One's Comfort Game

'BZZZ' a sound echoes in my head. Slowly regaining consciousness I groan.

"Ugh, my head hurts" I whimpered. With an unknown setting panic setting in. Where could I be? How did I get here? 

Stumbling, I force myself up, looking around I find myself in a high-rise building, in my father's office. Red and grey smoke consuming the sky outside the window, polluting all oxygen causing the surrounding plants to whither.

Squinting into the distance I notice cars scattered across all roads and foot paths. Carnage had engulfed the city, the city I once called home. Scanning the surrounding, but no one in sight. Had there been an emergency evacuation? I prayed for everyone's safety. Just an hour ago I was getting for summer trip with my friends, collectively we had all agreed to meet at the train station at noon. In a daze I looked around for my phone. 

"There must've been an announcement on the news, I need to look for my phone!" I muttered stumbling around all the fallen furniture. "Ah ha, found it!" Quickly powering on the phone I browsed all major news sites. "Come on, come on", panic had started building up in me as the signal started crashing. "Fuck, why now of all times!" Grabbing the phone I rushed out side. "I need to go somewhere with signal."

Exiting the apartment my eyes were met with bodies scattered across the floor. Blood stained floors, blood splattered everywhere. I clenched my stomach as the rancid smell hit me, the smell of decomposing bodies. "Wahhh ahh" I sobbed, fear taking over me.

Growing up I had never been comfortable around the sight of blood, despite being a surgeons daughter. The sight of blood made me feel violently ill. My knees giving in allowing me to make contact with the concrete, scraping at impact with contact. "Huuuhhh" I gasped, crawling away from the blood.

I'm never the one to over come their fears but one who would give in to the darkness. Hurt by the idea my traumas will never truly go away, despite taking the time to over come them. Yet again, I'm a victim of the darkness of fear. A door mat, a pushover, a reject. In my father's eyes, a waste of space. To other's I have the perfect life, a happy family and never ending opportunities. But that's what they see on screen. Behind the doors it's a life filled with neglect and abuse.

My fear of blood first came from my trauma given to me by my father. If he hadn't had a mistress, my mother… She would still be here and yet she died a painful death. If I had been with her, my father and his mistress wouldn't have been able to scheme. That bastard of a man I once called father divided, someone who broke my family apart. In his eyes we were all merely pawns in his game of chess. I was always one step behind, his mental fucked up games can all go to hell. There's no saving a narcissist, they don't want to be helped, no they can't be helped!

Those who give more than they receive will never get anywhere if life, my dying mother had wasted her last breath worrying about that damned man. He clearly didn't give two shits about his family, the family so carelessly broke, so why was she worrying in her final moment? She was too naïve, too innocent and loving. That's why good people will always come last. 

"Help!" a voiced cried snapping into reality. A female voiced echoed through the corridor pleading for help. Terrified I started crawling for an exit to the stairs, undetermined to help in fear of being caught in the cross fire of what was happening to that poor woman. "Ahhgh" she screamed in pain. "Please help me.." the voice pleaded. 

The closer I got to the stairs the louder the cries became. The cries were taunting me, testing me my patience. Guilt started building inside me, what if that was someone I knew that needed help? Me leaving them there was like handing a lamb to a wolf. My conscience would never let me live with the guilt. Especially if I capable of helping another one out. That's what my mother would have wanted, the pure hearted person she was.

Determined, I took a deep breath mentally preparing for what was about to come. Mid thought, there was another scream, only this time it was a child. Leaping into action I ran into the direction of the screams, where stood an unidentified figure. Petrified I froze in fear. "Watch out miss!" a voiced cried out in fear.