Sitting in one of her core class's comfortable, cushiony chairs, Yurina should have been focused. The lecture, something about early civilizations or trade routes, drifted in and out of her mind, blending with the monotonous voice of the professor. It wasn't that she didn't care; she usually prided herself on being an attentive student. But today, her thoughts kept wandering, constantly drawn back to that night a few days ago.
The memory hit her at the strangest times—like now, in the middle of a history lecture. Instead of focusing on the complexities of ancient world history, Yurina's mind replayed the heated moments with Daiya, Shigeru, and Wataru. The memory of their touches, their laughter, the way they looked at her with intensity—like they were going to consume her—sent a shiver down her spine. Her gaze wandered to the large window beside her, watching the sunlight stream through it. The warmth outside felt distant, nothing like the suffocating heat of their bodies pressed against hers.
She bit her lip, trying to push the thoughts away. But the feeling of Shigeru's hands, Daiya's teasing voice, Wataru's rough grip—it stayed with her.
"Miss Hibino?" The sharp call of her name broke through her thoughts, snapping her back to the present. She blinked, shaking her head to clear the fog. The professor, an average-height man with glasses perched low on his nose, was standing at the front of the class, his eyes narrowing on her.
"Y-Yes?" she stammered, trying to sound composed, but her heart still pounded from the memories that had just flashed through her mind.
"If you're going to stare out the window, you might as well put that brain of yours to use," he said dryly, a faint condescension in his tone. "You're here on a scholarship, so I assume you're brighter than most other students. Why don't you answer the question I just posed?"
Yurina felt the weight of her classmates' stares. The rich, privileged ones who had never had to worry about scholarships or academic performance watched her with skepticism. They were waiting for her to stumble, to show them she didn't belong in the elite school they assumed she didn't deserve.
Clearing her throat, Yurina tried to recall the last thing the professor had been talking about. Something about ancient trade routes? No… empires. Then it clicked. "You were asking about the reasons behind the fall of the Roman Empire, right?"
The professor nodded, arms crossed. "Yes, and what do you think was the most significant factor?"
Yurina sat up straighter, determination filling her. "There were several contributing factors, but one of the most significant was the empire's overexpansion and military overspending. They tried to cover too much territory, which stretched their resources thin. This left them vulnerable to external threats, particularly from Germanic tribes, and created internal governance issues. Combined with increasing economic instability and a shift in political power, it all culminated in their eventual collapse."
The room fell silent momentarily, and the professor's gaze remained fixed on her. After a beat, he nodded, his expression unreadable. "Correct."
She could hear the subtle murmurs from a few students nearby. Some of them shot her side-eye glances—those who had probably never cracked open a history book. They coasted on their family's wealth or connections, but Yurina wasn't like them. She was here because she had earned it; moments like this reminded her.
When the professor dismissed the class, Yurina was out of her seat. The stares and whispers were too much, and she didn't want to hang around to deal with them. She was still mentally sorting through the whirlwind of thoughts about that night with Shigeru, Daiya, and Wataru.
She rushed down the hallway, eager to get some fresh air and clear her head. With no more classes for the rest of the day, she wandered aimlessly across campus. The vastness of it swallowed her, and the bustling students in groups laughed or studied together, but she felt alone.
Eventually, she found herself back at her dorm. With no plans and no one to spend time with, Yurina threw herself onto her bed with a groan of frustration. Boredom crept in quickly, tugging at her eyelids, and before she knew it, she had drifted off to sleep. The escape felt like a brief relief from the chaos inside her mind.
Sometime later, she felt a shift—someone hovering over her. The sensation pulled her from the depths of her sleep. Her body felt heavy, stuck in the liminal space between dreams and reality. Hot breath brushed her ear, sending a shiver down her spine, and a whisper followed—low, smooth, unmistakably masculine.
"Wake up, sweetheart."
It took Yurina a moment to process the voice. Her eyelids fluttered open, and as her vision adjusted, she saw a blurry figure above her. "S-Shigeru?" she mumbled, still groggy from her sleep.
Shigeru leaned back slightly, but not enough to create any actual distance between them. "You seen Serena around?"
Yurina blinked, trying to shake off the thoughts swirling in her head. "Uh... no. I haven't seen her since this morning."
