Chereads / I feel in love with a bastard / Chapter 8 - Chapter 7

Chapter 8 - Chapter 7

Felix stood over his mother's grave, mournfully gazing at the marble. He could not understand how people could be so cruel and ruthless as to kill an innocent person just because they had such a whim.

His sick mother lost her life because they decided to show him who dictates the terms and the consequences of turning your back on them.

He was unable to regret anything and think what it would have been like if he had not joined them because a year ago, he was forced to work with people he did not know completely. Even then, they threatened him with the loss of his loved ones, and he had no choice but to leave Clare and go. He did it to protect her.

With the top of his hand, he wiped away a lone tear that ran down his cheek. Although he did not have an intimate relationship with his mother, she was his only family, the person who raised him, so how could he remain callous to her loss?

- Word has reached me about what happened. I'm sorry. - He heard Clare's worried voice behind him. The blonde discreetly approached him and put her hand on his shoulder to show him support.

How did she find out?

- What did you hear? - he asked a nervous question, dreading the answer. Clare's discovery of the truth would be the last thing he needed right now.

- I know she was sick, but losing her so quickly did not allow you to come to terms with her death.

- How can you know that? How can you know what I feel?

- Don't forget who I am, how well I know you....

Felix turned to face her and graced her with a sour smile.

- And seemingly who are you? Just an ex-girlfriend," he stated dismissively, wanting her to leave.

Clare looked sideways and pressed her lips together, anxious to rid herself of inappropriate feelings so as not to burst into a torrent of insulting words. She guessed that Felix was doing it on purpose. He wanted to tease her, to make her uncomfortable because deep down he was suffering and at any given time causing someone harm helped him feel relief.

- You are right. I'm just an ex-girlfriend. But this ex-girlfriend loved you in the past and until now, knows you better than you know yourself," she declared in a soft voice.

Felix fixed his puzzled eyes on her. This was not the answer he expected. He wanted her to get angry and leave him alone because he was convinced that they were watching him all the time. They had hired people who invisibly performed their duties; they didn't let it be known that they stood out from the rest of the city's residents.

- Clare, when will you finally understand that I don't wish for your company? I think I clearly told you to stay away from me, didn't I? I don't want anything to do with you, damn it! - he yelled, unable to stand her caring gaze any longer. When she looked at him with such a gaze, with those big, pretty eyes he felt like taking her face in his hands and kissing her.

All year he had missed the sight of her pretty face, the beautiful smile he was so jealous of, and the melodious voice with which she caressed his name.

And currently, looking at her didn't make it any easier for him to get rid of this girl from his life forever.

- I told you at the club that I would stop hanging around you and not be an intrusive fly. I intend to keep my word. - At this point she fell silent, as if she had decided to think over the words she wanted to say. - But now I will not allow you to be alone. Not at this time, when you have just lost your mother. I won't take my eyes off you, Felix.

The boy closed his eyelids and put his hand to his face, not knowing how he could get rid of her. Clare was stubborn, and if she decided something, nothing could distract her from the idea. In addition, half of him wanted to have her with him, when the other strongly defended against it to ensure her safety.

- I never loved you," he burnt out unexpectedly, making the girl go pale. She lifted her face and cautiously looked into his eyes as he declared it to her face.

- What," she choked out, feeling a strange chill pass partially through her body.

- I never loved you," he repeated, shrugging his shoulders indifferently. - I latched on to you because my colleagues told me about how easy rich ladies are. They convinced me that they fall in love quickly and can easily be wrapped around your finger. That's precisely what you were. I didn't have to wait long to drag you into bed.

Before she could think it through, she raised her hand and slapped him in the face. Her body was faster than her mind, which was clouded at the moment.

She swept his face with a wounded look as he looked to the side. She hoped he would react in any way, but his expression remained cold. He didn't even speak. He said absolutely nothing.

Her attention was drawn to the bracelet she had given him for his 19th birthday. He was still wearing it.

This brought back her doubts: was what he said really the truth coming straight from the heart?

- If you never loved me then why are you still wearing that damn bracelet! You could have thrown it away or sold it. You would have made a lot of money on it.

- I like to wear precious ornaments," he said, twisting his lips in a mocking smile. - But you know what? - He added, taking it off his wrist. - I'm already bored with it.

He rudely threw it under his feet, closely watching Clare's face. She looked badly nailed, and it made his heart ache. There was a moment when he wanted to retract all those words and apologize to her for being a bastard, but at the final moment he stopped himself from making a mistake. He was doing well, so he had to push her away from him at all costs. Far enough away that it would be best if she just hated him.

