Three days after his flight from Hogwarts, Sirius walked into the newly decorated and gleaming dining room for breakfast and immediately spotted the eye-catching phoenix perched on the back of his chair. A more non-descript brown owl he'd had Kreacher buy and whom he'd named Hooter, was also waiting for him and eyeing the phoenix as suspiciously as Sirius. The owl ward he'd reinforced would have turned away all but his own owls and Harry's Hedwig. He hadn't counted on meddling fire birds.
He'd sent charmed notes to Harry and Remus the previous evening saying nothing but variations of that he was safe somewhere sunny and that he would stay in touch. He didn't want Dumbledore to think he was still in Britain or alerted in any way to what Sirius had planned.
Because Sirius had a plan.
He had written everything on a large blackboard in the study and annotated it with sketches of Prongs and Moony. It had been a method he'd used with major pranks at school and important missions when he'd been an Auror. It worked well for him. He had a large tick by the first step – assume the Lordship of the House of Black, and had happily ticked off 'contact Harry and Remus' before going to bed. He just hoped the rest of the plan wasn't going to come to a screaming halt with the presence of Dumbledore's familiar.
"You'd better hand it over then, Fawkes." Sirius said resigned, sitting down. He savoured for a moment the feel of clean clothes (Regulus's cast-offs freshly laundered by Kreacher but he wasn't complaining) against his scrubbed skin; the knowledge of his newly cut shoulder-length hair and trimmed neat beard. He looked and felt human.
Fawkes dropped the parchment he was carrying into Sirius's hand and gave a reassuring trill that made him think the bird was trying to tell him not to worry.
"Sirius,
Thank you for the owl you sent to Harry. I've instructed him that I would reply using Fawkes in case the Ministry tries to track any correspondence…"
"That…"
Fawkes trilled again.
Sirius waved the letter at him. "Oh I don't think he's just being careful, Fawkes. Who is he to tell my godson that he can't write to me?" He glowered. "He could have suggested that Harry write a note for you to carry."
Fawkes tilted his head and bobbed it slightly as though conceding the point.
Sirius read the rest of the note aloud. "It was good to hear you have found somewhere to recover from your time in Azkaban. Take all the time you need, dear boy. I would ask you not to take risks for Harry's sake; he would be most upset if you were to be captured. Be assured that I will see to Harry's safety in your absence." He scowled. "Love and kisses, Albus."
He glowered at Fawkes who had trilled back at him admonishingly.
"OK, so he didn't send me love and kisses but, Fawkes, this is full of double speak and you know it." He gestured with the letter again. "What he's actually saying is: stay away from Harry. You and I both know it." He sighed. "Do you think that's what Harry wants?" Of course he had no true idea about what Harry would want. He hoped Harry's delight at the idea of living him had been real.
Fawkes tilted his head and flew back to Sirius and nudged Sirius's chest with his head. Warmth filled Sirius, comforting him. Harry did want him in his life. The memory of Harry's smile when Sirius had made his offer for the teen to live with him filled his mind.
Sirius breathed out and stroked Fawke's plumage. "Thank you for the reassurance, Fawkes. I needed that." His eyes narrowed on the bird. "You agree with me, don't you? That Harry would be better away from the muggles?"
Fawkes cooed brightly.
"So, you won't be telling your nosy old wizard where I am?" Sirius started to smile as Fawkes bobbed his head in agreement. "Thank you." He said. He'd still look into adding a phoenix ward though; maybe one that would allow Fawkes but banish any wizard he might be unexpectedly transporting.
The phoenix sent him another admonishing look as though he'd read Sirius's mind and took flight. He disappeared in a show of flames.
Hooter gave a squawk, reminding Sirius he was waiting. Sirius handed over some bacon as an apology and took the letter. It was blank. Sirius grinned and tapped it with his wand. "I solemnly swear I am up to no good."