Shigeru shrugged, seemingly unfazed. "Oh. Alright then."
Yurina tugged the blanket up to her chest, instinctively hiding beneath it as if it would shield her from the weight of Shigeru's gaze. Yurina wasn't even sure why she was so flustered—well, she knew exactly why—but she wasn't about to let him see that. Shigeru glanced at her, then turned as though he was about to leave, but something stopped him. Instead, he sat back down on the edge of her bed, his casual demeanor entirely at odds with the tension building inside her.
"What's up with you? Why are you acting all nervous?"
"I-I'm not nervous," she muttered, trying to play it cool, but her voice cracked enough to betray her. "I... I'm just tired. Didn't sleep well last night. You know, school stress."
"Right," Shigeru chuckled, a smirk tugging at his lips. He leaned back casually, making himself at home on her bed as though it was the most normal thing in the world. Meanwhile, Yurina sat there, heart pounding, clutching the blanket like it was her only lifeline.
And then it hit her—why were they both pretending this was normal? Before that night, he was just another face on campus, someone she'd never interacted with. But now, here he was, casually lounging in her dorm like nothing had happened between them.
Yurina couldn't help but wonder if this was all some kind of game to him. Maybe he was just trying to get into her pants again, playing the long con. After all, she hadn't built any meaningful connection with him. No, she'd made a terrible decision that night and was now stuck with the aftermath.
God, I really messed up, she thought, mentally cursing herself for letting it happen. But Shigeru, sensing her discomfort, wasn't about to let the silence stretch on for long.
"Look, we fucked," he said, his voice light and matter-of-fact. "That's way past being friends, don't you think? It's the closest you can get to someone. You might as well stop acting shy. I mean, I literally ate you out."
Yurina's face flushed crimson, a mix of embarrassment and frustration flooding her system. How he said it—so casually and bluntly—made it all the worse. He wasn't wrong—what had happened between them was far beyond any boundary of normality. Still, she couldn't bring herself to just accept it as quickly as he had.
"I—I wasn't acting shy," she stammered, though her voice lacked conviction. "I just—"
"You just what?" he cut in, leaning closer. His voice dropped, taking on a more intimate tone. "You're making it more awkward than it has to be. I'm not expecting anything if that's what you're worried about. No need to overthink it, alright?"
Yurina bit her lip, trying to sort out how she really felt. Shigeru was so calm, so unbothered, while her mind raced, flipping through every possible scenario. Was she supposed to just pretend it hadn't happened? Or was this going to be some weird, undefined thing between them?
"Okay," she mumbled, not wanting to drag things out further. It seemed easier to just roll with it. No point in making things even weirder than they already were.
Shigeru shifted gears, his voice taking on a more casual tone. "So, I heard you're here on a scholarship."
Yurina blinked, momentarily thrown off by the sudden change in subject. "Yeah..." she muttered, still trying to process the last few moments. "How do you know about that?"
"Everyone knows. It's been passed around campus. Apparently, you're some kind of academic prodigy or something." Shigeru shrugged like it was no big deal, like Yurina's personal life wasn't suddenly fodder for campus gossip.
Great, Yurina thought, feeling even more uneasy. Of course, people were talking. She already felt like an outsider, coming from a different background than most students. Now, it seemed everyone knew about her scholarship, too. Why can't I just blend in?
"Well... yeah," she sighed, her shoulders slumping slightly. She hated being the center of attention, especially not for something like this.
Sensing her discomfort, Shigeru threw in a compliment, trying to lighten the mood. "Hey, that's pretty badass, you know? You must be pretty smart to get in on a scholarship. Impressive."
The compliment hit its mark, and Yurina couldn't help but feel a little better, even if she wasn't sure if he meant it or if it was just a way to change the subject. She shifted slightly, unsure of how to respond.
"So, what are you going for?" she asked, more out of politeness than curiosity. Someone like Shigeru probably had his whole future laid out already.
"My old man wants me to get into med school," Shigeru said, his tone flat. "He's got some big plan for me to take over his company one day."
Yurina could hear the lack of enthusiasm in his voice, the disinterest that dripped from every word. "Doesn't sound like you're too into that."
