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Izuku in jail

OceanPizza99
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chs / week
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Synopsis
Izuku is gramed by Deadpool and by having Cocane in U.A

Table of contents

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Chapter 1 - Chapter 1

The afternoon sun cast long shadows across U.A.'s pristine hallways as students filtered out of their classrooms. The usual chatter and laughter echoed off the walls, but it died suddenly when heavy footsteps approached Class 1-A.

Detective Naomasa Tsukauchi led three police officers down the corridor, their navy blue uniforms a stark contrast to the school's cheerful atmosphere. Principal Nezu's small white form walked beside them, his usual friendly demeanor replaced by grim determination.

Inside the classroom, Izuku sat at his desk, organizing his hero analysis notes. His green and black uniform was slightly rumpled from a long day of training. The familiar freckles across his face scrunched together as he concentrated, unaware of what was about to unfold.

"Midoriya Izuku," Detective Tsukauchi's voice cut through the afternoon quiet. The other students froze, heads turning toward the door where the officers stood. Ochako's hand flew to her mouth, while Iida adjusted his glasses nervously.

Izuku looked up, confusion evident in his green eyes. "Detective Tsukauchi? Is something wrong?"

"Please step away from your desk," the detective instructed, his voice professional but tinged with regret. "Officers will need to search your belongings."

The classroom fell deathly silent as two officers approached Izuku's desk. One carefully lifted his green backpack, while the other stood ready. The first officer unzipped the main compartment, reaching inside with gloved hands.

"This can't be right," Aizawa spoke from the doorway, his usually tired eyes now sharp and alert. He'd arrived moments after hearing the commotion, his capture weapon shifting slightly with tension.

The officer withdrew a small package wrapped in plastic, its white contents visible through the clear material. The room seemed to collectively hold its breath.

"Midoriya Izuku," Detective Tsukauchi's voice was heavy. "You're under arrest for possession of illegal substances. You have the right to remain silent..."

"What? No, that's not—that's not mine!" Izuku stood so quickly his chair clattered backward. His face had gone pale, freckles standing out sharply against his skin. "I didn't—I would never—"

"Young Midoriya," Principal Nezu's voice was gentle but firm. "Please cooperate with the officers."

Bakugo slammed his hands on his desk, small explosions crackling. "This is bullshit! Deku's too much of a damn nerd to—"

"Bakugo, stand down," Aizawa's command cut through the growing chaos. His eyes glowed red briefly, quirk activated to prevent any impulsive actions.

As the officers moved to handcuff him, Izuku's shoulders slumped in defeat. Tears welled in his eyes, but he didn't resist. The handcuffs clicked shut around his wrists, the sound echoing in the silent classroom.

"We'll contact your mother," Principal Nezu assured him. "And the school will launch a full investigation into this matter."

The police led Izuku out, his footsteps heavy against the floor. His classmates watched in stunned silence as their friend—the boy who'd always dreamed of being a hero—was escorted away in handcuffs, leaving behind a classroom full of disbelief and unanswered questions.

Through the windows, the afternoon sun continued to shine, indifferent to how quickly a young hero's dreams could crumble.

-

Somewhere in a definitely-not-suspicious warehouse in Japan, Deadpool lounged in a high-backed leather chair that definitely wasn't stolen from Professor X's estate (it totally was). The warehouse's concrete walls were plastered with anime posters, and a single spotlight illuminated him like a B-movie villain. His red and black suit was scuffed from his latest adventure, and a Hello Kitty band-aid adorned his mask where the fabric had torn.

In his lap sat a very irritated unicorn, its rainbow mane shimmering under the spotlight while Deadpool stroked its head like a supervillain with their cat. The unicorn, wearing a name tag that read "Sparkles McStabbington," looked directly into an imaginary camera with pure disgust in its eyes.

"Oh! You're here!" Deadpool perked up, addressing the audience. "I bet you're all wondering about that whole situation with broccoli-head back at U.A. High School." He continued petting the unicorn, which was now trying to impale his chest with its horn. "Rude, Sparkles. Daddy's monologuing."

The unicorn snorted, a small rainbow puff of smoke escaping its nostrils.

"You see, viewers, I couldn't take it anymore. All that 'I can do it' and 'Plus Ultra' garbage." Deadpool made his voice high-pitched, mockingly imitating Izuku. "Oh look at me, I broke all my bones again but I'm still perfect and everybody loves me! I got the most powerful quirk from All Might because I'm such a good boy!"

Deadpool stood dramatically, causing the unicorn to fall to the floor with an indignant whinny. "Do you know how many strings I had to pull to get that cocaine past U.A.'s security? A lot! Like, at least seven strings. Maybe eight. And don't even get me started on convincing that yakuza guy to sell to me. The audacity of him asking if my suit was a knock-off!"

He pulled out a whiteboard from behind his chair, covered in elaborate drawings including stick figures of Izuku with exaggerated tears, several badly drawn unicorns, and what appeared to be a recipe for chimichangas. "It was the perfect plan! Plant the drugs, get the cinnamon roll arrested, and boom! Character development! Now maybe he'll get an actual personality beyond 'Nice Guy Who Tries Hard™'."

The unicorn had gotten up and was now trying to eat the whiteboard.

"No, Sparkles! That's my evil plan board!" Deadpool yanked it away. "Besides, you know what markers do to your digestive system. Remember the glitter incident?"

Turning back to the audience, Deadpool spread his arms wide. "Was it petty? Yes. Was it cruel? Absolutely. Was it because the author of this scene needed a quick explanation for the previous scene's events? You bet your sweet bippy it was! But most importantly..." He paused for dramatic effect, only to be interrupted by the unicorn headbutting him in the back.

"Ow! I'm trying to have a moment here!" He rubbed his lower back. "As I was saying, most importantly, it was hilarious. And let's be honest, some time in jail might teach the kid that not everything can be solved by breaking your fingers and screaming about friendship."

The unicorn had now managed to grab the whiteboard and was galloping around the warehouse with it.

"Hey! Get back here with my evil plan!" Deadpool chased after the unicorn, knocking over his villainous chair in the process. "This is why I wanted a cat! But nooo, the writer had to be quirky and give me a unicorn! Do you know how much rainbow glitter poop I have to clean up?"

As Deadpool disappeared into the shadows of the warehouse, his voice echoed: "And don't any of you dare snitch to the heroes! I know where you live! Well, not really, but it sounded appropriately threatening for a villain monologue!"

The spotlight flickered off, leaving only the sound of hooves, cursing, and the occasional rainbow explosion.