I checked my phone - 3:45. The station plaza stretched out before me, surprisingly empty for a weekend afternoon. My Lotus Ones squeaked against the polished floor as I adjusted my bucket hat, trying to get it to sit right without messing up my hair.
Todo stood near the central pillar, wearing what looked suspiciously like a modernized hakama paired with a Supreme t-shirt. Somehow, he made it work. Midoriya hunched next to him, buried in his phone, probably researching that hero merch shop.
"Brother!" Todo's voice boomed across the plaza, making Midoriya jump. "Your attire! It speaks to my soul!"
I glanced down at my outfit - just some comfy streetwear I'd thrown together. "Thanks? Though I see you snuck in some traditional wear anyway."
"These are designer hakama pants," Todo said proudly. "Perfectly acceptable casual wear."
"We tried to talk him out of it," Midoriya sighed, finally looking up from his phone. "But he said something about honoring his ancestors while embracing modern fashion?"
"The ancient and the new, joined in harmony!" Todo struck a pose that would have looked ridiculous on anyone else. On him, it seemed almost natural.
I leaned against the pillar. "So where are the others?"
"Kaminari texted saying he's running late because his hair wouldn't cooperate." Midoriya scrolled through his messages. "Kirishima's helping Sero with something, but they should be here soon."
"Ah, then we have time to discuss more important matters." Todo turned to me, his expression serious. "Brother, about your romantic endeavors-"
"Nope."
"But-"
"Had enough of that from Mom last night." I pulled my hat lower. "Besides, weren't you excited about air hockey?"
Todo's eyes lit up. "Yes! Midoriya has been explaining the principles to me. It seems like a noble sport, combining strategy with raw power!"
"It's... just air hockey," Midoriya said quietly.
"Just air hockey?" Todo gasped. "From what you described, it's a battle of wits and reflexes! A test of one's very spirit!"
I caught Midoriya's eye. "You've created a monster."
He rubbed the back of his neck. "I just showed him some YouTube videos..."
"Speaking of which!" Todo pulled out his phone. "I've been studying professional techniques. Observe!"
He proceeded to demonstrate what he called "advanced paddle manipulation" using his phone as a makeshift puck. Several passersby stopped to stare as he added sound effects.
"Should we stop him?" Midoriya whispered.
I shook my head. "Let him live his dream."
"SWOOSH! The angle of attack must be precisely calculated!" Todo spun dramatically. "The wrist rotation is key!"
My phone buzzed - a message from Kaminari:
"omw!! had to redo my whole style after seeing this sick tiktok-"
Another buzz interrupted:
"yo we got a problem" - Kirishima
"tape boy's stuck"
"like literally stuck"
"might be a few min late"
"send help"
I showed the messages to Midoriya, who immediately started muttering about quirk interactions and chemical compounds.
"Todo," I called out, interrupting his one-man air hockey show. "Slight change of plans. We need to rescue Sero."
Todo straightened up. "A hero's work is never done! What's the situation?"
"His tape quirk's acting up."
"Ah, the eternal struggle between style and function!" Todo nodded sagely. "Fear not, I know just the solution. My family has a secret technique-"
"Guys?" Midoriya held up his phone. "Kaminari says he's almost here. Maybe we should split up? Some of us go help Sero while others secure a table at the bar?"
I considered it. "Good thinking. Todo, you're with me on rescue duty. Midoriya, you okay handling Kaminari and the bar?"
He nodded, then hesitated. "Um, about the All Might shop..."
"We'll hit it after food," I promised. "Though maybe we set a time limit just in case?"
"I won't take that long!"
Todo and I shared a look.
"Okay, maybe I might," Midoriya admitted. "But did you know they have a limited edition figure from his debut year? Only five hundred were ever made, and the paint job on the cape is slightly different from the regular version because of a manufacturing error that actually makes it more accurate to his original costume-"
"And we've lost him," I sighed. "Todo, let's go. Midoriya, text us the bar's address?"
"Hm? Oh, right!" He snapped out of his All Might trance. "Good luck with Sero!"
Todo struck another pose. "We shall return victorious! And then..." He pointed dramatically at a nearby trash can. "Air hockey awaits!"
"Wrong direction," I said.
"I knew that." He adjusted his pose accordingly. "Now, onwards! To save our sticky friend!"
I adjusted my hat again as Todo and I made our way down the crowded street. The afternoon sun beat down, making me wish I'd brought sunglasses. Between my white hair and distinctive eyes, I stood out like a beacon.
