Dreams burn stronger than anything else, but unlike fire, once you let them go out they can't be lit back, right?
That's what they would have you believe, however, that's far from the truth!
Nothing can ever truly put out a dream, not even you can destroy a dream that was already created, that's just how powerful they are, and yet still, abandonment is not beyond these ideas of lingering hope.
For every abandoned dream thousands more come to be, even so, I refuse such a natural course, for I would not be me if I ever let go of any of my dreams.
To guide them, and any dream that comes under me, such was a decision I made. A pure decision.
Never will I ever abandon this path, in a way, I have always seen myself in two roles.
Just like everyone else, I am an Architect Of Dreams making my own, but I do not limit myself to my creations, in the sea of ideas, that unaware of the world around them, will be lost.
So, I took to reigniting any old dreams that fell on my lap, sometimes even saving dreams from ever going out. My second role was the Shepred Of Lost Dreams.
That's why I took to reading, stories contained so many lost dreams that nobody would ever believe, it was like looking into the very soul of the desires, something I will forever cherish with all my heart.
Streaming through a sea of clouds under the blue skies as the orange follows; no other soul in sight, just more and more above and beyond as the vision of pure ecstasy stood right there.
Opened to my eyes, the greatest of the blue opposite to the clouds was just the center of the feeling that began overwhelming me, there was only one thing I could do.
With a smile on my face, I braved the clouds and began surfing through them as if they were the most exciting of waters, rushing and zooming through.
The bumps pushed my every movement, going up, down, left, right, diagonally, and every other angle, and then I could not resist being forced to widen the image of my teeth.
How beautiful! Too marvelous!
Never had I seen a sea of pure dreams that was something I could roam, the fluffiness of this delusion of happiness was something I could not ignore.
Thank you for such a chance, from the bottom of my heart, I shall treasure this experience.
Nothing stopped me as continued to track this neverending sweetness, the warmest of embraces.
Exploring something so new and illusionary as my body wiggled all over, brushing through winds carrying the very essence of this feeling.
I feel liberated!
If I had known such an unrestricted way to exist ever was, nothing short of this would be my demiurge!
Until I reach the sagacious state of mind to reach such a place, I can't call myself heroic, because a real savior can only live here.
The place where all dreams rest, the rising of all the stories, the archive of the rhetorician.
Words do no justice to such a moment, allow me to make it into part of my core, so I can reach it myself.
The tale that will come to be for that will be one for the ages, and along the way, as many as I can, I will retell novels of numerous fantasies resting in the hearts of the world.
Be ready as I will come back, a dreamer of the heart never stops no matter what, there is no meaning to a pesky idea like giving up, despair will never hold a candle to the infinity of stars known as hope!
So heed my warning, I will push everything I can upward to rise, and all your dreams will see the light of day.
Even you who have lost to cynism, doom, cruelty, the harsh world, and any other negatives! No matter how big or small your pain, I care not for that, your ambition too! Deserves to reach this pinnacle of pristine accomplishment.
Worry not through courage, wisdom, tolerance, eloquence, imagination, power, will, hard work, talent, and so much more I will bring you to this world, one where you can and will believe in yourself!
Wake up, but never forget to dream! As your goals no matter what they are a world of their own, a domain only you can see, never allow what is truly yours to be taken, hold on to it, and trash any wall until you can hold it high and look everyone in th eye, especially yourself, smile with true pride as you reached your pinnacle!
The path will be hard, but no pain will be greater than disappointment and shame.
Trust those true to you and your cause, bracing it with a head held high and unshakable persistence, none will stick to criticism forever, know acceptance will come, and until then carry your journey for you.
That's what I always have believed, and will always believe.
No dream deserves abandonment!
These tales rise from various places, even so, every single one contains the essence of at least one of the 14, seven heavenly virtues, and seven deadly sins.
Regardless, my path will never end.
Just as I thought so, my ride of freedom was finally cut short, as expected of heights I did not earn, they are to be taken from me.
Darkness, no nothingness overtook everything like a nightmare consuming the dream, all color faded, and not even the black was left behind, just a void.
The aggressive emptiness pressed me from all sides, as if I was a drawing on a page being crushed, into a paper ball.
Going straight through my heart, I felt a sharp yet unpleasant freezing, while my surroundings eroded into a warm gentle embrace.