"Padfoot,
I'm glad you're safe. I've returned to my home near Oxford as I resigned from Hogwarts. Snape managed to let slip about my furry problem and, well, we both know what would happen so I left before Albus was placed in the unfortunate position of having to fire me. Truthfully, it is probably for the best – I was careless after all on the full moon, and I almost ended up hurting the children. It's certainly my fault that Peter got free.
My only regret is that I won't be able to spend more time with Harry but I'm reminded that it's a selfish desire when I think of all the time I've already spent with him and that you have been denied."
Sirius snorted. He couldn't deny he'd felt jealous at the idea of Moony spending time with Harry but he'd been relieved that at least Harry had Moony. Only he didn't anymore. "Stupid Snivellus." He muttered under his breath.
"Talking of Harry, there are things I need to tell you. I know it's probably for the best that you don't tell anyone where you are but…well, I've missed you, my friend, and I think our discussion will need to be face to face. Send word when you think it's safe for us to meet.
Take care, Moony."
Sirius felt his emotions surge and took a deep breath. He'd restarted his Occlumency training the night before in order to regain some control of his mind and his emotional state; his thoughts were too inclined to drift, his moods to swing. He had to get some control over himself if he was going to look after Harry.
Kreacher popped up beside him. "Do you wish something different for breakfast, Lord Black?"
"What?" Sirius stared down at his uneaten food. "Uh, no. I just hadn't started eating."
Kreacher placed a nutrient potion beside the plate and disappeared.
Sirius scrunched his face up in disgust but drank down the potion. He needed it and the food he tucked into with gusto. The kitchen had been returned to immaculate condition and he was enjoying Kreacher's cooking.
In fact the whole first floor of the house had been renovated since Sirius's arrival; old décor and furnishings had been thrown out and replaced or revamped. Warm neutral colours of browns, creams and gold pervaded. Red had been used as an accent including the study where the walls had been painted a warm maroon colour. Landscape paintings had remained but all others had been placed in storage in the attic including that of Phineas Nigellus Black. As a former Headmaster of Hogwarts, the portrait could have spied on him for Dumbledore, and despite Kreacher stating that Phineas hadn't visited his portrait in Black Manor for years, Sirius wasn't taking any chances. His mother's sleeping portrait had been given to Kreacher as a reward; house elf magic unsticking the damn thing from the wall. He had no intention of ever wakening her portrait ever again nor seeking her advice.
Even if he could use someone other than Kreacher to talk to about his plan.
His eyes fell on Remus's letter. Moony. Of course, he could ask Moony to come and stay with him – to help him. It was perfect. Remus would have a job and…and Sirius would have to be very careful about how he offered it or Moony's pride would get in the way of him taking it.
He finished his breakfast and sent a note to Remus with the second owl he'd purchased; a black majestic and distinctive looking bird bought for when he needed to send mail as Lord Black. He'd named it Reg in honour of his late brother. The note invited Remus for an interview that afternoon to be the steward of an Ancient House that had just been claimed. Sirius had included details of the salary, duties and benefits – and the address. If Remus was interested the letter would act as a portkey delivering him to his interview; if he wished to decline he could do so by reply.
Sirius hoped Remus would accept – he had questions for his friend about Harry, about what had happened in the intervening years when Sirius had been in Azkaban. And he'd missed him too.
The next few hours were torture. He had to distract himself with helping Kreacher cleanse the basement of dark magic. Sirius had no use for a potions lab or a torture cell, and they were turning the area instead into a combination gymnasium and duelling room; he needed to get his fitness back. But not before too long, Remus's scheduled arrival time was upon him and Sirius made his way to the reception room. He'd swung from optimistic hope that Remus would accept his invitation to pessimistic certainty that he wouldn't despite Reg returning without a reply.
Remus arrived on time, landing with ease. His face broke into a wide smile at the sight of Sirius and he dived across the room to sweep him into a hard hug.
"Padfoot. I thought it might be you!" Remus pulled back and grinned at him.
"Moony." Sirius couldn't stop smiling. He hugged Remus again and let him go before he embarrassed himself and burst into tears of relief.
