Sentience; Humanity, Fantasy, and Civilization

🇺🇸Asher_Nadir
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Synopsis

Chapter 1 - Civilized Man

Civilized Man.

The Barbarian treks through a medieval city, body adorned with tribal tattoos, He stands at an imposing 210 centimeters, muscles bulging at the seams, a war axe over his right shoulder, with a slewed buck, dripping blood on his left, a leather satchel by his waist, and a loincloth liberally covering his lower region. 

Slap

Slap 

Slap

The Rhythmic plaps of his sandals echo throughout the crowded streets. 

The eerily silent masses part from the way of the barbarian. 

With a fierce gaze, the barbarian surveys his surroundings,

"Uhg" He resonates with a frustrated sigh 

"Gasp!" The already parted crowd moves even further away from him, pressing themselves amongst the various stalls and buildings. 

Despairing about his circumstances would do no good, all he could do was trudge on. 

A little while later, he arrived at this destination. 

"Good Ev-"

"SHUT IT!" 

Before the barbarian could finish his greeting, he was instantly put down. 

Silently, the Giant outlier placed his game on the stone countertop of a butcher shop.

"How much can I-"

"You stupid barbarian, did I not tell you to keep your mouth shut!"

Despite being interrupted, the barbarian continued

"This much should fetch at least 6 silvers if you butcher up th-" 

"2 silvers." The butcher arrogantly interjected. 

"You know that's not enough" 

"So What? Go find someone else to buy your shit if you can." 

"Sir, you know very well you would make at minimum 24 silvers if you were to process it" 

"tsk"

"Stupid barbarian, So WHAT? Leave then, if you keep loitering around I'm gonna call the guards"

"Fine."

The barbarian heaves a heavy sigh, and accepts the deal.

Making do with his 2 silvers, he finds his way back to the main marketplace and approaches a linen stall. 

"Miss, how much for a cloth shirt about my size" 

"hmm for a big man like you... 5 silvers." 

"Isn't the price 1 silver?" 

"..."

The woman manning the stall sharpens her gaze and sizes up the Barbarian with her eyes.

"You really think you have the grounds to argue?" 

He walks off. 

"fucking barbarians" 

It wasn't always like this, the imposing man was from the north, where his brethren once lived. It only took one devasting winter to destroy his tribe. 

He carried all his worldly belongings with him. A leather satchel, loincloth, war axe, and now, 2 silvers. 

Making his way to a tavern, the people leered at his every move as he sat down. 

A woman walked up to him and asked annoyed "What can I get you" 

"Bread, meat stew, and some alcohol" 

"1 silver" The woman replied 

"That's outrageous, it should only cost 17 coppers." 

"Then leave." 

The barbarian defeatedly surrendered the hard-earned silver and waited for his dinner. 

Bam! 

The woman, coming back with the barbarian's order slammed the tray with his order, sloshing the foamy liquid from the mug all over his chest, and the bowl of stew spilling its contents on the table. 

"thank y-"

before he could speak, she walked away. 

He silently finished his meal and made his way out. 

After a long walk, the barbarian exited the city and reached a grassy meadow. 

Lying down, he stared at the moonlit sky, adorned with scattered lustrous gems 

Unable to afford even a night's stay at an inn, he would sleep with nature. 

Barbarians of the north were notorious for seeking battle, their coming-of-age ceremony was to wrestle a wild beast. 

Indiscriminately slaughtering those who dare oppose them. The Pagans way, the civilized people said. 

Looking at the tapestry of the sky, he wondered what made him so different from "civilized", what it meant to be "Civilized". 

After all, we all share the same view, beneath the heavens and above the earth. 

His elders said their way of life could not persist forever, encouraging him to learn the empire's speech and written language. 

Even so, he was unable to get hired, not even for a mercenary job. 

Nobody would hire a Barbarian. 

He thought it was strange, that someone like him would be perfect for physical work, the body of a barbarian was made for combat. 

No matter how polite he was, how intelligent, how eloquent he was, and how many times he proved his abilities, he was denied. 

Perhaps the reputation of a Barbarian preceded him, 

He thought if he were to have a proper set of clothes that covered his tattoos, a bath at a bathhouse, and cut his hair, he would only be seen as a large imposing man, not a Barbarian. 

He dozed off beneath the glittering night sky. 

.

.

"HES HERE! GATHER NOW!" 

The loud projection of a man in leather armor holding a torch immediately woke him up. 

"S-SHIT! HES UP, SHOOT NOW!"

With haste unbefitting his size, the Barbarian grabbed his war axe and ran towards the direction of a forest. 

