I got to Professor's seat, kept the assignments on the table and went without stopping until I reached home. I went straight to my room, locked myself up. The tears started to flow from my eyes.
"ha...ah...." my crying sound echo my room. I tried so hard to move on from my past, when I finally moved on, again my past came back to me. Now how am I going to make myself forget about it.
The tears started to flow even more. Thinking about that shitty time. It was playing on my mind like again and again not stopping. My mind was clouded with thoughts. I was overwhelmed by my shitty memories.
"Ah....ha.....ah...mmh..." my crying didn't stop but became more louder and intense. The pain I was feeling I couldn't express in words so, I was expressing it in tears, in my cries. The time went by and I didn't know when I fall asleep. I just remember me lying on my bed with blanket and crying. I didn't quite sleep well. Last night I was crying and suddenly felt dizzy and pass out because of that pain brought in me by that Dog- satine.
I woke up because of nightmare about all the...people turning towards me and saying I'm dirty.
As soon I woke up from a nightmare, the tears started to fall out with feeling of fright.
"No!No!No....!!" I kept on emphasizing on no word and I kept on convincing myself that it's not true. "I am not dirty!" I shouted to tell it's not true. It took couple of hours to calm myself down from my panic episode. I had to calm myself down because my mom was calling me. And I can't let her slightest bit knowledge about this things so, I wipe my tears, calm down and pick up the phone and tried to talk normally. Not let her notice and thankfully she didn't notice it.