Clare burst into tears, crouching by the grave and burying her face in her hands.

He didn't expect to hurt her so easily. His words must have particularly stabbed her in the heart because in a brief moment she completely fell apart.

This sight made Felix unable to stand. He lifted his face to the sky, holding back tears, and when he realized that he couldn't handle it any longer, he turned his back on her and walked away. Wiping his face with a line of his hand, he hastened his step to leave the place as soon as possible and leave her alone. At any moment, he could change his mind, break through and return to her, and he couldn't let that happen.

Clare must have hated him because this was the only way he could keep her safe.

*

The blonde sat in front of the house gate, absent-mindedly staring at a single point. People walking along the sidewalk cast her curious glances, but no one deigned to ask if she needed anything.

She clenched her eyelids from under which tears flowed as she recalled her first meeting with Felix. The words that flowed from his mouth.... The words he spoke directly to her only now made her put it all together.

How could she have believed in him all this time? How could she have loved him all this year since he left her? How could she blindly believe that he had a reason, that's why he left and left her without a word of explanation?

She was an idiot.

He just played with her. He took advantage, and when he got bored, he abandoned her like a used toy and disappeared.

- And I foolishly still imposed on him after he returned. I am such an idiot! - she shouted, hitting her head with her fists. She wanted to expel the lingering anger.

A passing woman looked at Clare as if the woman were insane, to say the least.

That's precisely how the blonde felt, as her body was racked with every emotion. She felt like crying, screaming or preferably hitting someone.

She looked to the side when she noticed that a black car had stopped a few meters away. It was a luxury car, from which a stocky man dressed in an elegant suit got out. He looked around as if searching for the right address, and took a piece of paper out of his pocket to check the writing on it again.

His attention was caught by a blonde woman sitting on the sidewalk. He approached her and, with a smile on his face, asked for help.

- Can you tell me how to get to this address? I think I'm lost," he said, showing her a piece of paper, however she didn't even glance.

- I can't. Keep looking," she replied in a dry tone. - I am not a guide.

- I only asked for help. Can't you be a little nicer and cooperate? - His attitude changed in a short while, and he turned from a smiling man into a bitter grandfather.

- This day sucks, and I won't be pleasant to anyone, so go away.

The man pressed his lips together and was already about to grab her by the collar of her blouse when his attention was caught by the camera in front of the gate.

He forced a smile and in a soft voice spoke to the teenager:

- If you had looked at this piece of paper, you would know what the future holds for you," he announced.

Clare got the impression as if these words were a threat, but she didn't let any fear show and turned it into a sarcastic joke.

- Why, are you a fairy?

The man squinted, as he did not like the arrogant behavior of the girl.

- Maybe not a fairy, but everything I predict actually happens at a later time. This is usually the case when it comes to the painful future, Clare said. - His voice sounded so disturbing that she felt a shiver run along her spine.

She trembled.

Who was this man, and worse: how did he know her name?

The black car drove away, and she followed it with her gaze, trying to remember the license plate, until it disappeared from her sight.

She didn't even notice when Ian approached her. He swept his inquisitive gaze over her figure and face, noticing how blurry she looked today.

- Why are you so pale? Did you get a heavy period? - He tried to be funny, but Clare was not laughing. What else bad could have happened that day? Felix had hurt her enough.

The blonde ignored him and just wanted to enter the house, but the boy wouldn't let her. He grabbed her forearm and turned her to face him.

- What about you? Who was the man you were talking to?

- I don't know," she answered more calmly than usual. - I don't know who he was, but he knew my name.

Ian noticed that Clare was scared. And not only that because sadness overcame all emotions.

- What did this man say to you?

- He stated that I have a painful future ahead of me," she replied and lifted her face to look at the brunet. - And the worst part is that he sounded like he was threatening me.

- Have you seen him before?

She shook her head, being sure that she had never met him before.

- I don't have the faintest idea who he is. After all, I don't have any enemies to fear," she replied anxiously, tightening her lips. And then a thought ran through her head: why am I the one to tell him everything?

She jerked her hand out of his grasp and threw him a distrustful look.

- Why are you asking me about this? You also hate me. You are my enemy, so why do you want to know this!"? - She raised her voice, feeling tears coming to her eyes. - Why does everyone hate me so much? What is wrong with me that people don't like me? - she added in a broken voice.

