Chapter 32 - 32

If someone had told Hermione during the final year of the war that they would defeat Voldemort and that the three of them would survive, she'd have been overjoyed. But if they'd also told her that on Harry's nineteenth birthday she'd be standing next to him in a receiving line at Grimmauld Place warmly greeting Slytherins—along with more than a hundred others—she'd have been shocked senseless. And if they'd added that Harry would have caught the Snitch that afternoon for the Chudley Cannons, and that she herself would be intimately involved with their star Chaser, she'd have escorted her interlocutor to a secure ward at St Mungo's.

'How are you holding up?' she asked Harry during a momentary lull in guests.

'I'm all right. Though I wish Helena would turn up—I really want to introduce you to her.'

'Yes, I'm looking forward to meeting her.'

Hermione was more than a little curious about Harry's 'ravishing, unnamed companion.' She'd caught a glimpse of his previous conquest, whom he'd apparently tired of in less than a week, but it was clear he'd developed strong feelings for her successor.

She recalled what Ginny had said about Harry's 'yawning need,' and she considered whether it was driving his rapidly escalating affections. Then again, she'd thrown herself completely into her relationship with Ryan just as quickly, so she was in no position to judge.

Hermione wondered what connection, if any, there might be between Harry's yawning need and his extraordinary charisma. Tom Riddle had been similarly endowed, but his need was for domination rather than affection. It was fortunate that Harry had no desire to become a Dark wizard, because he could have gathered followers with shocking ease.

But there was no mistaking Harry's kind and simple intentions, that night in particular. He really just wanted for everyone to have a good time, and for witches and wizards who'd been kept apart by Phineas Nigellus's unconscionable meddling to finally interact.

Harry had to be growing weary of greeting guests—she certainly was. She longed to join Ryan on the rooftop dancing, or to spend time with the friends he'd invited. She was enjoying meeting all the new people at the party, but her former classmates were a steady source of barbs.

'Hermione!' exclaimed Parvati. 'I can't believe how good you look, especially your hair. How long did you spend working on it this afternoon?'

'No time at all,' said Hermione. 'I found a charm in an old spellbook, and this is the result. I wear it this way more or less all the time now.' Except for Wednesday night, when Ryan insisted I wear it 'seventies glamour model' style, she added internally.

'Amazing, I never would have believed it. And you're dating Ryan Bellamy of all people. Interestingly enough, he's someone else you and Lavender had in common, along with Ron of course.'

'I'm sorry?'

'Yes, during seventh year she had his team photograph on display next to her bed. Inside the curtains, if you know what I mean. She would never have believed he'd go out with you, but then I suppose you're a bit of a magnet for Quidditch stars. How odd ... you'd think they'd prefer fans of the sport.'

'And how are you doing, Parvati?'

'Horribly—I've been quarrelling non-stop with my parents. They arranged marriages for Padma and me when we were infants, of course, and Padma's match has turned out just fine, but mine's an absolute pill and I've refused. And so now they're saying I've turned out too headstrong and they should never have raised us in England, but I said England's not the problem—the problem is the unappealing wizard they're trying to stick me with. I deserve a lot better, especially considering I was Harry Potter's first girlfriend.'

'No you weren't,' said Hermione automatically. 'Cho Chang was.'

'No,' insisted Parvati. 'Harry asked me to the Yule Ball, don't you remember?'

'Yes, and you had a terrible time with him and ended up dancing with a boy from Beauxbatons the rest of the evening.'

'Be that as it may, I was still the first witch Harry ever asked out.'

No, thought Hermione, Cho was, only she'd already accepted Cedric. 'Yes, I suppose you're right,' she said, not wanting to be ungracious.

And then Sally-Ann Perks of all people was snide to her. 'Hermione Granger, look at you ... all grown up.'

'And you as well,' said Hermione, puzzled. 'I'm glad you were able to attend the party after all. Is Lily here with you?'

'No, I'm afraid not, but she sends her best. I can't get over you, though. You were such a mousy little bookworm, and now you're with the tastiest hunk in all of league Quidditch.'

Has Sally-Ann got into the Firewhisky? Harry isn't even serving any. 'I can't say I expected to date a professional athlete, but he's quite intellectual, actually.'

'Aren't you forgetting about Viktor Krum? I never understood what he saw in a fourteen year-old, but there's no accounting for taste.'

'I was fifteen,' said Hermione. 'Anyway, thanks for coming to the party—I hope you'll have a good time.'

Sally-Ann didn't seem inclined to leave. 'I can't get over this party. Harry really splashed out ... do you know how much it cost him?'

'No, he didn't confide in me. But I know he was very concerned about everyone's comfort and security.'

'I can see that. And speaking of comfort, have you met his new girlfriend? Is she here tonight?'

'No, I haven't, but I imagine I will later.'

'What's her name?'

'I don't actually know,' lied Hermione. Why isn't she leaving? Why is Harry taking so long with Theodore Nott?

'I wish she'd been visible in that photograph. Harry looked fantastic though. What do you think made him start wearing robes?'

Hermione decided to throw Sally-Ann a bone, in the hope she'd leave. 'He was impressed with the quality of his team robes, so he decided to see what else the tailor carried.'

Sally-Ann nodded, apparently satisfied. 'That makes sense. Well, it's been nice talking to you. Perhaps I'll see you again later this evening.'

'Perhaps,' said Hermione. 'Thank you again for coming.'

'I wouldn't have missed it for the world.'

After Sally-Ann departed, Hermione braced herself for another round of subtle insults, this time from Nott. But he was surprisingly pleasant, and after he left she had a bit of leisure to reflect on how splendid it was that the old blood prejudices seemed to be disappearing, in their generation at least.

She didn't notice Romilda Vane until it was too late to intercede. Merlin, she was pawing Harry shamelessly! Hermione hoped she'd keep her distance from Ryan, not because she feared he'd succumb, but because she knew how uncomfortable it would make him. She was grateful beyond words that Harry had hired the charmed goblets.

