"Ah, may I know why he's here, if it's OK to tell me?" I asked in a cautious tone.
The nurse smiles and says, "Oh, that's OK. Mr. Kyle is diagnosed with depression. But now he's better. But till he clears the bills, he won't be allowed to leave."
Though he was a total stranger, I don't know why, for some reason, I felt drawn towards him. "Sister, may I know how much is due?"
The nurse looks at the file in her hands and says, "Ah, eight thousand seven hundred and eighty-five."
"Ah, where's the cashier?"
Worried about his reaction, the nurse said, "Miss, I don't think that's a good idea."
"Don't worry about Kyle; I'll talk to him myself." I told the nurse in an assuring tone.
The nurse calms down and says, "OK, then the cashier is out front. Just take his name and room number: four O five."
I went over to the cashier and said, "Hello, I'm here to pay the bill for room four O five, Kyle."
The cashier looks at me and then checks on her computer and says, "Ah, yes, Mr. Kyle. The total is three thousand seven hundred eighty-five. How will you pay? Cash or..."
I took my card out and said, "Card."
The nurse took the card and then, after deducting the amount, handed me the slip and said, "Thank you, Miss."
"Jessica, Jessica Jiles."
The nurse smiles and says, "Thank you, Miss Jessica."
Then I went over to meet my friend and then went back home. But for some odd reason I could not forget about him. And I don't know why, but I went back to meet him.
As I entered his room and saw him sleeping, I wished the time would stop this very moment. But he woke up and smiled as he saw it was me.
"Oh, sorry, I didn't mean to wake you."
Kyle spoke up before I could say anything else, "Jessica, the nurse told me about you paying the bills. Thanks, but I'll pay you back soon. I think they'll let me out soon now that the bills are clear."
"Is that all you can say on seeing me?" OK, the moment I said that, I really wanted to run out of the room. Like, how could I say that? Like, for real, did I actually say that?
Kyle smiled and said, "Actually, I don't think I have the right to ask you anything, but if I could, I would ask, 'Would you be my girlfriend?
I was shocked and amazed at what he just said, "What? You don't even know me, and if it's because I paid for the bills, how come you don't think I might have ulterior motives?" Kyle let out a small laugh, and honestly, now I knew what it meant to be head over heels over someone.
"Jessica, the nurse must have told you, 'My parents are dead, and I'll let you know they were common people. So, apart from a house, I don't have any other assets. I did part-time jobs to complete my education, and now I'm an architect over at Cruiser Software. I can hand you my full income."
Suddenly he goes quiet, and the look on his face changes from being bright to gloomy. He took a deep breath and said, "But if there's one thing about me that could or can make you back away, it is my depression."
"Kyle, to be honest, I don't know what depression is or how someone gets or becomes depressed to this extent." (I refer to his point of being hospitalized) "All I know is, if you have someone who can love and care for you, no one will be depressed for long. So, now I, Jessica Jiles, am asking, "Do you want to be my boyfriend?"
Kyle instantly got up and hugged me, and for some odd reason, my tears rolled down my cheek. As we sat back, Kyle said, "Jessica, I don't want to hide anything from you, so, my parents, they died in a car accident. Though the police wrote it off as an accident, it was a hit-and-run. And the reason I'm here is because I met the wrong person, a person I want to forget, so."
"Kyle, if you don't want to speak about that person, don't, and I'll never ask you about that person. Not even if that person is a he or a she. When you want, if you want, you can tell."
We hugged again, but today, after seeing him standing next to Amanda, I think I should have asked. At least I would have known the moment he came with the divorce, he found her again.
The Present
Suddenly my phone rang and got me out of my flashback. Seeing it's Derak, I took the call, "Hello."
"Jessica, I just found out it was Amanda who paid his bills for the first two months before leaving him."
I was shocked on hearing this, because Kyle was in the hospital for seven months, according to me. The reason for that was I cleared his seven-month bill, but he was there two months before, meaning a full nine months.
Isn't this odd? I didn't even ask him how long he had been here. Oh, was I really such a fool? All the time I thought those months were the special ones as they became the foundation of our love. Whereas he was there depressed because his first love left him. And, since she is a replica, or I am, then when he saw me and asked me to be his girlfriend, was it only to keep her with him through me? So, I was really a substitute for him. It all made sense why all of a sudden he left.
On seeing me for the first time, he instantly asked me to be his girlfriend, and now he has found her; he instantly left me. Gosh, I was such a fool, such a big fool.
Tears began to roll down my cheeks; my body felt like it was betraying me and didn't want to follow me. Again, Derak's voice got me out of my stance: "Jessica, Jessica, can you please keep a hold of yourself till I come over? Where are you?"
I looked at my phone and shared my location and then said, "Derak, can you come over?"
"Jessica, wait for me; don't move from there; I'm coming."
As Derak disconnected the call, I was going to cross the street and go over to the sitting chair in the park, but as I crossed, a crossing car hit me and I fell to the ground.
Before I lost my consciousness, I could see Derak come running towards me, and then I blacked out.