"Well, as much as I'm sad there isn't a job, I'm delighted to see you." Remus said happily. "I can't believe you stayed in England!"
"I have plans," Sirius said tentatively, "and I'm afraid the job offer is real, Moony. I, um," he gestured vaguely to the newly painted crest on the wall as though to point it out to Remus, "I might have claimed the Lordship of the House of Black."
Remus goggled at him.
"Come with me and I'll explain everything." Sirius said, pulling Remus out of the room and to the study.
o-O-o
Sirius leaned back in his chair and twirled his wand thoughtfully as Remus stared at the blackboard and then back at Dumbledore's letter on the desk in front of them. He'd been doing the same thing for five minutes and Sirius couldn't quite stop himself from thinking it wasn't a good sign.
Remus sighed and took a fortifying sip of tea. "Well, I can understand why you've gone this route, Padfoot." He tapped the ceramic mug he held. "Despite my own debt to Albus, I've spent most of this last year alternating between wanting to thank Albus for the opportunity to finally get to know Harry and wanting to hex him for keeping me out of his life to date."
"How did that happen?" asked Sirius curious to know what had occurred.
His friend grimaced but met his gaze. "As soon as I got the news, I came back from Romania just in time to attend the small funeral for James and Lily at Godric's Hollow," he forestalled Sirius's question by raising a hand and answering it, "Potter House including the family cemetery there must have gone immediately under a Death Fidelius and obviously its location would have only been known to someone in the House of Potter."
Like Sirius who had been granted sanctuary in the House of Potter.
"I and the Longbottoms accosted Albus after the funeral both about you and about Harry." He shook his head at the memories. "I wanted to visit both of you – you so I could hex you into a million pieces and Harry so I could confirm he was safe and well. Albus informed me that you had already been sentenced to Azkaban."
Sirius waved away the information. "What about Harry?"
"Well, Albus confirmed that he had taken Harry to Lily's sister in the muggle world and she had assumed guardianship; that it was a done deal. Alice was furious but Albus pointed out you were in prison, they had been under Fidelius and he had no idea who their Secret Keeper was. Anyway, Frank said that was fine but now that they were out of hiding, they would take guardianship of Harry as James and Lily had wanted."
"And then they got attacked." Sirius murmured, trying to piece together the disparate information he'd managed to gather the previous year.
"Actually they were attacked two weeks later." Remus sighed heavily. "In that interim period, the Ministry demanded proof to overturn the guardianship of a blood relative. Well, the Longbottoms' didn't have a copy of the will. The Potters' solicitors Arkam and Arkam claimed theirs had gone missing." He took a breath. "I searched through your stuff at your old place since I had a key but couldn't find a copy there either. Gringotts claimed they couldn't open the Potter vaults without a Potter to retrieve the original."
"My copy of the will is in my vault." Sirius said quietly.
"Of course it is," Remus said, "I surmised as much at the time." He paused. "Frank and I had just agreed that the only thing for it was for him to negotiate with your grandfather to claim the vault under the House of Black and provide them with the will if it was there, but before he could, like you said, he and Alice were attacked."
Sirius shook his head, thinking how everything had conspired to go horribly wrong for Harry's guardianship after the death of his parents.
"Anyway, with the Longbottoms incapacitated and Augusta dealing with one traumatised baby, the whole thing was dropped. I know James and Lily had probably made provisions for if both you and Alice were unavailable and I toyed with asking your grandfather, but knew that unlike the Longbottoms I had no political leverage to get him to give me the will and I didn't want to give him the idea of, well…"
"Making a claim for Harry himself?" Sirius nodded slowly. "Wise. He would have done it. And you remember James and I used to joke that we were cousins? The relationship is a few times removed but…"
"Your grandfather would have run with it, and with you named as guardian in the will, it would have strengthened his claim." Remus took another sip of his drink. "I dropped the idea of guardianship and went back to Albus to request access."
"Which he refused." Sirius determined harshly.