"Your sense of direction remains as remarkable as ever, brother," Todo said, scanning the street signs.
"Hey, I got us this far."
A group of high school girls whispered and pointed as we passed. One pulled out her phone, not-so-subtly trying to get a photo.
"The USJ guy!"
"Is that really him?"
Todo stepped slightly in front of me, using his height to block their view. "Perhaps we should acquire some disguises?"
"Nah, it's fine." I waved at the girls, making them squeal and hurry away. "Though some shades wouldn't hurt. My eyes are giving me away."
"There's a convenience store." Todo pointed across the street. "We can-"
"Oh my god, it's Nakamura!" A guy in a business suit rushed up, phone out. "My daughter's a huge fan! Could I get a quick photo?"
"Sure, but we're kind of in the middle of-"
"DAD, YOU'RE EMBARRASSING ME!" A teenage girl in a school uniform appeared, yanking her father back. "I'm so sorry! I told him not to- wait, are you really...?"
I smiled. "Yeah, that's me. Yoichi Nakamura."
She went bright red. "I saw the footage from USJ! The way you fought that Nomu thing was incredible!"
"Thanks, but it wasn't just me. The whole class-"
"Could you sign my notebook?" She thrust a sparkly notebook and pen at me. "Please?"
Todo cleared his throat. "We do have a friend in need of rescue..."
"Right, sorry." I quickly signed the notebook. "Thanks for the support, but we've got to run."
We made it another block before getting stopped again. And again. Todo started using increasingly elaborate excuses to extract us from conversations.
"My sincerest apologies, but my friend must attend an urgent meeting with his pet iguana's therapist."
"The alignment of the stars demands we continue our journey post-haste!"
"We're actually on a classified mission to determine why chickens don't wear pants."
I bought some cheap sunglasses from a street vendor, but my hair still drew attention. After the fifth group of fans, Todo suggested we cut through some back streets.
"This should provide more discretion," he said, leading us down an alley. "Though I must say, your newfound fame is most impressive!"
"Yeah, well..." I ducked under some hanging laundry. "Fame's weird. One minute you're just trying not to die, next minute everyone knows your face."
"Indeed! Though perhaps we should focus on our current mission. Sero's predicament grows more dire with each passing moment."
"True. He's probably wrapped himself in even more tape by now." I checked my phone's map. "Should be just around this corner..."
We emerged onto a completely unfamiliar street.
"Brother," Todo said slowly. "I don't believe this is the correct direction."
I looked around. Nothing looked right. "Uh..."
"We've been walking for fifteen minutes."
"Yeah..."
"In the wrong direction."
I pulled up Kirishima's location pin again. We were somehow further away than when we'd started.
"In my defense," I said, "all these streets look the same."
Todo sighed deeply. "Truly, your navigation skills rival your cooking abilities."
"Hey, I'm getting better! That curry last week was almost edible."
A commotion from the main street caught our attention. Screams, then the distinctive sound of something large being smashed.
Todo and I shared a look. Hero time.
We rounded the corner to find chaos. A guy with some kind of growth quirk had expanded to three times normal size, swinging a street sign like a baseball bat. Glass littered the sidewalk from a smashed storefront.
"GIVE ME THE MONEY!" the villain bellowed, taking another swing at the terrified shop owner.
I watched the villain swing the sign again, glass crunching under his oversized feet. Todo tensed beside me, ready to move.
"We can't use our quirks," I reminded him quietly. "No license."
Todo's eyes narrowed. "Ah, but who says we need quirks?"
I grinned. "My thoughts exactly."
The villain roared again, demanding money from the trembling shop owner. Perfect setup. I adjusted my cheap sunglasses and stepped forward.
"Hey, big guy!"
The villain turned, sign creaking in his grip. "Who the hell are you?"
"Just a concerned citizen wondering if you've thought this through. I mean, robbing a shop at three in the afternoon? Not exactly criminal mastermind material."
"Brother," Todo whispered, "are you attempting to antagonize the large angry man?"
"Maybe."
The villain's face twisted. "You making fun of me, pretty boy?"
"Oh good, you caught that. Was worried the insult might be too subtle." I spread my arms. "Come on then, show me what you've got."
He charged, sign raised high. "I'll crush you!"
The massive fist came straight at my face. And stopped. Just... stopped. Like hitting an invisible wall.
The villain blinked. Pushed harder. Nothing.
I lowered my sunglasses, letting him see my eyes. "You know, this reminds me of that old story - Achilles and the..." I trailed off, noting his blank expression. "Never mind. That reference would probably go over your head. Todo?"
