I hesitated as I sat down, seeing Cedric had already started eating without waiting for me. He was entirely focused on his meal, paying no attention to his beautiful wife. Well, their relationship wasn't exactly in the best place after all.
I smiled at him. "How's the food?" I asked cheerfully.
"Huh?" Cedric looked puzzled when he saw me smiling at him. It seemed he was used to hearing loud complaints about divorce from Cathleen. No wonder he was confused by this version of her.
"Um, yes?" His confusion made me feel uncertain as well, but I quickly tried to steer the conversation into better territory. "It's been a while since we've seen each other. Don't you have anything you'd like to talk to me about?" I said calmly as I took a bite of food. I didn't know what it was, but it tasted good.
"Do you even care?" he said, not looking at me.
I almost choked on my food at his words. I stared at him, but he remained focused on his plate. I hadn't expected Cedric to act like this toward his wife. It seemed he held a grudge from being constantly pushed to divorce.
In the novel, it is clearly shown that Cedric loved Cathleen. He was even willing to die for her. However, since the novel was told from Zoya's perspective, their interactions mostly depicted fights or rare moments when they were getting along.
But this cold and untouchable version of Cedric made me doubt everything. Did he truly love Cathleen? I wasn't even trying to start a fight, yet his attitude caught me off guard. If this continued, it would be hard for me to mend things with him. Initially, I thought that since Cedric loved Cathleen, it would be easier to repair their marital bond.
"Of course, I care. My husband went off to war for a long time, and I'm curious about what happened to him. Isn't that a natural question?"
Cedric paused, stopping his meal. At last, he looked me in the eye.
"Are you sick? Why are you suddenly acting so kind?"
I returned his gaze with unwavering confidence. "Oh, not at all. I was just curious, that's all."
"Is there something you want from me?" My attempt at kindness made him think I had ulterior motives. "Just say it—anything except that divorce nonsense again."
Hearing Cedric's words touched me. He truly disliked the idea of divorce. I felt a pang of emotion. Cedric, everything you've done so far has been for Cathleen. If only she realized it. I envied Cathleen. If only I could meet a man like Cedric in my previous world.
My emotions shifted rapidly. Just moments ago, I was annoyed by his cold demeanor, yet now I was deeply moved by a single sentence.
"Are you crying?" Cedric's face showed surprise as he looked at me.
My tear-filled eyes made him think I was crying. "Oh, no, I'm not crying. I'm just moved because the food is so delicious." I quickly wiped my eyes.
Cedric handed me a handkerchief. "Then finish your meal. Don't let it go to waste."
I nodded in understanding. From what I remember in the novel, Cathleen rarely finished her meals. Her stress often took away her appetite.
Suddenly, Cedric stood up, his plate already empty. This meant he was about to leave the dining room.
"You're leaving? Can't we talk a bit longer?" I asked hesitantly.
"I have matters to attend to. We'll talk another time."
Without looking back, Cedric left the dining room, leaving me alone.
I exhaled a sigh of relief. This was only the beginning. There was still so much I needed to do to repair this relationship. Still, I felt our conversation was somewhat satisfying. Even though Cedric's cold and rigid demeanor forced me to think on my feet to keep talking to him, he still showed small gestures of care.
***
After finishing my meal, I hurried back to my room to rest. Honestly, I was still hungry, but the food was already gone. The portions prepared for Cathleen were not much to begin with. I might have to ask the head servant to increase her meal portions. If this keeps up, Cathleen will only get thinner.
"My Lady, it's me, Zoya." The sound of knocking interrupted my moment of lying down.
"Come in."
Zoya entered, her red hair immediately catching my eye and irritating me. She wasted no time and took a seat next to me.
"So, what is it you want to tell me, Zoya?"
"Actually…" Zoya's expression seemed hesitant as if she were afraid to reveal something.
"Go ahead and speak. You don't need to be scared." I gently stroked her hand, though her nature was anything but gentle.
"First, I must apologize, My Lady. I couldn't properly take care of Lord Cedric." Now the crocodile tears began to flow. Wow, Zoya truly was a skilled actress.
"What happened?" I tried to appear deeply curious about what she had to say.
"During the war… while at the barracks, Lord Cedric often met with some of the maidservants," she said, tears streaming down her face. "I even tried to warn him that you would be angry if he acted that way, My Lady, but he scolded me instead."
I tried to look angry, raising my voice. "How could he behave like that? Zoya! You're not lying, are you?"
"No, My Lady. I would even swear to it." Convincing as always, Zoya. But I already knew what kind of person you were. You truly were a master manipulator.
I pinched the bridge of my nose and let out a heavy sigh. I needed to look troubled by this revelation. "He forbids me from divorcing him, yet he's the one straying from me." I covered my face, pretending to be distraught.
Zoya patted my shoulder, attempting to comfort me. "Don't worry, My Lady. I will always be here for you."
Liar.
"I was just trying to repair my relationship with him earlier, but if this is the case, it might be better to divorce him," I said, locking eyes with Zoya and holding her hands. "Once I leave this house, you'll stay by my side, won't you?"
Zoya nodded confidently. "Forgive me, My Lady, but did I hear you correctly? You said you wanted to repair your relationship?" Without realizing it, Zoya gripped my hands tightly. I knew she was hiding her anger now.
"Yes. After nearly two years of Cedric being away at war, I've done a lot of thinking and came to that decision earlier."
"Don't do it, My Lady. No matter what happens, don't go back to him."
Of course, I knew you were desperate to replace me as Cedric's wife.
"I'm not sure. Part of me wants to divorce him, but another part still wants to stay as his wife."
"But you do want a divorce, don't you? That's what you just said," Zoya pressed.
I let out another heavy sigh. "I don't know, Zoya. Earlier, I really wanted to divorce him, but now that feeling suddenly changed."
I was thoroughly enjoying watching Zoya struggle to keep her emotions in check in front of me. It was so entertaining to toy with her feelings.
She continued to push me toward divorce, listing every flaw she could think of about Cedric. However, my feigned indecision frustrated her so much that she unconsciously raised her voice. She was exasperated with me.
"Zoya, calm yourself! It seems you need to rest."
"I will rest once you promise me that you'll divorce Lord Cedric. This is all for your own good."
I smiled at Zoya. "Yes, I'll try to promise."
But that's a lie.