So warped, and overwhelming.… so this is the end…
How compelling, I was just reminding myself not to ever stay on the ground once you fall, yet here I am enjoying being down, such a comforting hug.
Fighting and trying would no longer be needed, even then could anyone in my life claim I didn't try?
My best, I always did my best, a mere human trying to get through life, a child of the arts.
Soulless was the response I got, not a single person in my life believed I could accomplish anything, there is no future in your craft…
Such harsh words, cut deep, yet I never stopped, I couldn't stop, and I would have not stopped, it didn't matter that things were hard, that nobody cared, and that working and getting any recognition was near impossible.
If I exist, then I must dream, and if I don't exist, then I must dream myself into reality so, I can keep dreaming, that's who I am.
Yet… I don't feel like getting up… I'm so tired… It will be fine if I just close my eyes for a bit and let myself rest… Just for a while… No one will know.
My eyes slowly closed.
…..
.....
...
...…..
No! I refuse to ever stop, whatever happens, I will rise above it!
Rest can come, but not here, not now. I have yet to earn that!
Wide open once more, my eyes were still blinded by the colorless plane, even so, I had a journey to complete.
Getting up, and pushing against being crushed, I began walking, every movement was weighted as if my existence was put in some sort of high-gravity room.
So painful… it hurts, hurts so much, yet I can't stop... Not now, not ever.
There was nowhere, when, how, what, or all other, except for one.
A why.
It's easy, I'm just a dreamer, so I'm not giving up.
Moving, moving, moving… I walked, with no destination or direction, but it was all I could do, so I kept doing it.
The pain was becoming my day-to-day if that even could be said.
Insanity is defined as doing the same thing and expecting a different result, so in a way, I am insane, because whatever happens, I will keep moving until something anything happens.
There was no idea of where I could be, I guess it's just as weird as the cloudy place, the difference is that I loved that plane, and I loath this one…
Wait… I was moving in the cloudy place… my body is heavy and hard to move here, but I'm sure that if I keep training, I will be able to move just like before, even here!
Yes!
Just then I began my training putting my all to my movements there.
There was no time, no light or anything like that, so I just moved, I kept moving now with my soul put into it, a new dream had emerged, and I would just like I did in the clouds in this pit of emptiness.
Nihility would not be my end far from it, this is but a new beginning!
Time, time, time, time, time, time, time, time, time, time, time, time, time, time, time, time, time, time, time, time, time…
There was no being sure how long it had been, however at some point, I began to run again!
Thank you! Thank you so much!
How great, my smile could not express the grandiose nature of this achievement, it was natural for a person to be able to run, I don't care, it was still a step closer to my ambition and nothing brought me deeper pride.
Running through the heavy feeling of emptiness, was not just a paradox, it was a relief.
Around and around full of energy I could not help but to dance in my movements as I dashed through the place.
How odd it was to not get tired, hungry, or have any other of the natural human needs.
Yet, I was starting to see the dream in the middle of this nightmare and there was nothing more comforting than this hope.
The next step is to jump! After all, I will not be able to surf through this place like the clouds without that feeling of being able to fly, so let us go.
Lingering in pain, I could keep going, it was possible, my dream could be, and I would not stop until I was there.
Charging through it all, feel the burning! Take it in and fuel it even more, push it further beyond.
Even if I could just lay down and let it be carried away, I'm a man of will, may I be weak to others, that matters not, for I see the strength inside.
Not that it was any good, to try and jump is to end up pressured into the ground and made into crumbled paper once more.
The pain! So so much greater, my bones crack, my muscles rip and tear, my brain trembles, my joints dislocated and relocate, while my mind melts away.
Like insects crawling through my insides all these feelings stick to me and refuse to leave until they have fully consumed me.
To be devoured from your very insides, I hate it! Every moment of it! And yet… And yet! It only helps me feel alive! To allow me to feel pain was the greatest mistake, this one feeling will carry me through the whole ordeal!
Throw it all at me! I'm ready to brace through infinity and beyond.
However long it was, I did it, off the ground with it!
Thank you!!!!
Another step was taken! This is nothing!
Do you hear me void?! I will conquer you!
Jumping around like I was the equivalent of a bouncing ball, I could feel it, so close within my grasp, that freedom!
Dashing as I jumped, twirled, flipped, all throughout, most of the time I would fail miserably and fall to my face or any other mishap.