"Said the wards had been set to deter dark creatures and regardless he had promised that interaction with the wizarding world would be minimal until Harry was old enough to attend Hogwarts."
"And by minimal, Albus presumably meant to say non-existent." Sirius said caustically, already upset on Remus's behalf for the dark creature comment.
"I argued with him that he couldn't leave Harry there without any oversight at all. He argued that with the wards he would know if Harry was attacked by Death Eaters. I argued that it wasn't good enough. He eventually conceded that perhaps someone placed locally to observe was a good idea." Remus's gaze darkened. "Then he argued that it couldn't be me as a young man interested in a small child would be suspected as a paedophile."
Sirius growled.
Remus's expression cleared and he gave an appreciative smile. "I know, Padfoot. I was upset too. But I had to concede the point. My interest in Harry would have been deemed unusual."
"At least you got him to put someone in to check on him. Figg, right? The batty old woman who used to come to the Order meetings stinking of kneazles? I saw her when I went there after I escaped." Sirius felt his anger at Dumbledore stir again; felt his certainty that Harry wasn't safe at the muggles grow.
"I never knew who it was." Remus took a calming breath. "After my confrontation with Albus, I was still determined to find some way of being in Harry's life but unfortunately a couple of days later my father had a stroke and was hospitalised. My next few months were filled with trying to look after him, and my mother who was distraught. He died early the next year and my mother a few weeks later, from a broken heart, I think."
"I'm sorry, Remus." Sirius said softly. He'd liked Remus's parents; they had been good people.
Remus nodded an acknowledgement. "I was a mess. I'd lost too much of my pack all at once. By the time I came out of the depression, Harry was six years old."
"But you tried to see him." Sirius said firmly.
"Both of you, actually." Remus smiled at Sirius's surprise. "The mind healer said it would be useful to lay my ghosts to rest and I had so many questions, Padfoot, about why you'd done it. It didn't make any sense to me. I was very confused."
Sirius sighed at another lost opportunity for him to have seen someone; to have told his story sooner. "I'm guessing you didn't get permission."
"While I'd been wallowing in grief, there had been a backlash against werewolves including a new restriction that stated that we were not permitted to visit inmates of Azkaban." Remus shrugged. "I decided I had to leave you in the past and I'm sorry about that."
Sirius waved away the apology. "And Harry?"
"I decided to ask Petunia directly and managed to track her down through muggle means. I sent her a muggle letter reminding her that I was a friend of Lily's, and requesting to see Harry as he was of school age and possibly was curious about his parents. I offered to help her explain magic and the wizarding world to him." He harrumphed. "She actually did write back very politely telling me essentially to sod off. Harry was a normal child and he was going to a normal school, and any questions he had about his parents she would answer."
"Normal?" Sirius repeated. "Harry turned my hair pink at three months."
"I know." Remus sipped his tea. "I was concerned and wrote to Albus, leaving out that I had already approached Petunia. I asked for an update on Harry and requested again to see him. Albus…"
"Told you everything was hunky-dory."
"That was the gist." Remus gave a pained smile. "He reminded me he had promised Petunia minimal interaction until Harry went to Hogwarts. He suggested that it was not wise for me to dwell on the past and to focus on the present. He was certain I would be reunited with Harry in good time."
Sirius snorted.
"I know," Remus agreed mildly, "I had started to conclude that Albus had no intention of letting me near Harry. Well, on bad days when I couldn't find work or got heckled for being a werewolf it was mein particular and on good days it was anyone."
"You didn't give up." Sirius stated with a knowing smile.
"I did for a while," Remus conceded, "I had to go abroad for work, but I wrote to Albus in the June before Harry turned eleven. I offered to take him his Hogwarts letter, explain everything and take him shopping in Diagon Alley." He took another sip of his tea. "Again, he refused. Only Hogwarts' staff could inform students. I found out who he did send this year while I was teaching there. You know who Albus got to do it?"
Sirius shook his head. He hoped it hadn't been Snape.