Hermione was chatting with Neville and Hannah when Harry suddenly demanded her attention. 'Hermione, help! It turns out all the Chocolate Frogs contain my card.'

She immediately realised what people would think and was horrified on his behalf, though she had to admit it was funny. 'Oh no! That's positively mortifying. What do you want me to do?'

'I don't know,' said Harry in a panic. 'Obliviate everyone? Or at least explain to people what happened.'

'I can put up a sign on the dining table at the very least. And perhaps Ryan can stop the music and make an announcement.'

'Please, yes, anything.'

As much as she pitied Harry, she was relieved to have an excuse to abandon the receiving line. She rushed down to the dining room, which was very crowded. Perhaps half of the Chocolate Frogs remained, and several people nearby had opened theirs and were looking at the card.

'He didn't know!' she blurted. 'Harry had no idea all the cards were of him.'

A handful of people turned towards her, but most of the room didn't react. She used her wand to amplify her voice and announced, 'I'm terribly sorry to interrupt, but I've an urgent announcement. I don't know whether you've seen the Chocolate Frogs, but Harry had no idea until a minute ago that all the cards were of him. The confectioner sent them to him as a gift, and he assumed they were the normal assortment.'

People were laughing but Hermione continued, her voice still amplified. 'I realise a lot of you haven't met Harry before, but I can assure you he's completely mortified—he'd never do something like this on purpose. I know he'd appreciate if you spread the word that it was all a horrible mistake.'

She removed the charm on her voice and was approached by Lara. 'I knew it had to be something like that, considering how uncomfortable he was to learn they'd put him on a card in the first place.'

'Yes, exactly. Poor thing, he's taken so much abuse over the years, with people thinking the worst of him. I hope he won't let it ruin the party for him.'

'I'll spread the word as well,' said Lara. 'But you have to admit, it's awfully funny.'

Hermione smiled. 'It is, isn't it? I had to cover my mouth to keep from laughing when he told me.' She pulled some paper and a quill from her handbag and wrote what she hoped was a clear explanation. Then she used her wand to enlarge and stiffen it, and she conjured a stand for her makeshift sign.

'That should take care of the dining room,' she told Lara. 'But I should go make the announcement elsewhere. See you later, I hope.'

'Yes, I'm just loading up on food before heading up to dance. Can you believe all these house-elves? I've been watching, and they keep replenishing whatever runs out.'

Hermione sighed in irritation. She knew the house-elves had eagerly volunteered for the job, but she hated how brainwashed they all were.

Her next stop was the entrance hall, in front of Padfoot's portrait. She amplified her voice and made a similar announcement to the one she'd made in the dining room, which was received again with good-natured laughter. Next she went to the formal reception hall and repeated the process.

'Well, if it isn't Miss Perfect Hermione Granger,' said Marietta Edgecombe.

'What are you doing here?' asked Hermione, certain that Harry hadn't invited her.

'Cho brought me. And yes, I know I wasn't invited, but I assume that was for your benefit more than Harry's,' said Marietta coldly.

Hermione narrowed her eyes. 'What makes you believe that? You betrayed him to Umbridge, after all.'

'Yes, but that's not why I wasn't invited. You didn't want me here because you've a guilty conscience.'

Hermione had been avoiding looking at Marietta's forehead but finally glanced at it. The spots and obvious scars were gone, but the skin texture was somewhat rougher than the rest of her face.

'Yes, have a look at your handiwork,' said Marietta. 'I've certainly been able to contemplate it at leisure. It's much improved at least, thanks to a Muggle dermatologist I visited last year, out of desperation.'

Merlin, she was disfigured that long?

Marietta continued, 'When you think of all the other people who betrayed Harry, as you put it, how come none of them got punished the way I did?'

Hermione refrained from pointing out he'd cursed Draco with Dark magic and later relieved him of his wand. 'You weren't just hurting Harry. You put all of us at risk, and you broke your word. I warned you when you signed the contract.'

'What about the pressure I was under? My mother was going to lose her job. Or don't you think parents deserve consideration? I heard what you did to yours.'

'That's none of your concern. And my motivation was to help Harry and defeat Voldemort, not protect my own skin.'

'Interesting choice of words, don't you think?' She turned towards the mirror above the fireplace and said, 'Look at your skin. It's perfect, really. Even when you were ugly, there was never anything wrong with your complexion.'

Hermione looked at her unblemished reflection in the mirror. It's true, she thought. I never did have spots.

'You of all people should know what it's like to feel unattractive, with your hair and teeth. But you seem to have forgotten about it the instant Madam Pomfrey took away your chipmunk appearance and Viktor Krum asked you to the Yule Ball. Now you're just as stuck up as if you'd been born that way. You and your Chaser boyfriend.'

Hermione was exasperated. 'What do you want from me, Marietta?'

'I want an apology. I want you to acknowledge that the punishment exceeded the crime. I knew I'd be exposed for talking to Umbridge—you warned us about that. You didn't say I'd be disfigured for life, if not for a Muggle dermatologist and his laser.'

Hermione sighed. 'You're right. I didn't provide fair warning. I'm sorry about that.'

Marietta's expression softened. 'And I'm sorry I betrayed the D.A. That was an awful year at Hogwarts.'

'It was,' agreed Hermione.

They were both silent for a while until Marietta said, 'I'm sorry I called you ugly just now. I know how much that word hurts.'

'So do I,' said Hermione, thinking of her old tormentors. 'I should probably go help Harry. I'm glad Cho brought you, and I hope you enjoy the party.'

'Thank you. Perhaps I will ... there are a lot of wizards here from other schools.'

After parting from Marietta, Hermione went downstairs to the sitting room and repeated her Chocolate Frogs announcement, to the same friendly laughter she'd received upstairs.

