I put my hand on the table.
It was a small table placed in a hotel room to match the assortment, but in front of it was a camera as huge as the table.
The production crew behind the camera began to speak
"Please introduce yourself."
"Yes. Hello. I am TeStar's Park Moondae."
I nodded at the camera. And spoke with a faint smile.
"I am now… I am participating in TeStar's second concert tour."
And I was also involved in making a concert documentary.
This was what I was doing now.
'Actually, they've filmed a lot of concert behind-the-scenes.'
It gave people a sense of familiarity with each idol, and the behind-the-scenes story of the concert was interesting.
However, it was rare to produce a documentary separately. It was encouraging that it was launched in front of the general public rather than treated as a product that only fans could see.
It meant that the production had left a mark on the flow of popular music to the extent that it had popular significance.
'In other words, it's like a symbol of being in a different class.'
For example, VTIC had already released three or four documentaries of their own.
So, everyone acknowledged that this was an act of knocking on the threshold of the heavenly realm.
However, whether everyone liked it was a different matter.
-.. Wouldn't it be uncomfortable? We're going to have a camera attached to us for months.
-Well, I heard that they'd come in properly after consultation.
-Sometimes I worry that the related content won't be interesting because I don t have a very interesting daily life…
-Ah, the experts will take care of editing for you~ You don't have to be funny. It's a documentary, not a variety show! You'll do a great job.
In the end, with the majority and appropriate persuasion, the documentary went into filming. So far there had been no problems.
'It's a little… It seems they're too clingy.'
For example, something like this.
"Which part of the tour is the most uncomfortable?"
"Hmm, maybe like adjusting to jet lag or figuring out the new venue… It is the environmental factor."
"Ah~ I think you can do it. Then, a little bit more… How do you feel?"
"Well, mentally…"
I could feel the desire to film raw things from the production team.
Attempts to reduce the sense of distance from my inner world could be seen with each camera.
After lowering the tension with a simple question, if I gave a refined answer, I would have to slowly turn to reveal my true feelings.
It was different from the entertainment production crew that pursued stimulation.
Of course, this would be enough to give a more 'sincere-sounding' answer.
"I think it's because it's hard to bear that the audience can't fully enjoy the concert due to factors beyond my control."
I paused as I thought briefly, then answered again.
"So I think that's the most sensitive and nerve-wracking thing. The perfection of the concert."
In this way, they would feel satisfied that they had discovered the personality of the respondent.
Sure enough, the crew nodded and moved on to the next question.
"Then, what does the concert mean to TeStar?"
"It's probably best to meet fans up close… …"
Even after that, I think I gave a good answer worthy of a documentary. An edited version would be plausible.
• * *
"Thank you."
The interview lasted about an hour. And it ended with the crew leaving to visit the next batter.
"… …"
I laid down on the bed.
On the contrary, the tour itself was more leisurely than the active period.
Now that we had time, we were given a hotel room during the tour. It was because between concerts, there was quite a long time to rest recklessly to recover physical strength.
"It's quiet."
I closed my eyes. Maybe it was because I had been living among such noisy people for several years, so it was a little awkward.
"… …"
And just before useless thoughts came crashing in…
Suddenly, the production team's question I just heard rang in my head.
-What does a concert mean to you?
Then, there was a scene that came to mind.
The first concert of this tour.
The concert at the Gocheok Dome in Seoul after a long time.
-Waaaaaaa!!
Shouts. Fire. Heat.
And pure concentration.
If this huge psychological lift and overwhelming feeling were the essence of the concert, the donation concert, which was held virtually, could be called just a filming.
Perhaps because it had been so long, I felt the density as if I had gone into some sea.
The air was different.
Concerts were said to be a good source of income for the company, but from the performer's point of view, there was no transcendental space.
If we did it right, there were more rewards than burdens. And this group had been around for such a long time.
"Hoo."
… It was fortunate that the documentary crew didn't stick around from Seoul.
'Because everyone went home while writhing.'
We would never have been able to do an interview like that.
-Have a blue dream like the day!! Keuhub!
The guys who sang our debut song with their arms around each other's shoulders in the dorm were drunken themselves. It was obvious that complaints would have come in if the soundproofing was not good.
'Ryu Chungwoo cut the request well.'
I briefly acknowledged the leader's credit. And while checking the schedule for the next W live, I fell asleep right away.
… Remembering that there were 34 hours left until the next concert.
'Soon.'
Since it was in the US, the venue was smaller than in Korea, but the concert had not changed. There would be a similar density of pleasure.
And the concert started again after the time and rehearsal of staying in the hotel.
[Hello, LA!]
[Wooooow!]
Yes. The concert was still a special experience, and I enjoyed it.
However, I needed to further revise my impression of the documentary crew.
'These guys are too much.'
"Moondae-ssi, are you okay?"
"… I'm okay."
I took off my oxygen respirator and stood up. Then, the camera hurriedly followed me, and another production crew member hurriedly wrote something behind it.
It wasn't very meaningful.
'Are they trying to make a story?'
However, it would be faster to find an idol who didn't use a respirator, so if they paid attention to 'passion' with this, they'd only get boring pictures.
'VTIC has already wrung everything out.'
But after the concert, I caught up on the situation in a restarted interview.
"Moondae-ssi, are you feeling any aftereffects from the car accident?"
