A fan that isn't working. A palish yellow ceiling. What were they thinking when they painted this?
[I opened my eyes, a sight unfamiliar. Something is wrong, where am I?]
A soothing song was playing from beside the bed. I am on the bed... on a bed and someone was beside me, with their hair draping over half my body. I can't see anything though. All I see is the darkness of their hair. Long unkempt hair. Might be a male as well?
[Who am I?]
I turn to look at other things. From what my measly observations has gotten me, I am in the body of a child. On the Bed. That was on the bed. I am not a child. Not the one I was in. I can't remember who I was though. No matter how much I tried. I just know things but I can't remember why or how I know this or that. I don't know much at that.
I am an adult. A grown man. An old man. Am I a man? Was I? I can't remember. But I know that I am not a child. Something in me says so. Disagrees so.
There are no memories. Neither mine or the one whose body I am in.
I blankly gazed at my hands. My hands are tiny. As I am. I might be malnourished a bit.
How do I look though?
And where am I? A hospital. I am calm. Unnecessarily so.
Think and thought, look and sought, I and you. My vocabulary is missing. I can't remember. Second by second, breath by breath, I am losing my calm now.
Why can't I remember? I am supposed to be someone special. I just can't remember.
"Oh! You are fine!"
"Shut up." [Me]
A voice came and I unconsciously answered.
"Wait, what?" [Me]
I clamoured, my voice my sweet. Putting that aside, what was with this rude way of talking to someone who is speaking politely? And why am I not feeling that this is wrong? Do I talk like this? Did I talk like this?
Also why was she surprised that I am fine? Not hoping I would be awake? Do I have some enmity with the Nurse/Doctor? Why do I know that she is a Nurse/Doctor?
Is it the clothes that gave it away? But I don't remember anything like her dress. But I know.
I can't think straight. Am I mad?
[I wonder]
The Nurse/Doctor seem to stop in her tracks, dead silent or probably at a loss of words, I should apologise, but something else seem to have awakened on the other side of my sight...
The luscious hair flock rose up to reveal a 13, 15, 16 year old girl with blackness under her eyes and tiredness to her visage. She looked closer to dead than I could be.
My mirth and humour seem to dissipate at the sight of her eyes though.
I saw in her ...so much of agony and pain, clearing away at the sight of my face. Delight seem to feel her mind, fading away the despair in her heart. It hurts me when I look at her, as if my heart bursts with unwrenching cuts. What have I done to her? What has she been through.
Why do I feel this remorse?
"Huh!"
A moment of blankness unsued her as she absentmindedly looked at me as if I was an illusion. Tears began to flow down her eyes.
"You ARE AWAKE!!!!"
She lunged at me with speed that I couldn't perceive, hugging me with such strength that I was in pain. Definate physical pain. She seems to have no idea though, as she continued to sob while thanking someone.
Maybe the god or maybe the devil, her parents or the government, I don't know. I was just lost.
And here I was, in her embrace and with all the pain and anguish that she had in her. With tears in her eyes and blankness in mine, I blacked out. My tiny self can't comprehend all this for now.
[I need time.]
Time to accept what's thrown at me.
....
I woke up. The yellow palish ceiling greeted me with its not working fan.
It wasn't a dream.
I raised myself and looked around. There was no one except me.
My sudden blackout must have definitely caused some repercussions. I hope the fees aren't too much. I think weirdly.
This hospital room is really bland.
I turn to look behind me and the sight answered me as to why the fan was not working.
Behind me was the window. A big window. And behind the window was snow. Snow with buildings and a mountain and I can even see some vehicles pass by in the distance.
It was snowing here!
Ah–
What is this?
As I felt the unboud happiness at the sight of snow(I don't know why), I felt a surge of pain in my heart, coming from my body. Physical body.
I checked it and there's a problem.
My heart is weak. Not just the heart, but the entire chest is weak. Weak as in if others heart is a cardboard then mine is the low quality tissue paper. Quite easy to rip and tear.
Conclusion - This body can't handle stress or excitement. Basically anything too much and the paper will tear. So would my heart tissues. I have keep my emotions in check.
I calmed down, putting my excitement at the snow at rest. The pain in my heart began to reside as well. It will take some time to completely end though.
This is a new type of ailment. I am pretty sure I haven't encountered something like this. And I am sure of it even when I don't remember anything.
On that note, what was I? How did I do this? Whatever it was. I just squinted my eyes a bit and I know what is going on with me? A miracle? Some power? Scam? Am I lying to myself?
Or is it something else? Let's do this on someone else and that should clarify whether I am wrong or not.
Coming back to the topic though, I at least have the reason for why I blacked out.
Too much emotions that I felt from her.
As I recalled that moment, I realised that I had somehow felt her emotions and that's not normal as well.
What am I?
No, the question should be who was I, as a child that she knows and as Myself that I once was.
For all I know now, the child that presided in this body is dead. Poor child.
From the condition of the heart and its surroundings, it had suffered two failures already and one of them must have taken the kid out. Adding to the fact that this answers as to how I was awakened yesterday.
Yes, yesterday. I have been unconscious for the past 9 hours since I blacked out. Something I found in my 'squinting'. Magical, ain't it?
So to summarise from my second findings, the chain of events happened like this.
The Owner of the body has an ailment that causes the tissues in the heart and its surroundings to be extremely weak. Yesterday, or the previous day, that said Owner had encountered something that caused severe emotional distress and the heart ruptured.
Then he was taken to the hospital where the doctors 'healed' it back to normal somehow and it wasn't the normal surgery or operation but some form of healing that I don't know.
There's no stitches, no cuts. The body hasn't been opened yet.
I should stay on the topic. The doctors healed the heart to what it was and things should have gone fine since there was nothing else wrong but around 4 hours later, the second heart rupture occurred, this time, far more severe than before and then there were traces of a second heal but the records ceased after that.
I know nothing of what had happened during that time.
An hour later after the 'cease', I awakened, met the Nurse or Doctor.
She was surprised that I was fine... and then I met that child and blacked out due to the sudden influx of her emotion that I felt but my body couldn't take, hence shutting me off before it becomes worse.
The child died somewhere in the hour that I have no knowledge off and from the reaction of the nurse and my sudden awakening, I think I know exactly when and why was she surprised.
The gate opened and the dark flock of hair could be seen.
I looked at her. I don't know where I am. I don't know who I am either. I am currently in a body of someone who is dead. Someone that should be dead.
This person has someone who is happy that he is alive.
What should I say to her? She is bound to know someday. What do I do now? There should be something that I know. I don't remember. Can't remember.
What should I do?