Gush

A well-aimed arrow found its mark, sinking its pointed blade deep within the thighs of the barbarian. 

"Gahhh" He grunted. 

But he didn't stop, he ran as fast as he could and entered the forest, each stab sending shocks of pain throughout his body

"DON'T LOSE HIM, WE GOT HIS LEG, HE CAN'T BE THAT FAR!"

The Barbarian managed to scale a tree in the short time he was out of sight. He pulled the arrow out of his thigh and grunted in excruciating pain. 

Throwing the arrow as far away as he could, he could only hope they would be unable to locate him. 

4 people:

1 archer.

1 knight. 

1 scout. 

1 mage. 

"Damn it all" he muttered to himself. 

"Stupid barbarian couldn't have made it that far" The scout holding a torch muttered. 

"If anything YOU are the barbarian, screaming that loud and waking it up" the mage retorted. 

"tsk" 

"Anyways, a Barbarian Heart is worth 5 gold, that much would cover our living expenses for a few years" 

"Stay vigilant" 

The barbarian stood as silent as he could, cupping the blood flowing from his thigh with his hand, preventing even a single drop from potentially making a sound. 

This was a terrible situation to be in. His vitality was slowly draining from him, and sooner or later, he would pass out if he didn't dress his wounds, it was a battle against time. 

 After an agonizingly long minute, the group got frustrated and split up, a fatal mistake. 

"Don't underestimate a barbarian" the knight stated firmly "Their strength rivals even a swarm of bears" 

"Pshh a bleeding bear is no different than a cornered mouse" an Archer replied.

"Regardless, stay vigilant, you don't want me to bring you home to your wife dead"

"right.." 

30 minutes. 

It had been 30 minutes since they had split and were unable to find the barbarian.

The barbarian was waiting to take action, he could easily handle a knight and a scout, but the mage and the archer were a deadly threat. 

Luckily enough, he spotted the mage. 

Alone, she held a magical ball of light, cursing the idiot archer for letting the barbarian slip away. 

She made her way closer to the tree the barbarian was under.

The barbarian started an internal countdown

"5"

"4" 

"Drip" A drip of the barbarian blood fell from his vantage point, as he freed his hand suppressing the blood flow to hold his war axe.

"3"

"snap, shhh" The footsteps of the mage crunched the sticks beneath her foot, as the spring shrubs rustled. 

"2"

The mage shifted around the light spell she cast and intensified it.

Suddenly a reflection caught her eye.

She looked up and looked directly at the barbarians.

The war axe reflected the brilliant light, and the barbarian's eye showed against the intense light, primed to jump and slice through her flesh like it was soft clay.

"1"

The Barbarian leaped with incredible strength from his position, his bleeding wounded opening up even more. 

Midair, the searing pain assaulted the Barbarian, punishing him for daring to use his wounded leg. 

"F-FUCK FIREBA-"

Before the mage could finish her chant, she was incapacitated. 

He did not kill her but hit her square on the skull with the flat side of his enormous axe.

Searching a wasit satchel tied around the mage, he searched around and found 1 crimson-red vial of liquid and 2 blue vials of liquid. 

"Vitality Potion..." Even a low-grade potion would cost 1 gold coin.

"This was made from a barbarian heart" he continued. 

Looking at the potion made from his fallen brethren, he silently mourned and spilled a small bit of the red liquid over his wound. 

Immediately, the wound closed with a sizzle, followed by intense pain. 

"ugh"

He took a single drop orally,

Vitality surged throughout his body. He felt his veins burn, his heart pumping and his muscles dilated. 

About 3/4's of the potion remained. 

He looked at the woman whose skull he crushed.

She was still alive, but barely. 

Grabbing the cheeks of the unconscious woman, he poured a few drops of the potion, and in an instant, her deformed face took back shape, and the bleeding ceased. 

"about half left."

Now that his leg was healed, he had to escape. 

The problem was, that the group had split into a large circular scouting formation, and the sleeping body of the woman would be found soon. 

He made a run for it. 

Luck was not on his side. 

"Found You." He announced as he stood in front of the halted barbarian. 

"OVER! HERE!" The knight bellowed. 

The knight knew he could not beat the barbarian, but he could stall for time. 

The archers and scout heard the command of the knight and immediately rushed to the location of the noise. 

"GET OUT OF MY WAY" The barbarian roared

"Kid, I didn't think my life would lead me to kill a man outside of combat, but I desperately need the money, no offense to your kind." 

Without answering the barbarian rushed at the knight, and swung the enormous axe. 

Raising his shield, the knight blocked the heavy swing. 

