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Chapter 5 - 5. Gate Keeper

First person perspective:

As soon as the potion touched my lips, the taste of strawberry milkshake flooded my mouth. I almost cried, I could kiss whoever settled on that flavouring. That was before I realised, it was probably designed as one's last meal.

I downed it in one, and waited.

My stomach tingled, a slight pressure raised up through my throat, and then burp. Well that was anti-climatic. Nothing else happened for a while.

Wait a moment, what if this was all someone pulling my leg? I mean come on, how ridiculous was all this? A cult group called the illuminati ran by shadowy figures who employed nuns to be their dealers? A organisation called H.V.N but not to be mistaken by the well known afterlife destination heaven, and , the cherry on the top, I had killed the messiah and somehow brought on the apocalypse?

This was sounding like a poorly planned novel by an amateur writer with a little too much time on their hands.

Suddenly the world around me began to twist and blur. The sterile white room quickly melted into a vortex of colour, and I felt my body lurch forward, as if being pulled into an invisible tide. My senses swirled, reality distorted—like I was being pulled in two opposing directions, floating between two worlds, neither here nor there.

So maybe this was real after all.

Then, it all stopped.

I was kneeling on an endless plain, a sky so vast and empty it seemed to stretch forever, the air thick with an unnatural stillness. The ground beneath me was smooth, but shifting, as if it was made of liquid glass. My body felt different—lighter, more ethereal—like my very soul had been peeled free from its human vessel, and I was now something more... or perhaps less. The sense of power was overwhelming, like I could feel the pulse of the universe beneath my feet. It was intoxicating, terrifying. Now this is what I was expecting when I woke up in the first place! Much more like the classic description of heaven.

I took an uneasy step forward, testing the stability of the invisible surface beneath me and immediately I was pulled forward like on a speeding treadmill until I was deposited before giant gilded gates heavily flourished by pearls and vining flowers in colours I had never seen before.

Woah.

"You took the leap then, mortal" a throaty grumble sounded. Jumping, I ripped my eyes from the grandeur that had captivated my attention and to my right, where a looming cloaked figure stood. Their face was entirely masked in shadow, their limbs hidden behind a tattered robe but I could feel their hot gaze upon me. " The gods have been watching and waiting for your arrival. I'm sure many will be pleased by your decision." they continued.

Despite their unnerving presence, creepy voice and even weirder choice of clothes, the stranger seemed friendly enough. I knew from personal experiance first impressions meant little, I mean, most people believe all I am is an annoying, selfish and cowardly individual, but I'm an onion too with just as many complex layers as the next person. Look, what I'm getting at, I suppose is that I'm just like Shrek, but a lot more dashing.

"Well that's a relief. I'm assuming that means I won't get pulverised on sight then?" I answere brightly. The figure remained silent. Silence stretched between us.

"Are you a deity too?" I asked.

The reply came instantly: "No, I am the Cailleach, gate keeper to the realm of Gods"

More silence.

"It seems weird to refer to someone by their title. I guess that makes me, Era, forced participant." I introduced. Hook, line... silence. Sinker.

I sighed, it seemed any attempt at building rapport was obviously not appreciated. I was getting scared now, humour was an old coping mechanism ( I don't know if you could tell ) but it seems in this realm I wasn't particularly funny.

"I am Beira"

That shocked me. So I wasn't funny, but maybe this was still working?

"Well it's a pleasure to meet you Beira, how may I enter?"

Beira extended her hand, palm outstretched, as if waiting for something. I had nothing to offer. For as long as the "channeler" women had spoken, she deemed it fit to miss out the part where I needed to bring a form of payment with me! Maybe she just wanted a high-five? Even I knew that was wishful thinking.

"You have a very beautiful name" I offered, it was the truth but alas a desperate attempt. It didn't work. Something to offer? This felt like some sort of test. Maybe it didn't have to be physical. Something I could offer as value. Maybe a secret? Who didn't love a bit of gossip?, I imagine being the gatekeeper to the realm of gods was a pretty lonely job, maybe she'd appreciate some entertainment.

"I killed Vicar Peter by accident. I was aiming for Mother Superior, Sister Maria" I admitted. Her hand clenched and then fell back to her side. Phew, I let out a sigh, feeling lighter now I had confessed. It worked. She walked over to the gates, pressed her hands on them and began to push. With a squeal and groan, they slowly began to open. It must be strenuous work though, especially for a women only half a feet taller then me. Without thought, I leapt to her aid. I mean, the gods were probably waiting, and it was best not to let them brew in their emotions for too long- for my sake of course.

Together we shoved them open, until they were fully ajar. Admittedly, I did hardly any of the work. If only Beira could come with me, I thought, I think her presence would make me feel at ease, besides I had plenty of secrets to offer her yet.

"I should go in" I mumbled, my emotions starting to boil at the thought of walking to my demise. It was starting to settle in now, the weight of what lay ahead.

Her hand once more lifted. This time it was her right hand, and her palm was faced down. Another riddle? Something told me it wasn't an offering she was looking for this time. Perhaps the opposite? Was she granting me an offering? What should I ask? Something specific about how to improve my chances? Did I really want to know?

"You said before the gods were please I came. Does that mean they will want to offer me a blessing?" I asked with hesitation.

She thought for a moment. Then she spoke-

"The gods, they bless with careless hands,

To whom they choose, in distant lands.

No reason why, no rhyme nor cause,

Their gifts bestowed without a pause.

A fool may rise, a rogue may soar,

While others stand outside the door.

What is this gift, that falls like rain,

For those who stumble, fall, and strain?

The gods, they laugh, they love to see,

Who will rise from this gift, and who will flee.

For to them, it's sport, it's joy, it's play,

To watch the chosen stumble or sway.

The blessings fall, not on the pure,

But on the ones they find obscure.

A jester's crown, a warrior's sword,

A king's command, a beggar's word.

So tell me, mortal, what is this game,

Where all are chosen, yet none are the same?

The gods, they watch with hungry eyes,

They seek amusement, not the wise.

Their favour's fickle, their love untold,

But never doubt—they watch the bold.

Yet in your path, trials await,

The god of Greed will test your fate.

The god of Speed will twist your mind,

The god of War will leave scars behind.

The god of Chaos will make the clock rewind

And through it all, a mystery calls,

A hidden hand behind it all.

In the end, when all seems lost,

A choice will come, and you will be tossed.

To sign a pact with one unknown,

A sixth god's will, never shown.

Or fail, and let your future fall,

The choice you make will shape it all.

So heed this warning, weak but true,

The gods will watch and laugh at you.

But choose your path with heart and mind,

For what's ahead, you can never unwind.

And with that bidding message she vanished, before I could beg for a full translation.

For some reason, and not due to my intellectual prowess, her riddle rang clear in my mind. As much as it confused me, I was glad she hadn't answered with a yes or no. I'm sure given some thought, plenty of thought, her riddle will reveal much more to me then I could ever fathom. I wonder why she would help me. I wonder who she is, if not a deity, how did she end up here, and how did she know my fate? Could she even be trusted?

I pushed those thoughts from my mind. I should focus on myself for now, maybe we'll run into one another again. Still lost for words, reeling from her answer, I stumbled onwards, my fate still unclear, but one thing certain:

A riddle that long?

There was no way I was getting pulverized, not immediately at least.