Shigeru's eyes flicked back to hers, a smirk pulling at his lips. "You're right. I'm not. But it's not like I've got much of a choice. Family pressure and all that shit. Whatever."
"I'd say that sucks, but honestly, being set for life because of your family connections doesn't sound that bad." Yurina gave him a half-smile, trying to lighten the mood with a joke. It wasn't much, but it worked. The tension between them started to ease.
"Touché," Shigeru said, smirking in return. "Guess I can't complain too much."
The conversation between them shifted into more casual topics—random chatter about classes, dorm life, and the snobbery of the upper-class students. As they talked, Yurina realized that despite not having much in common, Shigeru was surprisingly easy to talk to.
"It's actually kinda nice, you know," Yurina admitted, leaning back against her pillows. "Just talking. I don't really get to do that with many people here."
"What, someone as smart as you doesn't have a crowd following her around all the time?"
Yurina chuckled, shaking her head. "No, not really. I guess I just keep to myself."
For a moment, the conversation lulled into a comfortable silence. Yurina had forgotten what it was like to sit and talk without the pressure of expectations or awkwardness. "So, what's your plan? Is there anything else going on today?"
"Not really," she admitted. "I was just gonna head back to sleep, maybe." Sleep. She had been doing a lot of that lately—escaping from everything. She had been thinking a lot about them, too. How bad was it that she had been fantasizing about that hookup? It felt like something straight out of a cheesy romance novel. And yet, the more she thought about it, the more she understood the appeal.
He tilted his head, a sly grin creeping across his face. "Wanna smoke with me?"
Yurina furrowed her brows, confused for a moment. "Like...cigarettes?"
"Not exactly."
It hit her then. He wasn't talking about cigarettes. He was talking about weed. The knot in her stomach twisted, and uncertainty flooded her mind. After everything that had happened the other night, indulging in anything else felt... complicated. Her recent experiences with substances hadn't exactly been pleasant. "I don't know..." she mumbled, trailing off. "I'm not sure I want to do anymore...stuff. After the other night..."
Shigeru's eyes gleamed with amusement. "You worried I'm gonna fuck you again?" His blunt words made her heart skip a beat, and an odd heat bloomed in her chest before she could stop herself. Why the hell am I getting turned on right now? She quickly tried to regain her composure, but her face was already burning red.
He chuckled, clearly noticing her reaction. "Relax. I'm just messing with you." He leaned back on the bed, crossing his arms behind his head. "But hey, I didn't hear you complaining the other night. Did you not like it?"
Yurina stared at him, taken aback by his audacity. He was just saying whatever he wanted without hesitation. She felt a rush of heat flood her cheeks, shame mixing with something else she couldn't quite name. She quickly stammered out, "No, it wasn't that! I-I mean, it felt good." Too good, she thought, but she kept that part to herself.
In one smooth motion, Shigeru pulled the blanket off her and tugged her on top of him. "So what's the problem, then?" The sudden shift hit her breath as she found herself straddling his hips, her hands resting on his chest. His intense gaze was fixed on her, and his body language sent clear signals that he was only moments away from taking things further.
"I-I..." Yurina stammered, completely lost for words.
Shigeru grinned, clearly amused by her shyness. "Man, you're cute when you get all shy," he said, his hand gently rubbing the small of her back. The warmth of his touch and the closeness between them made her want to lean into him, to close the distance, but she was still too tangled in the chaos of her thoughts. "Don't worry. We don't have to do anything. I just want to smoke. You in?"
Despite the whirlwind of emotions and conflicting thoughts in her mind, it didn't take long for Yurina to cave. She had no classes the next day and no obligations. And Shigeru, with his dark eyes looking up at her that way, was hard to resist. "Okay," she relented, sighing in defeat.
Shigeru smirked at her response, and before she could fully process what was happening, he gave her a light, playful smack on the ass. The unexpected gesture made her yelp, more out of surprise than anything. "Alright, that's the spirit. Now, let's go."
He effortlessly shifted her off him and stood, stretching casually. Yurina, still reeling from the unexpected smack, tried to recover, squeezing her legs together to calm the rush of warmth spreading through her body. God, why was her body betraying her like this?