'I'm relieved to hear it,' said Zacharias Smith. 'I've never worshipped Potter the way so many others do, but I thought he at least had better taste than that. But you must admit it's awfully funny.'

Hermione didn't like Zacharias but she couldn't argue. 'I'm sure he'll have a good laugh about it afterwards. He's just a bit high-strung right now, with hosting the party. It was a big leap of faith, you know.'

'What, exposing all his classmates to a vampire?'

'What are you talking about?'

'Over there,' he said, motioning towards the sofa.

'Oh, that must be Alistair. He's not a typical vampire.'

'So you're saying those two people next to him aren't thralls? Look at them ... they're completely mesmerised.'

The man she assumed was Alistair was bookended by a man and woman in their twenties. Both of them were pale and dressed in severe black robes, with expressions bordering on ecstasy. Alistair turned to the woman and ran his finger along her neck, causing her to close her eyes and shudder.

'Yes, I'm certain they're thralls. But that means Alistair can't affect the rest of us—he's expending all his charisma on them.'

'How did Harry even meet a vampire?' asked Zacharias. 'Surely not playing for the Cannons.'

Hermione knew the answer—at a decadent bar in Knockturn Alley—but she didn't need to share that detail. 'I don't know,' she said. 'You'd have to ask Harry. But personally I'd like to meet him—I can't imagine when I'll have another opportunity to talk to a vampire without danger. He was in Gryffindor, you know.'

'Really? Now that is interesting. May I accompany you?'

Hermione wasn't sure which was more surprising—that she was willingly approaching a vampire or that she was willingly conversing with Zacharias Smith. 'Yes, of course.'

They walked towards the sofa and Alistair rose. His thralls remained seated. 'You are Hermione Granger,' he said simply. 'It is a pleasure to meet you.'

She didn't extend her hand but said, 'I'm glad to meet you as well. You made quite an impression on Harry.'

Alistair nodded and said, 'Won't you sit down?' He tilted his chin towards one of the thralls, who immediately fetched two chairs.

Hermione and Zacharias took their seats and Alistair continued. 'I admit I've been curious to meet you. Setting aside Harry's erstwhile link with Lord Voldemort, I don't think there's any other person he's more deeply connected to.'

She thought for a moment and said, 'You may be right. Certainly no one living.'

'Yes, and even amongst his dead, the only one who comes close is his mother.'

'Comes close? Are you saying Harry and I are more deeply connected than he is with his mother?'

'I am.'

'Forgive me, but I think you've got your facts mixed up. Not only did Harry's mother give him life, she also protected him from Voldemort's Killing Curse by sacrificing her own life.'

'Yes, but that's a mother's instinct. You and Harry, on the other hand, have saved each other again and again based on a deeper impulse.'

'No we haven't. It's always been friendship, or even a family bond, considering he's like a brother to me.'

'But he's not your brother.'

'I know that.'

'Do you?'

She rolled her eyes. 'Have you been reading Rita Skeeter? Why does everyone insist on pairing Harry and me? That's not our relationship and never has been.'

'As you say. But back to my point ... are you familiar with the concept of a life debt?'

'Of course. A life debt is a magical bond between a witch or wizard and the person whose life they saved.'

'Exactly. So you must realise that you and Harry are connected by multiple life debts.'

'I suppose we are. Ever since he helped protect me from a troll in our first year.'

'You make it sound like that was the first time.'

'Wasn't it?'

'No. Life debts don't just disappear when a person dies.'

Hermione frowned. 'No offence, but you're talking like a Seer, and I've never been very impressed by Seers. Divination is mostly just guesswork and patter.'

'I've never been impressed by them either. They occasionally get it right, but prophecies are just uncontrolled manifestations of an otherwise very stable phenomenon.'

'What phenomenon is that?'

'Interconnectedness.'

She understood what he meant on an instinctual level but was frustrated by her inability to conceptualise it. 'And what makes you an expert?'

'Time and experience, mostly. And the fact that I've remained Light.'

'A Light vampire?' scoffed Zacharias.

The two thralls jerked towards him, but Alistair raised his hands to stay them. 'I needn't prove my credentials. But yes.'

'So Harry and I are interconnected?'

'Everyone is interconnected. But you and Harry are tightly bound even at the level of appearances. Do not underestimate it. You've already seen what you are able to do together, after all.'

Hermione nodded. 'Does this have anything to do with why I was sent to Hogwarts rather than one of the other schools?'

'At its root, yes.'

'I was told the Department of Mysteries makes the decision.'

Alistair chuckled and said, 'The inverse, more like. But there's no point trying to understand it from an ordinary vantage point. Just the same as how Harry didn't need to understand why the prophecy existed. He just needed to live it.'

'So there was a prophecy!' exclaimed Zacharias.

'Of course there was,' snapped Hermione. 'Otherwise why would Voldemort try to kill Harry as a baby? But the details aren't important,' she said, mostly to protect Neville.

Alistair rose. 'You don't need to speak any longer with me. I'm just a spectator, whereas you're one of the principal players. I've enjoyed our conversation, but I'd much prefer you keep things in motion.'

Hermione and Zacharias both stood up, and she said, 'It's been interesting meeting you—I can see why Harry asked you to come.'

'Yes, I'm glad he did. He's a remarkable young wizard.'

Hermione saw Zacharias scowl, but he didn't comment as they walked away. 'I need another drink,' he said, heading up the stairs.

She peeked in the kitchen, expecting only to see house-elves, but two very pretty witches were at the table. 'Excuse me, I'm just spreading the word that Harry didn't realise the Chocolate Frogs all contained his card.'

The young women laughed. 'Yes, we've heard. Poor Harry,' said one of them fondly.

'Do you know him, then?'

'Yes, I'm Helena.'

'Oh! I was hoping I'd meet you—I'm Hermione.'

Helena smiled. 'I know. And this is Vanessa ... will you join us?'

