"How wrong?" he repeats asking, his question surprising me. What does he mean by that? How wrong? I mean, it's wrong in every possible way.
"It's just hugging. Why are you making such a fuss about it? Why are you acting like I'm harassing you?" His voice lowers, but his grip doesn't loosen. "You were hugging me back a few minutes ago. So, why are you fighting it now?"
"This is wrong," I repeat, my voice firmer this time.
But he ignores me, as if he hasn't heard. I stand frozen, speechless, the sound of his drumming heart filling my ears.
"Can you feel my heart, Maya?" he asks softly. "This is what happens every time you're close to me. Even when I just think about you."
I want to say something, anything, but the words seem to have abandoned me.
"I'm attracted to you, Maya," he continues, his voice raw with vulnerability. "I've fallen in love with you. You're the reason I rejected Princess Ferrior. Because, for some reason, I've realized the kind of person I truly want. Not just someone to call my wife, but someone I want by my side. A friend…" He pauses, as though weighing his next words carefully. "A partner."
"What... what are you talking about?" I stammer, my confusion giving way to frustration. "Is this how you treat your servants?"
"Trust me," he says, his tone steady but soft, "I don't even remember most of their names. They serve me, but I couldn't recognize their faces if we met outside these walls. I've never let any of them spend time in my room unless it was necessary—cleaning, delivering messages, or completing a task. But you… I've never seen you as just a servant. Not from the first day. I don't know what caught my attention on you."
"Thank you," I say, forcing my voice to remain calm despite the storm raging inside me. "But I can't accept your… offer."
"What offer?" he asks, a faint smile tugging at his lips. "This isn't an offer, Maya. This is me asking you out."
"And this is me saying no. Please accept my answer. If it displeases you, then you can throw me out of the palace or—" I pause, my voice trembling. "Or have me killed. I don't know. Do whatever will make you feel better."
His grip tightens slightly, not in anger but in desperation. "Do you really think I could do any of those things to the person I'm helplessly in love with?"
I shake my head, pulling back enough to meet his gaze. "I can't accept your love, Your Highness."
"Don't call me that," he snaps, his voice sharp before softening again. "Earlier today, when I went out with my father, he asked me about the changes he's noticed in me. And I told him. I told him that I'm experiencing something new. I told him I'm falling in love—and that it's changing me. I even told him it's you, Maya. He doesn't care who I choose, as long as I'm happy and can fulfill my duties. If you're worried about them, you don't have to be."
"What did you just say?" I manage to step back this time, my eyes wide with shock. "You told the king?"
He nods, his expression unwavering. "I told my father about my feelings for you, and he's fine with it. He supports me."
I stare at him, unable to believe the words coming out of his mouth. My mind races, trying to process the implications of what he's just said.
"I've told you I can't," I say, my voice breaking. "I'm not the person you think I am. I'm not the right person for you. What don't you understand about that simple sentence?"
"You don't get to decide that," he says firmly. "These are my feelings, Maya. I know what I feel for you. Whether you think you're the right person or not—that's for me to decide. I'll give you time to think about it. And if you really don't feel the same way, then I'll do whatever it takes to make you feel the same for me. Because it's you I want, and leaving you alone is not an option for me."
"There's nothing to think about," I say, my voice rising. "A 'no' has always been a complete sentence to me. And it should be respected."
With that, I storm out of the room, my heart racing and my thoughts in complete disarray.
By the time I reach the servants' quarters, my legs feel like they might give out beneath me. The room is dimly lit, with only the faint glow of the lanterns from the hallway seeping in.
Usually, we share these cramped quarters—five female servants to a room. I hear whispers as I enter, but I don't care. They always talk about me. About how I spend so much time near Arthur. About why the prince seems to favor me.
I ignore them all.
Walking straight to my wooden bed, I collapse onto it and pull the rough blanket over my head, curling into myself. My chest tightens as silent tears begin to fall.
I've never regretted being born a man as much as I do now.
Why is this happening to me?
The room grows quieter as the others settle into sleep, their soft snores filling the air. But sleep eludes me entirely. My mind won't stop spinning, replaying the events of the day, the words Arthur said, the way his arms felt around me.
I can't stay here.
If I don't leave, the king might order me to marry him. And then what? What will I do? I have no power to refuse. No way to escape their will.
I clench my fists beneath the blanket, the fear and frustration building inside me.
Just as I was beginning to feel a sliver of happiness, it's all been snatched away.
I shouldn't have let him hug me. I shouldn't have stood there, frozen, embracing him back like an idiot.
This is all my fault.
•○
By dawn, I'm still wide awake, staring blankly at the wooden slats of the ceiling.
Michael.
The thought comes to me suddenly, like a lifeline in the dark. If anyone can help me escape this place, it's Michael.
I'll ask him for help. I have to.
It's the only way I'll survive this.