For perhaps the first time in her life, Hermione found it difficult to concentrate on her work. Her team at the Ministry had reached the same conclusion as Bill Weasley—that the goblins were perfectly happy to move forward as long as they could be bribed sufficiently. So the next step was to see how much goblin-made treasure could be shaken loose from the Ministry stores.
This left Hermione free to research her other pet projects, such as house-elf regulations and Ministry hiring practices, but her thoughts kept turning towards a tall blond Chaser wearing football shorts and whispering sweet nothings about the laws of physics.
She kept checking her wristwatch, but the day crept along glacially. There was a bright spot at lunch, when she overheard people in the Ministry cafeteria talking about the Cannons match and how well Bellamy had played. Hearing another person mention his name reminded her that he was real and not just someone she'd imagined, as she might have done as a girl.
She was to meet Ryan that evening at his flat and go from there to dinner. It seemed likely they'd go somewhere exotic and Muggle, but she would have been equally happy to eat sandwiches with him on a park bench.
The workday finally ended, and she could barely stand still in the lift as it crawled towards the Atrium. Normally she travelled home by Floo, but the lines were long and she was impatient, so she Apparated instead. Her parents weren't home yet, and after she'd changed into a nice Muggle outfit and refreshed the charm on her hair, she went downstairs and turned on the stereo.
Ryan had loaned her several CDs, and she found she liked all of them. Furthermore, she was content just to immerse herself in the music and not distract herself with a book as she might have normally done. How had she never noticed all the complexity in music, even in a seemingly ordinary pop song? The emotion in the vocals, the satisfying chord progressions, and the jangle of the guitars transported her as never before.
She almost lost track of time, but her long habit of punctuality brought her to Ryan's flat at the appointed hour. He was standing on the hearth when she arrived.
'Is it wrong that I was hoping you'd stumble from the fireplace, just so I could catch you?' he asked.
'You can catch me regardless,' she said, and he took her into his arms.
After they'd greeted each other, she said, 'I can't believe how slowly today passed. I'd have sworn someone charmed my wristwatch to move backwards. I hope your day was a bit more invigorating.'
'Flying helps,' he said, 'and Harry unleashed some truly maniacal feints this afternoon, but I'll admit I was impatient as well.'
'I'm not certain I want to know about Harry's maniacal feints.'
'No, you might make me replicate them next time we're on a broom together.'
'Am I that frightening?' she asked.
'Terrifying,' he replied admiringly, and he kissed her again. 'But I've promised you dinner and conversation, so perhaps we should leave the flat.'
'If you insist,' she said, and his eyes momentarily widened. She couldn't help laughing and said, 'Where do you have in mind?'
'We've two options, both local. One is a Muggle Thai restaurant I go to all the time, and the other is a wizarding restaurant—Italian.'
'Local? I'm ashamed to admit I don't know where we are.'
'That's the hazard of magical transport, isn't it,' he said. 'But we're in Cambridge.'
'Really?' she said excitedly, turning towards the window.
'We're not at the city centre, so you won't see any spires. But both restaurants are there, so you'll see historic architecture soon enough.'
'Can we walk from here?'
'We could, but we'd have to cross some tedious ring roads. It would be pleasanter to Apparate to a secluded spot and start from there.'
'That sounds good,' she said, extending her hand. They were soon in an alleyway, and they continued holding hands as they walked through the narrow streets.
'So which restaurant would you prefer?' he asked.
'They both sound good,' she said. 'I suppose wherever it's easier to have a conversation.'
'Yes, that's always the challenge. In Muggle restaurants there's the secrecy concern, and in wizarding settings there's the risk of interruptions. Which I suppose will be infinitely worse now that you're here with me.' He paused and added, 'Sorry, that came out wrong.'
Hermione laughed and said, 'No, I understood your meaning.'
'But back to your question, the Italian restaurant is the better choice. It's darker than the Thai restaurant, and the tables aren't as near to one another.'
'All right then,' she said, looking up at him. 'Lead on.'
They ambled through the streets and he pointed out some of the famous buildings until they arrived at another alley. 'This is the problem with most wizarding establishments. The exteriors are invariably dreary, or downright unsavoury.'
'Yes,' she agreed, as they walked past a series of bins. 'But presumably it's nicer inside.'
'It is,' he said, pressing his wand to a rune that was disguised as a bit of graffiti. A large door came into existence, and Ryan opened it and ushered Hermione inside.
'Much better,' she said. The interior was spacious but intimate, with stairs leading down to a podium with a number of tables beyond. The host greeted them.
'Good evening ... table for two?' He looked warmly at both Ryan and Hermione but didn't acknowledge whether he'd recognised them.
