One autumn, I went to stay for the hunting season with some friends in a chateau in Picardy
My friends were fond of practical joking, as all my friends are. I do not care to know any other sort of people.
When I arrived, they gave me a princely reception, which at once aroused distrust in my breast. They embraced me, they cajoled me, as if they expected to have great fun at my expense.
I said to myself:
'Look out, old ferret! They have something in preparation for you."
During the dinner, the mirth was excessive, far too great, in fact. I thought: 'Here are people who take double share of amusement, and apparently without reason. They must De looking out in their own minds for some good bit of fun. Assuredly, I am to me the victim of the joke. Attention!"
During the entire evening, everyone laughed n an exaggerated fashion. I smelt a ractical joke in the air, as a dog smells ame. But what was it? I was watchful,resthom. I did not let a word ut a meaning на ден прегули an object of onepucun, and I even booked dotrustfully at the othe The hour rong for going to best, and the whole homme in escort room. Why? They said to moc Genl nigla Lentered the apartmen
remained standing, without merving a single step, tolding the was I heard laughter and whispering in the currufor Without the wingin I cast a glance around the walle, the furniture, the miling, the hanging notlung stosperous. I heard people moving about outside my door Iliad wery looking through the keyhole
An uden came into my ned candle may suddenly and leave me un dur
Then I went acriss to the mantelpiece and lighted all the wax candles that were on After that. I cast another glahor around me without discovering anything I advanced with w steps, carefully examining the apartment. Nothing I inspect overy article, one after the othe Still nothing. I went over to the window. The shutters, large wooden shutters, were open I shut them with great care, and then drew the curtaina, enormous velvet curtains, and placed a chair in
front of them, so as to have nothing to fear from outside.
Then I cautiously sat down. The armchair was solid, I did not dare to get into the bed. However, the night was advancing, and I ended by coming to the conclusion that I was foolish. If they were spying on me, as I supposed, they must, while waiting for the success of the joke they had been preparing for me, have been laughing enormously at my terror. So, I made up my mind to go to bed. But the bed was particularly suspicious looking. I pulled at the curtains. They seemed to be secure. All the same, there was danger. I was going perhaps to receive a cold shower-bath from overhead, or perhaps. moment I stretched myself out, to find myself sinking under the floor with my mattress I searched in my memory for all the practical jokes of which I ever had experience. And I did not want to be caught. No! certainly not! certainly not! Then I suddenly thought of a precaution which I consider one of extreme efficacy: I caught hold of the side of the mattress gingerly, and very slowly drew it toward me. It came away, followed by the sheet and the rest of the bedclothes. I dragged all these objects into the very middle of room, facing the entrance door. I made my bed over again as best I could at some distance Blled with such anxiety. Then, Textinguished all the candles, and, groping my way, I slipped under the bedclothes.
For at least another hour. I remained awake. starting at the slightest sound. Everything soumed quiet in the chateau, I fell asleep.
I must have been in a deep sleep for a long time, but all of a sudden. I was awakened with a start by the fall of a heavy body tumbling right on top of my own body, and, at the same time, I received on my face, on my neck, and on my chest a burning liquid which made me utter a howl of pain. And a dreadful noise, as if a sideboard laden with plates and dishes had fallen down, penetrated my ears:
I felt myself suffocating under the weight that was crushing me and preventing me from moving. I stretched out my hand to find out what was the nature of this object. I felt a face, a nose, and whiskers! Then with all my strength. I launched out a blow over this face. But Limmediately received a hail of euffings which made me jump straight out of the soaked sheets, and rush in my nightshirt into the corridor, the door of which I found open
O stupor! It was broad daylight. The noise brought my friends hurrying into the apartment, and we found, sprawling over my improvised bed, the dismayed valet, who, while bringing me my morning cup of tea, had tripped over this obstacle in the middle of the floor, and fallen on his stomach, spilling, in spite of himself, my breakfast over my face.
The precautions I had taken in closing the shutters and going to sleep in the middle of the room had only brought about the interlude I had been trying to avoid.
Ah! how they all laughed that day!