SYDNEY
"I'm busy," I said rudely to Jason and walked away.
"Nowadays, you're always busy!" he grabbed my arm and pulled me to himself. "I miss you, Sydney. I miss you so much, " he said and looked into my eyes.
I turned away from him knowing that my face would reveal that I missed him even more. Why did he have to make things harder than they already were?!
"Let go of me," I said and pushed him away. He didn't let me go.
"Tell me what I did Sydney. Let me make it up to you. What do you want? Sydney, I'd give you anything." He looked like he was on the verge of tears. But so was I when his – our father ruined my life.
"You'd give me anything?" I laughed in a bid to force myself not to cry. He couldn't give me back the 9 years of loneliness and pain I had to endure while he lived in the fatherly love that should have been mine. He couldn't heal me from my trauma, and he couldn't have helped my mom either. He couldn't help me get over these feelings I know are wrong to have for him.
I walked away. I wouldn't let him see me lose myself. He didn't give up and pulled me back to him.
"At least tell me what I did," he said quietly.
"You ruined my life. That's what you did" I whispered back to him. He looked shocked, then confused, and then heartbroken. His emerald, green eyes looked like they'd reduced in hue and even though what I'd said hurt me just as much as it did him, I walked away. This time, he let me go and just stood there watching me walk away.
I picked up my phone and dialed Tyra's number, silently praying she would answer but as always, for the last few weeks, she didn't. I felt like kicking myself. I'd been so caught up in a fever dream with Jason that I hadn't thought twice about her. I was a terrible friend. What was happening to everything? My best friend has disappeared, and my boyfriend is my half-brother from the idiot who broke my mom's heart and abandoned me. My life was crashing down, and I needed to talk to someone, but Tyra and Jason were out of the option and frankly, I didn't have any more friends.
"Hey babe, wassup. Umm… call, chat, tweet, snap, anything. I miss you so much. I need you right now. If you're angry at me cuz of Jason, I get it and I'm so, so sorry. Really. If you forgive me call back. I miss you, girl." I said to her in yet another voice message. I'd lost count of how many I'd already sent.
The school day was over, and I had to walk home because my mom's car needed a trip to the mechanic. I pulled out a pair of air pods from my pocket and played music loudly, ignoring the warning, as I headed home. I could barely hear anything aside from the music playing, which is exactly why I didn't notice the blue car slowly coming up behind me. A street away from my home, I finally realized I was being followed.
"Don't freak out" I thought.
I turned off the music and headed down a different street, took a right turn, then a left, and looked back to check if I was still being followed.
I was.
I slowly increased my speed and so did the car and soon I was running without knowing where I was going. Big mistake! I hit a dead end and before I could run out of it, I was cornered.
The door of the car opened slowly, as if teasing me and I expected to see a masked figure step out of the car with a gun or something in his hand. What I saw was much, much worse. It was a man of tall stature with bright green eyes and an olive-type complexion with curly brown hair - It was a face I'd recognize anywhere.
My father. He had a knife in his hand and fear surged through my veins as terrible memories surfaced in my mind. I held my composure against my will and looked him in the eye.
"What do you want with me? After all these years?!" I said to him
"Oh! You recognize me?" he said. I couldn't read what might be going on in his mind.
"You're the man who ruined my life. Why wouldn't I?" I said as rudely as I could.
"Is that the reason you're now ignoring my son, Sydney? Because you recognize me?" he said, ignorant of my attitude.
"Your son? I didn't know you could acknowledge your children" I said more hurt than I hoped I sounded. The jealousy I'd hidden away for Jason bubbled on the surface.
"Sydney, mind your mouth. You have no idea what happened so don't get into a problem that doesn't concern you"
"'That doesn't concern me'? Is that supposed to be a joke? You abandoned me and almost killed my mom all so you could run into another woman's arms and pretend we never existed" I screamed at him and felt tears run down my cheeks "And now you have the audacity to tell me to mind my mouth. What the hell is wrong with you?"
He looked lost for words for the first time and walked up to me slowly. His knife fell giving him a chance to cup my face in his palms. "What did that mad woman tell you?" he said with a hurt look in his eyes. I wanted so desperately to stay there in his arms, but I knew better.
"Madwoman?!" I screamed and pushed him away from me. "How dare you? You tried to kill me and my mother. You left me and never came back. Not one word. Not one kobo. And now you chase me and corner me with a knife in your hands. Who is the mad one here?" The hurt I felt quickly morphed into a murderous rage.
I wanted to hurt him the same way he hurt us. I wanted him to feel every ounce of pain I had felt for the past 9 years. I wanted to watch him beg and suffer. I wanted to see him bleed the same way I bled.
I quickly ran away from him, adrenaline fueling my veins, and picked up the knife he had dropped and before I thought it through, I had slashed him through his belly just like he did to me. I smiled as he groaned in pain and the warm feel of blood engulfed me. I pulled out the knife from him ready to stab him again when he punched me square in the jaw.
I flew back with force from his blow, banged my head hard on a wall, and as soon as I felt that warm bloody feeling again down my neck, I fainted. Again