Standing before me was a girl with a short ponytail, her face full of confidence and mischief. The most distinctive thing about her wasn't her hairstyle or anything like that, but her height—she looked like she could still be in elementary school. I couldn't help but wonder if she had gotten lost somehow.
But judging by her demeanor and the situation at hand, she was probably a senior—definitely a high school senior if this were an anime.
"Well, well, look who's here... The famous doll from Room 3 herself. Welcome to the Current Affairs Club. So, did you come here for some juicy news, or are you thinking of joining us?"
The senior with the ponytail spoke with a sly grin, as if she was about to have some fun. If you looked closely, you'd see that the room was practically empty, with just one big table and five chairs.
It seemed that when I ran in here, I must have locked the door behind me. It was pure luck, giving me a chance to catch my breath after running away.
"Fah, come on out, please."
"Fah, sorry if we scared you. Please come out."
The two of them knocked on the door, their voices full of concern, which felt odd. But for someone who had just been caught in the middle of their tug-of-war, it felt like a scene from a horror movie—complete with two killers.
"That voice... It's the prince and princess, isn't it? Ah, so the rumors are true," the senior at the head of the table muttered to herself for a moment, as if coming to some conclusion. Then she stood up and walked over to me.
"So, doll from Room 5-3, what brings the school's most famous student to my little club?"
"Club?"
If I remembered correctly, the senior had introduced herself using a rather strange club name...
"The Current Affairs Club."
She repeated it as she slowly walked toward me, the knocking on the door continuing in the background.
"So, let me ask you again. Did you come here because you want to join us, or are you just looking for some interesting news?"
"Uh..."
I froze, feeling like I was suddenly in the middle of some anime scene. And the senior seemed quite proud of that fact.
"What kind of club is this?"
"What? You came here without knowing?"
"Well, there was a bit of an incident, so I just ran in here. Sorry for the trouble."
I raised my hands in a gesture of apology, but the senior waved it off casually.
"Well, since you're here, let me give you the pitch for our club."
Then the senior climbed up onto the table, trying to make herself look taller than me. I guess it was all to boost her presence; otherwise, she'd look like an elementary kid talking to a high schooler, and that wouldn't be cool for her anime-style introduction.
"We, the Current Affairs Club, offer premium service to satisfy everyone's curiosity! If you want to know someone's secrets, just ask, because every secret is meant to be revealed and gossiped about!"
She proclaimed with pride, crossing her arms and lifting her head as if this was her long-awaited grand entrance.
Wait a second... Isn't this just a club for snooping into people's business? How is a club like this even allowed to exist?!
No, seriously, what she said about offering premium service and revealing secrets—it sounds like they're selling people's personal information. And gossiping? They're not even trying to hide their real intentions! What kind of club did I stumble into?
"Alright, newbie. You know, human nature is full of curiosity—especially about other people's business. That's the purpose of our club."
"What kind of principle is that?"
"Even if it sounds philosophical, it doesn't make it any better, senior!"
The senior with the ponytail chuckled, her smile cunning, as she stepped down from the table and walked closer to me. She stopped right in front of me, tapping her chin lightly with her finger.
"You can say what you want, but you have to admit—we're the best source of information in this school. Whether it's rumors, facts, or things you never knew before... Who's secretly dating who, or what your classmates are saying about you—we can find it all."
Acting like detectives, but really just a gossip group... Who allowed this kind of club to be formed?! This is no good—the longer I stay here, the more I feel like I'm talking to the devil. Did I just escape from the frying pan into the fire?
I glanced back at the door, still hearing the constant knocking—it was getting louder and more frequent, like the climax of a horror movie.
"Uh... No, thank you! I'm not interested in anyone's secrets or anything like that!"
If I kept talking any longer, those two were definitely going to get in here. It seemed impossible, but knowing them, I believed it could happen.
"Really? Well, what if I told you I have some juicy secrets about the prince and princess? Or maybe you'd like to hear what people are saying about you... Interested?"
