XIX. Eat.
. . . . .
As I sat in the silence of the room, my stomach grumbled loudly. But despite the discomfort, I steeled my resolve.
I wrapped my arms around myself, trying to ignore the pangs of emptiness in my belly. It would be easy to give in, to eat the food that Gabriel had brought and regain my strength. But I couldn't— not when it meant compromising my principles.
I'm too prideful to relent just because of hunger. I won't allow myself to succumb to the urge no matter how tempting it gets.
That is not me.
That is not who I am.
I am not that weak.
I am not a weakling.
It has been two days since I started starving myself, throwing the food delivered on the floor each time Gabriel brought it in.
He only gave me a look of concern each time he went in but never uttered a word, clearly afraid I might threaten him again. I could see the hesitation in his eyes as he entered the room, the way he carefully placed the tray on the table without making eye contact.
It was as if he were walking on eggshells around me, and part of me felt a pang of guilt for putting him in that position.
But I quickly pushed that feeling aside. I was fighting for my freedom, and if that meant making others uncomfortable, then so be it.
My hunger gnawed at me like a persistent shadow, but I refused to let it weaken my resolve.
Each time Gabriel entered, his silence spoke volumes.
"Ms. Viviana. . ." He said softly after I flipped my breakfast over, again. His voice barely above a whisper, but he never finished the thought. Instead, he would glance at the mess on the floor and then back at me, concern etched across his face.
"Shut up, Gabriel." I snapped, my voice laced with frustration. "I'm not in the mood for your pleas or pity parties. Fucking leave."
Gabriel stood there, his expression shifting from concern to uncertainty. He opened his mouth as if to speak but quickly closed it again, clearly intimidated by my outburst. ". . ." After moments of consideration, he left the room and made sure to lock the door properly.
. . . . .
Creak.
I heard the door of the room creak open, but I did not bother to turn and look at the person who stepped in, assuming it was Gabriel delivering my food as always.
"Don't bother delivering any meal ever again, Gabriel. You're wasting your time," I called out, my voice sharp and dismissive.
Silence hung in the air for a moment, punctuated only by the sound of my own breathing.
"Lucrezia." I turned to look upon hearing the familiar deep voice of the devil. It was a voice that sent shivers down my spine, a blend of charm and menace that always seemed to linger in the air long after he spoke.
I muttered, "Dakari." feeling the weight of his name on my tongue.
"Lucrezia," he replied smoothly, stepping further into the room with confidence that made my skin crawl. "I see, you're still refusing to eat."
I shot him a glare. "I'm not interested in your games so send me back home. I will continue to starve myself to death if it means I get to return back home."
His eyes narrowed as he began to step forward. "Starving yourself won't make any changes in your situation, darling." he replied coolly. "You won't be able to protect yourself from any danger that will loom over you."
"Danger?" I scoffed. "The only danger I see here is you."
My remark only made him chuckle darkly, the sound echoing in the small room like a sinister melody. "Ah, Lucrezia. . ." he said, shaking his head with a bemused expression. "You really have no idea what you're up against, do you?"
"All I see is a fucking devil." I spat, my words dripping with venom.
Dakari's presence in the room was so suffocating. Can't he just leave already if he's just going to say the same thing all over again?
He chuckled, the sound low and menacing. "A devil, am I? My dear, Lucrezia, you have no idea the depths of darkness that lurk in this world."
I glared at him, refusing to be cowed by his intimidation tactics. "I know enough to see that you're no savior. You're keeping me locked up like a prized possession." He's certainly no different than the devil, and I felt the truth of that statement resonate deep within me.
Dakari's lips curled into a smirk, but there was an edge to it— a darkness that sent chills down my spine. "A prized possession?" he repeated, his voice dripping with sarcasm.
"If not, then, can you prove otherwise?"
"No. . . No." He shook his head while smirking. "I prefer you this way, fearing me. It's not like you're entirely wrong either, I do treasure you."
"You think instilling fear will keep me in line? That it will somehow make me trust you?"
Dakari's smirk widened, and he leaned in slightly, his eyes glinting with a mix of amusement and something twisted. "Trust is a fragile thing, Lucrezia. Fear, on the other hand, is a powerful motivator. It keeps people compliant."
"Compliance born from fear is not loyalty," I shot back, my voice steady despite the tremor of uncertainty beneath it. "It's submission. And I refuse to submit to anyone. Especially not to you."
I could see the flicker of annoyance in Dakari's eyes, but beneath it, there was a hint of respect— or perhaps it was merely a trick of the light.
Was I mistaken?
"Submission. . ." He echoed, the word rolling off his tongue like a caress. "You make it sound so simple, Lucrezia. As if fear and loyalty are mutually exclusive."
I held his gaze, refusing to back down. "They are. Loyalty is earned through trust and respect, not through intimidation and control."
Dakari's expression shifted, the smirk fading as he regarded me with a mix of curiosity and irritation. "Trust and respect?" he repeated, the words dripping with skepticism. "You think I can simply hand those over like a gift?"
