I always wondered what happens after death. Would my soul be shrouded in darkness? would my blood boil, my mind replaying my small life. I didn't really get to live much of a life.

Despite having the money and power now, I could never shake off the cold ruthlessness that had developed during my youth. There are many people who used to eat on the streets with me who now hate me, and envy me. The path I walked was not easy; I worked long nights, hurting myself to live a better future. I forgot about sleep, working myself to the bone so that I could live a better life. But I didn't know that living a better life would be a thorn in so many peoples lives. 

The cold night air bit into my skin, my body being thrown onto the edge of a boat dock. The sound of crashing waves filled my ears, the metal wire rope digging deep into my limbs, my body tied up in an uncomfortable angle. Two pairs of hands gripped my arms, lifting me and tossing me onto a boat. The boat was small and old; clearly having seen better days. The wooden hull creaked with each sway of the waves, the icy water lapping at the edges of the boat, seeming to taunt him with his fate. The sails were torn and tattered, the cloth rippling in the wind. I could clearly feel my death closing in on me, the chill of darkness laughing in my face.

Who am I to delude myself?

I'm fucked.

I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath. I can't escape the reality of this situation. I'm trapped on a boat, my last journey in these deep roaring waters. My mind raced looking for a solution, but it's futile. I guess human beings do have a inherent instinct to survive; even in the face of doom.

But I'm no hero, and I'm not a powerful villain with lackeys coming to save me. There's no lover screaming for me to live, the only eyes on me begging for my downfall.

I opened my eyes, only to be met with a pair of sparkling green eyes. There were small specks of brown, the cold emotionless gaze becoming a desolate forest. These were eyes I thought I knew best. These are the eyes I followed on the corners of the streets, the eyes I smiled into after a hard day of begging, sharing the hard loaf of bread with expired hot sauce, our mouths steaming with only the rainfall as hydration. The betrayal stung, like a knife had been stabbed into my lungs. It was hard for me to breathe. 

The man who had once been my closest ally now stood over me, a cruel smirk on his face. His tall muscular frame towered over me, his green eyes glinting with malice as he looked down at me, his half scarred face twisting into a cruel smile. I never thought that his burns were scary, I always looked into his eyes and treated him as an equal. People would say the burns are deep and ugly, his skin marred and rubbery. I remember the day it happened - he stood tall against his attackers, never screaming or crying as they took a metal pipe and burned it into a fire, then putting the red hot pipe onto his face, the smell of the charred skin. I stared at the same shoulders, except now it seems I'm on the opposite side.

Carson, my best friend, the very shoulders I vowed to follow.

"Why?" I asked, my voice coming out strained, the hoarseness adding to the solemnity of the situation. "I trusted you with my life- now you want to take mine?"

Carson chuckled, a cold heartless sound I've never heard before. His voice echoed through the night air, dripping with venom. "You know, you've always been too smart for your own good. I just felt that since you've gotten so powerful, it makes sense for me to take it." Carson continued his tirade, his eyes roaming over my face, his gaze filled with envy. " I couldn't have you out there keeping this for yourself, now could I? I've been in your shadow this whole time, overlooked." Carson reached out, his cold long fingers brushing under my eyes, wiping the tears that I didn't even realize were falling. The cold touch jarred me; I was so disgusted. "this appearance of yours isn't too bad, huh?" Carson's hands gripped my jaw, clenching it so tight that my mouth popped open, my head forcefully being lifted up. His eyes darkened with jealousy, the negative emotions had eaten him alive for years, fueling his resentment and envy. "You always had everything even when we had nothing. You're so optimistic. Everyone always loved you no matter what, they only extended their hands out to me because I was with you. And the worse part about it? You thought that giving me pieces of what you've earned would help me right?" Carson snickered, "All it did was make me want to tear it out of your hands, and make it mine." 

Even if my heart was being torn out my chest, my very existence laughing at me, I still needed to say my piece - no, I was going to. I steeled myself, gazing into the eyes of my once best friend, my voice cold, disdain laced palpably in my words. " You're nothing but a jealous coward. No matter what you tell yourself, you are pathetic. I offered everything to you. I gave you everything I've ever had. You had no reason to be jealous, or feel envy. It was yours too from the beginning, you inadequate son of a bitch!"

Carson's face twisted in anger, his hand raising as if he wanted to beat me. 

"Do it, you stupid bitch. Don't be a pussy now" I growled, my body jerking upright as Carson lifted me, my head at his collar. He turned my body around, my back against his body. One hand was under my chin, the other hand resting on my nape, the dark sea in front of me. The water at night was a dark and menacing sight; the waves churned and crashed on the side of the boat, the black surface reflecting a dull reflection of the moon. I never realized the water I always loved would be so cruel and unforgiving at night. The air was heavy with foreboding, my heart turning to steel as I came to terms with this sinister water - my soon to be resting place.

Carson leaned in close, his breath rushing into my ears. 

Carson's hands tightened from both sides in a vice-like grip, and with a swift and brutal motion, my neck was twisted, breaking with a sickening snap. My body went limp in Carson's arms, his hold on me the only thing keeping me from dropping. I could feel the life draining out of my body, a cold numbing sensation spreading through me. My senses started to dull, my vision blurring as darkness closed in on me. The moon stared back at me, the pain sharp and intense but fleeting, replaced with a strange eerie calmness as my body shut down, my lungs unable to breath. I slowly suffocated to death, in the arms of my once best friend. At the end, I heard him say one last thing.

"Say hello to hell for me, although I won't be joining you anytime soon."

My body plunged into the dark, icy waters below, my last seconds filled with the cold water entering my lungs. My broken neck made it impossible for me to help myself. The seawater filled my throat, burning and choking me as darkness finally engulfed me, my lifeless body sinking, a shell of what it once was.

The sea falls silent once more, only Carson's breath could be heard. The night is still as if nothing had happened, but beneath the surface, Damien's body drifted away, forever loss in the abyss known as the ocean.

***

My eyes opened, the sharp pain in my chest burning me as if my lungs were on fire; I gasped for air, but the feeling of suffocation persisted, leaving me disoriented and panicked. My body was lifted, and I could see two purple eyes staring at me, a mixture of relief and love swirling in them. She cradled me in her arms, speaking soothing words to me. 

Have I been reborn?