I walked down the aisle, and everyone around me beamed with a smile. I felt so giddy and light-headed.
I looked ahead and there he was, Lloyd Durant, the man of my dreams, my soulmate, my bestfriend but... never my lover.
Unfortunately, yes, he was never mine. He wasn't for me, because he didn't love me the way I loved him. That was what he said to me a week ago.
7 days before, my world fell apart. I was heartbroken. And now, here I was, pretending as if everything's fine.
I had to keep a plastered smile on my face because we were surrounded by our families and common friends. The people who all thought we would end up together. I never wanted to attend this wedding but my pride wouldn't let me. He was one of my best friends after all and my love for him was stronger than my pride.
I gently sat on the front pew together with the other bridal entourage. I knew Lloyd was looking at me because I felt his eyes on me but I kept my vision averted. I didn't want him to see my unshed tears. I kept blinking my eyes and faked a wide smile. I knew I looked almost comical smiling like that, wearing my body-hugging, old-rose coloured gown. The gown his soon to be wife chose for me.
That witch!
Suddenly everyone stood up for she, the bride has finally arrived.
Jenna Michaels. Yup, that's her. Jenna, the cheerleader, the muse, popular girl in high school, the one we never thought he'd like, the one he now loves, the one he now adores.
The ceremony became a blur to me. I heard them exchanging their vows but I couldn't hear a thing. My mind was in a limbo, in a blanketed dark aura. My heart was in a deeper, overwhelming pain.
"You may now kiss your bride", the priest declared, then the church was filled with a loud applause and my heart burned with sorrow.
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"Claire!", someone woke me out of my reverie.
Yes, that's me Claire, a pet name used by those who loves me, derived from Clarissa Rebecca Thomas.
I looked up and saw Tara and her boyfriend Marc coming towards my way. Our best friends since highschool.
I smiled at them and said, "Hiya."
She looked at me with sadness in her eyes, it was almost a look of pity so I said...
"Oh, darling please don't be like that, I'm happy for him", I used a fake british accent trying to be funny but I knew what she meant by that look even without saying a word.
"You always do this Claire, it's unfair! I know how you feel, you can't hide it from me", she was almost wailing that Marc hugged her tight on his side.
Oh, how I envy them. Their love is so real.
"Hush babe, you will just make Claire cry the more, can't you see she is trying her best to be strong?"
"I know but he didn't have to be so selfish you know! Argh! Ooh, I hate Lloyd!", Tara declared vehemently.
"Babe calm down, this is his wedding.", Marc chuckled.
"Tara, I'm really fine. If I wasn't here then I'd be dead by now", I giggled, a fake one. I tried to crack a joke but they took it seriously though.
"Don't you dare do or say things like that, Clarissa Rebecca!", her nose almost flared with anger.
My bestfriend, no one could ever fool her.
"Sorry, it was a bad joke but what do you expect me to do, Tar? If I won't show up, Aunt Leoni and Mom would be so devastated, too. I can't let them know how all of these are making me feel."
She squeezed my hand and said "I understand Claire, you are always so brave and strong, I really admire you for that. Anyway, this is a party so come back inside and let's have fun! It's time to parteyyy!", she exaggerated the last word and we laughed.
Marc laughed too, "Oh God, you're terrible!"
"And why is that?", Tara glared at him.
"Oh nothing, you're just too persuasive, isn't she Claire?", Marc winked at me and I knew what that look meant. That he too wanted me to go dance with them and try to forget whatever gloomy setting I was in now.
So I said with a fond smile, "Of course, she is. Always."
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The music got louder and wilder. Hello! This was supposed to be a wedding ceremony but a lot of the visitors were the same age as us.
I'm 26 by the way and still a NBSB (no boyfriend since birth) lady.
Well, you couldn't blame me, I was in love with Lloyd since I was 5 or was it 4? Duh! As if anyone cared, especially Lloyd and his new wife.
Well enough said! My mind ran wild, too. I got drunk and I had the right to be. Even Tara was looking worried. I saw Mom and Dad but they were busy conversing with their peers.
My oh my! Almost all of our neighbors and schoolmates from highschool were here and some other people I wasn't familiar with.
It wasn't my wedding, so of course I didn't know them all!
However, it was a grand wedding! Miss richie rich got married so her Daddy paid much for this eventhough he was with wife number 4 and he couldn't attend his only daughter's wedding.
I knew I was being spiteful with that thought but how could I not be?
Oh really, I wished it was my wedding, my marriage but it wasn't. Oh, there it was again, self-pity.
"I need a drink", I almost shouted those words to Marc and Tara. "Do you care for some?"
"No we're fine, go get one for yourself", then they continued gyrating to the tune of that naughty song. It's almost as if they were having sex on the dancefloor!
Woah! Mr. DJ also wanted the guests to have their honeymoon tonight.
I went to the bar where they were handing over some drinks and told the waiter I wanted some tequila though I never drank that before but I gulped atleast 8 shots of it already since we started partying when suddenly...
"Just give her some water or soda or would you prefer for an iced tea?"
I frowned and turned around then my eyes went wide as marbles.
Who the hell are you?
I heard my drunken self spoke but I said those words loudly enough for him to hear.
"I'm Alex Jude, a wealthy self-made billionaire, handsome, attractive and definitely single. Nice to meet you, Miss...?", his perfect white teeth shone with his smile. He looked like someone who just walked out of a high class magazine.