"Hagrid."
"Hagrid." Sirius repeated numbly. He loved Hagrid, he did, but if he was asked to choose someone to send to introduce a child to the wizarding world… Hagrid would not have been on his list of candidates – even Snape would have been better. And Harry would have needed a proper introduction by the sound of it.
"Like I said, hexing Albus has been on my list of things to do this year." Remus put the mug down finally. "I wrote back to Albus once Harry began school suggesting perhaps I could begin a correspondence with Harry. Again, the answer was no: Harry was just adjusting to his life in the wizarding world and his unique history. I tried writing to Harry directly anyway and the owl returned just as it always did. Of course, half our world probably tried writing to him in his first year."
Sirius frowned, concerned. It made sense for Harry to have had an owl refusal ward placed on him but clearly exceptions could be made since Sirius's mail had made it to Harry.
"Then out of the blue, Hagrid wrote to me. He was hoping to put together a photo album of James and Lily for Harry." Remus gestured. "I went through my albums and what I had taken from your place and sent them to him. I asked him to let Harry know I would be more than happy to spend time talking Harry through the pictures. Hagrid sent a thank you but nothing more."
Remus rubbed his forehead. "So, once again, I waited until school started and wrote to Albus requesting politely to allow my owl through to Harry."
"You are nothing if not persistent, Moony." Sirius commented dryly. Others would have given up.
"I had nothing to lose," Remus responded, "and I was hoping Albus had run out of excuses."
"But?"
"Albus hadn't run out of excuses." Remus said dryly. "It was another 'please be patient' reply. I probably would have pushed it but I lost my job a week or so later and had to go back to France for work."
Sirius wondered if that had been Dumbledore's doing but he shook the thought away. Surely, even the old man wouldn't have gone to those lengths to deny Remus a place in Harry's life.
Remus smiled and it was not a happy smile but rather a predatory one. "And then you escaped from Azkaban."
"And suddenly Albus needed you." Sirius concluded. He had suspected from his sneaky observations of Harry over the previous months as Padfoot that Remus hadn't been part of Harry's life prior to the school year but he had hoped… "Well, that explains a lot."
"Oh, it doesn't stop there," Remus said, "as soon as he made his offer of employment, Albus said I must promise to let Harry come to me first and not to say anything about his parents until he asked; that it could be upsetting for Harry for me to bring up the topic."
Sirius lurched to his feet, too upset to sit still. "You didn't promise did you?"
Remus held up a hand, "I promised with no real intention of keeping it. Once a Marauder…" he let his voice trail away but Sirius got the message; Remus had intended to find some way of circumventing Albus's wishes. "But then I met Harry and I…I couldn't bring myself to tell him."
"What?" Sirius snapped.
"I pretty much froze." Remus flushed with embarrassment. "I'd been fighting so hard to see Harry that I lost sight of the fact that he wouldn't be the same cheeky chap who called me Mooey and demanded cuddles as soon as I walked in the door. Instead there was this quiet intense thirteen year old boy who didn't know me from Merlin and…I hadn't considered until I actually saw him; what if he doesn't like me? What if he finds out about my furry problem and…" he stopped abruptly.
Sirius paused in his pacing and threw himself into the second visitor's chair opposite Remus. He could understand Remus's position. He'd had his own moments of disorientation with Harry; of trying to reconcile the happy baby he'd loved so unconditionally with the teenage boy he was watching over, had talked to so very briefly; a teenage boy he didn't actually know and who didn't know him. "So you waited."
Remus nodded unhappily. "I realised that I should have just told him as soon as I introduced myself and bugger my lack of courage and Albus's well-intentioned concern." He sighed. "Because that's the thing, Padfoot: on the face of it, all of Albus's actions look like well-intentioned concern and a desire to protect Harry, especially when you consider Harry's role as the Boy Who Lived." He paused again. "Taken individually, none of Albus's actions are sinister."
"He circumvented the system and the will." Sirius pointed out.
