon shared a look with Rhaenys. "Glass candle overuse?" she asked.

Visenya shook her head. "Not quite. I'm far too adept with the candles to push myself like that. Under normal circumstances, nothing would have happened, but the circumstances were far from normal."

She turned to him hesitantly then, as if afraid of how he would react. It was only seconds before she spoke but it felt like an eternity for Aegon. "I am with child, Aegon."

He felt the blood rushing to his head as he took a deep breath and tried to calm himself down. Meanwhile, Rhaenys gasped in realization. "That explains so much. Pregnancy takes its toll on your body and since you weren't aware that you were pregnant, you weren't properly looking after yourself. Throw in the challenges and stress of riding to battle, managing the campaign, and using the glass candles, and it's not surprising that your fatigue built up until your body just couldn't take it anymore."

"It's disgraceful that's what it is. Because of my mistake, our campaign is in jeopardy. Jacaerys almost died, a third of our fleet did! If he hadn't been smart and skilled enough to withdraw when he realized I wasn't coming, what happened in that other world could have happened again!" Visenya said, disgusted with herself.

Both of them knew what she spoke of. In that other world, their uncle Daemon had died in battle off the coast of Gulltown despite Visenya's presence and they had never understood exactly how that had happened. They had sworn not to let it happen again but because of circumstances outside of their control, their cousin had almost died in a similar way.

Aegon was grateful that he hadn't though, that he had had the skill and wisdom to withdraw successfully. But more than that, he was grateful that Visenya was safe and well. He didn't know what he would do if he lost her.

He held her hands firmer then and forced her to look at him. "It is not your fault Visenya," he said, trying to console her.

She sneered. "Don't patronize me Aegon. We both know it is."

He changed tactics then. "Very well. It is not solely your fault. It takes two to make a child. If you want to blame yourself for this, then I am at fault as well."

"I'm the one who thought I took the moon tea when I didn't like an idiot."

"The last time we had each other was a rather wild night. It's not impossible that you forgot or assumed wrongly. And as I said earlier Visenya, I am at fault as well. We made a mistake yes, and our plans for this war will have to change, but that does not mean that I regret spending that night with you, nor do I regret our child. Do you?"

No outsider would ever be able to tell Visenya was close to tears and any who did and dared to say it would find themselves short a head shortly but Aegon knew. He had always known.

"No, of course not. I just… I wish…"

Under normal circumstances, seeing Visenya speechless would be amusing but not this time. Taking pity on his wife, Aegon helped her finish her sentence. "Wish that the child came at a more convenient time? As do I. But circumstances have made it so that it came now and there is naught that we can do but adapt to it."

He saw Rhaenys looking at him from where she sat on the bed. Many things were exchanged between them wordlessly with just that look. They both knew what had to be done.

"Once you have rested and recovered, you will return to Summerhall Visenya," Aegon said.

The rage he expected came swiftly. She snatched her hands away from him and glared at him, betrayed and furious. "Excuse me?" she said, her voice dangerously low.

"You are in no fit state to be waging war Visenya. You are with child, and your ability to use the glass candles and ride to battle is hampered by it."

"You're sending me home because I failed!" she said accusingly though there was a trace of doubt and insecurity in her voice. It was so unlike her and he absolutely hated it.

Aegon kneeled before his wife and took her stubborn hands back into his. "You did not fail Visenya. You made a mistake, we both did, and we always knew we would. We are not infallible or perfect, for all that we like to think we are. I trust you implicitly Visenya, I know that you can easily turn around the situation in the Iron Islands and I would leave you to do it but I can't. You are with child.

"Even if this collapse of yours had never happened and Jacaerys' fleet was never defeated, I would always have sent you home as soon as we found out. You cannot stay here; you are endangering your life and that of our child by trying to wage war while pregnant. You have always been the most logical of the three of us, you know I'm right."

She looked at him, tears she refused to shed in her eyes. She knew he was right deep down, but she was still too proud to admit it. Aegon pressed on, placing his hand on her belly gently. He spoke with love and adoration in his voice.

"Somewhere inside here, you're carrying our child Senya. Our youngest child. Our little boy or girl. Aerion, Valaena, Aegor, Rhaena, Daena, and Aenar's younger brother or sister. They deserve to have the chance to meet their sibling, they deserve to have their mother and aunt return to them, safe and well."

At the reminder of the rest of their children that they had left all alone back home, Visenya's will crumbled away. She glared at him weakly as she gave in. "Damn you Aegon," she said and he held her as she finally let her tears escape, sheltering her from the world she had never wanted to let see her cry.

Their sister watched from the bed as it happened, a solemn look on her face. When Visenya finally broke away from Aegon's embrace, she wiped away her tears and Aegon was pleased to see some measure of the spine and steel he had always known her for had returned. If she hadn't spent the past few minutes crying into his shirt, he may not have even known she had been distraught at all.