'Yes, please,' said Ryan, and they were led around a corner to a small and very private booth.
When they were seated she said, 'This is lovely, and perfect for a conversation.'
'That's good,' he replied, 'because I want to hear all about you. You only provided the barest outlines at dinner on Saturday.'
'But you promised you'd tell me about your Muggle secret identity. I'm keen to learn about it, not least because I'd like ideas for how to reconnect with my own family.'
'All right,' he said. 'But first the menu.' They took time to review the menu and make their selections, and after the waiter left they started their conversation in earnest.
'Until I was eleven I didn't have to hide very much,' he said. 'I wasn't able to start school until I was nearly eight and could be trusted to keep a secret. I was also less prone to accidental magic by then, although my mother had to smooth over a few incidents.'
'And by smooth over you mean Obliviate?' asked Hermione.
'Yes. She hated doing it—still does—but the alternative was worse in her opinion.'
'What, home schooling?'
'That, or an ad-hoc school taught by a relatively unlettered parent. Not that you need a doctorate to teach eight-year olds, but I think it helps to have a teacher with a broader perspective on the world than most witches or wizards have.'
'Yes. I was appalled to discover how patchy the pre-Hogwarts education system seems to be.' She paused and corrected herself. 'I'm sorry, pre-wizarding school.'
'You're forgiven. It's not your fault your memory was tampered with all these years.'
'So you went to a Muggle primary school, and then you received your Widgington letter, or however it works?'
'Yes. My mother and most of her family attended Widgington, so it came as no surprise,' he explained. 'I had to tell my friends that my parents were switching me to a private school—fortunately my friends didn't question it. But several of my father's relations couldn't understand why my parents were paying for my education when there was a perfectly acceptable state school, so they were told it was for athletics. Which led to ongoing requests to attend my matches, until my mother had to start Confunding them.'
'Oh dear,' said Hermione. 'How did that work out?'
'Fortunately—or unfortunately, depending on how you look at it—the repeated charms eventually dampened their curiosity on the topic, and after a while my mother no longer had to interfere. But it weighs heavily on her that she may have caused some kind of permanent damage, albeit subtle.'
Hermione was too self-aware not to see the similarities with her own situation. She had often wished she could Confund her parents when they asked probing questions about her life at Hogwarts, but of course she'd been hampered by the Restriction on Underage Magic. So she'd lied instead.
'What did you tell people when you were eighteen? Did you tell them you went to university?'
'Yes,' he said sadly. 'It would have been out of character for me to just drop out. I'd become an avid reader, since that provided a lot of conversation fodder with my cousins, and it didn't seem likely I'd abandon my studies and work in a chip shop.'
'I can see that.'
'My primary school friends and football teammates went to uni as well, and we only saw each other during term breaks and holidays. So I told them I attended university in Durham, since none of them did, and I mainly got away with it.'
'Mainly?'
He sighed. 'My mate Liam—you'll meet him when you come see us play football—got pretty insistent about coming to visit me, and I had to Confund him. I've had to do that to several of my friends, and I've hated it. I'm always horrified when I hear wizards talk about casually Confunding ticket sellers and such.'
Hermione was feeling increasingly uncomfortable. It was a relief when their starters arrived, since they didn't need to talk for a while. She was even tempted to order a glass of wine, just to take the edge off.
'Are you all right?' asked Ryan. 'Did I say something to upset you? Unfortunately these aren't my proudest moments I'm describing, but I hope you won't hold them against me.'
'No, it's not that,' she said, looking down. 'Not the way you're thinking, anyway.'
He didn't say anything, and she felt terrible. What could he say? She took a deep breath and continued. 'I'm not judging you for what you've done. Not at all. The problem is that I've done far worse.'
Ryan reached for her hand across the table. 'Oh, Hermione. I'm so sorry. I wasn't thinking—I suppose you had to do some difficult things during the war, when you were on the run.'
He's probably imagining I Confunded ticket vendors or shopkeepers, she thought. 'Well yes, but that's not what I'm referring to ... I Obliviated my parents.'
She saw his eyes flicker with shock, but they were full of compassion. 'I'm certain you only did what was necessary.'
'I was thorough,' she continued, not wanting to hide the truth. 'I gave them new identities entirely. Made them forget they ever had a daughter and believe they were desperate to go live in Australia. It was the only way I knew to keep them safe.'
'And you succeeded,' he said emphatically. 'Not only that, you were able to help Harry without having to worry about them. I don't think it's a stretch to say that your decision may have influenced the entire outcome of the war.'