"Trust isn't a gift. It's something you build over time." I replied, my voice steady. "But you're too busy playing the role of the captor to even understand something simple as that. You're ignorant and you disgust me to no end."
He took a step closer, his presence overwhelming. "You're not just any captive, Lucrezia. You're special— important. You're going to be my wife and that's why I can't let you go."
The words hung in the air like a thunderclap, and for a moment, I was speechless. "Your wife?" I echoed incredulously, trying to process what he had just said as I scoffed. "We will never marry, and I'm still engaged with Zephyr, Dakari."
The audacity of this man.
He's delusional and it's incredibly disgusting, concerning, and an ick.
His expression shifted, irritation flickering in his eyes. "Zephyr?" he spat, as if the name itself were poison on his tongue. "You think that engagement means anything in this world? It's a mere formality, a distraction."
"Yet, you can't do anything about it. Therefore, I am not your wife but just a mere captive. Stop deluding yourself."
For a moment, he looked as if he were grappling with a storm of emotions, the facade of control slipping just slightly.
With a firm voice, I ordered him, "Return me back to the Viviana manor, Dakari."
His expression portrayed a mixture of surprise and amusement crossing his face. "You think you can just demand that of me? You're not in any position to make such request. You're my captive, Lucrezia. I will not let you go."
Is that so?
Does he think I'll remain here silently? Well he's fucking wrong!
Should've done more research about me to know that I am not one to stay in one place especially knowing I'll be confined.
Father has never been able to suppress me from rebelling? Whose to say I won't plan an escapade.
Ignorant guy.
"Then watch me starve. Become the witness of my death as I rot in this room from hunger." I declared, my voice steady and resolute.
Dakari's expression shifted, a mixture of frustration and concern flickering across his face. "You think starving yourself will accomplish anything?" he asked, his tone incredulous. "You're only hurting yourself."
"Maybe that's the point." I shot back. "If you want to keep me here against my will, then I'll show you the lengths I'm willing to go to reclaim my freedom."
Displeasure was evident on his face. "If you refuse to eat, then I'll force you to eat. You're being unreasonable right now." Dakari said, his voice low and firm, a hint of menace lacing his words.
I felt a shiver run down my spine, but I stood my ground, refusing to let fear dictate my response. "You think you can force me? Stop being delusional. I won't do as you please."
"I will force you." Dakari said, his voice low and unwavering, a dangerous edge creeping into his tone.
I observed how he placed the food tray on top of the bed, the clatter of dishes echoing in the otherwise silent room.
My stomach growled in protest, but I pushed the sensation aside, unwilling to show any sign of weakness.
Now walking my way, Dakari's brows were furrowed together. "You can't ignore your body forever, Lucrezia." he said, his voice low and steady. "You need to eat."
I know.
I know that fact very well, but I can't give in now.
Not after going this far.
I stepped back as he moved closer. "Stay back." I warned, my voice firm.
I hit my back against the wall, feeling the cool surface against my skin as I stared at Dakari with narrowed eyes.
"Come here, Lucrezia."
"Fuck off!" I shot back, my voice laced with defiance.
In an instant, he scooped me up and carried me, his grip firm and unyielding. I squirmed against him. "Put me down!" I demanded, struggling to break free from his hold.
Dakari ignored my protests, his expression resolute as he carried me toward the bed. "You need to eat." he insisted, his tone leaving no room for argument. "I won't let you starve yourself."
I could only pout when he forced me to sit on his lap, the warmth of his body pressing against mine as he held a spoon in one hand, the food tray beside him.
"Open up." Dakari said, his tone firm yet surprisingly gentle as he brought the spoon closer to my lips.
"Absolutely not." I replied, turning my head away in protest. "You can't just force me to eat like this."
Dakari's grip tightened slightly around my waist. "Eat." His voice full of authority.
I shook my head and attempted to get off his lap, the embarrassment of our position washing over me like a wave. This was just. . . straight-up humiliating. It felt like he was feeding a child, and I couldn't stand it.
"Stop squirming," Dakari growled, he tightened his grip around my waist to keep me in place. "You need to eat, Lucrezia."
"Tsk. Annoying. . ." I muttered under my breath. "I'm not a child, Dakari. I can feed myself."
"Clearly not, since you always refuse to eat." He replied, his tone teasing yet serious. He lifted the spoon again, this time with a hint of exasperation. "Just take one bite. That's all I'm asking."
"No."
With a sigh, he held my chin gently yet firmly, forcing me to look at him. Eye to eye.
"Just what are y— ?!" I gasped as he suddenly pressed the spoon against my lips, catching me off guard.
The food barely touched my mouth before I instinctively tried to turn my head away, my cheeks flushing from surprise.
"Just one bite, Lucrezia," Dakari urged, his voice low and steady as he held the spoon in place. "You need to eat something."
I refused profusely by shaking my head and squirming in his lap, desperate to escape the situation. I could hear him sigh, a sound that was both exasperated and resigned, and I had to turn to look at him.