As I woke up, my eyesight was misty, and my head felt a throbbing pain, and I was amazed to see Kyle's face through my misty eyes.
Then he said in his soft voice, "I love you. You have to take care of yourself for me."
As my eyesight cleared and the pain in my head reduced a bit, I saw the room was empty.
As I looked around and saw it was empty, I gave out a soft laugh at myself. I began to speak to myself, "What was I thinking? How could he know I was here? If someone saw me like this, they would yell at me and say, 'what's wrong with you? Someone who has left you, will he come like this and if he does, it will be only out of sympathy, not love. Girl, get out of it."
Then I regained my determination and said, "Yes, that's what I have to do, I will do. From now on, I will live only for myself and no one else. From this moment onwards Kyle is history for me. Just like I closed every history chapter in school, I will close my history with Kyle as well."
Unknown to me, outside my room
As Kyle noticed Jessica's sight was regaining, he left the room and stood against the wall out of her room. As he stood there and heard Jessica speak to herself, tears rolled down his cheeks, and he said in a slow voice, "Jessica, I promise to pay for every tear that rolled down your cheek, every sad moment you faced. But please for god's sake, take care of yourself. I will be back."
Kyle was wearing jeans and a black t-shirt with a Grey hoodie. As he began to walk away, he saw Derak coming towards him, so he put his hoodie on his head to cover his face and walked past Derak.
As he crosses Derak, he stops and looks back. As Derak enters Jessica's room Kyle says, "Derak, thanks for being there for Jessica. I owe you a lot, man."
Back to my room
As Derak enters and sees me sitting in my bed, he comes over and presses the call button and says, "Jessica, why didn't you call the nurse? And, (he makes me lie down again) lie down. You got hit by a car, you could be having a concussion. Is your head hurting?"
"Yes, and."
As I was going to tell, the nurse comes in and says, "Mrs. Walter, please lie down, and don't move."
Then she goes and comes back with the doctor. The doctor comes over and first checks my eyes with his torch, and then takes my pulse. Then he flashes the torch in my eyes and tells me to follow his finger. I did as he said.
"Mr. Derak, your sister seems to be fine. We will still keep her for observation and if everything is fine, we can discharge in the evening." He then looks at me, "Mrs. Walter, take some rest now, and if you feel any discomfort, please call us."
But before I could say anything, Derak says, "It's OK, doctor, I've taken the day off and her friends are coming over."
The doctor smiles and says, "Oh, well then that's great. Take care."
The nurse checks on the IV and then leaves with a smile.
As the nurse left, I said, "Derak, why did you have to tell them? You know how much they make a fuss out of nothing."
"Out of nothing? You got hit by a car and you're telling us, it's nothing." Sandy says in a tone mixed with anger and hurt.
Patricia also adds in saying, "Jessica, if we were in your place, would you not come?"
"OK, OK, calm down. Can I ever win with you guys?"
Then Patricia goes over to the table and removes a lunch box and opens it. Then she places two boxes in front of me on the table. As she opens the lids, one has cornflakes, and the other one has porridge. I was smiling as Sandy took a flask out and poured some orange juice into the glass.
"Girls, I'll be out by evening. You could have gotten from the cafeteria. The food's not bad. I used to eat here when I used to come for Kyle."
The moment I took his name, pin drop silence fell in the room. I looked at their faces and said, "What? You all look like I took a ghost's name." Realizing why they look like that, "Guys, he's history for me. You know when I woke up, I thought he was here and said to me, 'I love you. You have to take care of yourself for me. When I woke up, my eyesight was misty. But when my eyesight cleared, he wasn't there. That's when I decided to make his history so, now he does not affect me. Guys, I've been in love with him for three years and seven months and he is my first and only love."
"Jessica, what do you mean by that? If that dumbo could not realize what he lost, doesn't mean there's no one who can understand your worth."
Derak also says, "Jessica, he's not the end of the world. You will find someone who is really worthy of you and your love."
I clear my throat as if I was about to make a confession and say, "Guys, Kyle is my first-love and only love. I can never forget him and as long as he's in my memory, I can't love anyone else. As for being single, that's not bad. I have you all, you're not going to leave me."
Just then Derak's phone rings so he takes the call and says, "Hi, mom, yes she's fine and the doctor said, 'if everything is fine, she can be discharged in the evening. No mom, arrange a room on the ground floor for now. After a few days, she can go to her room upstairs."
As he disconnects the call, I ask him, "Derak, someone else is also in the hospital? Then what are you doing here? Go on, the girls are here for me."
Sandy was also going to say something but he stops her and says, "Jessica, that was my mom, I told them about you and me. So, my parents said to bring you over. I told you they wanted to meet you and they won't let you go. Now with your accident, they won't listen to a 'no', so, if you don't want to."
"Of course I'll go with you." As I said this, Derak hugged me and I felt so warm. And this is the first time I realized how nice it is to have a brother. Come to think of it, if I hadn't sent Derak back that day, when he came to give the divorce papers, Derak would have given Kyle a punch for me. Imagining the view of Derak punching Kyle, I let out a laugh.
Seeing me laughing, Patricia says, "Hey, what's so funny?"