She relaxed a little until she realised she hadn't even told him the worst part. 'But even before that ... I lied to them for years. Flat-out, bold-faced lies—starting during my first term at Hogwarts. And it wasn't like your situation, with the Statute of Secrecy. My parents knew I was a witch, so that wasn't a factor. But I was terrified if they found out how much danger I was in that they'd make me leave Hogwarts and stop being magical. I didn't know there were other schools, after all.'
'Oh, Hermione,' said Ryan soothingly. He looked like he wanted to reach around the table and hold her.
'My first year I was nearly killed by a troll. And then in my second year I was petrified by a Basilisk. I couldn't tell my parents about that. Or that there were Dementors at Hogwarts, or that a mass murderer was after my best friend.'
'Exonerated,' said Ryan, and she smiled.
'Every year at Hogwarts it was one thing after another. And I never told them that Voldemort came back. If they'd known how much the Death Eaters hated people like me, they'd have moved us to Australia without my intervention. But I couldn't leave Harry and Ron. And so I lied. And I lied some more. And then I Obliviated my parents.'
'You did the right thing,' he said. 'And I'm not just saying that. Harry probably didn't tell you this, but Death Eaters killed my grandparents. My father's parents, because of me.'
She looked up at him. 'Oh, Ryan ... I'm so sorry.'
He shook his head. 'I can't tell you how many times I've wished I'd done something—anything—to protect them. If only I'd Obliviated them or exiled them to America or sent them on one of those horrible, year-long cruises. But we'd only thought to protect my father.'
'Do you know who did it, and whether it was ...' She was going to say 'quick' but thought better of it.
He shook his head. 'It's hard to say. It could have been any number of Death Eaters—someone who didn't like the Cannons, or didn't approve of an abomination like me playing for them. They left the Dark Mark overhead, and my grandparents ... their bodies ... looked frightened.'
She grasped both his hands across the table and looked at him with deep empathy. 'I'm so sorry,' she repeated. What else was there to say?
'We had to hide the rest of my family—my father's siblings, and my cousins. And we couldn't tell them the real reason. We told them my father had been targeted by terrorists because of his work, and then my mother Confunded and Compelled the living daylights out of various officials to get them relocated.
'Fortunately it was only a few more months before the war ended—thanks to you, Hermione, and to Harry. I hope you realise how many lives you saved. And if lying to your parents and Obliviating them is what made that possible, then I'm the last person to criticise you for it.'
Hermione was softly crying and unable to speak, prompting Ryan to conjure a handkerchief and hand it to her. She finally said, 'We should have sat next to each other and not across,' and her tears flowed faster.
In an instant he was by her side with his arm around her. 'Do you even know what a miracle you are, Hermione? I can't believe I met you, and that I'm holding you right now.'
She snuggled next to him and said, 'I feel the same way about you, Ryan.'
'Even though I'm an athlete.'
She laughed. 'Yes, even so.'
Their main course arrived, and although the booth was cramped they remained seated next to each other.
They ate for a while in silence, but then she turned to him and said, 'I tend to forget what other people went through during the war, or even minimise it. But we all had burdens and dark thoughts weighing us down.' She had thought nobody would understand what it was like to spend months with a Horcrux, but perhaps she'd been mistaken.
'I'm sure nobody's experience can compare to yours,' he began, but she shook her head.
'No, my point is that just because you were living in a house with food and not in a tent, or because you were busy protecting your family and not ... doing what Harry and Ron and I were doing, that doesn't mean we weren't going through the same fundamental experience, or part of the same struggle.'
She sighed and continued. 'I wish I'd known how many people there were like you. It really felt like there were just a handful of us resisting, and that we were alone. I can't tell you what a difference it made to hear Potterwatch that one time, to know that people still cared. Or the night we went to Godric's Hollow— which was a disaster, by the way—but at least we saw the messages people had left for Harry on the marker in front of his parents' house.'
'Hermione, you have no idea. We were desperate, and the only thing that gave us hope was seeing the Ministry try harder and harder to catch Harry, because that meant he was a threat. And same with you ... Undesirable Number Two.' He smiled. 'You looked mad cute in that poster, you know. You had a sort of scowl.'
'I'll be honest, when Ron and I split up, I didn't know how I'd find someone who could understand. Besides Harry, of course, but that's not how we see each other.'
'I know,' he admitted. 'I asked him whether he was going to pursue you now that you were single.'
'You really are absurdly gentlemanlike,' she laughed.
'Is that even a word?'
'Of course it is—Jane Austen used it. "Had you behaved in a more gentlemanlike manner,"' she quoted.
'How could I forget?' he laughed. 'But you must admit it's rather cumbersome.'
