As for Master Rancisis's lightsaber, I still had it with me. I had never managed to deliver it to Vader; circumstances had prevented that. I hid my own lightsaber in a concealed compartment of the small room I now occupied aboard the Ghost—a repurposed cargo hold. Its worn-down state didn't bother me; having a private space was enough. That small, dark place was perfect for burying who I once was.
During that time, I began interacting a bit more with the crew. Not because I wanted to, but because I understood that keeping their attention away from me was necessary. It seemed more prudent to blend in rather than remain completely isolated. Among everyone, Sabine was the one I found easiest to hold regular conversations with. We shared certain interests, especially in art and creativity. Though, to be honest, most of the time, I simply listened as she talked.
Today, Kanan finally asked if I wanted to join Ezra's training. I hesitated. Participating meant revealing skills I preferred to keep hidden, but refusing would raise suspicions. I couldn't afford that. I accepted, with the internal resolve to limit myself enough not to expose too much.
The training took place on Lothal. After landing, we headed to a remote area, far from any risk of being detected by Imperial probes.
"You need to get out of your own head. Make a connection with another being," Kanan said as he watched Ezra with a serious expression. I stood to the side, observing the scene with interest.
"Can we do this some other day?" Ezra asked, visibly unmotivated and unwilling to commit to the exercise.
"We can do it now. So focus," Kanan replied firmly, making it clear he wouldn't accept excuses.
Ezra sighed in resignation. "Just throw the rock."
Without hesitation, Kanan hurled a stone that ended up hitting a nearby creature. It was an animal I didn't recognize, though it resembled one of the feline species native to Lothal. The creature, clearly irritated, let out a threatening growl and assumed an aggressive stance toward us.
"I don't think it wants to connect." Ezra commented sarcastically, stepping back slightly in response to the animal's obvious hostility.
Ezra's frustration was evident. His attempt to connect with the animal was clumsy, unfocused. Kanan tried to guide him patiently, but Ezra was too impatient to listen. His complaints piled up quickly.
"Can you calm down for a moment?" I said in a calm but firm voice, addressing Ezra. "If you can't control your emotions, it'll be impossible to succeed. Connection isn't about dominance. It's about understanding and yielding."
My words seemed to catch Kanan's attention, but Ezra merely scoffed. "What do you know? I haven't even seen you try."
I didn't respond immediately. Instead, I stepped toward the feline, which had already adopted a defensive posture, ready to attack. I stopped at a safe distance and closed my eyes. I allowed the Force to flow through me, connecting with the creature. It didn't take long before I felt its aggression subside until it finally calmed down.
When I opened my eyes, I saw the feline approaching, more curious than threatening. Slowly, I knelt and extended a hand. The creature came closer, purring softly before allowing me to pet it.
Kanan watched with a slight smile but said nothing. Ezra, on the other hand, looked stunned. "How did you do that?" he asked, unable to hide his amazement.
"Connection isn't about imposing. It's about listening. Try again, but this time, set aside your frustration."
Ezra hesitated but eventually tried again. It wasn't perfect, but he managed to calm the feline enough for it to approach. His eyes lit up with excitement as he realized his progress.
"I did it. I actually did it!" he exclaimed, more excited than I would have expected.
"You didn't do it. The Force did. Learn to listen to it, and maybe you'll achieve more than just a fleeting moment."
My words seemed to dampen his mood, but I didn't care. If he wanted to improve, he needed to understand that his emotions were an obstacle, not an advantage.
Suddenly, TIE fighters flew overhead, surprising us and interrupting the moment.
"What are so many TIEs doing here?" Ezra asked.
"Nothing good. Come on, you two, follow me," Kanan said, starting to move toward the ships as Ezra and I followed closely behind.
The fighters landed at a small port where the pilots headed into a secluded bar. Inside, the rest of the crew—Hera, Zeb, and Sabine—were gathered. For a moment, I panicked, thinking they were after us, including me. But that seemed unlikely. My existence had been a secret to everyone except Vader until recently. Besides, the Emperor and Vader believed I was dead, so I doubted they were searching for me. The guards didn't seem to be after the Ghost crew either but rather a Rodian with an uncommon skin tone.
After they left, Ezra excused himself, saying he needed time alone, leaving the rest of us puzzled. But that was a thought for another time, as I now found myself helping Sabine with her art in a room aboard the Ghost seemingly reserved for her "creations," so to speak.
She spoke animatedly as she painted, while I merely listened, responding with monosyllables or brief comments when necessary.
"What do you think is going on with Ezra lately?" she asked suddenly.
"I don't know," I replied, though it was a lie. I could feel his internal conflict. "Maybe he's dealing with something he doesn't want to share."
Sabine nodded thoughtfully. "I guess it's about his past... I think Ezra is an orphan."
I didn't respond. Talking about lost parents wasn't something that interested me. I didn't know mine, and that absence had never weighed on me. But I understood it could be different for others.
When the ship suddenly shook, Sabine lost her balance on the ladder she was painting on. Instinctively, I moved to catch her before she hit the ground. It was an automatic, calculated movement. However, I didn't expect our gazes to meet so closely as I held her.
"Thanks," she murmured, slightly awkward, but said nothing more.
The door opened, breaking the moment. Kanan and Zeb stood there. The former looked at us curiously, while the latter burst into laughter.
"Did we interrupt something?" Zeb asked, amused.
"No." I responded coldly, quickly helping Sabine back to her feet.
"It was just an accident," Sabine intervened, though she looked slightly embarrassed.
"Sure, an accident..." Zeb continued laughing, but I didn't react. I simply walked away, wanting to avoid more unnecessary questions.
"What is it, Kanan?" I asked, attempting to change the subject.
"Team meeting now. Come when you're done with… whatever this is," he said, clearly willing to move past the moment.
I didn't reply and quickly left the room to head to the meeting, while an uncomfortable feeling settled in my chest. I couldn't afford distractions. My purpose was clear: to take revenge on Vader. Any emotional connection, no matter how small, would be a weakness I couldn't allow myself.