Yet my happiness could not be overstated, I'm going to reach my dream, I know it!
From there it was a matter of me getting fully used to my movements, lighter than ever before I learned to control my body so it would move exactly as told.
Hundreds, thousands, millions of attempts!
I'm not sure, but I know I'll get there.
O dear pain that carried me so far, I thank you, and even you, place of nightmares and emptiness, all you did was make me even more sure that I am a dreamer.
Steps were taken one by one, closer every time, the light at the end of the tunnel finally became apparent, and I reached for it.
… Again?… Why?… I had already overcome this…
In a single moment, as I made the jump to begin surfing, a world of my dreams crumbled right before me, as the gravity increased and I was once again made into a paper ball.
Hahahahaha!
An obstacle! Then so be it! No matter how many times, I will reach the pinnacle of my dreams again!
The pain had intensified, tens, maybe hundreds of times, I could not tell, but to move my body, it was impossible… No, there is no such thing as impossible... I will do it, eventually.
In a state of pure pain, I tried again and again to move, yet it never worked, hours, days, months, years, maybe even decades, there was no saying how long I was there completely still as a ball, unable to move at all.
There was no escape even if I wanted, nothing could be done by me, but think and try my best to move. ANYTHING, even the most minuscule muscle would do.
Once again, no, even worse than before. Only pain told me I was still there, were it not for it, my thoughts would have long collapsed upon themselves.
It imposes on itself, how pretentious of me to assume I am unstoppable…
Yet, here I am with no way out, forced to confront my hubris. How perfect! Thank you for cutting away any way out.
To accept the embrace of rest?! I long forsook that, there is no such thing.
Pushing through, arrogant or not, nothing, not even you will stop me from my ideals! If that's your goal, then let our game play on for eternity, I hope you are entertained!
In unadulterated defiance, I refuse to go down, in time I will make my mark and rise again.
My rambles continued in my mind as I used them and my pain as fuel to keep trying to move my body.
Time was a long-lost concept, but If I had to guess at least a few tens of years passed.
Before my words turned true, it took all I had, however at that time, I was able to slightly move my right foot's pinkie.
Thank you! Very much!
It was as I had believed, I will continue until I have overcome this.
From there it took me what I estimate to be at least a few hundred years before I could stand up once again.
Marvelous, once more my body rose from the ground no longer a paper ball crumpled and forgotten somewhere.
Yet the hellish weight on me was far from gone, once again, I would have to teach my body to move through the weight, and all of it once again.
The process was arduous, and painful, even so, my familiarity with it allowed me to eventually move, run, and jump around.
That was however not even the worst of it, as I had to remaster the movement of my body, which had gone stale from not moving for so long.
Until it was once again time for the moment of truth, all my work, my tenacity, and my willingness to continue drove me here, and I will not allow this to stop me from reaching my dream.
Just as expected, as soon as I was about to start surfing once more, I was reset to zero.
Back to square one unable to move, under pain and pressure that could not be compared to before due to the sheer magnitude of difference from before.
My only senses had long been reduced to touch and pain, there was no sound, no smell, and nothing to see, much less taste.
So I clung to them as my guiding light, and yet, this time, even those were taken away from me, I was nothing but thoughts, how could I ever win if I am completely unaware of anything at all?
There is only one way, my imagination, and hope...
I will cling to the idea of moving around and imagine it having until reality. Is this stupid? Of course, but I would rather drown in stupidity than be defeated here, to let go of any of my dreams, I can wait, and accept that it's a dream for another time, but to abandon it?
That's not who I am, and that's never who I will be.
So from then on, I began trying to move my body with my imagination, since I had no other sense of self aside from my mind.
I've been here for what I counted to be 10 years.
It was an absolute failure so far, and there were many times when I wanted to accept the rest that calls to me, but I refused to do so, this is far from enough to make me waver.
Though some improvements did occur, my ability to visualize things was nigh perfect at this point since it was all I did for this whole time, and I could imagine anything I wanted with complete ease, though only as static images when I tried to conjecture movement, it broke apart.
Being trapped in my mind, I had to make something of it, so I made a room based on my old room, filled with posters, figures, video games, and all types of things connected to fictional media, and art, which I loved.
After that, time continued to pass, and I reached 100 years, I had added movement to the place, and there were changes in the environment over time. It was becoming something akin to a simulation in my mind.
