Rosa where did you get all this money from?jancito asked shocked,rosa had been away all week only to be back with a lot of cash,scammed a local bank don't ask me the details long story Rosa replied coldly taking off her fur coat and changing into a comfortable leather jacket,is that even save? The cops might catch us this time jacinto said concerned,you were never part of this so don't use the phrase us I can clean my own shit Rosa said without looking at him grabbing the back of money she reached for the door Cecilio called you know jacinto said stopping Rosa from leaving she suddenly froze at the spot he's been Calling all week checking on you he's worried you know he said to tell you to not meet leon alone atleast go with someone Rosa?,leave Cecilio out of this he no longer one of us he left...and you let him? Jacinto cut rosa short jacinto stay out of it parez who had been smoking silently said, I need to know what her problem is! Why did you suddenly let Cecilio go? He cared about you the most,he worried about you the most,he was always there for you whenever you needed a ride he stood at the front door with the keys in his hand waiting for your call,he torolated you like nobody ever did he was always there silently watching you when you'd get drunk he'd wash you and made sure you went to sleep comfortably did you even slightly care at all for you to be able to let him go? Say something Rosa Jacinto said with his voice slightly pitched,if you have nothing else to say then I'll leave if you can't suck up to me then leave join Cecilio I can survive without you or him Rosa said coldly turning towards the door then Jacinto's voice echoed in her ears was it because he confessed to you?Jacinto suddenly asked what!? He told you that? Rosa asked lowly,No but I've always known,I've always known that your dark soul would never accept him they say that we get what we deserve but you never deserved Cecilio Rosa Jacinto said angrily rosa's eyes widened in shock she was speechless there was a sharp pain in her chest she had heard so many hurtful words from people but today these words from jacinto's mouth hurt more than a stray bullet she hated this feeling,why are you so quiet? Got nothing more to say? Tell me what are you so afraid of huh?Jacinto what's gotten into you? Parez asked pulling him away from Rosa's fury gaze stop it already don't stick your nose into other people's business parez said visibly concerned.
What am I so afraid of? asked no one specifically after a brief silence she chuckled lightly and sad "feelings"those things that tend to control humans more than anything love,hate,anger,deception,greed,lust all these years I have managed to numb all that feelings and live with one face forever,selling that soul that aroused those feelings I thought I finally did that until the day Cecilio confessed to me lots of emotions came running through me I was confused,angry furious,Happy,loved,ashamed,nervous and sick at the same time and it only gave me a splitting headache I never wanted things to turn out this way but if this is what love is then I do not want it Rosa said almost tearing up grabbing her bag and dashing off .parez turned his head facing jacinto with a look in his eyes saying what have you done,but Jacinto seemed unbothered.
here! have a beer parez said handing a can of beer over to jacinto,he sat next to him staring at the moon quietly till he suddenly spoke what was that about?parez asked calmly,I suddenly had an outburst jacinto replied sipping his beer, well that's unlike you don't you think? what was the point you went a little too far parez said looking at Jacinto,Jacinto chucked down a large amount of beer before replying I went to see Cecilio,he's with a friend from high school and he's also teaching at a Taekwondo school,good to know he's OK parez replied sipping his beer,if only Rosa cared,if only she went looking for him all she could have done was say stay and Cecilio would be glad to,he asked me did she ask someone to know if I was OK at least and I replied No none of us were asked to look for you,I could see the pain in his eyes when he replied I've always known that would be the case I just will never be ready to hear the words,I'm so pathetic Rosa deserves better when Cecilio said those words I was frustrated if there was anyone who deserved better it should be him.....maybe rosa thought so too parez cut him short maybe she feels Cecilio deserves better,rosa could never love Cecilio the way he loved her even if she tried the fact that he stirs up feelings in her should be more than she can handle please Jacinto cut her some slack parez said laying on the floor,after a long silence jacinto didn't reply to parez at all,parez decided to speak again;have you ever been in love he asked his question shocked Jacinto he never expected parez to ask such a question cause parez was never the type to like getting involved in things that was never his business but that question reminded me of my past Jacinto thought to himself a past with diego,I had always liked boys but I never told anyone a was afraid no one would see me as normal so I kept it to myself not until my closest friend diego found out,he didn't judge me at all instead he dated me he said he loved me dearly and wanted to be with me forever at first I was insecure but slowly I brought down my walls I fell deeply in love that I was willing to do anything for him one day he said he was uncomfortable with always coming in through the window just to hide from my parents I didn't want him to be sad at all so I came out to my parents,that night I told them I was dating Diego the guy they thought was just a friend forgetting how sickly religious my family was,my parents were beyond disappointed in me they felt disgusted when I said it my mum called the church immediately to come take me I begged,crying my brains out that I was still there son and nothing changed but they still let me go I was devastated almost losing my mind in the church,they kept reminding him constantly that I would burn in hell in the early mornings they would whip Me with a cane and pray intensively for my life to be saved, in the afternoon they would make me kneel for three hours praying to God to change me, in the evening they would show me pictures of how God made man and woman to be, I recall one early morning the priest was whipping me and praying then he stopped praying and asked me are you ready to be free? and I replied with a question saying is one page of the bible worth a life? the priest got furious and beat me till I was unconscious,I couldn't take it anymore and decided to runaway when I succeeded I had no where to go the only one I could think of was diego I ran to him with hope of finding peace at his blossom but the reverse was the Case he said he never loved me that he just had his fun and I had no right to be here i was supposed to be at the church receiving cleansing that I wasn't normal my heart was broken to a million pieces I recalled the day I knelt at that alter staring at the bleeding statue of the lords son and I asked him father do we get what we deserve? Today standing before this man I once loved reject me to my face I just thought to myself I guess we do get what we deserve the pain was too much to bear I couldn't cry anymore cause I've wasted all my tears already,there was no tears to give anymore.
No I've never been in love Jacinto finally answered parez's question for people like me love only exist in fairy tales Jacinto added. I'm not one to stick my nose in someone's business so I won't ask further when you feel comfortable you can tell me about it I'll always listen parez said calmly Jacinto was never proud of his past this wasn't a story he was willing to share to anyone not even at confession he felt it was better of known by just him than tell someone who would judge him or console him.sure gracias parez Jacinto replied with a smile.