"What are you talking about?" Lily took a step back, bumping into the bushes lining the road.
"She didn't tell you? Well, I guess I understand why..." Erin seemed to have realized something.
"But who are you talking about, Erin?" Lily asked, exasperated.
"The girl inside you. Who else would it be?" Erin tilted her head slightly, confused. Her cheerful, innocent personality now seemed oddly disconnected.
Lily took a moment to process. Was she talking about... her?
The white-haired girl who had protected her and embraced her when she needed it most. Her sweet yet courageous personality had left a mark on Lily's mind. But how could someone so gentle be connected to that massacre?!
Impossible... She must have been a victim too.
Lily's eyes sharpened. In a serious tone, she asked again, "What happened there, Erin?"
Erin recoiled slightly, her expression becoming severe, as if mimicking Lily. Cruel words slipped easily from her lips: "I saw her kill every single one of them, even the test subjects. She looked like a raging predator. She almost tore me apart too, but I told her I was there because I'd already done the same. Then, she handed control over to you."
"Does that satisfy you?" Erin couldn't help a faint smile. She hid the part where the girl had made a heartfelt plea.
"Lily," with a downcast, lifeless look, had said, "Please, keep Lily safe, since I couldn't."
Recalling this memory, Erin lowered her gaze, pensive. She? Protect someone?
What a joke.
Lily, for her part, was left speechless.
In the end, she could only reach one conclusion. She was a monster.
A half-demon, half-dragon chimera with several personalities in her head.
It seemed laughable that, until now, she'd tried to defend something born from her warped mind.
Haha! A insane monster.
When this thought crossed her mind, it felt as if the pieces of a puzzle had clicked into place. It was a simple fact she hadn't wanted to accept until now.
Her denial had only led to prolonged torment.
In that moment, she felt a strange relief. The enormous burden that had haunted her for so many years had finally been uncovered and accepted.
All the fear of hiding her identity among normal humans, all the pain of grinding her horns down repeatedly, the bangs she'd grown out to conceal her shameful origin...
The whippings she endured simply for existing.
Unnoticed, two faint streams of tears ran down her face.
Sincerely, she said, "Thank you, Erin."
Such swift acceptance was unexpected for Erin. She'd thought Lily would break down crying, scream, deny everything, or lash out. Instead, she simply paused and then expressed gratitude?
*Ha.* For some reason, Erin felt irritated. It didn't seem like enough for her.
"If you're fine now, shall we continue?" Erin quickly masked her feelings, motioning for Lily to follow.
"Of course!"
Lily walked on, leaving a part of herself behind.
…
When she reached her dormitory, she immediately went to her desk to check the cultivation manual she'd received, unpacking it. At that moment, her only thought was training.
Only by becoming stronger could all the pain be repaid.
"Basic Body Arts Manual..." Reading this, she felt a bit disappointed. She'd innocently hoped for something like a "Darkness God Manual" to be given as her first cultivation book.
"They probably don't even have that," Lily muttered, shaking her head to dispel her disillusionment.
She opened the manual and saw the table of contents. It contained basic teachings like those Cielle had introduced, including breathing and mana flow techniques, progressing to beginner-level external qi manipulation. While it wasn't as grand as her imagination had hoped, manipulating qi in the real world was already something to take pride in.
She'd never seen anything like it before, and the thought of mastering it excited her!
Lily spent the entire afternoon memorizing and practicing some of the concepts. Eventually, she realized that the stretches she'd been doing weren't just to make her body more fit for exercises—they also helped with mana manipulation. Through these movements, she discovered the mana flow within her and began to move it slowly.
In this state, Lily entered a trance, focused solely on the subtle flow of mana in her body, without attempting to absorb more. Following the path Cielle had traced, she approached her heart, inching closer until she was about to delve into it...
A powerful shock coursed through her body. Her mana went haywire, and she collapsed to the floor, convulsing violently.
"ARGH!" she screamed loudly. Fortunately, the room's soundproofing was excellent.
The mana felt like a ravenous beast tearing through her meridians. Her draconic heart beat with unstoppable force, pumping mixed blood throughout her body.
Her eyes, nose, and mouth began to bleed, and her agonized cries grew louder until, finally, she passed out, utterly drained.
When she awoke, she found herself in a chair again. However, the blinding light that once obscured the other side was gone, leaving only a dim glow shrouding both sides. She looked around, the dark space feeling eerily familiar, as if countless hidden eyes were judging her for an unforgivable sin.
"Don't get distracted." A calm voice — no, one hiding simmering fury — spoke to her. It was Celestine.
She didn't bother with his unsteady tone. Instead, she looked at the cuffs on her wrists, chaining her to the chair, and suddenly came to a realization: the one who had offered her a chance in the lab was Celestine.
In other words, was the massacre caused by the girl, or was Celestine responsible? Or were they both in on it?
"Pay attention to me, insolent girl!" No longer restraining himself, Celestine slammed his fist on the armrest, the sound echoing sharply.
"Sorry," Lily said calmly.
Celestine didn't accept her apology, glaring at her with cold, piercing eyes.
"I don't like filth in my body."
"What?"
"I don't want filthy things entering me. Do you understand?" he continued, repeating the same assertion.
Lily grew agitated. Had she almost died because of this? "But I was just trying to channel the man—"
Suddenly, a scorching glare struck her. Celestine was truly furious. Trembling, Lily lowered her head, not daring to meet his gaze. The oppressive weight of his mere glance was indescribable.
"The mana in your body is rotten. That's the only explanation I'll give. Now, I will purge as much of this foulness as possible."
He looked away, disinterested.
"You might die, but consider it a blessing."