'I'd enjoy that, but I'm supposed to spread the word about the Chocolate Frogs and I haven't been above the drawing room yet.'

'We already spread the word upstairs, and your boyfriend made an announcement on the roof. So please, have a seat if you like.'

'Yes, thanks,' said Hermione as she sat down. 'Helena, I really don't know anything about you except that Harry seems awfully taken with you.'

'I'm rather fond of him as well. He's nothing like what I expected.'

'What were you expecting?'

'I had no idea he was so witty, for one thing. And he's terribly sweet. I knew he had a good heart, of course, but I'd imagined it was more broadly noble and not so personal.'

'It's always been personal for him. Broad nobility is too abstract, and Harry's very concrete.'

'Yes. And he's also terribly vulnerable. It breaks my heart, really. I'd expected someone larger than life, but in some respects he's just a little boy. Not all respects, mind you,' she added, with a playful look towards Vanessa.

Oh my, thought Hermione. Is my mind in the gutter, or does Helena have something very special planned for Harry's birthday?

'If you don't mind my asking, why aren't you with him right now? I know he'd like nothing more than to be dancing with you, or to introduce you to our friends.'

Helena sighed. 'I wish that were possible—I'd like that as well. It's difficult being apart from him. But there are so many people here, and he's incapable of not attracting attention. That's probably why he needs his Deathly Hallow—it's the only thing powerful enough to hide him.'

'I've never thought of it that way, but you're right. I gather you're not keen on being in the spotlight.'

'I've nothing against my own spotlight,' said Helena. 'But I'm not interested in someone else's.'

'That's unavoidable with Harry. It's been like that for Ron and me since we first became friends with him. But I don't think it's a reason to avoid him altogether.'

'No, of course not. But we're so young, and he's just discovering the world. I know he's fond of me, but there's no chance I'm going to be his one true love for all time. At best I'd be his girlfriend for six months or so, and then I wouldn't be any longer, but it would dog me for the rest of my life. I could discover twelve more uses for dragons' blood, but I'd still be known as that witch who dated Harry Potter.'

Hermione sighed. As much as she wanted Harry to be happy, she couldn't find the flaw in Helena's statement.

'It's a terrible shame,' continued Helena. 'He's simply lovely, truly everything a girl could want. And then there's the part of me that wants to protect him, the way he protected all of us. But that's not something that can happen from the outside.'

Helena glanced around to make sure nobody was listening. 'He has nightmares. All the time. I don't usually wake him—I just hold him or stroke him until he settles down again. And he curls into me just like a child, and I want to cry because I know he's never had that kind of comfort, except maybe from Ginny when they were together.'

And it nearly devoured her, thought Hermione.

'The one real gift I've been able to provide is normalcy,' said Helena, 'and I think that's all he can accept right now. Obviously he's never going to have a normal life, between the Cannons and the Prophet and everything else. But he can at least go out dancing and look dashing in robes and have sex for hours and all the rest. Thank heaven he quit the Ministry—the last thing he needs is to think about Dark wizards for the rest of his life.'

'Yes, you're right,' said Hermione. 'I thought he'd lost his mind when he told me he'd decided to quit his job and play Quidditch, but in hindsight it was a stroke of genius.'

Helena studied Hermione for a moment and then asked, 'Why were you and he never a couple? I know you and Ron Weasley were together for a long while, but why were you never interested Harry to begin with? I don't get the impression he dated much at Hogwarts.'

'Everyone asks me that, but he's always just felt like a brother to me. And it's the same for him—always has been. We're both only children, and we were each lonely for different reasons when we first met, so I think that's just how the bond formed.'

'Maybe it's better that way,' said Helena. 'As his friend you're less likely to leave him. Oh, he breaks my heart—he's such a dear.'

Hermione smiled at her. 'I'm glad I ran into you, Helena. I suppose we're the two most important women in his life right now, so it's only right we should meet.'

'I feel like I met you already, on Harry's and my first night together. I assume he told you about the Howler circumstances.'

The Howler circumstances? thought Hermione with alarm. 'No, he didn't say a word about it. All he said was that I didn't awaken him.'

'That's true, he was definitely awake. Poor Harry, such a gentleman—I'm so sorry I've blown his cover. But no, he was decidedly occupied when it arrived.'

Hermione's eyes widened and she raised her hand to her mouth. 'Not ... during?' Helena nodded, and Hermione burst into guilty laughter.

'I'm sure you can imagine my reaction. Here I thought he was an upstanding young wizard, if you can get past the part where he'd just brought me home from a bar, and then Hermione Granger starts shouting at him about owning a slave and abusing him. I was afraid I'd been lured into Bluebeard's castle.'

Hermione was still laughing. 'That might be even worse than the Chocolate Frog debacle. How long did it take him to convince you he wasn't a monster?'

'Not long at all—we were able to pick up where we'd left off, and of course we had a good laugh about it later. He's terribly fun to mock, I'm afraid, but he seems to enjoy it.'

'I imagine he would, if it's done kindly.'

'I hope I could never be unkind to him—he's such a dear.'

'I'm glad you appreciate his good qualities,' said Hermione. 'I'm a little scared he'll turn into a commodity, as far as witches are concerned. Someone to be seen with, someone to spoil them and boost their ego. At Hogwarts, girls used to throw themselves at him all the time—he wasn't being entirely selfless when he hired charmed goblets for the party.'

'Oh god, did that ever happen to him in school?' asked Helena, horrified.

'No, but not for lack of effort. He managed to dodge them, but it was a near thing.'

'Thank goodness that never happened to him—he's had enough trauma.'

Hermione nodded soberly. 'I tend to forget about all his trauma. He's so good at hiding it, and the only parts he talks about are the things we experienced together. He's barely breathed a word to me about his family, for example. Has he said anything to you?'

'No, except to say there's a reason he never talks about them.'

'I met his cousin a few weeks ago—the one he grew up with.'

'His spoilt Muggle doppelgänger?'