He took a bite of the meal. Which made me perplexed and look at him questioningly. 'Is he hungry?—'
"What are you— mmph?!" I started to say, but my words were abruptly cut off when he leaned forward, his lips crashing against mine in a forceful kiss. His tongue pushing past my lips to force my mouth open.
I gasped in surprise, the taste of the food mingling with the intensity of his kiss. My heart raced as I felt his grip tighten around me, holding me in place as he deepened the kiss.
It was overwhelming, unexpected, and a violation of my boundaries all at once.
When he finally pulled back, I was breathless, my cheeks flushed. "H-how dare y-you!" I exclaimed, my voice shaking with outrage.
He just looked contented after doing that, a smirk playing on his lips as if he had achieved some kind of victory. The sight of his satisfaction only fueled my anger further.
My mind is now a clutter of a mess. 'D-did he just do that to make me have a taste? T-that was absolutely not necessary!. . .' The shock of his kiss replayed in my head, and I felt a mix of confusion, anger, and an undeniable flutter of something else I couldn't quite name.
"I will do it again if you won't take a bite and finish your meal." Dakari said.
"What? You can't be serious!" I exclaimed, my heart racing. "You think threatening me with another kiss will make me comply? That's not how this works!"
He leaned back slightly, an amused smirk creeping onto his face. "I'm not threatening you. I'm just stating the facts. You need to eat, and if that's what it takes to get you to do it, then so be it."
"I-I uh. . ." I quivered and stammered, my resolve wavering under the weight of his intense gaze. "F-fine! I-I'll eat!" I finally relented.
"Good."
I reached for the spoon in his hands as he held the plate in his left hand. "Let me do it." I said, my voice steady as I took the utensil from him.
Dakari looked surprised but didn't resist, relinquishing the spoon with a slight nod. "Okay," he said, his tone cautious yet encouraging. "Go ahead."
I dipped the spoon into the food, feeling a mix of nerves and resolve as I brought it to my lips. The flavors burst on my tongue, and I couldn't help but savor the taste. It was surprisingly good, and I found myself taking another bite without hesitation.
'Maybe I was just starved for far too long that I can't get enough of this. . .' I stopped my actions and placed it down upon realizing how pitiful I must've looked before him as I devoured everything. "I think I'm full now. . ."
Dakari looked at me with an arched brow, unconvinced. "Eat it all."
I raised an eyebrow, taken aback by his insistence. "What? I just said I'm full!"
"Just because you're full doesn't mean you shouldn't finish your meal." he replied, his tone firm yet calm. "You need to nourish yourself properly, especially after everything."
I narrowed my eyes and got off his lap with ease when I noticed he was distracted. "I'm not going to eat anymore. I said I'm full."
Dakari looked taken aback, his grip loosening as I slipped away. "What do you mean?" he asked, a hint of confusion in his voice.
I think I made myself clear already.
"I mean exactly what I said." I replied firmly, crossing my arms as I stood before him. "I'm done eating. I'm not going to force myself to consume more than I want."
He studied me for a moment, his expression shifting from surprise to concern. "Lucrezia, you need to keep your strength up. You've barely eaten anything for days."
"And whose fault is that?" I challenged, feeling a surge of frustration. "You're the one who has been trying to force-feed me like a child! You're also the one who kidnapped me!"
"Lucrezia, come here right this instant." Dakari stood up from the bed, his voice echoing with authority that demanded immediate compliance. "You have to finish your meal. Whether you like it or not. You will eat."
"Fuck. Off." I snarled.
"I will keep on kissing you and force you to eat if you won't finish your meal." He threatened me which made me flinch on the spot.
I still have yet forgiven him for kissing me without my consent. Being kissed again by the dare devil is not something I desire and is certainly something I do not want to happen again.
I stepped back towards the bed and hesitantly held the plate and spoon. "F-fine." I said, my voice steady despite the turmoil inside me. "I'll eat. But don't think for a second that this means I'll ever accept your threats."
He only observed and watched me, his gaze unwavering and intense. It felt as if he were scrutinizing every movement I made, analyzing my expressions for any sign of rebellion or reluctance.
Each bite I took was met with his piercing blue eyes, which seemed to bore into me.
The weight of his attention was suffocating, and I could feel the pressure mounting with every spoonful I brought to my lips.
As I chewed slowly, trying to mask my discomfort, I became acutely aware of the silence that enveloped us.
The only sounds were the soft clinking of the utensils against the plate and the rhythmic beating of my heart in my chest. I could sense him leaning against the wall, arms crossed. Just. . . Watching.
When I finally set down the spoon, having finished more than I had intended, he moved with deliberate slowness.
Without saying a word, he gathered the plates and utensils with practiced ease, stacking them neatly on the tray.
Then he turned away and stepped outside, closing the door behind him with a soft click that echoed ominously in the silence.
". . . Damned guy." I can only curse him after he left.