'I suppose it is. I could say Ryan-like, if you prefer.'
'I am undeniably Ryan-like. Or Bellamoid, alternatively.'
'That is such a Muggle joke,' she said. 'I love it.'
'Yet another example of what wizards are missing out on.'
They shared a dessert, and after leaving the restaurant they walked through more of the historic parts of Cambridge under the setting sun.
'If I hadn't been a witch I might have gone to university here. I certainly wanted to as a child.'
'Cambridge or Oxford, right?' he asked.
'Of course. I had already begun comparing the different colleges to determine which one was best. I even had a special notebook, in which I listed all the pros and cons.'
'And then your Hogwarts letter arrived and ruined everything?'
'Exactly. It's unfortunate there's no wizarding equivalent to the university system.'
'I agree,' he said. 'Growing up in Cambridge I longed for a uni experience, but I knew that was unlikely.'
'So you've had to console yourself by playing professional Quidditch?'
'For now, anyway. Obviously it's not a long-term career, but after I retire I might resume my studies.'
'What are you most interested in?'
'I'm probably strongest in Charms, being a Spoonwocket and all,' he said, and Hermione smiled. 'But I also like Arithmancy and Runes, and I think there's still a lot to be discovered where those fields intersect. In the meantime, I'm having fun playing for the Cannons, and it's a good way to save money for my future career as a mad scientist.'
It was nearly dark out, and she turned towards him. 'Just hearing you use expressions like "mad scientist" makes me realise how much I've missed this side of myself. Harry doesn't talk much about Muggle things, since his home life was so awful. And of course Ron doesn't know the first thing about the non-magical world and has no interest in learning about it.'
Ryan nodded. 'It's been the same for me. I've mainly dated half-bloods, but the kind who might as well be pure-bloods for all they know about the Muggle side of things. I've only introduced one girlfriend to my Muggle friends and relations, and that was years ago.'
'Are they growing suspicious?' she asked, smiling.
He nodded. 'My cousins and mates keep throwing their female friends into my path, which is awkward. I have nothing against dating Muggles in principle, but it would require a whole new set of lies and memory charms, and I couldn't be intimate with someone I had to lie to.'
His thumb was lightly stroking her hand, and Hermione felt herself beginning to melt, perhaps because he'd used the word 'intimate.'
'I'd like to return to your flat now if that's all right,' she said.
'Yes, of course.' He looked around to confirm they weren't being observed, and then Apparated them home.
His flat was dark, and he turned on the light. 'Would you like to stay a while?' he asked tentatively. She responded by leaning towards him and inclining her face upwards, and they stood kissing for a while.
'Could you put on some music?' she asked.
'Always,' he said, and he went to the shelves and selected an album. He placed the disc in the CD player and joined Hermione on the sofa, where they resumed their prior activity.
She eventually asked, 'What are we listening to?'
'It's the latest album by XTC.'
'How appropriate,' she replied, and they both smiled.
They remained clothed, but it required considerable willpower from Hermione—and from Ryan as well, she suspected. She had an idea that she shouldn't rush too quickly into a physical relationship, but it was hard to see the logic just then.
'I should probably go,' she said, sitting up.
'All right, if you must,' he replied. 'When can I see you again?'
'I'm busy tomorrow and Thursday nights, so it would have to be Wednesday or Friday.'
'Wednesday,' he said decisively. 'It has the twin advantages of being sooner and not being the night before a match.'
'Perfect.' She rose from the sofa and walked towards the fireplace. He moved to kiss her one last time but she pulled away. 'I won't leave if you do that,' she said.
He smiled and backed away. 'Then go, before I lose my mind.'
She threw in a pinch of Floo powder, spoke her destination, and quickly stepped through the green flames.
-––—––-
Emily was having trouble falling asleep for no apparent reason, and so she went to the kitchen to make some herbal tea. She'd been at the table several minutes when she heard the familiar whoosh of flames from the fireplace.
Hermione peered into the kitchen. 'Why are you still up? Is everything all right?'
'I'm fine—I just couldn't sleep and thought a tisane might relax me. There's more water in the kettle if you want something.'
'Yes, actually,' said Hermione as she walked to the counter and restarted the kettle.
'Did you have a nice time with Ryan?'
'Oh, Mum, I had a wonderful time,' she said, her eyes glowing.
'I can see that,' replied Emily, not mentioning that her daughter's ringlets appeared disheveled. 'Did you go to dinner?'
'Yes, at an Italian restaurant near his flat. It turns out Ryan lives in Cambridge, if you can believe it.'
