It worked out well, but it wasn't all sunshine and rainbows.
'Pity is never a good thing.'
As an actor, it's best to possess a pristine image, similar to a blank slate. Whatever role you're playing, you want people to focus on it.
An actor won't last long if people fail to concentrate on the character they portray and instead sympathize with their actual appearance.
'I survived, of course.'
She played a villain who bullied the protagonist so viciously, she received all kinds of hate from the public, but she still swept all the awards that year.
Anyway, the bottom line is that she perceives a lot of similarities between herself and Camilla, who never truly received affection from her parents and the people around her.
Camilla never received any proper affection from her mother and the same unfortunate fate befell her brother Ravi.
It was even worse when she joined the ducal family. She was completely disregarded by everyone, as if she didn't exist.
'Ah, except...'
The maid Donna.
She has treated Camilla wholeheartedly for a long time. Unbelievably so.
'Except for Donna, they all treated Camilla the same way.'
Aside from her parents, she has never been particularly close to anyone.
She could never bridge the gap beyond a certain distance. Even when she displayed interest in others, she would feel awkward and distance herself from them.
If she hadn't become an actress, she might have led a life not much different from Camilla's.
She probably would've gone insane, thirsting for other people's affection.
'Just like Camilla did.'
Camilla refrained from speaking her thoughts and observed her family.
There was only one thing she wanted.
Affection. The love from her family.
Driven by an insatiable hunger for affection, she willingly carried out Ravi's requests and remained by his side until the very end, despite being presented with food she couldn't eat.
She yearned to be a part of the family and not be abandoned by them.
'Although I was loved by the public as an actress.'
Even if it was just the hollow affection of people who liked what they saw on the outside, it was enough.
But Camilla didn't have anyone.
Is that why? The reason for her continuous support, despite her frustration and irritation, was because of the numerous similarities she saw in Camilla?
She knew all too well the pain of dying at the hands of her family members.
The reason she came here was out of concern for Ravi, whom she thought was alone amongst the rest of the family like she was.
"Hey, what are you thinking?"
"…!"
Momentarily immersed in past memories, Camilla gasped at the sound of Ravi's voice coming from up close.
"What? Why are you so surprised?"
"Ah…"
Ravi stared silently at Camilla for a moment, then turned and walked away, heading for the entrance of the presentation hall.
"Sigh."
Did she come for nothing?
A small sigh escaped Camilla's lips as she watched Ravi turn away from her, his back to her, as always.
It was an expected reaction but for some reason, she feels a little less energized today.
'Can I keep this up?'
Is it possible to do that with such cold-hearted people? She feels like she's becoming more isolated and crazy like Camilla…
"Hey, what are you doing?"
"…?"
After a moment's pause, Camilla's gaze snapped forward to find Ravi, who had walked ahead, looking at her.
"Aren't you coming?"
"…"
"Come on."
Seeing Ravi waiting for her, Camilla was speechless for a moment.
Soon, a subtle smile formed on her lips as she hastened her steps towards him.
"Brother, you know what?"
"What?"
"Brother's head is prettier on the front than in the back."
"…What are you saying?"
Camilla's laughter grew a little louder as she watched Ravi's bemused expression.
Chapter. Ludville Sorpel
"It's quiet."
The ducal house was so quiet that she wondered if this was where the celebration was held yesterday.
Camilla, who, as she always did, went out to pick out flowers for the Duke of Sorpel's office, noticed a quiet atmosphere that enveloped the house.
'They're trying to give him a good rest.'
Everyone seemed to be considerate of Ludville, who had been away at war for a long time, upon his return. The household is holding their breaths so that he can rest well.
'Surely there won't be any criticism because of what happened yesterday, right?'
Camilla and Ravi didn't get home until late in the evening yesterday.
For some reason, Ravi willingly agreed to return after dinner when she asked him to do so.
'I guess he hated it, too.'
It was evident that he had no desire to join a party where individuals who admired Ludville gathered.
When the two of them, who spent as much time outside as possible, eventually arrived back home, the celebration had winded down to some extent.
Unlike Ravi, who headed to the party area to greet everyone, Camilla went straight to her room.
She gave the butler the excuse that she was too tired to utter a simple greeting.
'I'm not quite ready yet…'
Honestly, she felt extremely anxious about encountering Ludville, the eldest son of the household.
'Because she died the most at his hands.'
Her heart was stabbed, she was decapitated, and— she died at his hands in various ways. It was difficult to count the number of times.
'It was the same for when I first met the Duke of Sorpel.'
The initial meeting with the Duke of Sorpel left her trembling, as she had always been dragged to her death at his behest.
Her fingertips trembled while the relentless thumping of her heart pounded in her ears. The thought of being dragged away by his command loomed over her.
'But at least I can read his expressions.'
The Duke of Sorpel has a rather stoic demeanor, yet his emotions of dislike, love, anger, and fondness were undeniably visible.