'No, they don't look at all alike—you'd never guess they were related. Apparently he's improved, but he was a great bully growing up and I think he used Harry as a punching bag.'

Helena shook her head. 'It's just unthinkable. How is it possible that so many people have wanted to hurt him?'

'I know, I have the same reaction. It was awful in school, when the other students were so cruel to him.'

'And how many of those students are here tonight?' asked Helena bitterly.

'Quite a few, except for the marked Death Eaters of course. He really wants to bring people together, regardless of their past.'

'I suppose it wasn't enough to end the war,' said Helena. 'He wants to prevent the next one as well.'

'You're right—I never thought of it like that. Wizards really are horrible, aren't they?'

Hermione noticed that Vanessa was nodding vigorously. 'Yes, they are,' she said emphatically. 'They should require pure-bloods to intermarry every few generations.'

'Nobody's stopping you,' said Helena, before turning back to Hermione. 'Vanessa's as pure-blooded as they come, and her family is riddled with Death Eater sympathisers.'

'It's ghastly,' said Vanessa. 'Even now they're sceptical of Harry—they don't think he's trustworthy. Although none of them complained when he took down the lords.'

'How did you turn out differently, if I might ask?' said Hermione.

'I have no idea—I think I was just born contrary. My brother as well, thank Merlin.'

'I got to know Vanessa and her brother Marcus during the war—they helped with our charmed trunk operation.' She explained to Hermione how her family produced and distributed dozens of magical trunks to protect Muggle-borns. 'Marcus was particularly useful, because he worked for the Muggle-Born Registration Commission. He was able to forewarn people and get them in touch with my family.'

Hermione was deeply impressed. 'That's remarkable ... I wish we'd known at the time how many people were resisting. We felt so alone, you know.'

'Yes, that's what Harry told me. I'm so glad you're bringing people from different schools together—that old headmaster deserves to rot in hell for meddling like that.'

'I'd invite you to tell him off yourself, but he's been avoiding his frame ever since Harry interrogated him. You should have seen it—Harry was practically wielding lightning as he spoke.'

'I'd have loved to witness that. We were hassled at a nightclub last weekend by an oversized Muggle, and Harry took him down with just a few words. And not incantations, mind you.'

'That would have fun to watch, but I suspect I'd have been a third wheel.'

'Perhaps you would have been,' said Helena warmly. 'But don't let us keep you any longer ... you've no reason to be hiding tonight.'

'I hope you won't just hole yourselves up in the kitchen all night!'

'No, I want to see my friend Rebecca. She's here with George Weasley—they met the same night Harry and I did. And after that perhaps Vanessa and I will hide on the dance floor for a while. I was there briefly to make the Chocolate Frogs announcement and it's a madhouse, in a good way.'

'I should go there myself,' said Hermione, standing. 'I'm so pleased I met both of you. I'm sorry you won't be more of a fixture, Helena, but I think you've been good for Harry all the same.'

'I hope so. I've certainly enjoyed being with him, and I'll tacitly spread the word that he's a good egg.'

They hugged one another and Hermione went back upstairs, stopping next in the entrance hall. 'Annie! I'm so glad to see you. Are you having a good time?'

'Yes, this is a wonderful party.' She was with friends but turned away from them to talk with Hermione.

'Did you meet Harry yet?'

'No, I poked into the drawing room earlier and he was mobbed, so I decided to let him be. I imagine I'll meet him through Ryan some other time.'

'That was kind of you,' said Hermione. 'He's happy to meet the newcomers, but I suspect he's not having much fun at his own party. And then there was the Chocolate Frogs disaster ... you heard about that, right?'

'Yes, how mortifying! But everyone's had a good laugh about it, and I think it served as an icebreaker.'

'That's a silver lining. Have you seen much of Ryan tonight?'

'I saw him earlier on the rooftop, but the rest of us decided to head downstairs for a while. I can't get over the food ... where did all these house-elves come from?'

'They're on loan from Hogwarts,' said Hermione, with a hint of disapproval. 'They jumped at the opportunity, apparently.'

'They're a stitch! Before tonight I'd never seen more than one or two at a time, but here's an entire company of them. And the flowers—was that your idea?'

'No, that was Harry's. Everyone normally complains about how gloomy the house is.'

'I don't think anyone's complaining tonight,' said Annie. 'Have you noticed all the couples forming in dark corners? It seems the combination of threadbare opulence and young wizards in form-fitting robes wearing flowers is a powerful aphrodisiac. Is it true Harry just tucked some flowers in his buttonhole on a whim before the party?'

'Yes, our friend Luna spontaneously made him a boutonnière from lilies, in honour of his mother.'

'He's started another rage, all the wizards want them now. I think he's become the arbiter of postwar fashion.'

'Unbelievable,' said Hermione. 'Before he got his team robes I don't think he ever gave a second thought to what he wore.'

Annie was about to ask another question when she stopped herself. 'I'm sorry, I'm engaging in one of my biggest pet peeves: pressing you for information about Harry, the same way people to do me about Ryan.'

'Yes, I've experienced that since our first year at Hogwarts. And I suppose it's been that way for you since Ryan joined the Cannons?'

'No, long before that,' said Annie. 'You're forgetting he was the school heartthrob, and loads of girls saw me as their inside track.'

'Oh dear, that can't have been pleasant.'

'No, but at the same time it made me feel special, like I had a better chance than they did, since I actually knew him.'

'If you don't mind my asking, how were you able to get over him in the end?'

Annie looked up from her drink and said, 'It was at the end of our fifth year, and the summer afterwards. My crush had reached a fever pitch by then, and rampant hormones didn't help matters. I'd come to idealise him to the point where my version of him hardly resembled reality. But then ... something traumatic happened to him. I didn't know the details at the time, but I could see something was wrong. And that humanised him somehow, eliciting my compassion in a way that finally knocked me out of my fantasies.

