Chereads / Shadow Bug / Chapter 40 - Hard To Accept

Chapter 40 - Hard To Accept

Isaiah sat alone in the training ground, his thoughts consumed by memories of Joshua Egoshin's destruction of his family. The weight of those thoughts was so heavy that he didn't notice Ervin approaching until he stood behind him.

Ervin: (interrupting Isaiah's thoughts) Didn't I tell you to stop carrying hate and revenge in your heart?

Isaiah: (annoyed that Ervin was there) I don't need to hear how you understand what I'm feeling right now. Not from you.

Ervin:(grins) Well, sucks to be you, because I'm still gonna say it anyway.

Isaiah: (cartoonish face) HUH!? Go Away!!

Ervin:(sitting down beside him) Let me ask you something. Why did you want to kill Joshua Egoshin?

Isaiah: (confused) Huh? Why do you need to ask that? You already know that.

Ervin: Yeah I know the reason. But I want to hear it from YOU.

Isaiah's mind flashed with the image of his family, slaughtered, their faces forever seared into his memory.

Isaiah: (clenching his fists, voice low with rage) I wanted to kill Joshua because he took everything from me. He slaughtered my family like they were nothing. I trained for years—every day, pushing myself so I could be strong enough to make him pay for what he did. But now… he's already dead. (He slams his fist into the ground next to him.) DAMN IT!

Ervin: (sighs deeply) I know this is hard. But I've been there, Isaiah. I lost my brother, Kenji's father, back in 2003. Eldon Snyder attacked the Shadow Society, wiped out so many people, including Kenji's dad. You probably know the story. But even with all the power I have, I didn't go after him. Do you know why?

Isaiah: How should I know?

Ervin: (serious) Because revenge doesn't solve anything. I didn't let hatred consume me. I could've used my strength to get revenge, but instead, I worked to break the cycle of hate that's been going on for centuries. I used my position as the head of the Hashido clan to end the bloodshed, not contribute to it. If you think killing Joshua would bring you peace, you're dead wrong.

Isaiah: (clenches his fists) What are you trying to say to me right now?

Ervin: (calmly) Isaiah, you've trained for years to kill Joshua, building all that strength, pouring all your hate into it. But now that he's dead… what do you do with all that power and anger? You've been running toward a goal that no longer exists.

Isaiah fell silent, his fists trembling. The frustration bubbled up, but Ervin's words cut deeper than he wanted to admit. He had worked so hard, every day, thinking that revenge would be his salvation. And now that Joshua was gone, the purpose he had built his life around felt… meaningless.

Ervin: ((noticing Isaiah's silence, continues) You have potential, Isaiah. Massive potential. But if you continue channeling it toward hatred, it'll destroy you. What will you do with all that strength now that the reason for it is gone?

Isaiah: (to himself) What do I intend to do? I've spent so long building myself up to reach his level, filled with hatred and a desire for revenge. Now that Joshua Egoshin is gone, that hatred has nowhere to go. It's like I've been running towards a finish line that no longer exists. (clenches his fists)

Ervin stood up, preparing to leave.

Ervin: (pauses) I'll leave that for you to decide on. I don't need to hear your answer. But I'll tell you this, whatever answer you come up with, don't let it hinder you from growing because It can come back and bite you in the worst way possible.

Ervin walked off, leaving Isaiah to grapple with his emotions. A moment later, Ervin saw Kato, Mira, and Kenji approach, all clearly concerned about Isaiah.

Ervin: Oh it's you guys.

Mira: How is he, Dad?

Ervin: Angry. Frustrated. He didn't get to kill Joshua.

Kato: Is he going to be okay?

Ervin: He'll be fine once he works through it. But for now, let's give him space.

Kenji: (nods his head)

Ervin: Besides, I have to tell you something important Kato.

Kato: (points at himself) Me?

Ervin: Remember when I said the Kaimi Daja were after you because of the god eye? Well, it's worse than we thought. They're targeting all the Heirs, including me and you. From what we saw on the news, that's what happened to Joshua. If we cross paths with them, we could be next.

Kato: (shocked) For real?

Ervin: For real. So now we have targets on our backs.

Kato: (concerned face) What should I do?

Ervin:Stay vigilant. Watch your back, Kato. They could come after anyone. I won't stop you from visiting your mom in the hospital, but just… be careful.

Kato: (nodding, but trying to hide his worry) I'll be careful Mr Ervin.

Ervin: (cartoonish face) Attaboy!!! (to Mira) Also Mira you are gonna help Kato with his shadow rush technique so he doesnt hurt himself every time he uses it.

Mira: (surprised and happy) Got it! You can count on me

Kato: You seem a little too excited about this.

Kenji: (muttering to himself) You still don't get it, do you?

Meanwhile, at the HFA, Karla had told Jason everything she knew about the Kaimi Daja, including the identity of Zero. But they refused to reveal the location of their hideout. Karla, Annie, and Veto were taken to prison beneath the HFA headquarters. Soon after, Joshua's body was brought in, confirming his death. Seeing Joshua's lifeless body stirred memories in Jason—memories of when his father was eaten alive by a shadow monster.

Two days later, October 7th 2021.

The funeral of Joshua Egoshin was held in his hometown, Tarma, located in State B. The air was heavy with sorrow as everyone dressed in black, their faces somber. The pastor spoke briefly, but no one else said a word; the loss of Joshua was still too fresh.

Jason found it hard to accept that Joshua was truly gone. As he watched Joshua's coffin being lowered into the ground, he recalled the conversation they had just days before…

"I want to change the world and stop them from killing shadows who haven't committed any crimes. I want to change the HFA. I want to change the way the world views shadows and most importantly, I want to live my life without anyone telling me what to do. I want to end this cycle of hatred that has been going on for the past 500 years."

Jason had not come alone. He also came with Haruto, Marlo, Lisa and Koichi who were also saddened by the loss of their friend. As Jason watched them bury Joshua's coffin he suddenly remembered what Joshua had said about reincarnation.

"You know I've always wished that I could be reborn as a normal human. No powers and no big responsibilities on my shoulders. Reincarnation sounds like something out of a fairytale movie."

Jason: (to himself) I hope you get reincarnated into a world where there isn't any war or conflict and you can live in peace. I know you'd probably expect me to carry out your dream for you….but I can't. Ever since your body was brought in and I saw those thorns that were in Sanito's body, I got that same feeling I had when I watched my father get eaten by a shadow monster. I know I said I'd be able to help but, I can't do it. I can't bring myself to carry on your dream. I'm really sorry Joshua.

As Jason stood there, Haruto came up beside him, his own grief evident.

Haruto: How are you holding up?

Jason: I'm barely hanging in there. You?

Haruto: Empty. We've lost too many people—Aiden, John, Alex, Sasaki, Maya, Derrick, Dax, Sanito... and now Joshua. It makes you numb, you know? Like there's nothing left..

Jason: I totally get that feeling.

Haruto: I think this is the first time we've agreed on something.

Jason: Don't get used to it.

Just then, it began to rain, and the group scattered to seek shelter. Marlo called out to them, urging them to head back.

Marlo: Hey, we should start heading back

Haruto: (taps Jason's shoulder) You coming?

Jason: Yeah. Let's go.

As they walked away, Jason glanced back at Joshua's grave, only to notice a young boy standing near it—someone who looked strikingly like Joshua. For a moment, Jason thought he was seeing a ghost. But he quickly shook it off and turned back to his friends, trying to push the unsettling thought out of his mind.