'Did you get to walk around? I'm sorry your father and I never brought you there.'
'Yes, he showed me some of the colleges. It was lovely.'
Emily sipped her tea and observed Hermione, who was pouring the hot water into a mug over a sachet. 'Is he from Cambridge originally? I don't imagine he moved there for university.'
'No, he grew up there. He didn't attend uni, but he's hoping to resume his studies after he retires from the Cannons.'
Good lord, he's an intellectual trapped in the body of a Greek god. No wonder Hermione is smitten, thought Emily indulgently. 'That's good. It would be a shame to peak in one's twenties.'
'I'm sure he'd agree—he's actually quite ambitious. He's currently saving money to support his future career as a mad scientist.'
'I can't imagine any professional footballers having the same goal, but perhaps they have hidden depths.'
'Mum, listen to yourself! Just last week you were chiding me for being prejudiced against athletes, and now you're doing the same thing.'
'I suppose I am. I have to admit, I like that he has a non-magical parent.'
'I do too,' said Hermione. 'I hadn't realised how much I missed that side of things.'
Emily felt a mixture of emotions, including a bit of hurt that she and Daniel weren't enough to keep Hermione connected to her Muggle origins. 'Do you expect to meet his parents anytime soon?'
'Yes, I'll meet them on Saturday, at the Cannons match. And I might see them again on Sunday, because Ryan wants to borrow their car to bring his stereo to Harry's party.'
'Harry is throwing a party?'
'Yes, an enormous one on his birthday, the weekend after next.'
'That doesn't sound like him, but I'm glad to hear it. I sometimes worry you and your friends don't act enough like teenagers.'
'That's not true for Harry any longer. Now that he's joined the team, he seems to be having some of the fun he missed growing up.'
'I suspect it's important developmentally,' observed Emily. 'I know I grew up quite a lot at university, and I get the impression your father did as well.'
'Perhaps you're right,' said Hermione absently, sipping her tea. She looked at her mother and said, 'May I ask you something?'
'Of course.'
'How long am I supposed to wait before ... becoming intimate with a partner?'
'Is Ryan pressuring you?'
'No, not at all. I'm just finding it harder to wait than I'd expected.'
'Was it different with Ron then?'
Hermione nodded. 'It was completely different, for about a thousand reasons. Remember we got together less than an hour before Fred died, among others.'
And Ron wasn't an intellectual trapped in the body of a Greek god, thought Emily. 'Yes, I can see how that might put a damper on things,' she said. 'As for Ryan ... I guess you need to trust your intuition, and whether you feel really comfortable around him.'
'I do already. More than I would have thought possible.'
'And how much do you know about him from other sources?'
'That's a good question. Not much, I suppose, other than that he's the Cannons' star Chaser.'
Of course he is. 'Then maybe it's worth asking around. If he's famous, he's bound to have a reputation.'
Hermione nodded. 'It feels a little underhanded, but if he's who I think he is I know he wouldn't mind.'
'Do you know anything about his prior relationships?'
'Only that he's mostly dated half-bloods who weren't familiar with Muggle culture. And that he wouldn't feel comfortable dating a Muggle because he'd have to lie to her.'
I'm glad he has compunction about lying, came a harsh voice in Emily's mind. 'That speaks well of him, certainly.'
'It does,' said Hermione. 'I'd love for you to get to know him better. Sometime soon, I hope.'
'I'd like that. I must say, he's made a good impression so far. And not just because he knows how to use a telephone.'
Hermione smiled. 'He's made a good impression on me too.'
Don't say it, thought Emily with an inward smirk. 'I'm glad—you deserve to be happy. And I admit I'm enjoying seeing you a bit lovesick. We missed that phase with Ron.'
'I'm not sure I ever had it with Ron. Our relationship was so different. And the war, of course.'
The bloody war. 'Yes, of course.'
Hermione rose. 'I should go to bed. And you should too—I hope you're able to fall asleep.'
'I believe I will.' Emily stood from the table and gave her daughter a hug. 'I'm glad you had a nice time, and thanks for confiding in me. I love you, sweetie.'
'I love you too, Mum,' she said before walking upstairs to her bedroom.
Emily cleared the two mugs from the table and placed them in the dishwasher. She felt grateful her daughter had trusted her enough to ask about sex, after their long history of distrust. And she was glad to witness this stage of Hermione's life, which she had feared she'd missed. I should send Ron a thank-you card for breaking up with her.
She turned out the light and returned to her bedroom. Snuggling up to Daniel, she was grateful for the extraordinary child they had created. Hermione had broken their hearts, but apparently even a Muggle like herself was capable of extraordinary feats of healing.