Though even now, I cannot perceive myself in my mind, it was as if I was the camera, which makes sense, not like I could see myself when I had vision, but now it was weirder since I didn't have a body.
Also, the room I created had become a full replica of my old house, it was nice to move around in it and look outside the window, even if the only thing outside was the sky.
Soon before I knew it, 1000 years had passed, and my singular house with the sky outside had become my home city under a proper sky with clouds and the sun.
Still, I was struggling to make any living creatures. Not to mention how tired I felt from doing the same thing over and over for so long.
How could I ever even talk of loneliness, there was nothing to be said, It has been just me for a while now, and all I know is I can't give in, because of my dreams…
Time doubled and 2000 years…
Finally! I made a worm, I completed making a whole country before I got to this point, but I did it.
A worm a measly worm but it could move. That was more than enough.
My perfect 3D mental world was finally growing…
Hahahahaha.…. HAHAHA…..
It never stopped, and 5000 years had gone by, and I had a whole continent full of worms, and not just that, ants, and all other insects I could think of exist and live naturally.
Following that, the 7000-year mark was reached, plants, fungi, and animals of all walks, everything except for a singular human, I could not make a human no matter how hard I tried!!
Hahahaha! Why do I subject myself to such torture?… It would be easy to just rest, accept this is far beyond me, but no... I can't….
10,000 years…
Nothing, nothing, nothing I do matters, I can't… I have the entire earth… the whole planet made, and not a singular human, not one.
It went beyond that, I made all the plants of the solar system, and continued to carve and visualize the galaxy myself… and yet no humans! No, me!
Just end me at this point! Why let me keep going?! So you think I'll give up?! Think again!
It was not long before the 100,000-year mark.
The universe, the whole universe is complete and functioning in my mental world, all of it… and still I fail to make a single human function… Why?! Why?!! WHY?!?!?!
500,000 year mark.
Who am I? What's my name? Why am I here?
It seems I am God because I look below me and I see it all, creation at my fingertips, but it only has other creatures, all of them unlike me…
How strange… Isn't it lonely to have nothing in my image, even though I made it all…
700,000 year mark.
Hahahahaha! Hahahahaha! I finally get it, I get it.… I can't just make them from nothing like everyone else, if they are to be made in my image, they must come from me.
Still… I wonder why I am…
Not minding that, I made the humans. The final product of a finished universe.
1,000,000,000 year mark.
Humans… They have grown so much from being watched, how many of their civilizations already existed and collapsed back into the old ages?…
It's hard to keep count….
Yet, there is deep unfulfillment in me, why?
Just who am I?
Maybe… Life as a human will help me understand myself better, after all, they are my most direct creation… Yes, I will become human.
… 1 billion year… 1 Trillion year… 1…. Unknown…
It was long lost, I have no idea…
WHO AM I?!
Why did I make all this?!
… There is no answer... I am far too lost, I have lived enough, it's time I leave, it's time I end this.
So I rose beyond my creation in search of answers, and I saw the light.
Hahahaha….
In the end, I failed… I completely lost myself… yet, I wasn't taken… why? Is it because I didn't accept the rest yet?
How shallow...
It doesn't matter, it's time to be me again.
The architect of dreams, and he who calls himself the shepherd of lost dreams.
No sense could be made of what came next, my mental creation, my universe became one with me, and I became able to come to my body again.
Through my imagination alive, I was moving, a show of will, I myself did not understand.
Yet I would not stop. I reached for my dream, and even as the forces beyond were there to stop me again, I refused to fall, I refused to stay.
My dance was over.
As I surfed through the emptiness that was my void cage, a feeling that was long lost resurfaced.
Thank you! Thank you so very much!
I was happy to be free.
And I didn't stop, I just kept surfing until I felt something again.
Soon my balance and control were taken away, not by an oppressive force, but instead by warmth, caring warmth, and like a loading screen that just unfroze, all my tiredness took over, and I was finally able to rest, not because I gave in, instead because I didn't.
"Tch! Foolish, you will never be able to tame, so remember, you are doomed to failure. So be ready to see all your precious dreams, not only abandoned but dead."
Those words were the last thing I heard before I was finally asleep.
It was an odd experience, not what I had expected to find when I first died, but I'm not one to give in, not even in the face of death.
After all, a dreamer like me could never afford to give up. The journey will never end until I see my dreams through.