'One afternoon that summer we went on a walk near some ruins, and we sat down and had a long talk that somehow closed the door on my old feelings. We didn't even talk about my crush, which of course we'd discussed at length previously. But I think our relationship matured that afternoon into the fullness of friendship and not just the old muddle it had been, for me at least.'

Hermione said, 'The traumatic event ... I assume you're referring to the Love Potion?'

Annie nodded. 'Yes. I didn't know whether he'd told you about it. I'm glad he did, in part because it means he's past his old feelings of shame.'

'I couldn't believe he'd felt it was somehow his fault,' said Hermione, 'but when he explained the nuances I understood how he'd reached that conclusion, even though it was invalid.'

'It was awful when he first told me, when we were eighteen or so. You'd think he was confessing to a horrible crime he'd committed—he couldn't even look at me. At first he could barely get the words out, but I think it helped that we were in his new flat and there was music playing, because he could periodically stop talking and allow the music to centre him.'

'Yes, he told me how helpful you were, and that you persuaded him to see a Mind Healer.'

'And thank goodness he did,' said Annie. 'It made such a difference. He was terrified to tell his parents, you know. What did you think of them, by the way?'

'I'm glad you warned me about Lucinda! I thought she was fantastic, and Walter as well, but I could easily have been thrown off balance.'

'I find that hard to believe; you're more than her match. Which of course makes you a good fit for Ryan.'

'Oh dear, are you saying I'm fulfilling some Oedipal role for him?'

'Good lord, no—you're nothing like Lucinda in that respect. But consider how different you are to the usual C-squared.'

'C-squared?'

'Chaser chaser. The kind of witch who Spellotapes Ryan's team photograph next to her bathtub and finds a lot of excuses to pick up items from the floor around him. Sorry, I assumed you'd heard the term before.'

'No, but I suspect I'll be hearing it from now on. Is that what people think I am?'

'Not even close! I doubt any C-squareds have been awarded the Order of Merlin, First Class, for example. You're probably the despair of most C-squareds. Ryan's anyway.'

'Are they organised? You make them sound like a club.'

'Not at all. But you may have observed that a higher percentage of his autograph seekers are witches, and they generally change out of Cannons orange before turning up.'

'I didn't even notice.'

'That's probably good—means you're not territorial. But you've nothing to worry about, of course.'

Hermione sighed. She wasn't worried about Ryan straying—if he could survive Gabrielle, surely he could handle a C-squared—but she didn't like being the focus of their envy or ire. 'Thanks for the warning. But here I've done exactly what you don't like, pressing you for information about Ryan. I feel I should make it up to you—is there anything about Harry you want to know?'

Annie laughed and said, 'I'm sure there are numerous sources in the building, and I expect to meet him myself anyway, so I won't bother you. Have you seen much of Ryan tonight?'

'No, not since the guests arrived.'

'Then why on earth are you talking to me? Get thee to the roof without delay!'

'I will. But I'm glad I ran into you—I hope we can see each other again soon.'

They hugged and Hermione made her way upstairs. When she reached the fourth floor and began climbing the narrow staircase to the attic, her path was impeded by Sally-Ann Perks.

'Are you all right?' asked Hermione. 'Do you need a comfortable place to sit down?'

'No, this spot suits me just fine,' said Sally-Ann.

Puzzled, Hermione said, 'If you insist, but I'd hate for someone to trip on you.'

'I'm very observant, so I don't think that will happen. But thanks for your concern.'

Hermione continued to the rooftop, where she emerged to find a topologically improbable number of people dancing. She scanned for Ryan's head above the crowd—he was only a couple of inches shorter than Ron—but she didn't see him anywhere. But then she spotted him crouching near the stereo.

'Ryan,' she shouted, not wanting to sneak up on him.

He looked up, and she was transported by his expression of delight. 'Hermione, finally! Have you been greeting guests with Harry this whole time?'

'No, but there was the Chocolate Frog debacle, and then I got sidetracked. But I'm here now ... how are you doing?'

He was having trouble hearing her, so he led her to the comparatively quiet area he'd charmed, off to the side. 'I'm sorry, what were you saying?'

'I asked how you were doing.'

He smiled. 'I've missed you, of course, but you can imagine how much I've enjoyed exposing your classmates to decent music. It's like watching a newborn foal standing up on spindly legs but then take off into a gallop.'

She followed his gaze to the dance floor, where she saw masses of the Hogwarts guests dancing enthusiastically. Neville appeared to be having a particularly good time, jumping about and lifting Hannah into the air at intervals.

'I've never seen a group so starved for Britpop,' he continued. 'Just you wait ... I can guarantee that within minutes someone is going to ask me to play "Girls and Boys" again.'

'Isn't that the one about rampant casual sex amongst holidaymakers?'

'Yes, and it appears to have set the tone. I don't know what things are like downstairs, but it's a veritable bacchanal up here. Someone discovered the house-elves can be summoned for food and alcohol, which means every need is being met. How many guest rooms does Harry have anyway?'

'We've never been certain,' said Hermione. 'As far as I've discovered, the answer to that question is always "one more."'

'I see. In any case, this bodes well for wizarding Britain's post-war repopulation effort.'

'Apparently. Do you suppose this is an aspect of the uni experience we've missed?'

'Undoubtedly. Shall we seize the opportunity?'

Having completed her hostess duties, she accepted a glass of beer from a house-elf, and before long she was entangled on the dance floor with Ryan. She knew it would have been more appropriate to dance apart from him, particularly during the fast songs, but she found she couldn't keep her hands off him very long.

They were regularly interrupted with requests, often but not exclusively for the song Ryan had mentioned, but otherwise she was able to enjoy a long stretch of dancing with her boyfriend. Has it really only been two weeks? she thought. And only three weeks since Ron and I split up?

Eventually they returned to the quiet area for a break from all the dancing. 'Have you managed to converse with anyone?' she asked.