Ian opened his mouth to say something but became completely speechless. He was unable to croak out a word.

Watching Clare in such a state, something bad was happening to him as well. He couldn't define this state, but he felt sorry for her?

For the iron-fisted Ian, this was beyond comprehension. How could he show compassion for another person, especially a girl he disliked so much!!!?

- You are annoying, that's why people hate you! - he shouted in her face. She looked at him with broken eyes, but said nothing. She looked as if she had taken in these words. - And stop wandering the streets alone because you're getting on people's nerves and someone might eventually bury you in the damn woods!

He typed in the code with which he opened the gate door and pushed her slightly to go inside. When she was on the other side, he slammed the gate and threw her a furtive glance when he noticed that she hadn't moved.

- And what are you waiting for? Not enough excitement? Go home! - he ordered her, with a motion of his hand showing her to go inside; however, the blonde was not going to listen to him.

Waller cursed under his breath and put his hands in the pockets of his jeans. He shook his head and, slightly hunched over, walked away from the gate in time to meet his friends who were waiting for him at the beach.

He wasn't going to bother with that stupid girl any longer.

*

Early autumn, 2016.

Clare was having fun with friends on the beach picking up alcohol from a full-grown friend who took pity on her and bought her drinks. She would give him kisses on the cheek in gratitude, which was one of the main reasons he agreed to get the 17-year-old girl drunk.

The blonde was the soul of the company, so her friends loved spending time with her. Although she had been quarreling with Ian for a long time, that didn't stop the others from treating them equally.

Although at every meeting the girl felt like scratching her former friend's eyes out for what he had done, how despicable he had turned out to be, she bravely endured his company. Quite reluctantly, but she was not going to give up her acquaintances because of him.

At this time of year the evenings were already chilly, but the teenager did not mind, as the alcohol had warmed her up adequately. She sat on the sand as her peers took their seats at a vacant table.

Clare glanced sideways when she felt someone watching her. She looked at the group of boys with interest, but only one of them obviously caught her attention. He was handsome and had something magical about him; in her eyes he shone against the other boys.

When she caught him looking in her direction, he turned his face away and said something to his friend. Then the teenager ignored him and didn't look in his direction again.

- I got the impression that there was a dog sitting by our feet. - She heard Violette's mischievous voice. Most of the people were already drunk, so they snorted with laughter, thinking it was a simple joke. Clare lifted her face and laughed falsely. Both of them had a strong character, and always teased each other. - Someone better watch that mutt because it will fall shortly.

- Be careful that this mutt doesn't bite your leg. - The sender of these words was a boy who charmed Clare. The blonde blinked her eyelids to make sure she was not delusional from drinking a lot of alcohol. But when he reached out his hand to her and helped her up from the sand, she found that it was all really happening. - I'd be happy to take care of this pretty mutt," he announced, then directly addressed Clare. - I think it's time to change the owner, don't you think?

She didn't know if she was just that drunk, but then she decided it was love at first sight.

- I'd love to bite the new owner," she declared in a voice that was slowly turning into gibberish. - I like to bite my lips.

None of the acquaintances were interested in the fact that the girl had left with a stranger because they decided that she had simply gotten into a flirtation. They themselves were already so drunk that they stopped thinking rationally.

Only Ian was aware enough that when he approached the table, he noticed that Clare had left with a stranger. He wanted to follow them and keep an eye on his former friend; however, Violette did not allow him to do so, reading his intentions. She didn't care what would happen to the blonde. It was her decision and since she got so drunk, they could even bury her alive in the sand.

Clare looked over her shoulder and opened her eyes wider when she noticed that Ian had moved behind her, despite Violette's protests. She guessed that he specifically wanted to spoil her evening and take away the chance to meet this handsome boy.

- We have to run away. The Terminator is following us. - She grabbed the newly met boy's hand, and together they ran ahead into the depths of the beach, where there was no one but kissing couples.

When they were far enough away that she made sure Ian wouldn't find her, they plopped down on the sand and, breathing loudly, started laughing.

The longer run helped her sober up a bit, as she herself understood she had overdone it with alcohol.

- Why do I get the impression that if we take care of this, our acquaintance could be quite interesting?

Her chest rose and fell under heavy breathing as she tore her gaze away from the waves of the sea and fixed her laughing eyes on the handsome face of the stranger.

- Tell me your name, and I'll tell you what the future holds.

- I am Felix," he replied, extending his hand to her, and just then came the beginning of their story.