Chereads / I Level Up by Pooping! / Chapter 6 - Baby Charm and Village Shenanigans

Chapter 6 - Baby Charm and Village Shenanigans

Another day in the life of Andreas, the baby genius—or as the villagers probably saw me, "the unusually giggly poop machine." It wasn't easy being the reincarnated son of two cleaning enthusiasts who were one spilled drink away from declaring war on stains. But hey, I had my quests, I had my system, and I had my teeth-free smile. Life was… manageable.

[WOMAN SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]

Mom was bustling around the kitchen, humming some tune I didn't recognize. Her precision with housework was both inspiring and terrifying. She cleaned like her mop was Excalibur, and every dust bunny was a mortal foe.

Meanwhile, Dad was outside chopping firewood. Well, "chopping" might be an understatement. The man was turning logs into splinters like they owed him money. Sometimes I wondered if that was his version of stress relief. With a wife like Mom, it wouldn't surprise me if wood-splitting therapy was his go-to.

I lay in my crib, staring at the ceiling and planning my next move. The system had been quiet today, but I wasn't about to let that stop me from leveling up. My quest for Charisma yesterday had gone better than expected—now I just needed a reason to keep working on my social stats.

That reason arrived in the form of a knock on the door.

The door opened to reveal the baker, carrying her usual basket of bread. She was all smiles, her cheeks pink from the morning chill—or maybe from excitement. Every time she saw me, she acted like I was the highlight of her day.

[BAKER SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]

She bent down to peek into my crib, her bright eyes sparkling. I wasn't sure what she said, but judging by her tone, it was something like "Who's the cutest little baby in the village?"

Obviously, she was talking about me.

"Well, if it isn't my biggest fan," I thought, beaming up at her.

I hit her with my patented toothless grin, complete with a little wave of my chubby hand. She practically melted.

[BAKER SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]

She poked my cheek lightly, laughing at my reaction. Honestly, I was a little offended. I might be a baby now, but I was still a man on the inside! Did she think I wouldn't notice her sneaky attempts to pinch my face?

[WOMAN SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]

Mom's voice rang out, and the baker straightened up quickly, as if caught stealing cookies from a jar. She handed over the bread with a few polite words, but her eyes kept darting back to me. I could practically see the internal debate in her mind: Do I risk another cheek pinch?

To her credit, she resisted. Barely.

As she left, I sighed in my crib. My baby charm was clearly working overtime, but what good was all this attention if I couldn't capitalize on it? Not that I was looking for a relationship or anything—it was just nice to feel appreciated. Even if I had to drool to get there.

Later that day, Mom and Dad took me to the village square. Apparently, there was some kind of festival going on—a lively market filled with colorful stalls, musicians, and enough food smells to make my tiny stomach growl.

[WOMAN SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]

Mom chatted with one of the stall owners while Dad carried me in a sling on his chest. The view from up here was pretty good, though I wasn't thrilled about being strapped in like a kangaroo joey.

As we walked through the crowd, I noticed a group of young women glancing my way. They giggled, whispering to each other behind their hands. One of them—a tall brunette with bright eyes—boldly approached us.

[BRUNETTE SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]

She leaned down to pinch my cheek, cooing at me in a high-pitched voice that was probably supposed to sound sweet but came off more like an air raid siren.

"Oh, come on," I thought. "Not you too."

[BRUNETTE SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]

The brunette turned to Dad, saying something that made him chuckle nervously. Judging by his awkward smile, I guessed she'd complimented his parenting skills—or his genetics. Either way, I wasn't impressed.

"You think you can charm me with cheek pinches and baby talk? Think again, lady."

But, against my better judgment, I smiled at her. It was part of my Charisma training, after all. The system didn't care if my dignity took a hit, as long as I leveled up.

[SYSTEM ALERT: Charisma +1!]

Totally worth it.

As the day went on, more villagers stopped to admire me, each one adding to my growing reputation as the cutest baby in town. By the time we got home, I was exhausted. Who knew being adorable was such hard work?

Mom and Dad put me back in my crib, their usual cleaning routine kicking into high gear. I watched them from my cozy spot, wondering how two people could have so much energy for chores.

[WOMAN SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]

[MAN SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]

Mom scolded Dad for something—probably a wrinkle in the tablecloth. He nodded sheepishly, grabbing the iron to fix it. I couldn't help but laugh. For all their quirks, they were a good team. Weird, but good.

As I drifted off to sleep, I couldn't shake the feeling that tomorrow would bring even more chaos. In a world like this, anything was possible—and with my luck, it probably involved more cheek pinching.