But Ludville, that man was completely mysterious.
'I think he's as plain as he looks.'
As for what he looks like…
'Ehh.'
She didn't know.
With a long sigh, Camilla went back to plucking flowers. It seemed impossible to improve her relationship with Ludville.
'I only need to pick one.'
Her life won't be at stake as long as she manages to hold onto the Duke of Sorpel's heart, even if she gives up on Ludville.
'—I'm not going to die, right?'
Ugh.
"Let's just pluck some flowers."
She wonders if it had rained at dawn; the ground was damp.
Camilla let out a frustrated sigh as she glanced back and forth between the slippery ground and the shoes she was wearing.
'Should I develop sneakers and sell them?'
Camilla was currently wearing a pair of heels that were by no means uncomfortable.
They were the lowest heels she'd ever owned, but they were uncomfortable to walk in on the dirt after the rain.
"Ah!"
Eventually, one of Camilla's feet slipped on the rain-soaked dirt as she started walking.
But…
"Whoa!"
It was a piece of cake for her.
Camilla beamed with pride.
She was a popular actress who often walked the runway. Although she was never a global model, she was one of the most prolific actresses in Korea.
'It was a basic requirement to walk in 15cm heels.'
She gracefully walked the stage that was as smooth and slippery as glass, effortlessly conveying her facial expression.
It's a sense of balance; it's a piece of cake.
Camilla, who was grinning as she flicked her hand over her disheveled hair, instinctively glanced towards the peculiar gaze she felt at the moment.
Then she froze.
"…"
Snow-white hair and even more striking blue eyes. A sharp jawline that could cut through paper.
And finally, the expressionlessness that compliments it all so well.
'Damn it.'
Camilla struggled to suppress the profanities that were just on the tip of her tongue. Such a sudden encounter.
She knew they were going to have to come face-to-face, but not this early in the morning!
Standing before Camilla was none other than Ludville.
'But what is he doing?'
For a moment, the tension had Camilla swallowing anxiously, before she shot him a questioning glance.
Ludville's posture was a bit strange.
With a hand and foot extended, it appeared as though he had been sprinting and abruptly stopped…
"…?"
"…"
It was Ludville who broke the brief eye contact and turned to leave without a word.
"E-Elder Brother!"
Camilla urgently called Ludville.
Even if the Duke of Sorpel is planning to send her to her death, there's no need to get into trouble with Ludville.
It's best to stay out of his way and get along with him as much as possible.
Camilla strode toward Ludville, who was looking back at her.
Camilla smiled despite his indifferent stare making her heart sink.
Fwip.
Then, she nestled the flowers she's been holding into his embrace. She felt compelled to give it to him, to relieve the awkward atmosphere.
"It's a welcome gift."
Camilla smiled as brightly as she could.
"…"
She smiled so brightly.
"…"
Very brightly— was that a wrong move?
'What is it? What's wrong? It suits you well.'
After all, men are flowers!
She is dazzled by his beauty and the flowers he's holding. She can't believe her eyes…
She should run away.
'Damn.'
Should she have given him the flowers?
"I-I'll see you later, then."
Camilla gave a curt wave and hurried off.
"…"
Ludville watched Camilla flee, his eyes still impassive as she disappeared.
* * *
"Young Master Ludville."
Butler Rube strolled along the corridor, his gaze widening as he caught sight of Ludville approaching from the opposite end.
"What kind of flower is that?"
The sight of Ludville walking down the hall with a cluster of gypsophila in his arms was enough to draw the gaze of onlookers. Every person he encountered was left stunned.
'F-Flower?'
'Ludville has flowers?'
It was the same for Rube. He wasn't as shocked as everyone else was, but he was a little surprised.
Although, the other party was nonchalant about the whole thing.
"I received it."
"Sorry?"
This time, Rube's mouth dropped open in disbelief.
Who'd give flowers to a man such as Ludville?
Wait…
Gypsophila?
Rube looked at the flowers Ludville was holding with newfound interest, and had a vague idea as to who he had gotten it from.
"Give it to me. I'll hold it for you."
"…"
"Young Master Ludville?"
"No thank you."
"Sorry?"
"It's mine."
"No, I'm not saying I'm going to take it away from you, I'm saying—"
"This is the first time."
"The first time?"
"That child…"
"…?"
"…"
Rube waited for Ludville's next words. However…
Clomp.
"Wh-"
Ludville brushed past him as if he had nothing more to say.
"Ha…"
The Young Master is still the same.
Rube couldn't help but chuckle as he watched Ludville carry the flowers all the way to the far end of the hallway, despite the stunned looks of everyone he crossed paths with.
Meanwhile, Ludville's gaze drifts back to the flowers Camilla has handed him.
'That child…'
'Elder brother!'
'Wasn't that the first time?'
That she called him that?
'It's a welcome gift.'
She smiled so brightly.
Ludville's gaze did not leave the gypsophila throughout his walk.