"Do you really think I'm a bad person, Jing?" Alex asked as they left the director's office.
"..." Jing remained silent, her gaze fixed on the floor ahead.
"You don't have to say it. I know what you're thinking. You're comparing me to that… worm back there, and suddenly, I seem like a much better person, right?" Alex asked, a smug grin spreading across his face.
"Disgusting," Jing replied coldly. Although she was grateful for his help, it didn't change her opinion of him. His arrogant display in the director's office had only reinforced her disdain. She couldn't forget the humiliation of the previous night, the way he'd treated her like a possession, a prize to be claimed.
"I know you hate arrogance, Jing. But sometimes, you have to be arrogant to get things done. Some people mistake kindness for weakness, and some idiots… well, they need a firm hand to remind them who's in charge."
"Scoundrel," Jing retorted, unable to resist the jab, despite recognizing the truth in his words. His language was still too crude, too reminiscent of the man who'd bought her, the man who'd claimed ownership of her body.
"I never claimed to be a saint, Jing. There's a saying, 'Bad guys need skills, but scoundrels need style.' You might think I'm despicable, but everyone is despicable in their own way. Who can claim to be completely innocent? Qin Shi Huang was despicable, but he unified the six kingdoms. Napoleon was despicable, but he conquered Europe. Despicable people can get away with anything, just like you. If you'd been more… ruthless from the start, you might have gotten that private room for your father without my help. Maybe some things seem despicable to you, but to me, they're just… strategic. I'm despicable because I'm fearless. Just like you, Jing. When we were younger, we all dreamed of flying. But what about now? Your phoenix has turned into a… well, let's just say it's not quite as majestic. It's a shame, really."
"Taking a step back doesn't mean I've given up. Selling myself to you doesn't mean I've surrendered. Letting go of my dreams doesn't mean I've lost hope…!" Jing's voice was quiet, but firm. She wouldn't let him break her, not completely.
"Yes, yes, of course. But if you can't fly, those wings of idealism become a burden. Tell me, Jing, do you want to fly, or do you want to live?" Alex stopped at the turn of the stairs, his body close to hers. He gently tilted her chin up, forcing her to meet his gaze. His smile was… unsettling. If anyone saw them like this, they'd think he was harassing her.
Jing hesitated, then lowered her head, her earlier defiance fading. The memory of his touch, the weight of his body against hers, the humiliation of her surrender – it all came rushing back, making her feel weak and vulnerable.
"Tell me, Jing," Alex pressed, his fingers tightening slightly on her chin.
"Live… I want to live…," she whispered, her voice barely audible.
"That's right, Jing. You need to learn how to live," Alex said, his voice softening slightly. "Don't set your expectations too high. Perfection doesn't exist, not in this world. You have to be pragmatic, seize opportunities when they present themselves, and make difficult choices. We both did that, didn't we? I seized the opportunity to… acquire you, and you seized the opportunity to get what you needed. There are always sacrifices. Don't expect money to fall from the sky. And if it does, it's probably because I threw it there. So, you don't need to remind yourself every time you see me that I'm a bad person, a scoundrel, a scumbag. Think of it this way—a change in perspective can simplify things. A change in stance can make you more tolerant. A change in attitude… well, you might even discover that I have some… redeeming qualities. Try looking at things from a different angle, Jing. You might even find yourself… falling for me."
"The only thing I've noticed, Alex, is that no matter what angle I look at it from, your arrogance is… astounding," Jing retorted, her voice laced with sarcasm. Falling for him? In her dreams.
"I admit, I've lost some of my youthful… exuberance. I'm not as reckless as I used to be. Call it… maturity, if you will. But I've never regretted it. I embrace my flaws. Just like you, Jing. Heaven gave you beautiful eyes, but you use them to glare at me. Heaven gave you a beautiful smile, but you always look so cold. Those are your flaws… your imperfections…"
"And yet you still bought me," Jing said, unable to resist the jab. She had to admire his audacity, his thick skin.
*Glaring? Cold? That's only for you!* she thought to herself.
"You weren't paying attention, were you? Lost in thought, perhaps? Captivated by my… irresistible charm?" Alex asked, a smug grin spreading across his face. "As I said, I appreciate imperfections. And yours… are particularly endearing."
"Captivated? Hmph. I can't think of a single word to describe you, Alex Stone," Jing said, her voice dripping with disdain.
"I can. As your first… and perhaps only… man, your subconscious is already fixated on me…"
"Sigh…" Jing sighed deeply. This man was the most shameless person she'd ever met. *First?* What did he mean by "first"? The first man she'd ever slept next to? The first man she'd ever… The thought made her cheeks burn.
"Does what I'm saying make you uncomfortable, Jing?" Alex asked, stepping closer, his gaze intense.
"You're right, it does," Jing admitted, her voice barely a whisper.
"I know. Love is like a book. If you read it carelessly, you'll miss the important parts. If you read it too carefully, you'll find yourself… overthinking things…"
"You… who said anything about love?" Jing exclaimed, her cheeks flushing crimson. There were limits to her patience, even with this man. His shamelessness was truly astounding.
"You did, Jing. I didn't say a word about love," Alex replied innocently, releasing his hold on her chin.
"Tell me what you like about me, and I'll change it. Just let me go," Jing pleaded, her voice trembling slightly.
"I like the way you look when you're dressed," Alex said, his gaze lingering on her.
"Shameless!" Jing hissed, her eyes flashing with anger.
"Shameless? Such a… pedestrian insult. Don't you remember our vows from high school?" Alex pressed her against the wall again, his body close to hers. The thin fabric of her blouse offered little resistance to his touch, and he could feel the soft curves of her body against his own. He couldn't resist the urge to brush against her breasts, his touch lingering.
"You… what vows? We never made any vows! Stop making things up!" Jing protested, trapped between his body and the wall.
"Back in high school, when you were still an innocent young girl, you swore you'd die before you'd be with me. 'If you come any closer, I'll kill myself!' you said. You promised to meet me in the next life: 'Want to pursue me? Try again in your next life!' And you even claimed you'd rather die than be with me: 'I'd rather die than be with you!' Years have passed, but I still remember those passionate declarations, those heartfelt vows. I often think about you, Jing, especially at night, when I can't sleep. I remember your… impassioned expression… it was quite captivating. I've cherished those vows all these years, and now… they've finally come true. We're together, just like you promised. Isn't that wonderful?" Alex said, his voice laced with mock sincerity.
"Alex… just because I sold myself to you doesn't mean you can do whatever you want. I still have my dignity!" Jing said, glaring at the man who was undoubtedly the most shameless person she'd ever met.
"Dignity? Then, Miss Jing, would you mind showing me your… dignity?" Alex asked, a mocking glint in his eyes. "Since you're so full of dignity, why don't you use it to cure your father's illness?"
"..." Jing was speechless.
"What's wrong? Cat got your tongue? Perhaps you've realized how… ridiculous… the word 'dignity' sounds? Everyone talks about it, as if saying it out loud somehow makes them more noble. Wrong. You can have your dignity with other people, but not with me. If you want dignity around me, you'll have to earn it." Alex leaned closer, his lips brushing against her ear. He inhaled the scent of her perfume, a delicate floral fragrance that made his head spin. He couldn't resist the urge to lick the soft skin of her earlobe.
"Ah! You…!" Jing gasped, her body trembling.
"Didn't you say you'd do anything I asked, as long as I paid you? A woman of your… dignity… wouldn't lie to me, would she?" Alex asked, his voice husky, his nose nuzzling the sensitive skin of her neck. He was like a predator, toying with his prey.