He crumpled to his knees, but he held on. 

"Damn you and your monstrous strength" 

Pulling back his axe, the barbarian swung again, this time, with the intent to kill. 

"Clang"

The impact of the axe and should echoed throughout the silent forest, and the knight parried again.

The thick metal of the shield crumpled, as the knight was knocked to the ground. 

He had to kill the knight now, if not, his teammates would heal him with a potion, and it would be extremely dangerous. 

Raising his axe, just as he was about to decapitate the man in a single swing "SHHH" An arrow struck his back, narrowly missing his spinal cord. 

"AGHHHH" he lurched forward in pain. 

This was life or death, he could not spare the knight as he did the mage, he made up his mind. 

He'd never killed a man before, but if he were to go on living, he would have to do it now. 

"W-WAIT!!" 

in one fell swoop, the life of the knight was painlessly ended, his head separated from the torso. 

"NOOOOOO" the scout screamed in anguish 

"YOU FUCKER, I'll KILL YOU" 

"WAIT STOP" The archer screamed at the scout 

Armed with a lightweight spear, and short word, the scout charged blindly at the barbarian.

"Swish" The spear was effortlessly split by the swing of the barbarian axe. 

"STOP YOU'LL KILL YOURSELF" the archer screamed again at the deranged scout.

Crazed, the scout pulled out a sheaved shortsword and engaged the Barbarian.

A loud "Crack" came from the body of the scout as a kick from the Barbarian collapsed his ribcage and sent him flying. 

"Guhuk" The count moaned in pain as blood spurted out from his mouth, his broken ribs had pierced his heart. The countdown to death began. 

He took off his large backpack and desperately searched. For a potion. 

He did not have a potion on him. 

While he had a large carrier backpack, all it contained were herbs for dressing superficial wounds, clothing, food, and necessities.

He had given it to the mage.

"You..." The archer, a good distance away saw what had transpired, and painfully sobbed

"Just.. Just let me go" The barbarian said. 

"How could I? you... you..."

The barbarian pulled out the half-used vitality potion.

"I want to live, don't I have the right? I'm human too..." 

"SHUT UP YOU BEAST."

"YOU KILLED HER, YOU KILLED HER DIDN'T YOU"

"I did not kill the mage, she is merely knocked out"

"YOU THINK I WOULD TRUST A BASTARD LIKE YOU?"

"If you let me go, I will give you this potion."

"Just let me drink some to heal myself, and you can heal your friend over there." The barbarian calmly retorted. 

"I WON'T FORGIVE YOU" The archer screamed

"Lower the bow." 

"F-FINE!"

letting go of the primed arrow, she watched as the Barbarian drank the potion

"AGHHHH" This time the pain was unbearable, and he was brought to his knees. 

He had not externally applied the potion to his wound, and the adrenaline made the dulled sensation of an arrow stuck to his back.

His rapidly repairing flesh grew and mutilated itself over the barbed tip of the lodged arrow. 

The Archer saw her chance quickly primed an arrow, and aimed at the groveling barbarian.

"GO TO HELL" She screamed

"Ping" 

The arrow a hairs length from missing the skull of the barbarian hit the right side of his shoulder. 

"Gugh" 

Another arrow was fired at him 

"Ping" 

He twisted his body to dodge the arrow, but he wasn't fast enough, the arrow finding its mark in his lower back.

'I can't move my legs' 

He thought to himself. 

"Ping" Another arrow hit him, on his back shoulder.

The Barbarian collapsed, unable to use his legs. 

He cured up in a ball, to prevent his vitals from being hit, desperately waiting for pain from the vitality potion to wear off. 

It was in effect, but the barbed arrow tipes dramatically prevented healing. 

The archer stopped firing. 

Advancing quickly, she quickly pulled out a long dagger, planning to finish. 

As she was about to plunge the blade into the head of the barbarian, he suddenly rolled over. 

The pain was indescribable. 

The barbed tips were already painful, but rolling on the flat ground snapped the arrows stuck on his body, and were pushed even deeper as he twisted his body away. 

With great fury, the archer once again went for the head of the barbarian

"GO TO HELL" 

The barbarian rolled against the floor again, pushing the splintered arrows deeper, as blood gushed out like a stream. 

Getting increasingly impatient, the archer got closer and stabbed the barbarian's stomach. 

"Squish"

She stabbed his sides

"Squish"

She stabbed his stomach again. 

Knife in, gash out. 

"DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE"

She stabbed him over and over again until he could no longer move. 

Deliberately avoiding the heart, as a barbarian's heart was worth its weight in gold. 