"I will return to Summerhall on the morrow. I may still be with child but it is early days enough that I can still ride Vhagar. The Durrandons, Gardeners, Starks, Arryns, they'll all know better than to test our borders with me in Summerhall. I will reclaim the regency from Uncle Daemon and ensure that the home front continues to go smoothly to ensure there are no difficulties for your campaign," she said, her voice confident and powerful as it normally was. "And… I will spend some time with our children," she finished a little more hesitantly, her true emotions revealing themselves momentarily.

"They'll be happy to see you." Aegon smiled, doing his best to quash the slight feeling of jealousy that Visenya got to return home and see their children early. It was far overridden by his relief that she had submitted to his request for her to return to safety and he felt a lot better about leaving his children in Summerhall now that Visenya would be watching over them.

"What will happen for the war effort though? Now you will only have two dragons instead of three," Visenya said, worried.

Aegon shook his head and sighed. "We can leave Quenton and Orys to hold Harlaw and the other islands you've conquered so far, get some reinforcements for the army and fleet both prepared in Seagard and try and conquer the West as fast as possible before we come back to the Iron Islands I guess," he said, not really pleased with the idea even as he said it.

It was far from ideal, but the alternative displeased him even more. Unfortunately for him however, his other wife decided that now was the time to be difficult.

"No," Rhaenys said. Aegon locked eyes with Visenya and he knew her uncertain expression was mirrored on his own face.

Both of them turned to face their little sister who had a defiant look on her face. "There's no way you can justify leaving Orys, Jacaerys, Quenton, and the others here to rot on these islands for months without support when we still have two dragons and both of you know that. I'll take Visenya's command in the campaign here, and you can continue in the Westerlands without me. Balerion is enough for that task."

She was right. Having one less dragon would force him to be slower and more careful than he had originally planned but Balerion and his armies were more than up to the task of forcing the Westerlands to their knees. And continuing the original plan to conquer both kingdoms simultaneously would speed up the war ultimately and prevent the needless loss of lives and resources that would come from leaving part of their army and fleet in the Iron Isles without dragon support. Aegon knew that, they all knew that. But even still…

Rhaenys smiled sadly at the look on both their faces. "It's time the two of you stopped coddling me, isn't it? I'm not just your little sister anymore. I'm a grown woman, a mother, a dragonrider, a queen and general in my own right. I'm more than up to the task of commanding my own campaign by now, and it's long past time I put everything I've learned into action on my own, without either of you to hold my hand. If I'm to stand tall in my own right and contribute to making our dream a reality, I need to carry my own weight."

The smile faded away into a melancholic expression. "I'm not her."

Aegon looked at his sister then, his wife, really looked at her and let himself see her. Not the woman who had died in Dorne and left her family ruined and broken but the living, breathing, and capable woman who sat before him. The innocent and adorable little sister who had become his lovely and mischievous wife was still there but a proud queen and warrior was on that bad as well, just as fierce and capable as Visenya was and it was time that he let her prove it.

"No. You are not."

Their meeting between siblings, between husband and wives, king and queens, ruler and generals, ended with a three-way hug and embrace between all of them. Aegon held both of his wives, his sisters, close and dear to him. How long they sat there on that bed, just holding on to each other and remembering the embrace of the people they loved and trusted most in the world, none of them counted.

When they finally and reluctantly broke away from each other, Aegon kissed them both a tender farewell before turning to leave. He mounted Balerion and returned to Ashemark by sunset that same day, Meraxes and her rider remained in Harlaw Hall, and on the morrow Vhagar would be on the way to Summerhall carrying a most precious cargo.

He misliked this greatly, he thought that night as he struggled to sleep in his chambers in Ashemark without Rhaenys in his arms. The three of them were a team, a triarchy, and now all of them were in separate places. Not for the first time did Aegon curse the reminder that the fulfillment of his ambitions came at a price.

____________________________________

Fourth Moon, 102 AD

Visenya

"More news has come from the Westerlands and the Iron Islands. The campaign continues to progress well in both regions. Queen Rhaenys reports that her forces have almost conquered Saltcliffe and Blacktyde and are preparing for a landing on Great Wyk. In the Westerlands, King Aegon has informed us that his army is laying siege to Lannisport though the rest of the Westerlands, besides the castles he took to secure the supply lines between him and us, are still defiant," Visenya informed the council with a smile on her face that did not reach her eyes.

Progress well she said. Like this was good progress. If she had been there, the campaign could have gone faster, its supply lines more secure, less lives lost. Instead, while her siblings risked their lives for hard-fought victories and covered themselves in glory, she was left in Summerhall to languish.

