The Matchmaking Agency, an organization with the sole purpose of tying the hearts of people together. As of currently the agency has three members...
"Have you seen my boxers?"
Gu Feng, age 36, the oldest of the group; looks pathetic when drunk and looks more pathetic when sobber. Black hair, a poorly shaved beard and brown eyes that looks like it's experiencing its third divorce—and mind you, the guy was single since birth. Considered to be the agency's fist, with a record of 57 wins, 17 draws, 3 K.O's and 12, 952 loses.
"You mean the heart patterned ones? Yeah, I saw them get blown off by the wind a while ago."
"Huh?!"
Yu Xian, age 17, the youngest and the only girl on the group; a runaway who's mysteriously loaded. Black hair that's always tied into a ponytail, excuse being—"it gets in the way of the air"—emerald eyes and a face that screams youth. The boss of the agency, with multiple charges such as fraud, embezzlement, forgery, threat and 50+ more crimes that's still being processed by the officials.
Gu Feng quickly strode to where Yu Xian was half sitting and half lying on the couch. Grabbing the other by the collar, Gu Feng began his relentless shaking.
"Why didn't you do anything?!" Gu Feng screeched, glaring furiously at Yu Xian who was busy covering her ears.
"Old man, are you trying to break my eardrums?! Do you wnat me to deduct your pay?!"
"Paaaay??? You still haven't even given me my bonus!"
"Bonuuuuus????? After you got drunk on 24 bottles, and destroyed all their cups, fuck no."
"You corrupt child!"
"Pathetic old man!"
BANG
Before the two could get into another one of their "degradation battle", the door slammed open.
"I got it!"
Jing Yun, age 24, with the birthdate of September 25th, year XXXX—according to Yu Xian's forged identity papers. The newest member of the agency; an amnesic, who after years, still can't remember anything. Black hair, black eyes, a stoic face, and a brain of a toddler—godbless the heavens for giving this man an intimidating face or else he would have been scammed on a daily basis. Known as the agency's right hand man and the officers cause of headache, with multiple complaints such as "my cat got stuck on a tree and this shady man saved him, but now he's stuck on a tree", "a shady man is trying to talk to a crying child on the park, please come here ASAP", "the shady man is trying to break another fight, please come before he gets punched again", and many more, filed in the bottom drawer of the police station with a label that states [Shady Man Allegations].
Jing Yun crouched by the door, panting. His black hair was everywhere, his clothes were crumpled and his face was filled with sweat.
Gu Feng looked at the piece of clothing Jing Yun was clutching. He then looked at Yu Xian who was also staring back at him, before the later could open her mouth, Gu Feng was faster, dropping the other off, earning a small "oof" in return.
"Son of a bi–"
Tuning out Yu Xian's words, Gu Feng approached Jing Yun who was still busy catching his breathe.
With a smile he patted the younger's shoulder. "Good job kid, I know I could count on you."
Stretching his hand, he smiled at Jing Yun. "Now give me back my boxers, I still haven't washed my other ones and that's the only slightly clean one that I have. Walking with it hanging there is quite annoying."
"Ewwwww" He ignores, Yu Xian's voice from the back—really, why did he work for her again?
After a moment, Jing Yun let out a deep breathe, handing Gu Feng his heart patterned, soaked boxe—wait, what?
"Why is it wet?" Gu Feng frowned, feeling the soggy piece of cloth on his hand. His frown deepens when he realizes that his boxers are suprisingly warm and smells like...
Bringing the piece of cloth closer to his face, Gu Feng took a sniff and his frown reached his jaw. "And why does it smell like noodles?"
Jing Yun stayed silent, ignoring Gu Feng's questioning gaze. Yu Xian who was bored lounging on the couch—unfortunately decided to join them.
"C'mon old man don't bully my son. Be grateful that he even went to the trouble of retrieving that shit."
"HEY!"
Of course, Yu Xian ignored Gu Feng's protest, turning to look at Jing Yun instead. "What's wrong Yun Yun? You look like you ran from death or something!"
Yu Xian joked though Jing Yun's face only became paler. "You see...I–"
"COME OUT HERE YOU BASTARDS!!!"
"Huh?"
"What?"
Gu Feng and Yu Xian spoke in unison, their faces morphing into confusion. Gu Feng was the first to react, opening the door to check outside—sure enough they were being surrounded by countless men with red tattoos.
"Who the heck are these fuckers?"
"Red Gorilla Gang, I think." Yu Xian quipped from beside Gu Feng, taking a peak bellow where a bunch of men in black leather jackets and spiky mohawks were surrounding the building.
"Tsk, dumb name for a gang...anyway want to tell us why these gorillas are coming for us, Jing Yun?"
Jing Yun gulped, gripping the handle tighter. Slowly he looked at Gu Feng's "what trouble did you get into this time?" eyes and Yu Xian's amused ones.
