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Chapter 7 - Chapter 7: The Struggle of Change

The first magic of their connection, of course, started to run up against the tragic realities of their

completely different lives as John and Emma's relationship grew. It was a bond they fought to

keep, yet each battled internal struggles that said more than just 'ok, I'm going to put in the work

for us,' they said more about the work they'd already started within themselves.

1. Social Scrutiny and Disapproval

His friends, colleagues and even members of his family couldn't make heads or tails of John's

fascination with Emma. For them, she was an outsider — a woman from a different world —

utterly incapable of understanding his ambitions, much less fitting into his upper class circle.

They spoke openly over drinks and dinners of their concerns. They tut tutted away that getting

involved with someone not on his level would drag him down and tarnish his reputation. Marcus,

John's closest friend and business partner thus was the most vocal in bringing John back to the

reality that they'd had to sacrifice a lot to build SnowCorp. It was a distraction, and an

unnecessary, troublesome complication, in his eyes.

He opposed these opinions, and sometimes stood up to them, watching as he strained his oldest

relationships in order to do so. His friends' shallow values, and their judgmental comments no

longer pained him, but their disapproval did. He also realized how deeply he'd been ingrained in

a world of wealth and status, and what that meant about how lonely this new life could

sometimes be.

2. Emma's Insecurities

John was battling external pressure, Emma internal pressure. John's drive and success had been

praised by her, but she couldn't separate that from the fact that she didn't believe she belonged in

his world. But when the two were out partying together, she felt like she was an outsider and that

John introduced her into his network proudly. It felt like a pat on the cheek and patronizing small

talk, and the glances she'd get, and the patronizing small talk, just made her feel like she was just

some latest 'project', or accessory.

Emma was fiercely independent and didn't want to be dependent on John's wealth or on him. It

was not the reality that John frequently insisted on paying for things she simply could not afford

and yet there was something she simply could not reconcile with her pride. She hated feeling

beholden to his generosity and would sometimes argue with him, some thing in silence. She

worried he'd feel her resentment and run, but couldn't figure out how to clarify that she needs to

stand on her own.

3. Clashing Values and Philosophies

The force that had brought them together — their life philosophies — became a source of

conflict when they double dated. John still liked results, efficiency, control—all the things that

made him a good businessman, but that sometimes rubbed Emma the wrong way. When he said

he would help her get her nonprofit's operations streamlined with suggested performance metrics

and benchmarks, Emma bristled, she felt like he wanted to turn her heartfelt mission into another

venture. She was concerned he was losing sight of the heart of her work, work founded on

compassion and not profit.

Back in the g'hrid, meanwhile, John couldn't understand why Emma resisted his ideas. From his

perspective he was promising solutions that would expand and enhance her organization's ability

to reach into and impact the world. To each other they were an impasse: they wanted to help sell

each other, unable to see beyond a set of their own beliefs. These conflicts also frustrated them

and they'd each wonder if they really could coexist while compromising their own values.

4. The Burden of John's Past

Emma got to know John more intimately and began to see the emotional weight he carried from

his past. She knew betrayal, and cutthroat decisions, and loneliness that sprung, inevitably, from

his success. She made John vulnerable to her with things he hadn't been with anyone else, scars

he hadn't shown not even to himself. Opening up also introduced him to fears he didn't even

know he had.

That made him fear that Emma could come to hate the world he existed in and have enough of

the ruthless part of him that he hadn't excised out entirely. However, he was plagued with guilt

because he wasn't worthy of what people like Emma were capable of. In the best of cases he

would find himself retreating emotionally, scared of losing her but petrified of the full

vulnerability too. In turn, Emma could feel his hesitation and it just about tore her heart away.

She worried that he might keep part of himself at arm's length, enough of a distance to detach

them.

5. The Test of Commitment and Sacrifice

The biggest test there was their commitment and sacrifice. With John, Emma thought she had

found the man of her dreams, and she was offered a leadership position in her organization, an

opportunity she'd always wanted, but it meant long hours and meant even more time away from

John. Meanwhile, SnowCorp was pressuring John to take an acquisition that would demand his

entire attention. They felt both pulled in opposite directions; wondering if the relationship would

be just one more altar of ambition sacrifice.

It frightened Emma to think that she would have to give up her dreams of a career and she was

scared to imagine losing the man she had come to love. John offset his own fear of seeming

weak, his fear of falsely enacting his commitment to his company, by the fear of losing Emma. It

all resulted in long, difficult conversations and many late nights spent wondering why they made

the choices they did. Silently, each wondered if, in reality; they could have it all, or if love, by its

very nature necessarily required some things that neither were yet ready to give up.

John and Emma would both begin to see how deep the changes they'd both been making were

through these struggles. From all of this they learned that love wasn't about connection, it was

about choosing to keep moving forward together when things are tough. This meant, for John,

that he had to lose his pride, honor Emma, and accept that love cannot be possessive or a thing

that you control. It was a hard thing for Emma to have to confront her insecurities, to trust that

she could love John the way that he loved her despite their different worlds.

This was a journey each helped the other become more self aware and compassionate. They

knew the road lay ahead would be full of additional challenges, but they were starting to feel that

working together they could be stronger. The struggle itself was painful, but it had brought them

closer as never before; it had brought them together as one Man, trusting in the inevitable

redemption of all things.