Even looking at the council made it hard to forget what she was missing out on. So many had been replaced by deputies. Orys, Quenton, the Ranger Commandant Crowley, Josua Scales, and Edmyn Tully were all absent. Even now they all fought in either the Westerlands or the Iron Islands and Visenya wished that she was there to help command them and lead them to victory.

Unaware of the inner turmoil within his queen, the Master of Coin, Lord Crispian Celtigar spoke up. "That is good news indeed. For my own part I am pleased to announce that the Treasury remains stable. We will easily be able to continue sustaining the war for another year yet without dipping overly deeply into our vaults or resorting to any extreme tariffs or other such measures. Once some of the spoils of war from the Westerlands make their way back here, I am certain we fill find ourselves with an excess of treasure no doubt as well."

"The supply lines to both the Westerlands and the Iron Islands continue to run at max capacity. The reputation of the Crown and the Royal Bank has assured the merchants, and many are taking loans to expand their business and profit from the campaign, further strengthening the supply routes. Furthermore, there was a good harvest, plenty of excess to support the war even after stores were set aside for winter," the Master of the Banks and Mints, Raelandro Rogare said with a pleased smile.

"More levies and retinues are being raised from the Riverlands, ready to reinforce the campaigns in the west," Quenton's deputy as Master of War reported.

Her uncle Daemon, whom she had replaced as regent since her return, looked a little troubled however. "I am uncertain if it would be wise to send too many reinforcements. We could risk leaving the Riverlands defenseless. There are whispers from my Ward that agents of the Storm King have been spotted scouting the land."

Visenya nodded. Her Eyes had informed her of the matter as well. She was glad her uncle had raised it for her already though. "I have heard much the same. Send a raven to Storm's End; inform King Argilac that if a single soldier of his crosses the Blackwater Rush into our territory, the Kingswood will burn," she ordered her sister's deputy as Chief Courier on the council. She might be a few months pregnant, but she could still ride a dragon.

She noted that her uncle and the rest of the councilors looked approving of her decision. They had to show strength to ensure the other kingdoms knew better than to interfere with their campaign. The Vale's king had recently died and its current king was a young boy with his mother as a regent. The North was unlikely to interfere and Dorne did not currently share a border with them, but the Reach and the Stormlands had to be watched carefully to make sure they did not get any… ideas.

There were a number of reasons why the three of them had decided to go for the Westerlands and Iron Islands after the Riverlands. First and foremost, they had weakened each other with the former's invasion of the latter and it would symbolically complete their conquest of Harren's domain. Not to mention the economic value of all the gold and iron mines would help sustain further conquests and the strategic positioning of the two regions supported those future campaigns without overstretching and overexposing their borders to their enemies like the conquest of the Reach or the Stormlands at this point in time would. 

It was a critical part of their dream to conquer and unite all of Westeros into an empire that would stand the test of time, and she had fucked up. Her cousin had almost paid the price for her failure, a third of his fleet already had. She had sworn that she wouldn't let her uncle suffer the fate he did in that other world under her other self's watch but she had almost let the same happen to his son. It made it hard to look at her uncle in times, to see the absolute trust and loyalty he still had in her when she knew just how close it had been.

Yet Visenya was not the kind of person to let herself show such weakness to the world. She pushed onward, forcing her mind away from those dark thoughts and focused back on her duties.

The rest of the meeting continued on as council meetings usually did but it was exceptionally tiring on Visenya, far more than usual. Perhaps because she was with child, perhaps because she was worrying over her siblings who were away at war, perhaps because she was simply unused to ruling alone and with much of the council not as skilled as they usually were with the absences. Perhaps it was all of those things combined.

Eventually she withdrew from the council room back to her private solar in the royal apartments of Dragonsreach. Unlike what it had been just a few short months ago, Visenya had moved the council meetings temporarily from the Tower of Summer to a room in Dragonsreach itself, wanting to reduce the amount of stair-climbing and dragonriding she had to do to get around the castle due to her condition. She had been pregnant before but she had never quite hated it like she did now.

A part of her wanted to resent the child that grew within her even now. After all, if not for them, then Visenya's own body wouldn't be aching and rebellious, she wouldn't be left to languish in Summerhall after failing miserably in one of the roles she had always prided herself most on, forced to watch and listen desperately as her siblings fought without her.

The greater part of her found that unthinkable. Her child was a blessing, a part of her and her husband, her beloved Aegon. The fourth proof of their love and union. Yet all of her could not help but wish that their child had had more convenient timing, that they had quickened in a more peaceful time when she could have focused all of her heart and attention on them instead of worrying over other things.

In her heart, she knew that nothing was going to happen to her siblings, that her worries were all for naught, but dark thoughts continued to plague her, incessantly asking her what if the worst did occur. What then? It would all be her fault. It was maddening, and to escape it all she threw herself into her work ruling the kingdom. It was the one way she could still feel useful after Aegon had sent her away from the front. One thing that she was still good at.