Todo's hand struck precisely, hitting a nerve cluster in the villain's neck. The giant toppled, shrinking as he fell unconscious.
"A most efficient takedown," Todo said, producing some zip ties from... somewhere. I decided not to ask why he carried those.
People emerged from the shops, phones recording. Someone started clapping. Then someone else recognized us.
"It's them! The USJ kids!"
"The ones who fought the villains!"
Todo bowed formally. "Please, remain calm. The situation is under control."
I helped him secure the villain while whispers spread through the growing crowd. Phones flashed. Great, more viral footage.
"Your timing continues to be impeccable," Todo noted as we waited for the pros. "Though perhaps next time, fewer literary references?"
"Everyone's a critic." I checked my phone. "Kirishima's gonna kill us. We're so late."
Sirens approached. Two figures landed nearby - Kamui Woods and Mt. Lady. Thank god it wasn't Death Arms. Last thing I needed was another lecture about proper protocols.
"Well, well." Mt. Lady sauntered over, grinning. "Look who it is. Pretty Eyes himself." She looked me up and down. "You've grown up since the sludge incident."
"Mt. Lady," I nodded. "Still rocking the purple?"
"Always. Though I see you've developed a style of your own." She gestured at the unconscious villain. "Nice work. Clean takedown."
"Indeed," Kamui Woods said, securing the villain with his branches. "Though perhaps next time alert the proper authorities first?"
"We were just passing by," Todo explained. "The situation required immediate action."
"Mm-hmm." Mt. Lady's grin widened. "And I'm sure you didn't use any quirks, right?"
I shrugged. "Don't need quirks to stop an amateur. Though if anyone asks, my eyes are just naturally this way. Genetic condition. Very tragic."
She laughed. "Still trouble, I see. Good to know some things don't change."
"Speaking of trouble," Todo cut in, "we have friends awaiting our arrival. And one is currently entangled in what I believe was described as a 'hair product disaster.'"
"Right." I stepped back as the police arrived. "We should..."
"Go," Mt. Lady waved us off. "We've got this. Try to stay out of trouble?"
"No promises."
Todo and I slipped away as the police started taking statements. Once we were clear, he pulled out his phone.
"Kirishima has sent seventeen messages. The latest one says, and I quote: 'dudes where r u sero looks like a mummy help.'"
I checked the map again. "Okay, this time I'm sure it's this way."
"That's what you said twenty minutes ago."
"Yeah, but this time I mean it."
Todo sighed deeply. "Perhaps we should acquire a guide dog for your directional challenges?"
"Or you could just lead the way, since you clearly know where we're going."
"And deprive you of this learning opportunity? What kind of friend would I be?"
I pulled my hat lower. "The kind that doesn't want to explain to Kirishima why we're an hour late?"
"An excellent point." Todo took the lead. "Though I must say, your taunting technique has improved significantly."
"Thanks. Been practicing on Bakugo."
We turned down another street, and I finally recognized the landmarks. Todo shot me a knowing look.
"Not a word."
"I wouldn't dream of it." He paused. "Though I do believe this validates my guide dog suggestion."
I was about to reply when my phone buzzed. A message from Midoriya:
"Kaminari's here! We got a table."
Another message popped up before I could respond to Midoriya:
"bro where are you???" - Kirishima. "sero's gonna die of embarrassment if more people see him like this"
Todo peered at my screen. "Perhaps we should increase our pace?"
"Yeah, probably." I pocketed my phone. "Lead on, O wise navigator."
We jogged through the backstreets, Todo somehow managing to make even that look graceful. Three blocks later, we found Kirishima pacing outside a convenience store.
"Finally!" He waved us over. "What took you so long?"
"Got lost," I said.
"Had to stop a robbery," Todo added.
"Both," I admitted. "Where's Sero?"
Kirishima scratched his head. "Uh, about that..."
"We're too late, aren't we?"
"Maybe?" He grinned sheepishly. "Look, he made me promise not to tell anyone what happened. Like, seriously. He threatened to tape my mouth shut for a week."
Todo stroked his chin thoughtfully. "A most serious threat indeed."
"Is he okay at least?" I asked.
"Oh yeah, we figured it out." Kirishima's sharp teeth flashed. "Though he might need therapy. And probably won't use that brand of hair gel again."
The convenience store door chimed. Sero stepped out, looking perfectly normal except for slightly damp hair and what appeared to be scissors marks on his shirt.
"Don't," he said before any of us could speak. "We never talk about this. Ever."
"But-" Todo started.
"Ever."