The poor sunlight intruded through the slats of the blind and villainously painted shadows on the walls. Alexis opened her eyes dreading the sound of a piercing headache always followed by the sight of Derek lying naked beside her. The argument they had last night was circling in her mind like a record that skip and his defensiveness, the half-truths he gave as the reason for his behavior and the paranoid feeling that there was more he was not telling.
"You always stay at work till late," she said to him.
"You're always disappearing! I'm not stupid, Derek. Are you cheating on me?" Alexis asked.
Derek got up, with disapproval in his eyes.
His denial had been fast and laced with what she could only term as desperation she had never seen in him. "You don't trust me anymore? I just feel so annoyed….. I mean what the f**k do I have to do to prove it to you ?
Alexis felt guilty for asking such a question. Derek went back to bed.
However, he spoke and his words were mechanical; Alexis could not tell whether she still believed him or not.
It was softly as if she could not raise her voice above a whisper and she was sitting up on the bed. "One last try… One last try."
The piercing pain in her head told her that she could not afford to be late for work anymore. Slowly and painfully she got out of bed, hobbled into the shower, to have her thoughts melted away with the steam and the heat.
By the time she came back, Derek was still sleeping, his face buried inside the pillows on the bed. At one point she found herself on the verge of shaking him and telling him to put his clothes on, but she didn't.
Alexis mumbles softly to herself "I can't live like this anymore."
Alexis got dressed and she took her bag, Alexis went for the door then closed it, not with a bang, but more of a click. Out in the coolness of the morning, a voice in the back of her mind was saying "It's time now to go and never come back"
When at work, Alexis could not concentrate. Her boss passed her a pile of reports to fill in but instead, she sat there, daydreaming, her fingers tapping on her phone. She ended up on some real estate website, her gaze wandering across the posted listings not seeing them.
Most of them were dirty, cheap looking, and bare of furniture but she was able to find a good one for herself: "Two-bedroom apartment with city view," she said to herself. "Close to downtown, exposure to natural light…"
There was one listing that turned her eyes: This was the name on the poster: Thorne. It was brief, very brief, it gave only the bare bones but it did say something about privacy and the ability to arrange your schedule as she needed. Without hesitation, Alexis went to the woman's profile and clicked on the "Contact" button and filled out an inquiry.
She had her finger on the Send button. "Am I making a mistake?" she eventually asked in a very low tone that her work colleague didn't hear her at first.
But the doubts were fleeting. She hit on the Send button and the message that her email had been sent flashed across the screen.
A few minutes later, there was a message on her phone. It was a reply from Thorne:
"The room is available. Move-in anytime. Privacy is the most important thing as far as I am concerned. If interested I can send the address."
It felt sterile really; non-sensitive and just clinical. But it was a certainty which Alexis required and so the idea was born.
By mid afternoon, Alexis wanted her glasses but to her surprise she had left them at home. And she couldn't work without them. Swearing to herself aloud, she was indecisive. She had no wish to return, to be in the vicinity of Derek after last night… I think it is merely simple to call it tension. But she had no choice.
"Fine." She accepted her fate. "In and out" she added. She grabbed her keys, took permission from her boss, and left.
She got home and there was such stillness that always gave her chills in the pit of her stomach. She opened the door slowly to step into the room.
A muted noise came from the bedroom once more. A giggle.
Alexis froze. She waited impatiently, to listen again, her own heartbeat echoes in her ears as she tried to catch the sound.
"Take it slow!" A woman's voice.
A lady was moaning from the other room.
Around the chest Alexis clutched, tension quickly climbed; the breath between her teeth froze. "No. It can't be."
Her heart was racing.
She had some kind of cramps; her legs starts to walk on their own, leading her to the bedroom. The door was ajar and opened a crack so that she could occasionally make out the figures shifting in the room.
Another giggle. A low moan.
"Oh... my gosh babe,,, ohh take it slow," the lady screams once more until she reaches orgasms.
Alexis' hand shook as inserted the key into the lock and opened the door.
There he was, Derek. Nude, on the bed, entwined with a woman.
Alexis's world swam before her eyes, she felt betrayed. This caused her to exhale and Derek took it as an opportunity to look at her.
"Derek!" she thundered.
Derek quickly turned.
"Alexis!" he spluttered, blanching and fumbling to grab the sheet over himself. "Oh please!"
She spoke horribly, her voice hostile, and her fists tightened.
"It is not what it looks like," Derek said, defending his actions.
"It's exactly what it looks like," she told the last man who dared to pass judgment on her body, Derek.
The woman in the bed gave a shaky laugh, tucking the sheet up to her neck.
"Derek? Who is she?" the lady asked.
"Just shut up okay?" Derek rebuked her.
Derek stared wild-eyed between them. He just looked at Alexis who was fuming mad.
"Alexis, please. Let me explain….."
She interrupted him sharply noting her voice was a little louder. "Explain?! Explain what? huh? Derek? How did you lie to me? That's how, babe, when you were fucking someone else, you promised me that you'd change? While doing it in the bed we used to share?
"Please...," Derek begged.
Entering the room, Derek attempted to speak to her but she backed away severing his connection and shaking her head.
"Don't touch me!" Alexis rebuked.
Anway, she said "I am done." She said it through quivering lips, as though she was about to cry.
She continued, "This is the last time you humiliate me."
"Wait…." Derek began, but Alexis interrupted him. She proceeded to her luggage and packed some of her cloths though leaving some of them behind, Derek on his knees pleaded but she never listened to him. She got up angrily and left the apartment with a lot of force when closing the door.
At the bus stop, Alexis sat with her bag in her chest, she was crying. She was not concerned with people giving her the pitiful stare.
Her phone buzzed again. It was another message from Thorne.
"Here's the address." The message started, "Come in whenever you want to and move in whenever you are ready."
She rubbed her eyes as the message was a positive one.
Alexis looked at the message, "This is it," she told herself
"A new beginning." She added.
Alexis needs a place to stay for now.
As predicted, the bus came, and with a sound like a debate's gavel the doors were pulled open.
Alexis entered the bus, she breathed deeply, looked at the address one last time, then breathed deeply. She wants a new start; she doesn't know Derek is watching her.
"You are mine, Alexis, you are mine… . no matter where you are going I will search for you!" Derek said within himself.