Five days, five God-awful days.
No phone calls, no text messages, no visits, zip!
It was as if the weekend we spent together didn't happen. I wanted to call him but I didn't have his number.
I wanted to asked Marc, or even Lloyd but they might get suspicious.
Why wouldn't they? I attacked the guy before.
But if they did, I wasn't ready to tell them about us. Well, there was no us by the way things were going. Obviously, it was just a one-night stand for him or in this case, a two-nights stand.
I missed him and just like before, I couldn't hide it.
Sometimes, I remembered his lovemaking even when I was in the middle of teaching my students. Twice, at the faculty room I soaked my panties when I recalled how he sucked me there and taught me how to finger-fucked myself.
At home, when I was alone in bed was the worst. For there, I remembered vividly like it was just yesterday how he turned me into a complete woman. That guy went into my system both neuro and cardio.
I couldn't stop thinking about him and I knew I was starting to fall in love with him.
Yes, love.
I wouldn't have given my all if I wasn't attracted to him. I could have said no but I didn't. There was a strong physical attraction between us but there was an amorous feeling involved from my part. I could tell.
Maybe it wasn't a full-blown love yet and I never believed in love at first sight.
Hell! The first time we met, I slapped him!
However, looking back, I think I did feel the attraction when I saw him in my bedroom and I started having affections towards him when I witnessed him playing with the stray cat.
That gentle, soft side of him made me fall for him quick.
By the way things were going, I had to let go of those feelings, because he didn't want me. If he did he would have continued dating me, or he would have called me up. He should have come to school but no, he was gone without a trace.
It hurts, it hurts deeply.
I felt like I was used, my body most especially but I admitted, I let him do those things to me with no regrets in my part. Well, I guessed my virginity was fully-paid by the books he donated at school. Those were delivered here four days ago. Guess that means, that was the end of it.
One hello.
Swift goodbye.
I sighed, I didn't want to think about him anymore. I was doing the same thing for five days now.
Five days, imagine that!
I thought I was in love with Lloyd whom I grew up with but I could see now that it was just infatuation, a simple crush from childhood. However, with him, Alex, whom I had no freaking idea whatever it was about him, with just two days of meeting, I fucked him and I fell in love with him right on. I barely knew the guy.
Call me crazy but these feelings are true.
My students left an hour ago and here I was still lurking about. Hoping he might come to visit and asked my student again to summon me.
Well, so much for dreaming.
I got up, gathered my things and left my desk. When I turned off the lights, it felt as if my world darken, too.
School was about to end for summer was getter nearer and I was elated. I planned on staying with my parents for summer vacation. The new house they purchased was near a river with crystal clear water running from four small waterfalls. Mom bought it since Dad was diagnosed of having a weak right lung. Fresh air and mother nature would do him good, she says. I called them up after class and they were so happy to learn I was going to stay with them. I had to get out of town or else I would lose my wits.
I hurried home and started packing. The last time I saw my parents was during 'the wedding'. I hoped mom wouldn't reprimand me infront of dada regarding that incident.
I went to the laundry room and turned on the washer. I needed to wash all my dirty clothes before leaving. I was separating my whites from colored ones when it fell.
Oh my!
I forgot. I took it home with me as a souvenir. His white boxers. Still unwashed but not dirty. I wore it for he tore my underwear.
"You're not going to wear that, are you?", he was tossing and turning and laughing hysterically when he saw me knotting the boxers with its front black laces. I chose the one with a tie.
I pouted. It was his fault I didn't have anything to wear. And besides I wanted a little 'take home', I wish I could take him home with me but this would do.
I sashayed my way to his bathroom and washed my face. I was naked up front. Being with him gave me the kind of boldness I never thought I had.
I was pre-occupied that I didn't hear him following me but I could sense his presence. He gathered me close to him from behind, hugged me and kissed my nape.
"Please stay. I promised I will take you home early tomorrow morning". His nearness started affecting me.
"I-I can't Alex, you know I got class tomorrow. Besides, we woke up at 12, or did you forget?", we were looking at each other at the mirror's reflection. He looked at me intently then sighed.
"Okay, but please promise me you'll be patient."
"Patient for what?", I frowned. He just smiled and kissed me on my nape again. After that we got dressed or rather, he dressed me up with a little caress here and there. We ate late lunch for it was almost 5 P.M. when we finished. Then he drove me home.
He kissed me goodbye, didn't say anything but just stared at me for a long time. Then he drove off. I never thought that would be the last time I was going to see him.
I shook my head.
It's time to face reality Clarissa, it's time to move on.
I need to forget him and those sweet memories, too.
If not today, soon.