Chereads / My Wife is Unbeatable in the Whole World, Touch Me If You Dare! / Chapter 5 - Chapter 5: Judging Cases in the Public Court

Chapter 5 - Chapter 5: Judging Cases in the Public Court

Although the final judgment did not change, it allowed Li Nuo to understand the rules of the "Law Code."

His remaining lifespan, according to the law code, could be altered.

Speaking solely of imprisonment, within the legally stipulated range, criminals receive one additional day of life for each year they are sentenced.

Li Nuo had asked the Chang'an County Magistrate about other forms of punishment besides imprisonment in Daxia, such as flogging, caning, exile, and the death penalty, and how much lifespan benefit these could bring. However, he did not yet know; firstly, because the sentencing of the female assassin had an upper limit, and secondly, he did not want to overly trouble the honest Chang'an County Magistrate.

However, there was one thing Li Nuo could be certain of.

To increase his lifespan according to the "Law Code," the criminal must be related to him personally, like the female assassin who attacked him. If it worked with any case, wouldn't he achieve eternal youth given how many cases the government adjudicates daily?

Doesn't that mean the more people who attempt to assassinate him, the better?

To want to live, one must exchange life for life...

It's just too tragic. Who, having eaten their fill, would bother to assassinate a fool every day?

The Chang'an County Magistrate worried that if he stayed any longer, he would not be able to resist laying hands on this debauched noble. Of course, he feared angering himself to death even more. After bowing to Li Nuo, he said, "Young Master, I still have cases pending in court, maybe..."

Mentioning the cases sparked an idea in Li Nuo.

He did not know whether cases unrelated to him could increase his lifespan, but could those he adjudicated himself?

Time was of the essence; though he had just gained two more days of life, he only had five days left to live. He needed to seize every opportunity. With that thought, he immediately said to the Chang'an County Magistrate, "Lord Pei, I have an unseemly request. May I preside over this case?"

The Chang'an County Magistrate hesitated, "What? Young Master wants to try a case?"

Li Nuo asked, "May I?"

He had no official title; naturally, he shouldn't preside over a trial.

But his father was the Minister of Justice, and his word was the principle. Who would dare to object?

The Chang'an County Magistrate took a deep breath and said, "Of course, this way please, Young Master…"

Housekeeper Wu, curious, asked Li Nuo, "Young Master, why do you want to try a case?"

Li Nuo only smiled and said, "Just for fun, while I have nothing else to do..."

Housekeeper Wu had no comment; perhaps the young master was merely indulging a whim, but since the young master enjoyed it, he might as well have his fun.

During the trial, the Lord County Magistrate hurriedly left, the government officials on both sides, though curious, dared not speak. As for the two suspects kneeling in the court, even if their knees grew numb, they dared not move.

After a long while, Lord County Magistrate returned, and by his side was a lavishly dressed nobleman.

The Standard Fifth-Rank Chang'an County Magistrate actually yielded the principal seat to this nobleman and was exceedingly respectful toward him, causing a shiver in the hearts of the onlookers, and even their breathing slowed down somewhat.

Li Nuo had already learned that the Chang'an County Magistrate was trying a theft case involving two suspects, and routine questioning was in process.

Li Nuo first looked over the case files. The script of Daxia resembled the traditional characters of later ages. Having frequently studied ancient documents for his theses, Li Nuo had learned many traditional characters. Though there were still some characters he did not recognize, he was able to make educated guesses based on context.

However, his former self was an idiot who couldn't even manage basic addition and subtraction and likely knew very few characters.

Li Nuo handed the case files to the Chang'an County Magistrate, saying, "Lord Pei, there are many words here I cannot read; could you read them for me, please?"

The Chang'an County Magistrate inwardly sneered. Not recognizing a single character and yet wanting to try a case, a whim born out of nowhere without understanding his own limitations—he scoffed internally before smiling and saying, "No trouble at all, this case is actually quite simple. Ms. Wang of Chang'an Street lost several taels of silver and suspects one of her two neighbors..."

Before long, Li Nuo's eyes turned downward.

This was just a typical theft case. Both of Ms. Wang's neighbors were suspects, but there was insufficient evidence to convict either.

Li Nuo thought for a moment and turned to a skinny man with a goatee, asking, "From the moment you got up yesterday, what did you do? List everything in detail, without omission."

The skinny man coughed twice and said, "Sir, I got up at about 9 in the morning that day, started by eating three buns and a bowl of porridge at a roadside shop, then wandered the streets. At about 11:00 a.m., I gambled for a bit at the casino, and around 1:00 p.m., I dined at Xiangman Building, took a nap at home afterward, stepped out at 3:00 p.m., greeted Ms. Wang, went to Fengqi Building for fun..., after having fun, went to a brothel, watched a monkey play, a dancing girl, then drank with friends, and returned home before 9:00 p.m. and went to sleep. Sir, I truly didn't have time to steal anything."

Li Nuo then turned to another plump man.

Before he could speak, the plump man immediately said, "Sir, it's a misunderstanding. I woke up at 5 a.m. and started making pancakes. I went out to sell them before 7 a.m., finished selling by 9 a.m., came back home, fetched water, chopped wood, finished these tasks around a quarter past 11 a.m., greeted Ms. Wang, went back home to cook..., I went out around 7 p.m. to buy rice, ate a bowl of noodles at Liu's Noodle House in the eastern end of the alley, went home after buying the rice, washed clothes, and also took a bath. I had a good time with my wife, starting in the missionary position, then sideways, from below, and lastly from behind..."