Suave, debonair, dangerously attractive and definitely not my type!
"I'm sorry but I don't talk to strangers!", I gave him an arch look with my left brow raised then gave him the snob.
He chuckled, then he suddenly pulled me tightly towards him. His strong, muscular chest touched my back. I gasped. His soft baritone voice suddenly was on my right ear.
"I was watching you since you walked down that aisle and I'm glad you weren't his bride or else I would have fired him on the spot."
I spun my head and our faces almost touched.
Though he was almost two feet taller than me, he was a giant of a man compared to my height. He leaned against the counter of the bar with me in his arms.
I was about to give him a scathing remark but he gently caressed my face with the back of his hand.
"You're lovely and just looking at you dancing sexily with your friends there kept me hard like a rock. God, I want to fuck you so bad!", he hissed those words at me as if he was in pain.
I was so shocked. I was never humiliated in all my tender life.
I was a girl scout, a God-fearing woman and a decent lady!
So the next thing I knew I was slapping his God Bless American handsome face!
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"Don't you dare come near me, you perv!", I shouted or... Did I scream those words at him?
People around us gasped then there was a deafening silence. Even the song stopped right at the moment I slapped his face so everyone definitely heard what I said.
I was red in the face and was frantically looking for my parents but luckily my mom and dad weren't around.
Then I saw Tara, Marc, Lloyd and Jenna (that bitch!) scurried towards us.
"What's wrong with you?", Lloyd grabbed my forearms and glared at me like I was a little girl who stole his candies away. I wanted to take his bulging eyes out.
Moron!
"Are you drunk? Shit! That's my boss you just slapped, Clarissa! Now apologize to him!"
"Lloyd, you don't have to make a scene, Claire is just—", Tara started to explain.
"Is just what?! She is acting like a brat!", Lloyd's voice increased in octaves.
"Claire, I know you don't want to be here but please give us some respect. It's our wedding day!", Jenna almost wailed.
She started sobbing. Lloyd let go of me and went to her. He hugged her but was still glaring at me.
My heart cried.
I was the one insulted and now I had to apologize to that arrogant devil in disguise?!
And that bride of a bitch was crying as if I planned of doing this? Embarrassing myself in front of everyone?
The insufferable gorgeous moronic guy looked at me. He gave me a smirk while he rubbed his reddened face and shook his head.
All my hate towards them were consuming me. The alcohol in my system made me a rebel, so all I said, word for word was...
"Fuck-You-All!"
That's the gift they deserved for their wedding!
Not the expensive tea cups I wanted to buy for my own house.
I walked out with my head held high and I never felt so much better.
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"Claire, wait!", Tara chased after me with her 4-inches high heels Jimmy Choos.
Take note! Those weren't easy to walk on but with her lithe and slimmer frame she nailed it but never try them if you were plump like me. As always her man, Marc was with her.
"I'm sorry Tara but I won't apologize to them, they deserve it!", I started sobbing. Marc went to me and hugged me.
"Claire, we're not here to take you inside. Tara and I are so proud of you", Marc said with a grin on his face.
"I... I can't believe I did that, Mom will kill me if she'll hear of it... I... I..."
Tara giggled, "Oh, you cry baby your mom was observing from the back together with Aunt Leoni. You know how Aunt Leoni hates Jenna so much for getting in your love life", she referred to Lloyd and I.
"During the commotion, I saw Mrs. Mercado took half of the bottom of the wedding cake," Marc grinned.
Tara and I stared at him.
Tara started laughing and Marc seconded. It was contagious that I started laughing with them.
"You should see the look on Jenna's. She looked like she ate a toad when she saw some of the guests started leaving carrying food take-aways."
Marc clutched his tummy for he was laughing so hard.
Oh, how I love this couple. If only Lloyd chose me...
"Babe, stop it!" Tara smiled at me. "We love you Claire but I think it's better for us to take you home now. You need to rest. I know you're tired. All these ruckus must be exhausting."
I nodded and was about to speak when...
"I'm sorry to interrupt but may I speak with Clarissa?", that arrogant voice introduced us.
I silently groaned and turned around.
Tara was about to give him a piece of her mind but Marc held her hand, squeezed it as if to stop her from speaking.
"Babe, let's give them some privacy. Alex? Claire?", he gave us a nod then he left, taking a buffled Tara with him.
"B-but babe, that guy was... you know him?!"
"Yes I do. Come babe let's go back inside and dance again", then they were gone from my sight.
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Silence...
Silence and again some more silence. I made up my mind I wasn't going to look at his lovely face nor was I going to speak to him.
Enough said! Hmp!
A minute has gone by, then two then three then ten minutes. Still he wouldn't speak up. Well, two could play this game. If he wouldn't talk then I wouldn't either.
It was almost twenty minutes now and I started to get sleepy. The cold night wind blew on my face, it should help me ease my drunkard state but I was slowly losing my consciousness. I tried to stiffle a yawn. I became dizzy and all I wanted to do was go home and lie on my bed. I planned on leaving but the first step I took away from him, I almost fell but he caught me instead.
Wow! Such strong and great biceps he has!
I heard him chuckle and said, "You lose."
Oh my! He knew what I was up to.
I saw his face become a blur slowly then I didn't know what happened next.