Jing Yun sighed. "I was chasing the boxers when it suddenly landed on the Gorilla Gang's dinner–precisely, it landed on their boss's noodles."
Jing Yun swore that he could have heard something crack as he watched Gu Feng ran his hand through his face. Yu Xian was the opposite though, the girl had her cheeks puffed, seemingly trying hold back her laugh.
"OI, GET DOWN HERE! I'LL CHUCK THAT UNDERWEAR OF YOURS INTO YOUR MOUTH!"
"Pfffft–"
Gu Feng sent Yu Xian a glare and the other quickly covered her mouth, shrugging.
"Do you have dirt on them?" Gu Feng asked, earning a smile from Yu Xian. "Of course. I have dirt on everyone."
Hearing this, the older sighed in relie–"but I doubt it'll save us from their wrath though."
"Huh?"
"Look." Gu Feng followed Yu Xian's index finger that was pointing at the mohawk guy who kept screaming at them. "That guy's the boss of them, has an ego of a whale and a stomach of a pig."
Slowly her finger's pointed at the boss's face. "Now you see that punch mark on his face, I doubt my threats would work."
Gu Feng's eyes quickly snapped to where Jing Yun was. "You punched him?!"
"I said sorry but he wouldn't let go of the boxers, so I punched him and made a run for it..." Gu Feng slapped his face.
"YOU BASTARDS ARE YOU DEAF OR SOMETHING?!"
"FINE THEN! BOYS, GO AND CAPTURE THEM!"
While the Gorilla Gang began to ascend, Gu Feng was walking back and forth panicking.
"Fuck, they're already climbing."
"I'll take responsibility and beat them up." Jing Yun proposed, pulling his sleeves up as he began to walk towards the stairs.
Gu Feng quickly snatched him before he can even take a step, grasping the other by the shoulders and shaking him. "You brat! Just stay put, don't make things worse!"
"Eh, I thought you were the most feared fighter in your time old man. Why do you sound so scared?" Yu Xian grinned, her eyes focused on the incoming men.
"No–of course I—wait, why are you calm?"
"Hm?"
Yu Xian raised a brow and Gu Feng narrowed his eyes, Jing Yun who was trying to get out from the later's grasp, failed and just stared at the two.
"What's the plan?" Gu Feng asked, earning a smirk from Yu Xian.
"Follow me." The girl led them to the emergency stairway—which, also had members of the gorilla gang climbing on it. Gu Feng looked at the hollow smile on Yu Xian's face.
"What now?"
Slowly, Yu Xian turned to the other and smiled.
"Let's just jump off and die."
"Ok, you're starting to panic now. I'm not talking to you. Jing Yun."
"Let's climb to the rooftop and jump to the next building."
"You're crazy."
Despite this, the three of them climbed to the rooftop. Gu Feng made quick work to lock the door as Jing Yun looked below the 52 ft building. Beside him, Yu Xian laughed bitterly.
"Damn, if I knew I was going out this way, I should've bankrupt all those gangs and exposed them to the police. How dare they live a happy go lucky life while I die because of some heart patterned boxers. I'll hunt them down once I..."
As Yu Xian continued her long monologue about getting "even", Gu Feng approached Jing Yun who was looking at the nearby building.
"I think I'll be able to jump that."
"I know, what I want to know is whether we live or die when we finally land."
"50/50"
"I'll get your brain checked up if we survive this." Slowly, Jing Yun turned to face Gu Feng. His head tilted as he looked at the other, confused.
"I doubt it'll help regain my memories."
"I'm meant therapy...you know what just forget it."
"OPEN UP YOU BASTARDS!"
"ONCE WE OPEN THE DOOR, WE'LL SKIN YOU ALIVE!"
"RAM IT DOWN!"
"Fuck, we don't have time for this!" In a haste Gu Feng quickly grabbed Yu Xian who was still rambling, he then stood side by side with Jing Yun along the edge of the building.
Jing Yun seeing Gu Feng's hurried gaze gave a nod.
"Let's jump in three..."
SLAM
"There they are! Catch them!"
"Two..."
"I'll make sure they won't even be able to eat a single grain of rice. Oh and those snake bastards still owe me money, I'll be sure to hunt them too, they think they can live debt free, I..."
"One!"
"Fuck!"
The Matchmaking Agency, with a criminal record of 108 crimes that's dropped by the court, a total of 63 gangs under their rule, 21 hitmans trying and failing to kill them, a net worth of $15,726,000.32 and a matchmake of 0.
"Now that I think about it, we've never actually matchmaked a couple..."
"WE'RE FALLING FOR FUCK'S SAKE!"
"Hahahahahaha I'll return, just you wait. JUST YOU WAIT!"
And thus the Matchmaking Agency that has nothing to do with matchmaking, comes to an end.