She stopped moving. 

He was splayed out like a star, and all she could see was red. 

Kneeling over him, she would finish the Job, and go for the head. 

Holding her dagger with both hands, she would deliver the final blow.

"I WILL NEVER FORG-"

"Swish" 

"AHHHHHHH"

As she was about to kill him, the barbarian swung a shortsword with almightly force and severed both her arms to the elbows in one swoop. 

The barbarian had strategically rolled around, feeling around for the shortsword the scout had dropped, while assaulted by the arrows and stabs of the archer. 

Pushing her off, used his remaining strength to sit upright, and slashed at the foot of the woman in shock.

"P-Please, Spare me" She cried desperately

"Y-y-you already k-killed my husband and friend." She sobbed 

"Please Please Please". 

He was also at death's door, so he couldn't waste time, he had to dress his wounds now. 

With no arms and no feet, she couldn't even crawl, all she could do was wriggle around in pain, awaiting her death. 

'Potion, Potion' The barbarian searched around in a panic.

He could feel his life force dwindling by the second. 

Remembering that he had dropped the potion after the archer had shot him, he attempted to get up to go find it, but he could not move his body. 

So he crawled. 

Blood seemed to ooze endlessly out of him, like a soaked sponge. 

The pain dulled, as his sensory abilities declined. 

Suddenly, he stopped. 

'Why am I fighting so hard?'

'My life is so hard, I have no family, no lover, no friends, no children'

'My only asset is my body, yet now, there's no guarantee that I survive, even with the potion'

'I can end it here, I don't have to suffer.'

'...'

'no, not yet'. 

'I want to see the night sky again'

'I must see the beautiful green that is the meadows'

'I must sip the bitter trash that is alcohol'

'I must not forsake those who sacrificed their life for mine'

'I must live.'

'If not for myself, then for those who gave theirs for mine.'

'for those I've slaughtered'

'I must live to atone, to be punished, and to transcend'

'I must live."

So he crawled.

To the body of the decapitated knight. 

He found the potion. 

But some of it had spilled into the soil 

about 1/5 of it remained, lying flat on the ground. 

'That will have to do'

Gruesomely, he managed to prop himself to a sitting position. 

Blood was still flowing. 

He probably lost about 5 liters of blood. 

The snapped arrows were still lodged in him. 

Using the potion now would kill him. 

Slowly, he pulled out the stuck arrows.

"squish"

The flesh squealed, the blood gushed. 

"squish"

'it hurts'

"squish"

It was the kind of pain that disoriented you. 

Unable to even utter a curse, a scream, nor cry. 

"squish

'it's all out.' he thought to himself

he was about to fall from his sitting position, but he caught himself. 

Reaching for the potion, he braced himself. 

"Gulp"

He downed the remaining potion like a shot of alcohol. 

And it hit him. 

It was like a dozen chainsaws simultaneously ripping his body to shreds. 

His heart pumped like a diesel engine.

"Thump Thump Thump Thump"

His ears ringed incessantly.

Beat of his heart jolted his body like a church bell.

The flesh and bone reconstructed, his organs reshaped. 

He felt every second of it. 

Then it stopped. 

It wasn't enough. 

Sure his bones and organs were rebuilt but he was bleeding again. 

Bleeding Intensely. 

The wounds were still open. 

Looking around desperately, he found the potion. 

Not a single drop.

He looked up a the clear starlit sky 

"So this is how I go..." 

He thought again 

He looked at where the potion had fallen and spilled. 

He didn't hesitate. 

The barbarian shoved damp potion-filled dirt into his mouth. 

'I WILL LIVE' he thought.

He shoveled the dirt into his mouth and swallowed.

He felt the effects of the potion. 

Another scoop of dirt entered his mouth. 

"hrrk"

He gagged, but kept it down.

And another. 

And he stopped. 

It took a few minutes for him to heal to a non-lethal state. 

After a while, he got up. 

He was still bleeding, but if he somehow found a way to patch himself up, he would live. 

The salty iron taste of dirt lingered in his mouth. 

He stood up and headed toward the scout's dead body with a stumbling gait. 

"..."

He saw the archer who attempted to end his life. 

She had wriggled her way to the scout who had bled to death, a collapsed lung, and a pierced heart. 

She was hugging the limp body.

Or at least, tried to with the stumps that were her arms. 

Her legs were in no better position. 

Merely a stump at the ankles. 

The Archer died, hugging her dead husband, the scout. 

Remorse? Guilt? Pleasure? Retribution? 

He felt none of it. 

"Are we humans fated to needlessly shed blood?" 