"…? The car accident… Mmm, no. I am well."
They started asking about my physical condition.
'Ah, I see.'
It seemed like they wanted to hold on to the concept of 'a perfectionist idol who does his best even though his body hurts'.
It was fun to put in a narrative rather than dry facts just in a documentary, so it was a good attempt, but…
'It's a scam.'
I was a completely cured man by modern medical standards.
There were a lot of violent movements in this album, so 1 even stretched my muscles, so it was deceiving to go that way.
I was strong beyond measure.
'It's at the level where I'd have to use a lie detector.'
The bottom line was to get an interview about 'anxiety after a car accident'. I added a bit more assertiveness.
"I was greedy to quickly show my fans a good image for causing concern, but I am completely healthy now."
Then, a subtle silence passed between the production crew.
What was this?
"Um, Moondae-ssi. It seemed like you were moving beyond your limit during the concert."
"… Me?"
Were they watching a different concert?
"Yes. Same with the oxygen mask. The other members said so too."
"The members?"
What were they talking about?
In the meantime, these bastards were holding me in a panic and having a good time. Was it that much fun?
"Since the accident, we can see that Moondae-ssi is having a harder time than before, so they said they're heartbroken because he can't perform the same as before."
"… …"
In an instant, the evidence passed through my head.
-You… You're already in a state of low stamina due to the aftereffects.
-You were seriously injured, and lying down for too long must have affected your condition.
"They think you're feeling burdened physically, so they want you to lean on them more."
No, the corner I leaned on was Bacchus.
And even without it, I was fine now, but the members were comparing me to now, remembering the days when I was constantly receiving help from 'Bacchus'.
In fact, I forgot that I had unrealistically good stamina before that.
And contrary to my promise, I put 'Mission Constitution' in the vacancy of 'Bacchus' and put an end to the heyday of physical strength that couldn't be returned…
In addition, the system was gone and I could no longer draw for more skills.
'It's ruined.'
It was checkmate.
I held back my thoughts and barely opened my mouth.
"… I didn't expect the members to say that."
I didn't laugh because I wasn't impressed.
But I had to use that misunderstanding.
I paused for a moment, then answered slowly.
"I was hurt the most. So the members put a lot of thought into it. I think it's coming from a similar context this time… I'm thankful."
… Half-heartedly, too.
So they should give up on talking about friendship stories between the members and give up on stories about overcoming injuries.
But these guys didn't give up.
"Here!"
"Moo-Moondae, are you okay?"
"… Yes."
'Ha…'
First of all, they persistently filmed me backstage. In particular, it was clearly intentional that they were recording clips of me breathing heavily or getting support.
'They're really into it.'
I thought about giving a serious warning a few times, but gave up.
'Do whatever you want.'
Looking at it, I thought it would be interesting to pick the documentary itself based on facts because it captured the interesting points well.
It just seemed like it would inadvertently plant a distorted fantasy about me in the public, but… Alright, then.
'The fighting spirit of an injury is a common behind-the-scenes story.'
Yes, it could be that this job originally started with deception and ended with deception… Do it right for the money.
'It looks like rumors of the aftereffects from the members are going to spread all over the world…'
I gave up everything and focused on the concert.
However, it seemed that there were also those who did not.
"Stop! Stop!"
"… !"
It was during the slightly longer VCR playing time before the encore. Suddenly, a loud noise came from backstage.
It was the voice of the one who was the least sensitive among all of us.
"Eugene?"
"Is that Cha Eugene?"
The guys who were on standby after changing their costumes ran there at once, shocked by the unexpected situation.
They were like that because the cameras were chasing them, but anyway, the contract even included the disposal of the film in the clause.
'Checking the situation comes first.'
And when I turned around the hallway, I saw the place where the sound came from.
It was a small backstage room, mainly for managing muscle cramps and joint pain.
Cha Eugene had a patch on his shoulder to see if he was receiving emergency care, but there was something more urgent than that.
It was because Cha Eugene was confronting the documentary crew.
"… Eugene?"
Cha Eugene looked back but soon stared straight ahead again.
To be precise, he looked at the production team beyond the cameraman.
"Don't do that. I don't like it."
"Yes, yes. Sorry."
"Get out. Don't come in here."
And resolutely sent the production team out.
"… …Wait a minute."
I also sent the cameraman that followed me outside. It was a bit annoying to film a closed door until the end, but Cha Eugene came first.
As soon as Ryu Chungwoo confirmed that the door was closed, he turned off the microphone and spoke to Cha Eugene.
"Eugene. There are cameras. If you have something to say, it won't be too late to say it after the concert is over and the cameras are turned off."
"… …"
"Even if there are complaints, let's talk about it after the concert. There are four minutes until our encore… No. There are only three minutes left."
"… Okay. Alright."
Cha Eugene didn't look very happy, but he nodded.
He wasn't a guy who was in a bad mood on stage, so the encore would be fine.
'I heard that documentary guys were overdoing it.'
Still, I didn't know that Cha Eugene would do this.
I didn't know what the hell made him react like this. Still, the production team seemed to keep the line.
I held my breath and opened the door. Immediately, the camera popped up.
… I was a little annoyed this time. The passion may have been the cause.
'I'll have to talk to him as soon as it's over.'
But before the concert was over, I was in a state of panic again.