'Yes—quite a few Hogwarts people introduced themselves, either as friends of yours or Cannons fans. Though there was one witch I'm not certain how to classify.'

'Do you remember her name?'

'Romilda something. She said she was in Gryffindor and that she and Harry were great friends, and that she was a huge Cannons fan as well. She didn't seem very receptive when I kept mentioning you, but then she asked me a question about the music and you know how I get when that happens. Eventually she became a bit ... tactile, so I made my excuses and left.'

'Oh dear, I should have warned you about her. First off, no, she's not a good friend of Harry's. He didn't even invite her to the party because in our sixth year she gave him a box of Chocolate Cauldrons spiked with a Love Potion, which he didn't eat, thank goodness, but Ron ate them months later and got the full blast of it. Fortunately Romilda was nowhere nearby, and Harry dragged him to the Potions professor for an antidote.'

Ryan paled. 'I hope she's given up the habit.'

'I have no idea, but she was almost certainly the inspiration behind the charmed goblets.'

They talked for a while longer before Ginny appeared, along with Blaise Zabini and a witch Hermione didn't recognise. 'Hermione,' said Ginny, 'I'm surprised you finally took a break from dancing—you seemed to be enjoying it so much.'

'Yes,' said Blaise, 'I think you demonstrated that the photograph in last week's Prophet wasn't staged.'

'Why would anyone think it was staged?' asked Hermione, somewhat astonished to be conversing with Blaise Zabini.

'That was Draco's theory.' He looked at Ryan and added, 'Draco Malfoy is one of our Death Eater classmates, currently under house arrest.' Turning towards Hermione, he said, 'Draco decided that you and Harry cooked up the scheme together, to distract the public from your own torrid affair. According to the theory, Harry tapped Bellamy because he's the most newsworthy Cannon, other than himself.'

'I'm glad to hear he's making the most of his two-year sentence,' said Hermione dryly. 'It sounds like he's doing some real soul-searching.'

'If by "soul-searching" you mean committing folie à deux entirely on his own, then yes, he's doing all sorts of soul-searching,' said Blaise. 'So did you really throw Ron Weasley over for Bellamy? If so, he seems to be recovering all right.' He indicated Ron and Janet, who had given up all pretence of dancing and were snogging in plain view.

Ginny looked at them appraisingly and said, 'It looks like Ron's technique has improved a bit since his Lavender days. Well done!'

Choosing to ignore Ginny's comment, Hermione said, 'No, that was the Prophet living up to its usual standard. Ron was the first to realise that he and I weren't suited to one another. It came as a shock, naturally, but I'm grateful he figured it out before we were in too deep.'

'You mean before you were trapped in a marriage bond? I know Ginny dodged that curse as well,' said Blaise. 'I've never understood why magicals marry so young. It seems like a perfect way to stunt one's development, locking oneself down at the age of nineteen.'

Ginny rolled her eyes. 'Blaise is an expert on matrimony. Which husband is your mother up to now?'

'Yes, laugh all you like,' retorted Blaise. 'I happen to have far more dead fathers than Harry does.'

'I'm sorry, what?' said Hermione.

'Oh, you didn't hear about it,' said Ginny. 'Harry was drunk and chatty a while ago. Kept talking about having three dead fathers.'

Hermione shot Ginny a concerned look. 'Drunk and chatty?'

'Don't worry, he's squared away.'

'Triangled, more like,' said Blaise. 'Two witches.'

Hermione felt a hint of satisfaction that she'd assessed things correctly. 'I suppose if anyone deserves a good birthday, it's Harry.'

'Have you met her?' asked Ginny. 'Helena, that is—not the plus-one.'

'Yes, we talked for a while in the kitchen. Lovely person.'

Blaise started asking Ryan about the music, which predictably ensnared him, leaving Hermione with Ginny and her friend.

'I'm sorry, have we met?' asked Hermione.

'My fault!' said Ginny. 'Hermione, this is Wendy. Wendy, Hermione. She's one of my Harpies teammates.'

Warm greetings were exchanged, and Hermione asked, 'Have you been on the team long?'

'I started last year but I'm still a reserve Chaser, just like Ginny.'

'I learnt a new expression today,' said Hermione. 'C-squared ... are you familiar with it?'

Ginny laughed. 'I'm not surprised you heard that one. Obviously you're not a good example, but I'm certain Ryan has been bombarded with them over the years.'

'Are there C-squareds amongst the Harpies fans?'

Wendy said, 'It's a bit different for the Harpies, since we're all witches. The stereotypical C-squared is female and heterosexual, so in that respect the Harpies haven't any. But we attract a different following, both among witches and wizards.'

'I imagine a lot of the wizards objectify the players,' said Hermione.

'Yes, there's some of that, but not as much as you'd think,' replied Wendy. 'Certainly some of the male fans are only there for the cleavage, but a much larger portion appreciate the powerful female warrior aspect. And of course the Harpies have a strong lesbian following as well.'

'Yes, I imagine they would. When do you play the Cannons next?'

'Sometime in September,' said Ginny. 'But there's no chance I'll play.'

Wendy shook her head. 'I'm not so sure about that. They may want you in there to rattle Harry, particularly now that his main strategy is ramming into Chasers.'

'Did someone say "ramming into Chasers?"' asked Blaise. 'Yes, please!'

Ginny swatted him and said, 'Give it up. It's not going to happen. You'll have to find another filthy little blood traitor.'

'You're never going to let me live that down, will you?'

'Never,' she grinned. 'You've made your bed, and I'm not going to lie in it.'

Hermione was thirsty, so she wandered over to the area that had become a de-facto bar. She didn't see any house-elves, but there were a lot of used goblets on top of the parapet.

'Do you need a drink?' asked Sally-Ann. 'I can't finish this bottle of fruit pressé that the house-elves gave me.' She held up a half-full bottle.'

'That would be ideal, thank you,' said Hermione, taking the bottle. She used her wand to clean one of the goblets and filled it.

