Highschool is a difficult time, at least that's what people say, however I'd say difficult is an understatement. I wasn't struggling academically, but social I was drowning. All throughout my first year of high school my friends were getting boyfriends or fawning over the boys playing basketball or volleyball, i never really got the appeal, i mean they're just people not like they were drop dead gorgeous like some of the girls I've seen. Seeing how happy my friends were, I thought maybe I wasn't trying hard enough. I started making myself think I liked these boys but it just wasn't right, it didn't feel right. I mean you can only fake something for so long. I asked my friends if they ever felt weird about guys, like they felt they didn't like guys the same way they might like a girl. "Weirdo" was the only response I got out of em. After that they started distancing themselves from me, as if I carried some kind of "disease" they were gonna catch. Who cares not like they were any nice to begin with. Only way to stay afloat socially is either not caring or changing yourself to fit in, I did neither. I care too much but I also don't care enough to change myself for others.