Secrets about Aqua and Beam? That does sound... No, no, no!
What am I thinking?! I could feel my face heat up at the thought, which didn't escape the keen eyes of the senior—like a nosy neighbor.
"Oh my, you look so innocent, but you're thinking naughty thoughts, aren't you?"
"N-No, that's not it!"
"Don't be embarrassed. Whether it's measurements, family stories, or anything else you want to know, I can find it—if you've got the right information to trade."
Wow, this information queen is scary.
"So, are you interested in joining our club? We've got freedom like no other club, snacks, and plenty of free time. All you have to do is sign right here."
"Fah's been quiet for a while... Wait, don't tell me!"
"Fah, if that person says anything, don't believe it, okay?"
Huh?
I turned towards the sound of Beam's panicked shout. Was this person really that dangerous? But before I could think further, the short senior moved to block my view of the door, lifting her hand to lift my chin.
"Hey... Don't you have anything you're curious about? Secrets or juicy gossip about this school?"
"Well..."
At that moment, I suddenly remembered Dr. Frey and the formula that went missing here at the school—right as the senior spoke again.
"No need to say it. I can see it in your eyes—you're looking for something."
"...!!!"
It felt like she had read my mind. I flinched, but the sly, playful smile on her face didn't fade.
"You know, our club offers some nice perks—free snacks, lots of free time, and exclusive news from this cute senior. Are you really going to pass that up?"
"Well..."
In my mind, a scale appeared. On one side was an angel version of myself, and on the other, a devil version.
"Fah, no! Aqua and Beam already said not to trust her!"
"Hehe, but this is the perfect chance to get info on how to change back."
Angel Fah and Devil Fah started arguing, making me even more confused.
"Well, that's true... but this club is dangerous and meddles in people's business. People will look down on you, Fah."
"It's just a little meddling—nothing serious. Aqua and Beam will take care of everything. Who would dare mess with you?"
"Don't take advantage of others' kindness, Fah."
The little angel kept trying to convince me, but Devil Fah just grinned and whispered softly.
"Or are you going to pass up the chance to be a guy again?"
"B-But being a girl isn't so bad either!!!"
No!!! That's dangerous. How did that thought even come up?!
I quickly shook my head, trying to clear my mind, before kicking out the angel and embracing the devil. Slowly, I reached out for the pen that the senior was holding, my heart still hesitating. Meanwhile, the voices from outside grew louder.
"Fah's been too quiet—she's definitely getting tricked by that senior! What do we do, Aqua? Should we break the door down?"
"No, if we do, Ms. Apichanat will drag us straight to the principal's office..."
"Then what do we do? Our Fah is being tempted by a demon!"
"We have no choice. I'll use the skeleton key I had specially made."
"How do you even have that? Never mind, let's just use it."
Their conversation sounded more and more like a crime in progress—especially Aqua, who had some pretty weird equipment. Meanwhile, the senior squinted her eyes at me.
"There's no time left."
"Alright, whatever happens, happens!"
For the chance to return to being a guy, I'd make a deal with the devil. Without hesitation, I took the pen and signed the contract, ignoring the little angel who was still pleading with me.
*Bang*
The door burst open, and the two of them rushed into the room. The club senior turned to face them, smiling like she had already won.
"Sorry, princess and prince. This little doll is now officially a member of the Current Affairs Club. Hahaha!"
"Are we too late?"
"Oh, Fah... why?"
Whoa, whoa, why are they being so dramatic? It's just joining a club, not signing up for a black company. And senior, why are you posing like this is some grand victory?!
"Alright, Fah, let me officially introduce myself. I'm Tiph, senior of Class 12-2 and president of the Current Affairs Club. Welcome, new member!"
The senior beamed with joy while Beam and Aqua clenched their fists in despair, as if I had just been sold to some evil master... Uh, but seriously,
If it's that bad, can't I just sign up for another club later?
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