The goblet turned black. Hermione turned accusingly towards Sally-Ann, who simply said, 'Oops.'

Hermione pulled her wand out to immobilise her, but Sally-Ann was too quick—she stepped over the boundary to the neighbouring rooftop and immediately Disapparated.

Rushing to Ginny, Ryan, and the others, Hermione held up the glass and said, 'Someone just tried to give me Veritaserum.' They all looked in the direction from which Hermione had come. 'No, she already Disapparated.'

'Who was it?' asked Ginny.

'On the surface of things, Sally-Ann Perks.'

'Who?'

Hermione shook her head. 'An exceedingly shy Hufflepuff who'd politely declined Harry's invitation. Damn, I should have known! She had to have been Rita Skeeter.'

'Rita Skeeter!' exclaimed Ginny. 'And she was here all night?'

'Yes,' said Hermione, scowling. 'She must have found out somehow that Sally-Ann Perks wasn't coming and stolen her invitation, and some hair for Polyjuice Potion.'

'What's the big deal?' asked Blaise. 'Harry couldn't have expected everyone to stay quiet about what happened tonight. Someone was bound to blab to the press.'

'Yes, but that's not the same as Rita Skeeter having a front-row seat for hours.' Hermione looked at them, horrified. 'Oh my god, she was sitting on the staircase right near Harry's room. It was the perfect spot, both to monitor traffic to and from the roof and also to see who Harry went to bed with.'

'Two witches,' said Blaise admiringly. 'I know what tomorrow's headline is going to be.'

'Oh no—Helena,' said Hermione. 'She specifically doesn't want her name linked with Harry's. Did any of you hear her surname?'

'Yes,' said Blaise. 'Daphne said it was Strauss.'

'Ugh ... what do we do?' asked Hermione, looking up at Ryan.

'I'm not sure there's anything we can do,' he said. 'I don't see what you'll accomplish by interrupting Harry right now.'

With mock sternness, Blaise pointed his wand. 'I will duel anyone who tries to interrupt Harry. In my opinion, interrupting a threesome is a crime worthy of Azkaban—on a man's birthday, no less. No, absolutely not.' He shook his head for added emphasis.

'You've made your point,' said Ginny. 'But he's right, there's nothing we can do. Unless one of you has a controlling interest in the Prophet, I think we just have to wait. But we should at least slip a letter beneath the door to warn them.'

'Howlers,' said Hermione. 'Helena might receive Howlers.'

'Bugger, you're right,' said Ginny. 'Do you have any idea where she lives?'

'No, only that her family makes magical trunks.'

'Strauss Leather Goods, in Northampton?' asked Blaise. 'That has to be it—Strauss isn't a common name here.'

Hermione shook her head. 'We can't just turn up at her family business in the middle of the night and tell them their daughter's in the midst of a threesome with Harry Potter and that it's going to be all over the Prophet tomorrow.'

'We could owl them a warning,' suggested Ryan. 'Tell them there's a high likelihood they'll receive unwanted owls tomorrow after the Prophet comes out. I can go send that now if you like—Northampton isn't far from Cambridge.'

'Do we think that's a good idea?' asked Hermione, turning to the group, and everyone nodded. She gave Ryan a quick embrace and said, 'Come back soon.'

'Should we tell Ron?' asked Ginny. Ron was still on the dance floor with Janet, although they were actually dancing again.

'Yes, good idea.'

Ginny looked her in the eye. 'Is that all right?'

'Of course, it's fine. We've both moved on, and there was never any ill will.'

Ron and Janet were fetched and brought up to speed. 'Blimey, that was Rita Skeeter the whole time?'

'Yes,' said Hermione. 'Do you recall what Harry may have said in front of her?'

'Er, he was fairly chatty.'

'Anything confidential?'

'No, nothing like that,' said Ron, and Hermione and Ginny both exhaled. 'But she asked how much the party cost, and he said he hadn't a clue and that it didn't matter anyway.'

Hermione sighed. 'Well, it's no secret Harry's well off, particularly now that he's the Black heir. Anything else?'

'Just the thing about three dead fathers, and how much he was looking forward to shagging Helena.'

Blaise sniggered and said, 'Harry's going to have more fans than ever. In the space of a week he's taken down the lords, caught the Snitch for the Cannons, and had a threesome. In retrospect, Voldemort never had a chance.'

Hermione smiled in spite of herself. 'I think he'll survive this. But it'll be a shame if it hastens the end between him and Helena. That'll hopefully be the worst of it though.'

'Wrong,' said Janet. 'This will be prime taunting material.'

Wendy looked up and said, 'Bugger, you're right. It must be terrible for him already. Who do the Cannons play next?'

'Magpies,' said Ron. 'Harry's fucked—Gilstrap is notorious.'

Wendy turned towards Janet. 'You're going to have to prepare him. You and your teammates.'

Ron laughed and said, 'There's another task you were born for, Janet. Take the piss out of Harry all week, for the good of the team.'

Ryan returned soon after, and everyone decided to start dancing again. Eventually he and Hermione were ready to leave, and on the way downstairs they stopped on the third floor, where the bedrooms were.

He peered down the corridor and said, 'It appears that "one more" is a very high number. Do you think people are planning to stay the night?'

'I couldn't even say. Hopefully most of them will tiptoe down to the fireplace in the wee hours.'

'Do you suppose there will be a lot of babies christened "Harry" nine and a half months from now?'

'Anything's possible,' she said as she prepared a note for Harry and Helena. But when she tried sliding it under the door it wouldn't go. 'Blast, it's the goblin wards. Not even a note can get through. I'll have to send him a Patronus in the morning before the Prophet arrives.'

'That won't be pleasant—normally the Prophet arrives around seven o'clock, or maybe half past.'

Hermione sighed. 'Not to worry. I'm no Seer, but something tells me it'll be a late edition.'