The Chang'an County Magistrate subtly adjusted his crotch, interrupting, "Alright, you don't have to be so specific about these matters..."

Ms. Wang's home had been burglarized, losing several taels of silver, and she suspected one of the two neighbors. Hence, he had both summoned to court, but both defendants denied the theft and also had alibis.

Several taels of silver wasn't a small sum for ordinary people, and he, being their parent-like official, naturally had to take it seriously, but he was too lazy to verify each detail. Since the debauched noble wanted to investigate, he just let him go ahead.

He was curious to see whether this debauched noble had the capabilities of his father.

After hearing the two men's testimonies, Li Nuo did not say much, casually chatting with the Chang'an County Magistrate, smiling and asking, "Lord Pei, which part of the country are you originally from?"

The Chang'an County Magistrate paused, then said, "Longnan."

"What a coincidence..."

"You're also from Longnan? I thought you were a native of Chang'an."

"I have a friend whose family is originally from Longnan..., by the way, Lord Pei, how many people are in your family?"

"I have an elderly mother and a wife who has borne me one son."

"Lord Pei, being so handsome, do you really have no concubines at home?"

"Ah, I'd like that, but my wife won't allow it…"

The two chatted casually, seemingly forgetting about the trial. Not to mention the government officials on either side, even the two suspects in the court listened with great interest in the gossip.

As the Chang'an County Magistrate had no idea what Lord Pei was scheming about, Li Nuo suddenly looked down and changed his tone, saying to the overweight man, "You, what did you do that day? Say it backward."

Though the overweight man didn't understand why, he still recounted honestly, "My wife and I had some fun, we used the rear position, lower position, side position, upper position; before that, I bathed, washed clothes, bought rice, ate at Liu's Noodle House..., cooked, chopped wood, carried water, sold cakes, made cakes, and got out of bed..."

Li Nuo nodded slightly.

Although it was slower than before, the details were still correct.

Then his gaze shifted to the thin man with a goatee, saying, "Your turn."

The thin man trembled, "I got out of bed at 9 a.m..."

Li Nuo waved his hand to interrupt him, "I didn't ask you to say it from the start, begin with going to bed last night and say it backward…"

The thin man's forehead started to sweat, "Sleeping, before sleeping I drank with friends, watched monkey shows at the brothel, saw dancing girls, listened to music..."

Li Nuo waved his hand again, "Wait, didn't you just say it was music first, then monkey shows, and dancing girls last? Why is it mixed up now…"

The goateed thin man's body shook, he began to sweat profusely, stammering, "I, I remembered it wrong…"

"Continue."

"Yes, listened to music, listened to music, and before that had a nap at home…"

"Were you not having fun at the Fengqi Building?"

"Oh, I forgot, I forgot, I napped first and then went to the Fengqi Building…"

"What before the nap?"

"I was, I was eating at Xiangman Building, went to the gambling house, before that I was strolling, and before strolling, I ate three steamed buns and a bowl of porridge…"

"Didn't you just say two steamed buns?"

"It was two, two."

"I'm sorry, I remember now, you did say three."

Bang!

Li Nuo, as if back in a courtroom, slammed the gavel and shouted angrily, "The other man remembers clearly even which positions he used with his wife and in what order, yet you can't remember whether you ate two or three steamed buns this morning? Your earlier statement was clearly made up. Speak! Why did you lie? Was it you who stole Ms. Wang's silver!"

The goateed thin man was startled and immediately responded, "Lord, my memory is poor…"

By now, the experienced Chang'an County Magistrate had seen through it all.

"Bad memory, is it…"

There was no need for Li Nuo to ask further. The County Magistrate smiled, waved to the constables on both sides, and said, "Take him away and let him think deeply. I believe he will remember…"

He was reluctant to use torture, not wanting to apply it to the innocent.

It was clear to anyone that this goateed thin man was problematic; now, it was time to properly help him "restore his memory."

Actually, he had been quite annoyed by this fellow just now.

Fengqi Building...What status do you hold that you should be in the same brothel as I visit?

Hearing the Chang'an County Magistrate's words, the thin man with a goatee trembled. Even though he had never experienced the Government's "Great Memory Restoration Technique," he had heard of it from peers—it truly made one wish to be neither alive nor dead. He immediately spoke up, "Lord, I confess, the silver was stolen by me, no need to trouble these constables further!"

"Adjourn!"

After a slam of the gavel, the Chang'an County Magistrate bowed towards Li Nuo and said, "Sir Nuo, your wisdom is beyond me. How did you think of making them recite their testimonials backward?"

Li Nuo smiled, "It's nothing really. If it's something they actually experienced, even if they recount it backward, they generally won't make mistakes. But if it's a story made up on the spot, it's difficult to narrate it backward. Moreover, they were distracted by our conversation, which made it even harder for them to remember…"

Those were just some modern interrogation tricks. Though not a detective himself, Li Nuo often dealt with them and had learned a few tricks.

The Chang'an County Magistrate bowed again, "I've learned a lot…"

While speaking, he couldn't help but take another look at the young man before him.

Rumors indeed cannot be trusted.

Who said the Minister of Justice's son was a fool?

If this is a fool, wouldn't that make Pei Zhe less than a fool?

Outside the courtroom, Housekeeper Wu was stunned, a face full of emotion. When had the word "strategic" ever been used to describe their foolish young master…