She didn't know how many hours she had spent working in her solar, but when she finally looked out the window, the sun was noticeably lower in the sky, even if it still had some ways yet to go before it set.

The door opened as a familiar sight barged in. Two silver-gold haired children dressed all in red with excited smiles on their faces. "Our lessons are over for the day Mother!" Aerion beamed.

"Come play with us Aunt Visenya. Our younger brothers and sisters are waiting for you as well!" Valaena said in turn, the twins in all but name in lockstep as they always were.

Visenya sighed. "I have no time to be playing Aerion, Valaena. Can't you see that I'm very busy?"

"Please Mother? You're always busy," Aerion pleaded.

"Why can't you spend more time with us? It's just paperwork isn't it? You're not even fighting anymore like Mother and Father are," Valaena said.

Visenya winced. She knew her niece hadn't meant it that way. In the mind of an innocent child it was little more than an observation, an attempt to convince. In Visenya's mind it was just another incriminating reminder of her failure and incompetence. She felt so useless.

Her feelings worsened as she looked back over the past few months that she had spent in Summerhall and realized the children were right. After the initial joy of reuniting with them had faded, she had spent less and less time with them, drowning herself in her duties to escape her sorrows and self-depreciation. They deserved more than that from her. Her siblings, who had been so envious of her getting to return home early to them, deserved more than that.

Sighing dramatically, Visenya smirked mischievously at the twins before she rose to her feet and they cheered as they led her to the nursery where their younger siblings were all waiting. When she arrived, Visenya found herself swarmed by four more toddling little dragons. Even the current youngest Aenar, her sister's only son, was already two and a half and more than capable of walking and talking, if only to a limited degree. 

Visenya soon realized that there was another reason why she had inadvertently started avoiding the children, even if she did not mean to do it consciously. She was used to having her two siblings around to help parent the pack of overactive rascals. But now as the sole parent figure of theirs at home, the six children were all very clingy to her, pestering her with ceaseless questions and talking about six different things at once and running around the room causing mischief or picking fights with each other.

Anya and the other maids had been running themselves ragged trying to keep up with them and she shot them a sympathetic and grateful look in the corner as they watched over the scene. Eventually Valaena sat beside her, uncharacteristically content for once as she placed her hand on Visenya's belly.

"Another little brother or sister for us," she said, her face full of excitement.

Visenya could not help but smile. "That's right Valaena. Are you pleased with that?"

"Of course!" Her niece beamed before her smile faded a little. "I just wish that Mother and Father were here as well."

At that Visenya's own mood darkened. She tried her best not to let her mind be dragged back into the reminder of her failures but with every word she spoke, her niece made it worse, just as she had earlier.

"I'm glad you're here though Aunt Visenya. We missed you all so much and we were so happy when you came home early."

The swirl of emotions in Visenya's heart was chaotic. Love for the young girl in front of her and all of her siblings, joy that she had been blessed to return home to them early, the reminder of her failure laying overhead like a dark menacing shadow, the ceaseless worrying for the husband and sister she had left behind to wage war without her.

"Do you know when Mother and Father will return?" Valaena asked hopefully.

It was an innocent question but it shattered Visenya's tenuous grip on her emotions. Several thoughts screamed in her head at once.

Jealousy. Am I not enough for you?

Fear. What if something happens to them and I'm not there?

Guilt. I made mistakes and yet I got to return home to peace and safety, leaving them to clean up my mess for me.

Anger. Why are you asking me this girl? Are you trying to remind me just how useless I am??

"No. I don't," she forced out with difficulty, doing her best to regain control.

"Why don't you know?" Valaena complained. She looked at her as if she expected her to have all the answers and was disappointed that she didn't. Another reminder of her failures.

"I just don't Valaena!" she said bitterly, far harsher than she should have.

Valaena looked crestfallen, almost frightened as she withdrew from her. Visenya's anger was gone as quickly as it came at the look on her face and she held her niece tightly to her as Aerion and the others looked on concerned.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have raised my voice," she said shamefully, giving no excuses or explanations. She would not burden her nine-year-old niece with her problems.

Valaena hugged her back before she returned to her siblings, pestering her no more though she did smile at her when she caught her looking before turning her attention back to the game Aerion and Aegor were playing.

Visenya just wished she knew the answer to Valaena's question. She needed Aegon and Rhaenys back home before she drove herself mad.

______________________________________

Author's Note: I'm not very satisfied with the second POV but I hope you guys liked this chapter overall nonetheless! So sorry for the delays! Any suggestions for the title or refining the chapter? Let me know your thoughts, suggestions, and any questions in the comments below or over on Discord! https://discord.com/invite/NSEwuzpcWm