"Yes, but did he know for certain the contents of the will? Do you remember if he was a witness?" Remus responded.
Sirius shook his head. He couldn't remember who had been the signed witnesses with any clarity.
"And, without the will, taking Harry to Petunia was probably what the Wizarding Orphan Office would have done anyway," Remus continued, "Petunia is Harry's closest living family. Add to that Harry was probably safer in the muggle world from the Death Eaters looking for revenge at the time, and I'm sure Albus keeping everybody else away from Harry was also meant to ensure that safety." He gave a small shrug. "And, from some comments Albus let slip, I think he hoped Harry would have a normal upbringing since our world had already given itself over to The Boy Who Lived madness."
"Exactly how did that get started?" Sirius asked. "Nobody really knows what happened beyond the bare facts and…"
"Probably a combination of Hagrid and Peter." Remus interrupted. "Hagrid was never the most discreet of the Order and I rather suspect Peter or rather Wormtail was there that night. I think he saw what happened and told the tale to whoever he could as soon as he could to ensure attention was on Harry and away from himself."
"Damn it." Sirius snapped. "If he was there when I was there…"
"Then he knew you would be searching for him." Remus smiled sadly. "It explains why he managed to get the better of you."
Sirius pushed the thought away and refocused on Harry. "OK," he said slowly, "so we provisionally accept that Dumbledore placed Harry with the best of intentions…" When he'd considered the matter alone, he'd reached that conclusion but it was somewhat comforting to know Remus was in agreement.
"But it doesn't explain why he's missed the abuse since." Remus interrupted.
Sirius stilled. "You know that for certain?"
"I ended up spending a great deal of time overseeing detentions for the Weasley twins, Fred and George." Remus began. "Minerva kept giving them to me as revenge for our school days, I think, and…"
"What does this…"
"You remember Ron is Harry's best friend." Remus interrupted. "The twins are in Gryffindor and on the quidditch team with Harry. They're very fond of him; consider him an honorary Weasley."
Sirius's confusion dissipated.
Remus folded his hands over his stomach. "Last week, at the beginning of their detention, I made a comment that I was worried about the home life of a friend of theirs and while I didn't want to put them in the position of breaking confidences, I would appreciate any information they could give me." He sighed. "They immediately knew it was Harry and were very reluctant to talk, but once they began…"
"They couldn't stop." Sirius finished.
Remus's eyes flashed angrily. "The summer after his first year, they found him locked in his room and barely fed. They recovered his trunk from a locked cupboard under the stairs which had an old picture taped up saying 'Harry's Room.' They said that they didn't think Harry had received Christmas or birthday presents. They know his muggle clothes are hand-me-downs. The rest, well, it's all speculative."
Sirius grabbed the arms of the chair, his knuckles turning white.
"When I resigned, I tried to talk to Albus about what the twins had told me and he didn't seem at all surprised." Remus said in a calm tone that belied the furious light in his eyes. "He claimed that while yes, Harry's relatives didn't provide the best care, the Dursleys continued to be the safest place for Harry. In my opinion, he's being wilfully blind not only to the mistreatment, but to the effect such mistreatment has on a child."
Sirius raised his eyebrows at the very evident snarl in the words. "Maybe we should drop this. Neither of us can afford to go after muggles or Dumbledore with murder in mind. We're going to get Harry away from them, I swear."
His friend stared at him for a long moment, but the heat in his eyes faded. "I never thought I'd see the day Sirius Black advocated caution."
"Harry," Sirius said firmly, "is more important than anything. I've learnt my lesson."
"Well said, Sirius." Remus reached over and patted his arm proudly. He hesitated momentarily until Sirius made a get-on-with-it gesture. "I'm just wondering if you want me to tell you about Harry's first two years at Hogwarts?"
"Of course! I want to know all about Harry!" Sirius responded immediately. Why would Remus be so hesitant? He froze. "Did…did something happen?"
Remus sighed heavily. "I'm afraid you're not going to like this."