"We all gaze at the same shimmering sky, we drink the syrup of nature, and eat its fruit."

"Under the stars, our conflict has no bearing". 

"Our time is so short, yet we seek to further shorten it." 

"May you find peace." 

.

.

.

The barbarian had plundered the supplies of the deceased party. 

Bandaging his wounds with herbs and cloth from the scouts' giant backpack, he managed to find spare clothing of the knight. Albeit a little small for someone of his stature, it would do. 

Clothing, Shoes, leather armor, hat, camping gear, provisions, medicine...

What he had suffered for months without, simply because people would not sell it to him, he had gotten it. 

'Would I now be perceived as Civilized?' He thought

Now that his tattoos were not visible, perhaps peole judgement of him would change people. 

But he could no longer go back to the previous town, now that he'd murdered 3 people, regardless if it was self-defense. 

The kingdom's knights would investigate and subjugate him. 

So he embarked on a journey to a new city. 

Hoping he could survive in the society of the Civilized

.

.

.

Clean-shaven, fully clothed, wearing shoes, a large travel pack, a few silvers, and a heavy weapon. 

He was no longer a Barbarian, or at least no longer perceived as one. 

He wandered for a long time. 

Until he found a gate with 2 guards plad in iron armour 

He approached 

"Hello, may I inquire where I am" 

"Woah you are a big fella, Welcome to Srigonia City!" a guard replied. 

It was a stark difference from the previous.

"Is there an entrance fee?" 

"Yes, about 10 coppers every entry, but if you can prove your residence in Srigonia, there is no fee."

"Ah," The Barbarian acknolwedged.

"Does Srigonia have any butchers that would buy game?" He added

"Haha, Surely you Jest, what kind of city would not have even a single butcher shop" Another guard chuckled. 

"I see, thank you for the information kind sirs, I will be back at sundown." 

"Will do!" the two replied in unison. 

As the barbarian sauntered off, the two guards chattered on about the enormous man carrying a giant axe and backpack they just saw. 

.

.

"Is it because I'm dressed like a civilized man?"

"Or is it because the people of Srigonia are accepting and friendly?" He wondered aloud. 

He set aside his belongings and went out to hunt. 

.

.

'Huh, today was a good hunt' 

The Barbarian managed to catch an Elk, leisurely carrying the 500-pound beast by casually slinging it on his shoulder. 

Finding where he settled his large backpack, he slung it over his shoulder, alongside his war axe, and made his way to the city. 

He saw the same 2 men a few hours before and approached. 

"Good evening" he said with a gentle smile. 

"I-Incredible, how can you hold up such a massive beast with one arm"

"Could it be? Are you a knight capable of using Schema?" 

"Oh no, I'm simply this strong through relentless training you see" 

"Ahh, I see. Nonetheless, you are incredible!"

"I'm honored" The barbarian replied sincerely. 

"Oh, the fee" He remembered 

"Oh no no, don't worry about that this time" The guard said with a wink

" A Gentlemen's comradery, yes?" 

"Indeed" The barbarian smiled. 

Past the guards, he made his way into a new world. 

He saw the crowds, the floral decorations, the banners, and the marketplace. 

A lively city. 

He made his way through, but the people stopped. 

They stared, and the bustling crowd soon became dead silent. 

They were looking at him. 

'I guess some things can't be changed' The barbarian thought to himself 

He braced himself for the fearful glares, the contempt. But he looked around again. 

The people were not afraid, they were in awe.

Not fearful, but curious.

Not disdain, but admiration.

A little girl and boy ran up to him.

"Mister! Mister!" They shouted in unison 

"How are you so strong? Why is that axe so big? What animal are you carrying" 

"..."

 Shocked, the barbarian let out a gentle laugh

"Haha careful kids, this is an elk. "

"I'm this strong because I listen to my mom and dad"

"Really??" The children exclaimed in unison.

"Oh you two leave the man alone" A mother came and dragged the children along. 

The barbarian continued. He asked for directions, the people gave it with a hearty smile. 

At a local butcher shop, he managed to get 1 gold for his elk. Apparently, Nobles enjoyed Elk for its tender, sweet, beef-like taste. 

At a diner, he was served extra portions for the price of one, the server proclaimed "A big handsome man like you must eat a lot"

Went to a local inn, and managed to a room fit for his size for only 2 silvers a week. 

For the first time in his entire life, he was able to take a warm bath, talk to strangers without them scorning, or fearing him, eat a decent meal, and even sleep indoors. 

And he wondered. 

'Only after I've killed a man, have I begun to live like a "man".'